Out of time

I know you

Once me and Sierra had left my dad to deal with my mother’s outburst, Si had walked with me in silence till the restaurant was no longer visible. When it became apparent to her that I wasn’t going to speak on my own, she took my hand carefully in hers and asked me what she could do to help? To which I had instructed her to get a drink in my hand, any drink in my hand as fast as possible. That request is the reason we are now sat in a place called Micky’s. A grubby little dive bar not too far away from where we had been eating. It had certainly not been on Sierra’s approved list of places to take me tonight but let’s be honest the night wasn’t exactly going the way I had planned it anyway.

The minute we entered I sat down on the closet seat available, which happened to be situated at the bar. It turned out to be a good choice – quicker access to the bartender. I ordered two beers and was now part way through my second as Sierra nursed her first. I could see Sierra looking at me concerned out of the corner of my eye. I sighed finally looking at her for the first time since we entered.

‘You know if I wanted a sober person to stare at me and watch me swallow every last sip of beer I would have stayed with my mother.’ She looked at me with fake hurt plastered on her face.

‘I can’t believe you just compared me to your mother’ she smiled finally starting to drink more of her beer. I couldn’t help but laugh a little. Once Si saw that I was feeling a little better she continued to swallow down more and more of her beer until it was all gone. I looked at her in amazement.

‘Wow. There is the drinking pro Marc has been telling me about for as long as I can remember.’

‘Well I need to catch up, your two drinks ahead of me’ she said giving me a nudge, ‘anyway speaking of Marc, he is going to wonder where the hell we are. We were supposed to meet him at the Ram’s at half past eight.’

‘Who knew my mother could drag a dinner out for over four hours, what time even is it now?’

‘It’s ten O’ Clock, pubs are only open for another hour if we want to stay out after that will have to head further into town and hit the clubs.’

‘Wow ten already, I’m almost officially eighteen’ I mocked doing a rather bad impression of my mother.

‘Oh yeah what time did you say that was again?’ Si asked looking at her watch once more.

‘I can’t remember exactly what minute it was but about ten past’ I said the last part a bit louder than intended. I think the third beer I was now polishing off was starting to take effect.

‘You sure you are feeling alright Jen?’

‘Oh God Si, stop acting like my mother and have some fun with me! It’s my eighteenth for god sake’ I said again a bit louder than intended.

After finishing off my fourth beer I began to have a bit of a head ache,

‘My head hurts’ I said out loud not realising I hadn’t said it in my head. Si looked at me then at her watch again.

‘hmm maybe you should slow down Jen, I know you’ve had a s**t birthday but you are drinking them rather fast.’

‘Si I can handle ......’ I stopped speaking mid sentence as I was interrupted by a shooting pain through my head, my vision became blurry. I tried to focus on Sierra’s face but another came into focus a males, he had precious olive toned skin and freckles that lay on his cheeks only visible to the eye when in close proximity to his face. I tried to run my hand through his thick black hair but felt nothing as my view came back into focus. Sierra was sat looking at me concerned as she watched my hand try to caress thin air.

‘Jen what’s going on?’

‘Nothing!’ I scrunched my eyes shut as the males face came into view again.  My eyes locked with his deep intense brown orbs. He told me he loved me, it was barely a whisper but I heard it.

‘John’ I spoke the name lingering on my lips, who was he?

‘John? Jenny who’s John’ I looked at her a little taken back, had I said that out loud. I shook my head at her taking another sip of beer, my vision lost focus again. I trembled looking down at my hands they were smeared with blood, my rapid breathing increasing, my head feeling lighter as I struggled to force my breath back to a normal pace. What is happening to me? I shook my head and focused on Sierra but it was mere seconds before I saw the man again, this time it was different his skin looked paler his completion all clammy. I stared at his face as the light faded from his eyes. I closed his lids which were a shade darker than the rest of his skin, brushed my finger over his thick long lashes – ‘NO!’

