Her Atonement

Chapter 7

Anastasia

Life always has a way of getting in the way of things. I learned that lesson when I was fifteen and my mom divorced Ray. I had hoped that Mr. Grey wouldn't have remembered our meeting in Portland, and I had hoped that my attraction to him had solely been alcohol induced. Unfortunately for me, I was wrong on both counts. I hated myself for being so attracted to Grey; if it was just psychical attraction it would have been easier to deal with but it wasn't. For some reason, I felt emotionally drawn to him. There was just something about him that drew me in and I knew it was dangerous and completely idiotic no matter how intoxicating his kiss had been. Hell! I only met the guy twice! It would have been so much easier for me to manage all these conflicting emotions if I felt nothing for him than just psychical attraction. Then again, beauty is only skin-deep. After all, Satan had been beautiful too before God cast him out of heaven. Evil always needed a pretty package to tempt people and Grey was no different. A beautiful package with rotten contents. Once I reminded myself of that fact, it was simple to compartmentalize everything I felt for him. It made it easy to turn him down when he invited me for a drink.

I was still a little shocked that he did that, especially since GEH had a very strong no fraternization policy. Nevertheless, I guess Grey did whatever the hell he wanted, rules were merely tools to control his subjects. Thankfully, he took it well and I had not seen him again since the introduction meeting on Monday, and since today was Friday, I did not need to go to the office, and there was zero chance of running into him.

Instead, I just had my first classes. All in all, this internship wasn't so bad and I realized I was actually enjoying it. Kylie and I were given a project to find new ways to get donations for a charity called Coping Together that was run by Grey's mother. Although Kylie and I did not really get along, we did manage to scribble down some ideas. I walk to my car and throw my bag on the passenger seat, start the car, and drive off in the mild Friday afternoon traffic. I need to get some groceries if I want to eat this weekend and decide to shop at the farmers market on Pike Marketplace. There is a long queue at the ATM machine and I patiently wait while checking my cell phone. There is a text from an unknown number and I quickly check it.

Dear Anastasia, you left rather abruptly last Monday and we did not get to finish our conversation. Ever since I first saw you in Portland, you have been a constant on my mind. I would really like to have a drink with you sometime soon to clear the air so to speak. Let me know when you are available. Yours, Christian.

I am completely speechless how the hell did he get my number? I quickly remind myself that my number is probably on file somewhere since I am working for his company. Why can't this guy just take no for an answer? I quickly text him back.

Dear Mr. Grey, like I said, I don't think it is a good idea for us to have a drink. You are my boss and I would like to keep our relationship professional. Therefore, I must decline your offer. Sincerely, Anastasia.

I stow my phone away and enter my code into the ATM machine. My stomach plummets! I only have a 100 dollars left and the month has just begun. How am I going to pay for food and gas? A queue is forming behind me so I quickly take out 20 dollars and put it in my purse. I only buy the bare necessities to last me the week and head home. I am just about to open my apartment door when I hear Jimmy call my name.

"Sugar! Someone has sent you these! You must have one hell of an admirer cause these are stunning." He says while handing me a huge bouquet of beautiful white roses.

"So? Who are they from?" He asks while enthusiastically bouncing up and down in front of me.

"I don't know," I mutter, a little perplexed.

"There is a card at the back. What does it say?" He asks while pushing the card down so he could read it too.

Dear Anastasia,

Congratulations on your first week of work. I hope everything went well. I would like to have some drinks with you this weekend. Call me on this number when you are free. 206-555-2314

Christian.

This man is persistent and does not seem to take no for an answer. I don't think he has ever heard the word no from anybody in his entire life. Spoiled little rich boy, I think sourly. I feel a little ill. I cannot afford to piss him off no matter how much I want to. I cannot lose this internship.

"Who is Christian?" Jimmy asks.

Crap. I cannot tell him he is my boss.

"Some guy a met in a club a couple months ago."

"So what's the problem sugar? You do not seem too happy. Wasn't he hot?" he asks, causing me to scoff at his question.

"He was stunning. But he isn't the kind of man I thought he was." I reply, receiving a sympathetic smile from Jimmy.

"Most men scoring girls in clubs rarely are. Best let him down gently sugar if you want my advice." Jimmy says and gently pats my back, making me smile at him.

"I will. Thanks, Jimmy."

"No problem sugar. Are we still on for tonight?" He asks while moving backwards to his apartment.

"Yes, you bring the movie right?"

"Sleepless in Seattle sugar. Tom Hanks is fine!"

I giggle and wave at him.

