The King's Queen

CHAPTER 1

All I know is something— a piece of me is missing, and I can’t even name what it is.

But that isn’t something so simple. . . because it feels like that missing piece has played a significant role in my life because I reached this place. It was as if I’m incomplete without it. . . no, it’s more than that.

And deep inside me, it’s telling me that it has something to do with why I couldn’t remember everything, including my name.

“Zane, my dear. Come here,”

From washing the dishes in front of me, I overlooked to the one who called me. It’s Mother Imelda, the one who’s lending me their roof even though I don’t know who I really am.

I smiled and approached her while wiping my hand on the skirt of my dress. The floor is creaking every time I’m walking on it, which indicates how old this cabin house is already; however, even though it’s made from the oak trees that could be seen everywhere in this place, especially in the forest, it’s still sturdy that could be lived for in years. The whole area was made from trees that Father Isko built for himself when they were still young and healthy, according to Mother Imelda, which, every time I think of it, I couldn’t help but be amazed.

Indeed, this house has contained more memories inside. . . in which I couldn’t help but envy it a little.

And once I’m in front of her, I gently get her hand and placed the back of her palm on my forehead as a sign of respect. At the same time, I was about to take the things she’s carrying when she stopped me by shaking her head.

Her light brown eyes and hair reflect the eyes of the sisters I’ve treated as biological ones in those years I’ve been living here. Father Francisco has dark-colored hair and dark eyes that their children didn’t get. However, the majority of his features were inherited by Mathilde and Martha—their daughters.

Mother Imelda looks at me with concern underneath her warm expression. Indeed, she’s so kind that even they have nothing left already, she always wanted to help the other people, and that’s what makes my heart melt, that I would do everything to help them.

“My dear… no. I just wanted to talk to you about something,” She said that it made me look at her with a questioning stare—with forehead creased and right now, I know that my face shows too much confusion right now. Indeed, the way she’s looking at me brought nervousness in my being. However, I tried to show her that it’s nothing, as I faced her with a brave expression.

“What it is about, Mother?” I asked her gently, and yeah, she’s the one who insisted that I should call her mother because she badly wanted to have a daughter who will help them with their house chores. Mathilde is still young since she’s still in her fourth year in high school. And based on Mother Imelda, she’s the hope of this family— to finally get out of this kind of living. That’s why she’s doing everything so she could study the way she needs. They tried again after Mathilde, however, she’s having a hard time giving birth back then until they almost gave up, but now, they’ve been blessed with a cute little girl—Martha.

“Ma, I’ll be going to school now!” We all looked at the one who spoke. It’s Martha, the cute little girl I was talking about just now. She’s about seven years old, and yeah, she’s a miracle child. Mathilde is sixteen right now; however, I know that she still has more to learn regarding living in this world. As of now, I was the only one which they could lean on.

She approached us and did the same thing I did to Mother Imelda—placing the back of her palm to her forehead as a sign of respect while she tiptoes to kiss me on the cheek. I smiled at her cuteness and stopped myself from pinching her cheeks but failed since I just found myself doing it gently. She giggles as her cheeks reddened before she looks at me, and her big light brown eyes are shining with admiration while looking at me.

She’s charming.

“Take care, Martha!” I said as I smiled at her before I slowly waved my hand.

I’m still kind of worried that she might go home with a bunch of bruises again, yet I’ve already reported it to their school chancellor, and they said they’ll do something about it. But I still couldn’t stay still because I have a hunch that they’ll just let it go again. . . as the usually goes. After all, those girls who bully Martha are the daughter of wealthy families.

“Of course, sister Zane!” She smiled, waving at me as she walked backward before she quickly ran with her friends—the friends with the same status as we are. . . the ones living in the same area with us, on the rural side of this kingdom.

We are living at the place where government. . . or let me say, the monarchy has turned their back on us— which is what Mother Imelda told me before. But based on her, ever since I’ve come to their place, the blessings slowly appeared as if I’m the goddess who causes it.

She told me that there wouldn’t be enough food to be spare to this place before I came, since those higher people always took them for their personal lives, making those higher than them believe that they’re equally distributing those goods even though they actually did not. Sometimes, they’re only hiding those goods and sell those to these people who couldn’t afford to buy those goods. Still, they don’t choose since their family would die in hunger if they didn’t buy it.

And those kinds of people suck the most. They’re the cruelest creature for me. Humans indeed are ruthless.

