War For Love

~Thirty~

"I love a man."

It was new for Siya to hear a man saying he loves another man, romantically. Mehul stood there, uncomfortable, not knowing what was going inside Siya's mind. Would he disgust her, like he disgusted his parents? Fear conjured his heart, gripping his chest so hard that he was finding it hard to breathe. Minutes passed by, so did the hours and days; when in reality the silence had lasted only for a minute or two but it felt like they had been standing there from an hour or so. Finally, ending his misery, Siya looked at him.

"You love a man?" She asked and Mehul nodded his head nervously.

He knew not a lot of people knew that a person can fall in love with the same gender. The idea of a man and woman falling in love had shadowed the fact that a man can also fall in love with another man and a woman can also fall in love with another woman. He took a deep breath, trying once again to explain the concept of love. The last person he tried to explain was his mother and the very next day they were here to get him married to a woman. He deep inside knew it was going to be a futile attempt but he had nothing to lose.

"Just like the way you are in love with that man, I am also in love with a man of your village. I know it..... it sounds weird but same gender love is possible and there's nothing repulsive about it. It's not a sin, it's not wrong. I..... I......" A tear rolled down his eyes unable to speak further and Siya swallowed nervously taking a step forward as she took the a dupatta (scarf) resting on the table to him and he wiped his eyes with it.

"Hey, take deep breaths, okay? Panicking would only make you feel lightheaded. Do you need some water?" Siya asked softly, gently and Mehul shook his head, biting his lips in anxiety. He tried to take deep breaths and it did help him to calm down.

"Are you okay?" She asked and he silently nodded his head, not trusting his voice. "You said you love that man, right?" Siya and he nodded again.

"Hm."

"So you must be loving his soul. His heart and not just his body, right? And Mehul, soul has no gender. Heart has no gender. When we fall in love, we don't fall for how they look or how they walk. We fall in love with how their heart is so full of compassion. We fall for a beautiful soul and not just for a beautiful body. Love has no gender. You may fall in love with a man or a woman and that wouldn't make you inferior than others."

Mehul was taken aback by her words. After years of being made to feel like a criminal for loving someone of his gender, he couldn't believe Siya was alright with him being a gay. His eyes widened and tears pooled his eyes. He didn't knew how to react, silence reigned amid them and Siya felt she had made him feel bad. Guilt and remorse filled her.

"I'm sorry, Mehul, if I made you feel like it's your mistake to fall in love with someone who the society's not going to accept."

"I— I don't disgust you?" His innocent question broke her heart. She swallowed the lump down her throat as she shook her head firmly before looking at him with a smile.

"Do you know, a thousand devotees worship Lord Krishna as their lovers? And those devotees aren't just women but men too. Does that make them gay too? Love is love, Mehul, irrespective of whom you love. You made me realize today that we have only made people believe that love can only happen amid different genders only, forgetting that love doesn't differentiate in gender, religion, caste, creed and any race."

"How ironic it is, Miss Siya that a woman I had never met in my whole life understands me but my own family, living with me since twenty years doesn't want to understand me." Siya smiled at him.

"People find it difficult to understand different. Things will take time, Mehul, but they'll eventually understand. By the way, you said you are in love with the man in my village. Who's he?" Mehul felt his cheeks flushing red at the mention of the man he loves before his heart stuttered inside him painfully.

"But... but he doesn't love me back. Maybe he's not even into men." He said sadly and she rolled her eyes, feeling her mischievous side dominating her mature one.

"Oh come on, you just used the word 'maybe'. That means there's still a probability. And tell me his name now. Maybe I can help you." Mehul licked his lips, heat spreading his cheeks.

"You know him." He said softly and Siya's eyes widened as she looked at him excitedly.

"I know him!? This is not a suspense story, Mehul! Tell me fast!" He chuckled lightly, shaking his head as he looked at her with a shy smile.

"Sahib."

For a second Siya froze, hearing Sahib's name coming out of Mehul. Her eyes widened and her lips parted. How ironic it was that the man Mehul loves is the same man, Siya loves too. But then Siya knew, who wouldn't love Sahib? A man with gold for a heart and an absolute diamond, a gem. She gulped, smiling at him but this time she wasn't sure if she was happy or shocked.

People loved Sahib. And people should love Sahib. And Siya was happy to see that people adored him just like she does. And the man who had sacrificed every last happiness of his life for his country, they should love him until they fill his void. Mehul, however witnessed something in her eyes. So many emotions swirled in her dark eyes and yet he couldn't comprehend any one of them.

"You look.... shocked, Miss Siya. What's the matter?" Siya shook her head, chuckling softly.

"Nothing. You had confessed a truth to me, Mehul and I think it's only fair if I tell you my truth too. Remember the man I told I am in love with?" Siya asked and he nodded his head. "That man is Ru— Sahib."

