ALMOST (Vol.1)/SJU Series#1

Chapter Four

CORINTHIAN

Men were in tuxes while ladies were all in long gowns. Everything was set perfectly and accordingly on what I really wanted or much better to say-- what Mom had planned for tonight. Everyone was smiling and seemed happy except for us. I hate this party and hoped to end this already. Tonight was my twentieth day of existence but here I was sulking in one corner.

I would've make up excuses but mom would surely bombard me with a lot of questions which I think I couldn't handle. Aside from that, I don't want to give dad a heart attack though he surprised me with an unexpected news–the announcement of my pre-engagement to Zachary Miguel Rios.

He was my childhood friend and he got a girlfriend who had no idea about this bullshit. I never see this thing coming! I wished I could teleport somewhere else just to get rid of this place and of this stupid situation I had gotten into. The feeling was sucking me to death! I gulped in my martini down to my throat and it seemed like a bitter taste in my mouth, though this wasn't my first time ingesting the fluid. I felt betrayed by dad. Hindi nga siya nagpatumpik-tumpik nang mag–desisyon. I didn't expect this would be the equivalent for the freedom I had in one f*****g night!

Zachary held my wet and cold hands and pressed them on his. I really wanna cry this very moment. He was Mr.Nice-Guy-and-Prince-Charming-kind, yet he's really not my type of guy. Bakit naman kasi ganito kung kailan nasa paligid lang si Dashiel? Huwag naman sana niyang maisip na ipagpapalit ko siya dahil hindi talaga mangyayari iyon. Not in this lifetime. He was the only love of my life. Sa kanya lang ako. Kahit ilang anak ilalabas ko basta siya ang kasama ko'ng gumawa.

"I know you're upset about this engagement thing. I'm really sorry, Corinthian," he apologized.

I cleared my throat. I could feel the heaviness in my heart. My eyes began to water and a silent sob escaped from my mouth. Zach handed me his hanky but I just stared at it and continued on crying. I covered my face and my sob turned a little bit louder than any moment now we can catch the guest's attention. He then pulled me into a warm hug, trapping me inside his muscled arms. I reached for his neck then wrapped my arms around it to get a grip. I could feel my body trembling because of the tension.

"If you think that I had known this beforehand then you're wrong. I had no idea about this." Zachary said, wiping the tears in my eyes.

I looked at him and sniffed. My throat aches so much that I felt like there was torn inside it. Barado na rin ang ilong ko dahil mabilis na nag-activate ang sipon ko. Ang sama talaga ng loob ko kay dad. I needed to talk to him as soon as this party ended.

"Of course, they wouldn't let us know about this. Kaya nga sinorpresa nila tayo di ba?" I hissed and rolled my eyes.

He let out a deep breath and sighed in resignation. Zach stared at me with such gloomy eyes. I do know how much he loves his girlfriend, Cameron, who was a nursing student based abroad. I met the girl twice when I had my vacation in Australia last year. She's kind and sweet.

"Why are you staring at me like that?" I can't help but ask.

He chuckled before pinching my cheek.

"Bakit ang ganda mo pa rin kahit nagkalat na eyeliner mo?" He asked looking amused.

I immediately wiped my eyes. Gosh! Baka mukha na akong zombie dahil sa nagkalat kong eye makeup. He laughed boisterously, holding his hard tummy. Hindi ko tuloy napigilan na suntukin ang balikat niya. He held my hand and brought it to his lips to kissed it. Oh, this guy was a total gentleman.

"Don't worry this engagement will not take place. You are not my type," he assured.

He was smiling, showing his not-so-perfect teeth. Medyo sungki kasi ang mga ngipin niya sa bandang ibaba pero hindi naman yun nakabawas sa gandang lalaki niya. A smile broke my loneliness in an instant.

"The feeling is mutual, Zach, but I'm worried about dad. I know for sure he will get mad if we tell them that we don't want this f*****g agreement. What do we do now?" Anxiety was all over me.

He sighed again and let out a tired huff. "Ako na ang bahalang magpaliwanag kay Tito Manolo and sa parents ko. Just relax, okay? Kakatayin ako ni Cameron kapag nalaman niya 'to. Grabe pa naman 'yun kung magselos."

I smiled sheepishly and secretly wished dad would understand. He smiled back at me. I was about to enter a new topic when I heard his voice.

"Excuse me, ise-serve ko lang ang dessert niyo, senyorita." Dashiel said. I flinched at the acidity in his voice.

Our eyes met but he remained stoic. He was marvelous wearing the server's attire. Kahit ano yata ang isuot niya ay bagay sa kanya. Feeling ko tuloy naghugis puso ang mga mata ko. The way he stares at me made my throat dry. I blinked my eyes slowly and harrumphed. He served the dessert quietly then excused himself. Hindi na ulit ako sinulyapan. Nataranta tuloy ako kaya naman bigla akong napatayo. We hadn't talked to each other since then. Yeah, the time I tried to seduce him.

"Wait, Ian. Where are you going?" Zach asked, grabbing my wrist.

I looked at him but didn't speak. His brows crumpled but his eyes glinted with amusement. I shook my head slowly then let go of his hold.

"Sige na. Ako na bahala magpalusot kapag hinanap ka nila," sabi niya at nginisihan pa ako.

In another time, I would have laughed, but not today. I inhaled deeply then breathe out.

"Thank you so much. I owe this to you." I told him, running away from the party.