‘Right that’s it Jennifer we are getting you out of here’ I looked up at her, her face coming back into focus. I looked around the room realising people were staring at me. I cleared my throat,

‘I just need...’ I didn’t even bother finishing my sentence as I ran to the bathroom. I could feel Sierra close behind me but I managed to get in and lock the door before she could come in behind me.

‘Jennifer open the door’ she smacked it hoping it would open

‘I just need a minute’ I placed both my hands on the sink for support and looked into the dirty smeared mirror at my reflection. I looked awful! I ran the cold tap hoping to cool myself down as I rubbed some of the water on the back of my neck. Just as I caught my eye in the mirror again, his face started to return, I stared at his long thick lashes that were really unfair for a man to posses and held my fingers out to try and trace his beautiful soft plump pink lips.  

Sierra banging on the door dragged me back into my surroundings. Who was this man?

‘Right that’s it Jen, I’m ringing a taxi, we’re leaving! Just stay there I will be back in a minute. I listened as her footsteps grew further away. Once I was sure the hallucinations had stopped I left the bathroom stall, I saw Si over by the bar borrowing the phone. I felt hot and wanted to grab some fresh air, so I snuck past Si and decided to wait for her outside. I wouldn’t be hard to find once she realised I was no longer in the toilets.

I sat on the step of the pub watching people pass by. I loved to people watch, to imagine their back stories – who they were and what they were doing. I always used it to pass the time when I became bored. I watched a woman further down the road arguing with someone, she had long straight hair with a centre parting and wore a bright pink halter to that did nothing for her completion. I imagined the man she was arguing with to be her boyfriend, they were arguing because she has had food in her teeth for the last half an hour and he hadn’t told her. I burst out laughing finding myself hysterical – maybe I’m more drunk than I thought! I started looking around for my next victim that’s when I noticed a familiar face across the street saying goodbye to a group of people.

Another hallucination threatened to obstruct my vision, this time all I sore was a set of eyes, piercing eyes that felt as though they could see into your soul. When my focus returned I stood up to get another look at the familiar face, they turned towards me sticking their arm out to flag down a taxi. I gasped as I got a better look at their face the eyes, they were the same. Before I even knew what I was doing I started running across the road like a crazy person shouting after them, I didn’t even know what to say I just knew I had to get closer to them. They looked over to me – well to the racket I was making. I was almost across to the other side of the road when another pain shot through my head, stronger than before. I grabbed my head and doubled over in pain. I heard a screech of breaks that I presume is from the taxi my mystery person was trying to flag down, then almost as if to confirm it, I hear a car horn.

I can’t focus on it long as my vision has gone again and I can hear a woman’s voice chanting,

‘His precious heart.  Love to another, a deadly curse. Years you will have. Memories will not be. Start to fear. Watch him die that is your dept to pay. Your day comes to. The curse rebegins. End of time.’ My focus came back to present day, one name on my lips – Tabitha.

 I continued clutching my head.

‘Hay are you alright?’ I felt someone’s hand on my shoulder; I took a deep breath to steady myself.

‘Yeah I’m fine...’ I looked up straight into those piercing eyes and almost forgot how to speak

‘You’ I managed to stubble out,

‘Maggie?’ The man asked quizzically, grabbing my shoulders, steadying me, getting a better look at my face,

‘Maggie, who’s Maggie?’ I looked at him confused, if looked so familiar why couldn’t I remember him? When I didn’t recognise the name he called me by he tried another

‘Mable?’ he said into my ear almost disbelieving, I looked at him becoming even more confused. His face looked so familiar. Focus Jenny who is he?

‘Mable? I don’t... Ahhh’ the shooting pain returned in full force. I clutched my head once more, not caring in the slightest that I was still led in the middle of the road.

‘It’s ok I’ve got you’ the familiar stranger assured. ‘You’re safe, I promise you are safe!’ I believed him. Something about his presence, his voice, his face, I know this man! He is buried deep in my sub consciousness somewhere but I know in my gut he wouldn’t hurt me and that I can trust him with my life. That assurance from myself is all I needed to give into the pain and drop of into the blackness of my unconsciousness.