Bedroom Hymns

Chapter 5: The Moment I Knew

*Three Years Earlier*

That weekend there was a return to school party which was just an excuse to get drunk on cheap wine and beer. Kate had never cared to go to any parties at Nimue as she would rather practice with her viola and focus on what she was actually there for her. Jess was the more social of the two and would go to parties when she was in the mood. Kate wouldn't be there if Theo hadn't asked her to come so they could talk more about the ritual and she could return the grimoire to him.

The party was by the lake and Kate didn't know any of the people there. Feeling out of place, she stayed by Jess who was making idle chit-chat with people she knew from class. Kate was slightly relieved when Theo arrived flanked by his friends. He saw Kate and made a beeline for her.

"Kate," Theo said. "I'm glad you could make it."

She reached into her backpack and pulled out the grimoire, handing it back to him. She had put a glamour spell on the cover to make it less suspicious. He tucked it under his arm and gestured to the woods away from the partygoers.

Jess hooked her arm around Kate's. "I'm her cousin Jess. I'm going with her."

"She knows about the…you know what," Kate added, wary of all the people around them who could be listening in.

Theo didn't see fazed at all and nodded in agreement. "Let's go talk somewhere more private."

As they went further into the woods, the darker it became despite the moon.

"Lucidus," Theo murmured and a ball of glowing light appeared in the palm of his hand, illuminating their faces. "Let's cut to the chase, shall we? We all know why we're here."

"The ritual is dangerous. You could both die trying to cast it," Jess remarked. "People have died in the past attempting this ritual. And there are so many things that could go wrong."

Theo seemed to have expected the opposition and had a reply. "I've researched the bonding spell for years. We've picked the right time and place to cast it."

"We would need a coven," Kate pointed out.

Theo nodded towards his friends. "I have one."

"Hi. I'm Hari," Theo's friend piped up with a friendly smile. "We're going to channel Samhain and we'll cast the ritual near a ley line. It's no longer active but it can still give us the needed power boost."

"A full coven would be ideal," Jess said. "Could we get thirteen people?"

"The less people the fewer chances of us getting caught," Theo returned. "The professors aren't going to let us do this ritual so we have to keep knowledge about it to ourselves."

"Let me get this straight. None of the professors know you're going to cast a highly dangerous and illegal bonding ritual that could kill you?"

"Nathan here," Theo's other friend interjected. "In the interest of us not going to jail for casting said illegal ritual, the professors can't know and hopefully we'll never find out."

"If we don't end up prison or die, we'll end up expelled," Theo's female friend added with a frown. "It's Genevieve, by the way."

Kate was trying to make sense of this harebrained plan. She met Theo's gaze and his eyes were unusually striking under the moonlight.

"You don't have to if you don't want to," Nathan told her. He turned to Theo and implored, "We could find somebody else."

Before Theo could reply, Jess cut in, "Don't you have a girlfriend? Why didn't you ask her?"

"We broke up."

"And Kate was your second choice?"

"Not exactly."

"There are no other girls you could've asked?" Jess questioned. "No other witches who would jump at the chance to be married to you?"

"We're not getting married."

Jess rolled her eyes, crossing her arms over her chest. "What would you call it then?"

"Magically bound to each other for life."

"And does that sound better to you?"

Kate should probably tell Jess to stop being so belligerent but she knew her cousin was only being protective of her. Theo's friends would say anything to save him from dying. Jess was the only one on her side and trying to protect her from harm.

Theo sighed. "I'm not asking Kate to give up her life."

"You're asking her to risk dying so you don't have to." Jess scowled at him. She spat, "Did you choose her because she had nothing much to lose? Everybody knows she doesn't have much of a life so only a few people would miss her."

Kate winced. It was a harsh but honest assessment of her. Jess wasn't trying to hurt her. She was just trying to decipher Theo's motives even if she was going at it aggressively.

"That's not why I chose her," Theo answered, calmly. He appeared unruffled by Jess's impromptu interrogation. "Fate chose her for me. She's my soul mate and it's because of that this ritual will work."

"How are you sure?"

"This bonding ritual dates back to Ancient Egypt when magic was wild and unregulated," Genevieve spoke up. "They wanted bonds that could last beyond death. Their magic will become one. Her magic will heal him."

