Keeping Secrets

Chapter Four

F o u r:

F l o r e n c e:

The music was pumping loudly from Charlotte's stereo in her bedroom as we both got ready for the party. Saturday had arrived and Charlotte eventually convinced me to go, she could be so persuasive sometimes.

She put half of her long, dark hair into a ponytail on the top of her head with a velvet scrunchie and walked over to the stereo to higher up the dance music. Her parents were going to be gone for the whole night so we didn't care if anyone could hear us or not.

"What's with the music?" I raised a brow at her. I didn't mind listening to it but it wasn't her usual style. She always listened to rock or alternative bands from before we were even born.

"It's my getting ready music. You like?" she wiggled her eyebrows and began moving her hips in her acid wash overalls. She always had this grunge nineties look going on and personally I loved it. I wasn't as stylish as Charlotte though, I couldn't pull it off, and I wore what I felt like wearing one the day I woke up instead of dressing in the name of fashion. I didn't necessarily have a bad fashion sense, but I wouldn't say it was really that good either. I wore a chunky knitted burgundy dress that clung to my hips nicely, some ripped tights and a pair of Nike sneakers. My hair was messy in loose waves that hung just below my shoulders and my makeup was minimal. I had just filled in my brows and coated my long lashes lightly with mascara.

We danced around happily for a minute or two and then began getting ready again. I put on some earrings and bangles and was ready to go. We walked to the party, it only being a few minutes' away and arrived just after ten. The house was already filled with people and music was pumping loudly from inside as we stepped foot on the lawn in front of his house. There were a few people scattered around but it wasn't as busy as the house when we finally stepped in.

I was surprised at the crowds of people. I'd never spoke to this many people before in my life, how did Evan invite so many of them? Charlotte grabbed my hand and began guiding us towards the kitchen to get a drink. Evan, Eric and Mick were there, Eric sitting on the counter telling a story animatedly while the other two watched and listened very carefully. Evan's eyes then wandered to us and he smiled at Charlotte, motioning us to come over. Oh god, I thought, I'd rather not. I walked hesitantly over with her.

"Hey." She called when we were nearly beside them.

"Glad you could make it Charlotte and um..."

"Florence." I tried to smile at him. He brought Charlotte in for a tight hug before letting his gaze fall over her body.

"Well don't forget to grab a drink, there's plenty here." He spoke loudly over the music and motioned to the fridge and the counter lined with spirits. We had already started drinking at Charlotte's house but we weren't drunk yet. "These are my friends Mick," he pointed at Mick who kept a bored expression on his face, "And Eric." He then pointed at Eric, I smiled at him but he didn't smile back.

"Hey." Eric waved unenthusiastically, "Anyway." he said, being kind of dismissive like he wanted to go back to his conversation. Fine then... I thought.

"Let's go Charlotte." I said, picking up two cups and filling them with mixer. I then led her straight through the kitchen to the living room where everyone was dancing and the music was the loudest. We took our drink out and poured it in our cups. I was annoyed at eve just the thought of Eric right then, I knew we would have to pretend like we were strangers but he didn't need to be so rude back there. I shouldn't let him get to me but I did.

I drank the whole drink in one, maybe the vodka would help me loosen up a little. We danced for a bit, with me continuing to take swigs of the vodka straight that I had brought with me every minute or two until it was almost gone.

My mind began to get a little fuzzy and all I wanted to do was just dance to the thumping music that was surrounding me, filling my ears. I felt a bit dizzy and Charlotte noticed this right away, and I was about to take another sip of my drink when she stopped me.

"Whoa slow down Florence, we've only been here an hour. You need to pace yourself." She looked worried.

"You wait here while I grab you some water. Don't drink anymore." I nodded and smiled at her but as soon as she left I drank the last little bit I had left and made my way out to the back garden were there was more music playing. I saw Eric sitting on the stairs with Chloe, a girl from his grade. Their faces were close together and they seemed to be flirting with each other. He never saw me and I quickly walked all the way outside now. There was a lot more people out here than the crowded living room so I decided to stay out for a while.

I moved my body to the beat of the music, trying to get my mind off of Eric, Chloe and the hurt I felt because of it. I knew we weren't an item, I knew he wasn't mine and I knew we could both be with other people because of this but I just didn't expect to be so upset by it.

I honestly didn't know why I was doing this but the thought never stopped me at the time I moved into the middle of the crowd and danced. I was usually a little shy and just so quiet in crowds of people but right now, I could care less as I dancing surrounded by everyone. A pair of hands rested on my waist as someone began to dance with me. We were all so close together and when I turned around I was surprised to see Kane, a jock from my year grinning at me and dancing.