DASHIEL

Oo. Wala akong karapatang magselos pero hindi ko mapigilan. Sa totoo lang gusto kong manapak dahil sa tindi ng inis at selos. Tumingala ako sa madilim na langit at marahas na bumuga ng hangin. Sinuklay ko pataas ang aking buhok gamit ang mga kamay bago inihilamos sa aking mukha. Pakiramdam ko ay para akong sinasakal at hindi makahinga habang nakamasid kay Ian at sa lalaking nakayakap sa kanya. Mapait akong napangiti bago pinaglapat ang aking labi. Ang babaeng matagal ko ng gusto ay nakatakda na palang ikasal sa iba. Ang hirap niya talagang abutin. Mariin kong ipinikit ang aking mga mata at muling nagmura. Inis na tinanggal ko ang suot na vest at ipinatong sa aking balikat.

"Bakit ba kasi ikaw pa?" Tanong ko sa kawalan.

"Sino ba dapat?" Tanong ng boses ng babae na kilalang kilala ko. Awtomatiko akong napalingon sa likuran ko.

Mabilis siyang nakalapit sa akin at yumakap. Inilibot ko ang paningin sa paligid at baka may makakita sa amin. Idinidikta ng puso ko na yakapin siya ngunit pilit na lumalaban ang isipan ko. Ano nga ba ang paiiralin ko sa pagkakataong ito? Isip o Puso? Sa huli ay ipinasya kong ilayo siya sa katawan ko. Ako na lang ang mag-aadjust. Hindi ko maialis ang tingin ko kay Ian. Ang ganda niya lalo sa suot niyang pulang long gown. Hakab sa kanyang katawan kaya naman kitang kita ang hugis ng kanyang katawan. Hindi siya ganon kaseksi katulad ng mga ex-girlfriends pero siya lang ang bukod tanging kinababaliwan ko ng ganito.

Hahayaan mo na lang na ganyan kayo? Tanong ng maliit na boses sa aking isip.

"Siguradong hinahanap ka na d'un," matabang na saad ko.

Umiling siya at nakita ko na lang na tumutulo na ang mga luha niya. Lihim akong napamura ulit.

"Duwag! Duwag ka, Dashiel! Hindi mo kayang aminin ang tunay na nararamdaman mo," galit na sabi niya, nakakuyom pa ang mga palad.

Namulsa ako at pinakatitigan siya ng maigi. Tuloy-tuloy ang agos ng luha niya at nagkalat na ang make-up sa kanyang mukha pero kahit gan'on ang ganda pa rin niya. Suminghot-singhot pa siya at sumisigok-sigok. Ang totoo gusto ko siyang ikulong sa mga bisig ko at halikan ng buong init pero muli ay pinigilan kong gawin .

"Stop crying, Ian. Hindi tayo pwede," sabi ko at gusto ko sana idugtong ang salitang "sa ngayon" ngunit hindi ko na itinuloy pa.

Sisiguraduhin ko na magiging kami sa tamang panahon at pagkakataon. Ako mismo ang magtatakda. I looked away and exhaled. May kung anong makapangyarihang damdamin ang lumukob sa akin at hindi ko napaglabanan iyon. Inilang hakbang ko lang ang pagitan naming dalawa bago mabilis na ipinulupot ang aking mga braso sa kanyang malambot at mabangong katawan. Yumakap siya pabalik at lalo pang umiyak ng umiyak. Hinagod ko ang kanyang likod para kumalma siya. I kissed her temple and sniffed on her hair.

"Mahal kita, Dash at nararamdaman ko na mahal mo rin ako. Ayokong magpakasal kung hindi rin lang naman sa'yo," umiiyak na sabi niya at mabagal na umiiling.

Hindi na siya nagsalita pa sa halip ay lalo pang lumakas ang kanyang pag-iyak. Humigpit din ang kapit niya sa aking damit na basang basa na ng kanyang luha. Kung paano namin haharapin ang bukas ay magkasama naming gagawin gaano man kahirap iyon, pero magmula dito ay ipinapangako ko na hinding hindi ko na siya bibitawan pa. Bahala na si batman! Sabay naming binagtas ang daan pabalik sa kanyang party.

Tahimik lang kaming naglalakad at pasulyap sulyap sa isa't-isa. Dinig ko ang paghugot niya ng malalim na buntong–hininga. Nang huminto ako ay huminto rin siya, nagtitigan muna kami bago ko siya hinila sa medyo madilim na parte ng mansiyon. Sa likod ng malaking buhos ng pader. Nagpatianod naman si Ian at hindi ko naringgan ng anumang reklamo. Maliwanag ang sinag ng buwan na siyang nagsisilbing ilaw para mamasdan ko pa lalo ang kanyang magandang mukha niya.

"I love you," hindi ko napigilang sabihin yun. Kusa lang iyon na lumabas sa bibig ko.

Pilyang ngiti ang ibinalik niya sa akin. Heto na naman ang babaeng 'to at balak pa yatang parusahan ang puson ko. Ipinulupot niya ang mga braso sa aking leeg at hinalikan ako. Her lips were soft and inviting. I pressed her closer to my body and clenched my fist on her small waist. I kissed her gently at first then slowly became wild. We shared the same air as our wet lips clasped together. Fisting her hair and deepening the kiss, she moaned inside my mouth. I could feel my growing arousal down there. She responded to my kisses with such abandonment.

"Take me, Dashiel. Fill me in," she murmured as we continued kissing.

I would love to do it but no. Hindi ito ang tamang panahon. She's young and the possibilities were endless for us. Ayokong sirain kaming dalawa at ang mga pangarap namin sa buhay. I pulled out from the kiss and laid my forehead against her.

"I don't wanna f**k you, babe. I want to make love to you in our perfect sexy time." I slowly said and hoped she wouldn't insist on the deed anymore.

Lumayo siya ng bahagya at kinagat ang lower lip. "I understand. Am I your official girl now?" Excitement in her voice. Hinapit ko ulit ang bewang niya.

"Yes, baby," tugon ko bago muling hinalikan ang nakaabang niyang labi.