Kate blanched at that, suddenly wanting to throw Theo's grimoire into the bottom of the lake. She had read the handwriting in archaic Latin. This wasn't just Old Magic. This was archaic magic back before certain spells were considered too dangerous and had to be outlawed.

"Will I die if he does?" Kate asked. "How tied will I be to him?"

Kate did not want to die if something happened to Theo Frost. She may not have much of a life outside of playing viola but it was still hers. She wanted to travel and see the world. And she didn't want to die before she could even legally drink.

"The surviving texts about the ritual that weren't cleansed by the United Council of Magic differ. Some felt emotionally connected, others couldn't be physically separated, and a few were consumed thoroughly by each other."

"Consumed?"

"It's togetherness in every sense. They couldn't live without each other." Genevieve looked pensive as she continued, "When one died, the other followed and not because of the bond but because living alone was too painful."

Nathan let out a low whistle. "Sounds intense."

Hari shrugged. "And yet oddly romantic."

"It's morbid," Jess corrected. "This feels too much like Dark Magic."

"It's neither Dark nor Light," Genevieve clarified. "This is magic before it had labels. It's the closest to nature magic can ever be."

Kate could not look at Theo. She didn't want to consider having something that overwhelming with him. She closed her eyes. Of all the rituals in the world and of all the people, it had to be her.

"And this is permanent?"

"Besides the 'togetherness', it'll be the standard 'till death do you part'," Genevieve concluded. "There's no fidelity clause so you could probably still marry other people and have children. You could have completely separate lives if you wanted."

Not that Kate had much plans to marry and have children anytime soon. She was only eighteen for Morgana's sake. She was perfectly content to let Jess get married and continue the LeClair line if it came down to it. Her father had Cathal so it was not like she had some sacred duty to fulfill.

Her long term plan had been to continue with her musical career. Her life shouldn't be affected that much by a magical bond.

***

*Present Day*

Kate gave in and read through Veronica's research. The folder was thick and heavy with pages and pages of information about the ritual Veronica had found. Veronica had spent a lot of time gathering all of this. Someone else would've called it obsessive.

There were letters and printed emails from magical experts and historians that Veronica had consulted. There were notes from case files from people who had attempted the same ritual and failed. There were pages from old grimoires that were so old, the pages were delicate and falling apart. This ritual did date all the way back to Ancient Greece before stories were written down and only shared in the oral tradition.

Somewhere along the way, someone had written down the story but the details had become splintered, changing with each person who retold it. Veronica had collected each version of the tale to comb for the important minutiae that were what stood between success and failure. This was a labor of love. The final instructions for the ritual were rewritten repeatedly until she was finally satisfied.

Veronica had never gotten over Theo's death and had refused to move on. She got to work on bringing him back and hadn't stopped since. It almost scared Kate. This intense need to change fate was something Kate didn't think she could ever possess within her.

Kate read through all the research that night, sacrificing sleep to devour every word. The soul bond was the focal point to everything. She would be Theo's lighthouse back to the land of the living. Without her and the bond, he would continue to be lost.

When Kate looked outside her window and wasn't surprised to find it was already the morning. Kate put on her winter coat, knowing her oversized sweater wouldn't be enough for the early morning chill. She took the thick folder with her and made her way through campus. It was still empty as the school staff had yet to rise to start the day.

Veronica lived in the Merlin dorms with all the other students who majored in law and business. Kate saw a few students who were coming in from a late night or had stayed up like she had around the building. She took the elevator to Veronica's floor and knocked on the door to the other girl's room. She waited for a few moments before the door opened and Veronica's sleepy face appeared.

"Good morning, Katie," Veronica greeted in her husky voice.

Veronica's brown hair was mussed and she was in her pajamas. She leaned against the door frame and stared at Kate with no amount of surprise as if she had been expecting Kate to show up that morning. Maybe she had. Veronica was good at reading people and Kate could never hide herself from the girl's knowing gaze no matter how hard she tried.

Kate handed her the folder and Veronica took it wordlessly, opening it to make sure all the documents were still there. She didn't bother with greeting Veronica back.

"I know you've talked to the coven," Kate said. "Who else has agreed to do the ritual?"

Veronica's smile was almost smug.