I sighed as I look at Mother Imelda, who remained looking for me. I am really fond of this family even though they are not my relatives, nor blood-related. Based on the story of Mother Imelda, Father Isko, short for Francisco, only saw me in the forest when they were hunting. And because of their kindness, they took me to their home without even second thoughts, which is where I am now. Who has the right mind to do it, right? I might be an evil witch and would only bring misfortune to them, yet they didn’t think of it and instead, let me live in their house for years, until today.

That’s right. They are not my birth parents. But even so, I consider them to be birth parents as well because they gave me a place to sleep and raised me well even though they did not know me and that I’m a stranger to their lives.

“The King heard that you were singing here with us, so he decided to take you to the upcoming festival.” There, Mom got my attention as my eyes widened and my heart almost jumped from what I heard. What the f**k?

“Is it true?” I asked, wondering. And right now, I don’t know what to feel.

In the remaining years, I’ve spent, I have never been out of this place. I was just up the street in front of our home, and yeah, I sang to help our livelihood, to help the people living here because yeah, we aren’t the only ones who are unfortunate, but everyone here. Especially since it’s all that I could think of to give back for what they’ve done to me, especially for letting me live in their place even though they don’t know me.

“Yes, dear. I can’t refuse the King, so instead, I said I would want to hear your decision first. ” She says weakly as if she’s guilty of what had happened when it’s not her fault at all. I took a deep breath.

In my past years in this kingdom, I already know a lot about it.

First, if it’s the King’s order, you’re not allowed to say no. All orders herein must be complied with.

Second, you are not allowed to break the laws. Women are always inferior to men. If what they would ask for you to do, and if you are just a mere woman and have no rank in this kingdom, you should follow them.

Third, low living status should remain low. Do not dream of dominating the superiors. If possible, stay lowering your head as they pass because if ever you caught their attention, it’ll be the end of your life.

Fourth, it is forbidden to say no to superiors, just as it is prohibited to say no to the King. Because otherwise, you will taste the punishment—slavery.

And fifth, don’t let yourself get caught up in high rankings because you will have a hard time getting out of there.

 I tried to lift my face and show that it’s good news. . . even it’s not. “Mom, that’s good too. I know that performers were being paid an amount of money for festivals, right? Even I haven’t witnessed more from it, I’m sure that’s a lot of money too. We can also breathe easily and live for years if I accept that. ” I said with a smile, even though in my heart, I was really nervous.

I wasn’t even in favor of this society, where women are slaves of men, which they thought, is an instrument of their hunger. There was no equality in this society; today’s life is very unfair for us, women. So if possible, I will not let Mother Imelda socialize with the nobles, especially since I don’t remember who I am and where I came from. That’s equivalent to punishment since I know that my existence here wasn’t really recorded. I’m still an alien to this kingdom.

And yes, my only memory is that my name Zane — also because of the necklace I was wearing with a minimal name engraved on it. And because I did not know my last name, they even named me Mother Imelda after their name.

Zane François.

Yes. I am Zane François, a girl with an empty heart and mind— as I couldn’t name what’s missing within me. I’ve known that I lost all the memories I have and that I won’t stop until I remember everything.

“But Zane… my daughter…” I came back to reality when I heard Mom’s voice. I looked at her and halted when I saw her teary eyes. “Even though I am not your blood relative, I consider you my own child, and I do not want anyone to be bad to you, to hurt you, especially since you know what is happening to those who belong to the nobility as their slaves,” I felt my heart soften at what she said. Still, I also felt sad because of it. I couldn’t help myself, I hugged her and leaned my head on her head.

 “Don’t worry about me, I can handle myself,” I spoke for her comfort; even though I was anxious for what’s about to happen, I tried to hide it with a smile.

Yeah, just smile..

“What if they choose you? That is not impossible, my dear. You are so beautiful, and I am afraid they will just make you a toy because of it, ” I saw tears dripping from her eyes. I bit my lower lip. If I only knew this would happen, I would not just go out of the house to sing.

 I know what happens to those who fit in with the nobility; even I can not help feeling sad because of it. Once you are chosen to be one of their servants, your dignity, as well as who you are, you have to throw it away and serve them in whatever they want you to become. That is, if you are told to kiss their feet, you must do so without questioning their command. If you are told to undress in front of a crowd, you must undress.

That’s how cruel this society is.

I could not answer Mom because of the lack of words. I know that even if I say a few more comforting words, that will not be good, especially if fear has eaten someone’s heart.

I took a deep breath as I walked to the nearest grocery store here. Because Mathilde, Martha’s older sister, is not there and she is still at school—she’s in her fourth year in high school, so I just took this job. After all, I wasn’t doing anything anymore because I was done with my chores.