"Laters, Jimmy."

He blows me a kiss and disappears back into his apartment.

I enter my apartment and throw the flowers on the kitchen counter, not sure what to do with them. I put away the groceries and then decide on a quick shower before I head off to the hospital to visit my daddy like I have done every evening since moving to Seattle.

I am just about to put on my shoes when there is knock on my door. I sigh. It is probably Jimmy being early for our film night. I thought I told him I was going to visit my dad first. Maybe he forgot? I open the door and I'm met with a pair of familiar blue eyes.

"Mom?" I ask, unable to hide the surprise in my voice.

"Hi, baby girl." My mom says.

I jump into her arms and she envelopes me into a warm loving hug, the kind that only moms can give. I breathe in her soothing scent and I start sobbing, freeing all the grief, pain, and sorrow that I bottled up these last few months.

She gently rocks me in her arms and hushes softly. It is so comforting, and it feels just like I am five years old again. She gently clasps my upper arms and pulls me away so she can look into my tear-stained face.

"Oh, baby what were you and Ray thinking! Hiding something so important from me." She scolds.

"I'm sorry." I manage to stutter out weakly. Mom wipes my nose gently with a handkerchief and ushers me inside the apartment.

"I was completely shocked when Jose Sr. called me two days ago and mentioned that Ray had cancer. He was under the assumption that I already knew. Why didn't you tell me?" she asks sternly.

"We just did not want you to worry mom. You have so much on your plate already." I say contritely and mom sighs and shakes her head.

"Oh, Anastasia just because my life is a mess right now does not mean I can't be there for Ray and you. Don't you know that I will always be there for you? No matter how tough life gets?" She says sounding hurt.

She would never say it out loud, but the underlying message is clear. It makes me feel even worse.

"Come here baby girl." She says and envelopes me into a hug again.

"Did you have dinner yet?" she asks.

"No. I was planning to visit Ray first."

"Well, I am coming with you. I was planning to see him tomorrow anyway. We can get some take out if you want after." Mom says.

"Sure mom just let me grab my purse."

When I get back I see that mom as put the flowers on the counter top in a vase.

"Anastasia, do you have something to tell me?" She asks while c*****g and eyebrow at me. Crap!

"No mom I was going to throw those flowers out. They came from an ass." I say defensively

"What happened?" Mom asks concerned.

"Nothing, he is just a heartless egotistical bastard and I don't want anything to do with him. Can we please just drop it?" I ask irritated.

Mom scrutinizes my face and then sighs.

"That bad huh? Fine. But if all women were to throw away perfectly good flowers because men are jerks, we would never have any flowers." She says and puts the vase on the coffee table before walking to the door.

We walk out of my apartment towards my car and mom is chatting up a mile a minute, asking me all about my internship at GEH, and telling me what an amazing opportunity I have been handed.

"I always knew you were special and would go far sweetheart. You're beautiful and you have a good head on your shoulders. Your father would have been so proud." She says hoarsely. She always gets emotional when she talks about my biological father who died a day after I was born.

I park Wanda and we make our way inside the hospital. The smell of anti- septic hangs heavy in the air and the atmosphere is filled with a strange mixture of grief, pain, joy and relief. It does not matter how often I come here; I can never get used to it.

Ray is not in his room when we enter and I immediately feel uneasy. I walk towards the reception desk on his floor and ask where he is. The elderly woman at the desk informs me that one of the nurses took him to the hospital cafeteria after he complained about the quality of the food. It makes me chuckle. Mom and I decide to go the cafeteria to meet him there.

I immediately spot him at a window seat eating a burger and fries and I cannot help but smile a little. That is just so Ray. Mom, however, doesn't look too pleased.

Ray looks up and is utterly shocked when he sees mom standing next to me.

"Carla?! What are you doing here?" He asks, not hiding his surprise.

"I am here to visit you which I could have done weeks ago if you had been so kind to tell me that you were sick!" Her voice goes up in a crescendo at the end. "How could you keep this from me, and worse, let our daughter keep this from me! I am so mad at you Raymond Steele. When were you planning to tell me? On your death bed?" She continues to rant at him making me feel sorry for him.

"You have enough issues of your own Carla. There was no need to burden you further. According to my doctors, my chances of survival are high."

"Well, I deserved to know. You cannot saddle Ana alone with this. It isn't fair." She says sternly, only to receive a stubborn look from Ray.

"See? This is exactly the reason why I did not want to tell you. I knew you would fly off the handle. You could never handle setbacks." He snaps back at her, making me feel uncomfortable. I always hated when they fight.

