Never Again

Chapter 2 – The Irony of Time

It was exactly 1:15 p.m. I didn’t know how many times I looked at the time. I touched my watch. My dad gave this to me as present. He told me that it will always remind me it’s time to go home. It was the same watch I had in my wrist this morning. It stopped ticking twenty years ago, but I still wore it.

If I did not miss the bus, I would have had the time to eat lunch and be on time for my part-time job. If my future still exists, Mrs. Fritz must be angry by now. She has an appointment at two, and I had to babysit and tutor her two children.

Thinking I was daydreaming, which was quite true, Mr. Maurice called my name.

"Miss Rivera," He called making some of my classmates giggled.

I stood up, unsure of what to do.

Do I have to stand?

It has been years – almost four decades - since I went to college.

"You seem to know the lesson very well. You're no longer paying attention." He sounded disappointed. "Care to explain the difference of needs and wants?"

I almost raised my eyebrows. I was glad I didn’t. That was an easy peasy question. As a regular student, I might have fainted by just being called, but this was like a piece of cake for me.

"A need is a necessity or essential items we need to live. For example food, water, and shelter. Want, on the other hand, is something unnecessary but we desire them or we think these items could increase our quality of living like designer clothes, smartphones-"

"Smartphones?"

I bit my lower lip and thought of an answer immediately. "1992. We had the Simon by IBM, sir," I answered, but I wasn't exactly sure of the name. All I remember, it was the first smartphone that came out in 1992 and with its monochrome feature, it was still tacky. Even flipped phones went out in the market in 1996, which would be next year. I suddenly missed my touchscreen phone. It wasn't new but it was better having it now than having no phone at all. I was surprised we all survive without much technology now.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, sir." I was confident with my answer. That was the last project I did for Mrs. Fritz's daughter. We had to make an infographic of the evolution of smartphones.

"Explain why this smartphone affects the wants of customers?"

"That's because we never get contented," I answered. I saw him furrowed his forehead. "I mean, simply because of dissatisfaction, sir."

Can I sit down now? But then, he made a follow-up question. I shouldn't have answered smartphone. It was giving me trouble now.

His looks wanted to say I have to explain more.

"Who among us has a telephone at home?" I looked around. My classmates raised their hands. I nodded in recognition of their cooperation, then I faced him. "I think we all wanted to have handheld phones. IBM Simon weighs half a kilo," I smiled. “Who would like to carry that, right? We want something lighter that we can put in our purse or bag."

Where was Jobs anyway? He should be the one explaining this to Mr. Maurice, not me. He's very much alive at this time, though he hasn't come back to Apple yet. He was busy co-producing Toy Story movie. I shook my head with disbelief. There were three Toy Story movies already in my time.

"You're daydreaming, Miss Rivera." Mr. Maurice said, also shaking his head.

I smiled. "I guess sir. Because at this moment, I am dreaming of a phone as thin as this," I held my calculator. "which I could type not with keys but touchscreen, and a phone that would put my documents, books, projects, and use them anywhere, anytime, and most importantly, a phone that I could listen to music like an mp3. Errr... walkman, I mean. and use it as a camera." I gestured taking a selfie which made everyone laugh.

Can I sit now? I was scared I'd have another slip of the tongue about the future.

He nodded, not because he heard my plea but it's already time.

"We'll continue this discussion next meeting." He said briefly, then gathered his stuff and went out of the classroom.

I sighed in relief as I sat down on the chair. Everybody, including Jane, did the opposite.

"Don't just sit there, sleepyhead," Jane said jokingly as she pulled my arms.

I groaned. "Where to now?"

"Time for our next class. Let's go change."

I just followed her and headed to change to our PE uniform. These were the days when physical education was still part of the curriculum in college.

"You're weird today," Jane told me as we headed to the next building.

I stayed quiet. I felt like my head was going to explode.

"But you were great there." she smiled and then suddenly, she giggled. "Selene, I'm really excited for our next class."

“What’s to be excited about?” I asked as I concentrate on the pavement. It was only now that I noticed its criss cross pattern.

“I heard from Vaughn we have cute guys in our PE class.” Jane, three steps ahead of me, stopped and looked back. "You forgot something?"

I wish I could say yes. How could I forget? Today was a significant day for me because this was the first time I met Albert. I shook my head and continued to walk. I could hardly breath as we entered the room.

Unlike other classrooms, there were no chairs in PE rooms. Students were supposed to sit on the floor. I went straight to my favorite spot, near the window, near the blackboard, then sat on the cold floor. Jane just followed me, but after a while she got busy talking with another student.

I glanced at the time and counted. Ten... nine... eight... seven... six... five... four... three...two... and just as it was. After I counted one, a group of elite students went inside. We all looked in their direction as they sat on the other side of the room. But my eyes were glued to the door. Albert, young and looking incredibly handsome even in his PE uniform, went inside.

It was like the first time. There were butterflies in my stomach. My heart skipped a beat. I couldn't take my eyes off him, and for a short moment, he met my eyes, and just like before, he ignored me. He went and joined his friends.