 There is a thin colored cloth covering my face that I always wear every time I go out. Most of the people here are wearing the same thing — especially since it is hot in this area, and they also do not want to show the beauty they have to avoid being noticed by the nobles and avoid being enslaved by them.

After all, being their servant means hell.

 “Hey! Just as I thought I would see you here again. ” My chest throbbed quickly when I heard that deep voice. I lowered my head, but the owner of that voice even went in front of me. “Why do you always bow down in front of me? It’s just me, Zane; loosen up!” He laughed, yet I could imagine him with his forehead creasing in confusion.

“Uhm… excuse me, Nikolaus,” I said in a low voice as I continued lowering my head.  My chest throbbed fast, especially every time I was seen with him because people would always look at us as if it’s wrong to befriend someone who’s a wealthy merchant. I’m feeling so nervous!

“Wait, Zane… why are you always lowering your head?” I lifted my face a little, but he quickly reached for my chin and gently lifted it as my eyes widened when my eyes met his soft features, who’s looking at me with concern and slight annoyance on his face. “There. You’re so beautiful, but why won’t you let others see it?”

I quickly shook his hand over my face and lowered my head again. I am… not comfortable with what he just did. He paused for a moment as if he was shocked by what I did too before I heard him sighed heavily.

“Sorry.” He says in full of sincerity. I shook my head.

“It’s okay…” I answered in such a low voice while I remained looking at my feet.

“Anyway, are you going to market? I’ll come with you. ” The arrogance returned to him, and when I glanced at him again, there was the sign of his grin that he always showed not only to me but also to other people.

Truly, Nikolaus is handsome with his boyish smirk. It often in this place, and I always see him every time I sing on the street around our house. He has this fair soft skin, his light brown shiny hair, and everything about his looks shouts royalty, but his clothes say otherwise.

They say that you can see a person's nobility based on his actions, dress and movements. But based on his movement, and the way he carries himself, he’s far from them… that he is only a wealthy merchant, that’s the opinion of people around him in our place.

But my opinions differ from what they say. Every time I look at him, all I could see in him was a prince who tried to run away from his kingdom. So even if they say I should be comfortable here, I can’t, especially as much as I can, I want to avoid those like them. . . nobles and monarchy. And so, I will never be comfortable with him until he proves that he is not a noble that I always avoid.

 “Zane?” I quickly turned to him when he spoke. No, I was still lowering my head when I faced him before I heard him sigh and say. “I’m telling you, I’m not one of them. At least, I’m far from them…” His voice weakened at the last thing he said. Still, that didn’t convince me to remove my cover and smile at him without reasonable restrictions.

 Indeed, he accompanied me shopping until I got home. This is not new to me. He also entered our home several times because Mom invited him every time she would reach him. It’s just like now that we have dinner together while around the wooden table and in the front there are dishes prepared by Mom herself.

Nikolaus is busy throwing jokes with my sisters— not blood-related. Mathilde got home from school when I was on the grocery, while I was glad that Martha got home without bruises and such. Mom, on the other hand, laughs while Dad goes along with it. I was the only one who was quiet and remained eating still, not joining their talks but answer only when they’re asking me.

Until Mother Imelda noticed how badly I wanted to finish my food in front of me.

“Zane… don’t rush the food,” She said to me that I halted. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw the gradual disappearance of a smile on Nikolaus’ lips.

I bit my lower lip as I feel guilty. “I’m sorry,” I spoke and remained lowering my head. I slowly put down my utensil as I sighed.

I heard the guest coughed to get our attention. “Ah, Ma’am, Sir, I’m leaving. Sorry for the inconvenience,” He said and quickly stood up. I heard a moan of protest from Martha as I remained not looking at them.

“Are you sure, son? You haven’t finished eating your food,” Mom was worried and in my peripheral vision, she glanced at me. I bowed even more.

 “Yes, thank you for the food. I’m leaving… Zane.” I looked at him for a moment before nodding. He smiled at me before starting to walk, which Mom quickly accompanied him going out of our house.

I heard Dad sighed once they are out of our sight.

“Zane, I know Nikolaus is not a noble, most importantly, not a monarchy, if that’s what you think.” Dad’s speech made me unable to answer. Truly, I was uncomfortable, especially with the kind of topic we are having right now. But what can I do?  That’s what my brain says. I sighed.

“I’m sorry, Dad,” I whispered.

“He should be the one you’re asking for forgiveness,” He said, and in his voice, I know he’s disappointed in me.

I no longer know what I should do about it. This is just an addition to the problem I am facing right now.