"That is a low blow, Ray. I care. I always have and I always will." Mom replies sadly.

Ray looks contrite and sighs.

"I am sorry I shouldn't have said that. Thank you for coming. I really do appreciate it."

The look on mom's face softens and she sits down at the table. She takes his hand and gives it a gentle squeeze.

"I cannot lose you, Ray. You are my best friend."

"You won't. I will conquer this disease. Don't you two worry your pretty little heads about that." He says with certainty and mom smiles at him. Thankfully, the rest of our visit with Ray went on a much lighter note. Mom and I decide to eat at the hospital cafeteria with Ray, and for a brief moment, it felt like we were a family again. After dinner, mom and I go back to my apartment where mom is staying with me for the upcoming week. She planned to stay at a hotel but I managed to talk her out of that idea. I like that she stays with me as long as she doesn't cook.

"Ana sweetheart I am going to take a shower is that alright?" She asks.

"Sure mom. I am going to make us some tea ok?"

"Sounds good honey." She says smiling.

I put on the kettle and grab two tea mugs out of the cupboard. I wonder if I still have some cookies left. There is another knock on the door and I hear Jimmy's high-pitched voice echoing through the hallway. Oh, right. Movie night. I almost forgot about that.

"Good evening Mr. Deveraux," I say smiling when I open the door.

"Brought some wine, cream and bacon Jalapenos, cheese with French bread and mozzarella sticks so we can have a proper movie night." He says while pressing a box filled with goodies into my hand.

"Wow, Jimmy. This is just too much. I have just eaten." I reply.

"No offense sugar, but you could use a sandwich or two. You're way too skinny. Besides, you can't have a proper movie night without some finger food. Gives us something else to drool about other than Tom Hanks." He says waving his hand dismissively. He walks towards the TV and pops the movie into de DVD player just as mom walks back into the room.

"Oh, I did not realize you had a guest and such a pretty lady." Jimmy gushes making mom blush.

"Jimmy this is my mom Carla. Mom this is Jimmy, my good friend, and neighbor." I introduce them.

"Lovely to meet you." Mom says charmingly

"Pleasure is all mine." Jimmy says and kisses her hand.

"Oh, such manners! You all see those in a good southern boy." Mom gushes.

"Born and bred ma'am." He says and winks at her.

Mom and Jimmy hit it off immediately mom was born in South Carolina and just like Jimmy, she possesses that sweet southern charm.

"Oh, these sticks are to die for." Mom says when she stuffs her mouth with another mozzarella stick.

"Made them myself." Jimmy says proudly.

"Jimmy is a chef working at Canlis; one of the top restaurants in Seattle." I tell her, proud of my new found friend.

"Oh, I heard you need a reservation a year in advance to dine there." Mom says awed.

"Sad but true. If you want, you can come with me on Monday morning and I will feed you some of our finest cuisines."

"Really? That would be amazing!" Mom says happily.

"Maybe we can share some good recipes from Carolina. I always love to learn new things." Jimmy says, and I can't help the heartfelt laugh that leaves my lips.

"Mom isn't the best cook Jimmy." I say, and he looks just like someone stole his last cookie.

"It is true. It is always hit or miss with my culinary skills." Mom confesses.

"Then I have no other choice than to teach you." He says resolutely.

Soon mom and Jimmy have the whole week planned for when I am working and I feel kind of left out. At the same time, I'm happy that they like each other, and I don't have to worry about mom when I am working. The only thing I am not happy about is that mom wants to take me shopping tomorrow as another birthday present but it is impossible to change her mind.

It is nearly 12 o'clock when Jimmy leaves and mom and I go to bed, and I cannot help but dream of intense gray eyes again.

The following morning, mom treats me to breakfast at a small café near my apartment block, and we spend almost the entire day shopping. Mom really takes it all out dragging me through every little boutique she can find. I am exhausted, and I still have not found anything to my liking yet. Lunch proves a welcome distraction and I silently hope that we can go home afterwards. My hopes are immediately dashed when mom drags me into the umpteenth boutique after lunch. It is small, quirky and smells of polished wood and expensive textiles. Mom browses through the racks and murmurs something about not leaving until she finds me something.

"How about this Ana?" Mom asks and hands me a beautiful mint green form fitting dress with a large brown belt.

"It is very Bohemian chic." I murmur.

"What is wrong with Boho-chic? It brings some color into your work wardrobe. Everything you have now is either black, white, and gray." Mom says frowning.