Mehul felt his fingertips turning cold as his eyes widened and Siya smiled at him, almost sheepishly. She knew it was rather heartbreaking to know that the person you love is already in love with someone else but keeping him from the truth would have been unfair. Immoral. She saw his face twisting painfully and she felt sadness gripping her chest too. Everyone should get their love. One sided love is always so heart-wrenching, so painful and like they say, falling in love isn't fate. But marrying is indeed one's fate.

When Siya started realising that she was falling for Sahib, she didn't stop herself. She didn't want to. Because not getting his love back won't break her because her love was enough to make her love him more. She wasn't expecting much from him. Everyone falls in love once in their life. Our soul chooses its soulmate. But marrying our soulmate is just a matter of fate. She knew.

Siya knew they could love each other till the moon and back. They could make love to each other like no-one ever did. They could sing each other songs and dance on each other's music. They could do everything they desired but the marriage.

She has it all— his soul, his heart, his happiness, his sorrows but she could never have mangalsutra of his name (the sacred wedding locket). She would never be able to put his sindoor (sacred red powder, married women puts on her forehead). She still smiled. The smile that made Mehul to realise that Siya was in pain.

"I'm— I'm really sorry, Miss Siya. I didn't knew." Mehul said, feeling genuinely guilty and Siya shook her head, her smile widening like the void in her chest.

"Don't be sorry. What are you sorry for? Loving Sahib?" He didn't take a second to shake his head firmly. He loves him dearly.

"I'm not sorry for loving Sahib, Miss Siya. I'm sorry to make you sad. And the look your eyes held, I can tell Sahib loves you too. Then what's making you sad, Miss Siya?"

"He does. He loves me dearly, Mehul. But that's the thing making me sad. He's a warrior. He train people to fight and one day, while fighting he'd die. There's no way to even sugar coat this. And for that he doesn't want to name our relation. But I shouldn't be sad, after all, it's the love that matters, right?" He really had nothing to say but her hopeful eyes wanted him to speak something, to console her. She needed it.

"It's your love, Miss Siya, which has changed him so much. You work with him. And I had been following Sahib for a while to know, he didn't always wanted to teach you and yet he did. Maybe your love can change his mind about your marriage."

"Really?" Siya asked, her eyes widening and he sighed.

"I don't know much, Miss Siya. I'm just a blacksmith but what I'm sure about is, nothing is mightier than time. Least expected things happen at the least expected time. My love for Sahib would always be one sided but I'm happy that way. I am happy loving him unconditionally. But I'll pray, I could attend your marriage with Sahib. Maybe seeing you with Sahib would always be my dream more than seeing myself with Sahib."

"You're a man with heart of a gold, Mehul. Can we be friends?" Mehul rose his brows, almost teasingly as his lips curled up in a smile.

"Is this the moment where you'll ask my hand for marriage?"

"And is this the moment you'll agree and cry from ecstasy?" Siya asked instead and after half a minute both started giggling.

"Only if you promise to cook me this kheer again."

"Are you blackmailing me for marriage?" Siya teased him and he rolled his eyes.

"No! I mean, who wouldn't want to marry me, hm?" Mehul asked and Siya for once knew, they won't be sharing a marriage but definitely a beautiful friendship.

~~~~~~~~

"I thought you wouldn't come." Sahib said when Siya walked in his house, really really late. Siya felt a smile surfacing her face as she placed the small earthen pot down, walking closer to him. He had his back facing her when she turned him around to look into his dark, eternal gaze.

"You think, Siya will eat or sleep without feeding her Sahib, hm?"

Sahib's eyes widened at the smile her face held. Her hair were undid. Loose, falling over her chest. The dark coat of kohl in her eyes only enhanced her beauty. This was the second time he saw her without a braid, with her open hair. He was getting lost in her beauty.

"You do know showing your showing your open hair to anyone other than your husband is a crime?" He asked softly, tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear and she closed her eyes as his fingers touched her skin, making her insides to curl and twist.

"Hm? Then you should have known by now, I never followed rules." She said softly and he chuckled, tugging on her strand making her gasp and he cupped her face, pulling her closer to him.

His fingers were hot against her skin, burning her under his ferocious touch. Her hands rested on his chest and she felt her body shrivelling from inside.

"Trust me, I know."

"And if you're going to leave me riled up then leave me now." Sahib chuckled, taking his hands back and she pursed her lips, narrowing her eyes at him but she knew they had to maintain the distance. The distance that left her shivering and yearning for more.

"What's in that pot?" Sahib asked and she bent down the pot, opening its lid before she turned to Sahib.

"I brought you kheer." He rose his brows, feeling the delicious aroma of the sweet flooding his senses.

"Kheer? Is it something special today?"

"Oh, yes. My sister's and my marriage got fixed."