"You can really move Florence." He said as we both got more into it. How does he know my name? I thought, he's never even spoke to me before, no one knows my name.

"I Wish I could say the same about you." I flirted back and winked at him. We moved closer to each other, our bodies touching slightly when we danced. I turned around with my back to him and swayed my hips with the music. His hands had now lowered from my waist to my hips. He whispered in my ear and kissed my neck. I didn't really care what I was doing, if Eric could do whatever he liked, so could I. We were moving together, even closer than before if that was possible when a hand grabbed mine and dragged me away from him. I looked up to see a very pissed off Eric staring back between me and Kane.

"Get your hands off of her." He growled.

"Hey man, we were in the middle of something." Kane replied, starting to get annoyed then too.

"Well not anymore." He said before leading me farther away from Kane. I didn't attempt to go back because of the look Eric had given me. We were around the side of the house now, it was empty and dark.

"What the hell were you doing back there?" he was really angry now.

"What did it look like? I was dancing." I tried not to slur my words.

"You know what I mean." He glared at me. I rolled my eyes and turned around, beginning to make my way back to the garden.

"Where are you going?" he took my arm again. I turned around and looked at him, he seemed more concerned than angry now.

"I'm going back to dance with Kane, because Kane isn't afraid to talk to me in public." I crossed my arms. I knew that was I was probably being a b***h right now but I didn't care. His eyes lost their hardness at my words and he didn't speak for what felt like minutes.

"Whatever Flo. Why don't you just go back to Kane then?" Didn't he just stop me from going back to Kane? He sounded really hurt but at that point in time, I didn't care, I was sick of caring.

"Why don't you just go back to Chloe?" I shot back. It was like the penny had finally dropped in his mind.

"What's that supposed to mean?" he narrowed his eyes but he knew what I meant.

"I saw you two on the stairs."

"Don't be so jealous Flo."

"Me? Jealous?!" I threw my hands up in the air. "You have to be kidding me, I wouldn't waste my time. I'm not the one who walked in and stopped what was happening now was I?" I squinted at him. We never fought before, this was so weird. Was I jealous? No, I couldn't be. I was just angry at myself for being so stupid and never thinking about him being with other girls because I had never even thought of anyone else since we started this not-a-relationship relationship with him. He hadn't got anything else to say because he knew I was right, so I started walking away again.

"Look I'm sorry, I just- I don't know. I just..."

"You just what?" I turned around and looked at him.

"Nothing, I shouldn't have gotten jealous." He admitted.

"Exactly, because we aren't a couple, we are both allowed to do whatever we want."

"Yes, I know." It looked like the words were painful coming out of his mouth but they shouldn't be, I wasn't the one that was so keen on not having a relationship. "Just because I don't want to go out with you doesn't mean I don't care about you Flo." He looked so vulnerable standing in front of me then. I didn't know what to say, my eyes widened slightly at his words. Was he drunk? He didn't seem drunk to me. He had moved closer, ducking down so his face was neared to mine and he was looking me straight in the eye. He gulped before sayings "Please, just don't go back there to him. Stay with me." I still couldn't find the words to speak and my temper had calmed down. All I could do was nod slightly at him before he took my hand and led me inside again. I was trying my best not to fall because I felt dizzier than ever in that moment. Soon enough just like Charlotte had a few moments ago, Eric noticed this clearly.

"Are you okay?" he looked at me quizzically; there was a hint of humor in his voice as he tried to hide a smile.

"Perfect." I grinned at him.

"You're drunk." He chuckled. "C'mon, let's get you a glass of water." We ended up in the kitchen. I wondered where Charlotte was I hadn't seen her in a while now, maybe she was with Evan. Eric handed me the glass of water and I threw it over my shoulder, pretending to drink it , at first he laughed. But it was all over the floor and I couldn't control my giggling now, Eric got some paper towels to clean it up and while he was on the ground I grabbed a bottle of something from the counter and ran.

I heard Eric call after me but he was too late, I was mixed into the crowd. I was dancing and twirling around, swigging from the bottle and wincing every time at the taste, I made my way around the large house. It's so much bigger than my house, it's decorated nicely too. It was as big as Eric's house, maybe Evan's mom and dad were fancy lawyers too. Or maybe not. I made my way up the stairs, it was empty up here. God the carpet looks so soft, I bent down and touched the white carpet, it was even softer than I imagined. Maybe Evan won't mind if I just lie on it for a while, I thought. And without even noticing, I drifted off to sleep.