In the past, I mean, in my timeline, this was a special day for me. I remember how he would steal glances at me. I remember how my heart went gaga when our PE instructor partnered me with him in the getting-to-know activity. It was the day I realized that it was love at first sight. What a fool!

I was too absorbed with my thoughts when Jane elbowed me. She was smiling and whispered. "My god Selene, he's staring at you." She was a bit thrilled with what she was seeing.

"Who?"

"That gorgeously handsome guy." she smiled and pointed him secretly.

I turned in the direction she pointed and saw Albert staring at me. I raised my eyebrows but did not smile. I also gazed at him as if we were in a staring contest. His best friend, Ed, whispered something on him, making him drop his gaze.

Our old, bald and gay instructor finally came. He was wearing that familiar white polo shirt, tucked in his brown jogging pants. He was swaying like he was dancing as he went to the front.

"Good moooorning!" he said cheerily. "Place your class cards here my darling students." As he instructed, he gave me the box and the other box to the other side. Excitement was visible in everyone's face, except me. I guess this was the disadvantage of knowing the future.

He introduced himself first and explained that the activity was to get to know each other. He picked one card from our box, and one from the other. It was awkward for some, but they excitedly got up from their seats and joined their partner.

"Selene and Albert." He called.

I saw Jane pressed her lips but did not say anything.

As I was about to stand, he was there in front of me already and saw him held his hand to me. I did not take it. He just smiled and faced our instructor.

"That person will be your partner for this whole semester. Remember the name, remember the face. You must know your partner very well." He instructed.

I sighed. I wish I could tell him I knew my partner very well. It's not like I was still interested to know.

"Hi," It sounded like a question than a greeting. He seemed unsure now on how to approach me.

"Hi." I said briefly.

"I'm Albert."

I just nodded. "Selene."

It was quiet for a while. What I really wanted to do right now was hurt him. I hate him. No, I despise him. The one I hated was myself for falling in love with him.

"Wow, this is really awkward." He smiled as he brushed his hair with his fingers.

I hate it when he does that. My heart wanted to pop out of my chest because of excitement in seeing him again.

We were quiet again. He looked at me with great interest and annoyance.

Jane and Ed were getting along well. Maybe if someone could hear my thoughts, they would probably say, I'm a spoiler. This was actually the beginning of their love story. In the future, they got married and had three wonderful children.

They were laughing at something and so focused on each other that when Ed stepped backward, he hit my back accidentally.

I lost my balance and tripped over my bag. Albert caught me but he did not expect that I would want to escape his touch. He also lost his balance making us both falling to the floor, and making me land on top of him. My heart stopped beating for a second then beat wildly as we both stared at each other.

I swallowed hard as I felt the jolt of electricity flowing from our bodies. I could not believe he still has the same effect on me. I suddenly had the urge to touch his chiseled face.

"Hi there beautiful," He uttered, almost a whisper. "Are you okay?"

I heard someonce cleared his throat. I blinked. I tried to wake up from this nightmarish experience, but my heart seemed to think otherwise.

As I raised my head, I blushed, seeing everyone staring at us. I smiled wryly and turned to Albert who was smiling sheepishly at me. I scowled at him and stood up immediately.

Jane and Ed went to us hurriedly, and while my friend was all smiling, I made a face. She laughed and then mouthed sorry.

"Are you okay?" This time it was our instructor who asked. He helped Albert stand up, but he was talking to me.

I nodded but my cheeks were all red. I was too embarrassed.

“All is well, then,” he said, clapping his hand. “Position everyone,”

I furrowed my forehead. I was too focused on us that I didn’t hear what position that was.

“Close dance hold,” Albert seemed to understand my confusion. He offered his hand.

I gulped. I saw others excitedly did the closed position as instructed to us. I was not just sure if I could do it. My hands were sweating and the throbbing pain in my chest was making me dizzy.

“This is a very important dance position. You and your partner need to be comfortable with each other,” our instructor explained as he roam around the room correcting the position of his students.

Trembling, I accepted his hand. Of all positions, why this have to be the basic?

Albert led the instruction. He placed my left hand it on his right upper arm, and rested his right hand on my back. I stiffened. I couldn’t breath. I felt like this body contact was choking me.

He pulled me closer to him and whispered, “Relax, Selene. I’m not gonna bite you,”

I looked down, but then he touched my chin and slowly lifted my face. Our eyes met again.

"Trust me, I will never do something to hurt you."

Awww... that was sweet. I wanted to punch him in the face. He has no idea how hurt I was right now. The pain was excruciating and no matter how sweet he is at this time, I know he will hurt me and destroy my future.

"Can we, at least, be friends?"

I sneered but I couldn't help staring at him. For more than thirty years, I have never forgotten his handsome face, his eyes, and the smile that swept my feet away.

As my mind was determined to change my future, my heart is begging me to take another shot. Hoping it might change now.

I guess this is the irony of time traveling. No matter how you change your future, the effect would still be the same. My heart is falling for him again. But then, I remember what the homeless guy told me.

Beware of falling debris.