"It is what most people wear at work mom."

"Well those people are a dime a dozen and you baby girl are unique. Go on try it on."

I suppress the urge to roll my eyes at her and take the dress to try it on. I immediately love it. It hugs what little curves I have and accentuates my figure. My mom totally agrees. She hands me brown leather strap heels and a gorgeous Givenchy bag to match. She buys a long white linen dress for herself. We thank the lady in the store and finally head back home.

My weekend was amazing but was way too short. Jimmy came over and made us a lovely Sunday roast dinner that we ate with Ray in the hospital. Ray was very happy to finally have a proper meal and made me thank Jimmy over and over again. Now, it is Monday morning and I have to go back to work again, much to my dismay. I did not respond to Christian's numerous texts or his flowers and I dread the possibility of running into him at the office today. The man is persistent and apparently does not know the meaning of no. I scoff. That's probably because nobody ever told him no. He is just another spoiled little rich boy that thinks the world revolves around him.

I park Wanda and quickly make my way to my desk at marketing department. Kylie is already waiting for me with a scowl on her face.

"Good morning Kylie." I greet her politely.

"Where have you been? You were supposed to be here over a half hour ago." She immediately snaps at me taking me by complete surprise.

"What are you talking about? I am on time it is just 9 o'clock."

"I sent you an email yesterday evening telling you to get in early today. I heard that Mr. Grey's mother is coming today and we are supposed to give her a presentation of our ideas." She seethes.

"I didn't get any email from you." I say defensively.

"I send it at midnight." She bites back.

"I was asleep at midnight Kylie and in no position to check my email. Besides, I haven't heard anything about Mrs. Grey coming today." I say unable to hide the surprise in my voice.

"That's because you have no connections at GEH. I know all the important people. My friend Olivia is an intern for Mr. Grey's PA and she told me that his mother was coming over. It is on his schedule for today." She replies snidely.

Ugh, Kylie can be such a bossy b***h at times. I am beginning to dislike her more and more.

"Look, we can stand here all day arguing or get started on this presentation." I reply flippantly and she rolls her eyes at me before grabbing her stuff and heads to one of the free closed communal workspaces.

I sigh, take my messenger bag from my desk, and follow her.

"What time is Mrs. Grey supposed to come in?" I ask her.

"Olivia said 10:30 so we best get started I won't be made to look like a fool in front of Mr. Grey's mother." She replies tersely.

Good luck with that, I think uncharitably. I decide not to aggravate Kylie further. I open my MacBook and quietly begin to work on our presentation, streamlining the ideas we had from the notes we made. At 9:30 our department head Brad Lyndon, a thin[HM1] jovial man in his fifties peeks his head through the door.

"Good morning ladies. I have some exciting news. Mr. Grey and his mother will be down here at 10:30 to see what you girls have come up with. I suggest that you two make a nice presentation for them to showcase your ideas."

"Good morning Mr. Lyndon we already on it. I figured we needed to present our ideas to someone soon." Kylie tells him cheerfully while looking at me smugly.

"Oh, good. Excellent work girls. I am really excited to see what you two came up with." He gives us a tight smile and walks away again.

"Kylie, I don't think we should put in the idea of making Coping Together a more exclusive charity. It will cost donations." I say hesitantly.

"Seriously Anastasia. You don't get it, do you? By catering to a more exclusive crowd, Coping Together will get much higher donations. I know how rich people operate I grew up around them." She says snobbishly.

"Well, I am not comfortable with the idea. I think that we will get more donations if Coping Together would be more inclusive. Every dollar counts." I reply back sharply.

"You know what? How about we each present our own ideas? I go first and you can go after I am done." She snaps.

"Works for me." I counter back curtly.

We continue to work, only exchanging the bare necessities. I hate being grouped up with Kylie and I dread the weeks to come that I will be stuck with her. We are just in time with finishing the presentation when Mr. Lyndon informs us that Mr. Grey and his mother are on their way down. We grab our stuff and follow Mr. Lyndon to the empty conference room where we quickly set up our equipment.

I can feel his eyes burning into my back before I lay eyes on him and an involuntary shiver runs down my spine. I turn around and see him with an elegantly dressed beautiful, honey blond woman standing next to him. Our eyes lock and I quickly break his heated gaze.

"Good morning." He says coolly and sits down at the head of the conference table.

His mother smiles at us and greets us politely before sitting down next to him. Mr. Lyndon and two other people from the marketing department enter as well and close the door.

"Miss. Steele and Miss. Jordan I am very eager to hear your ideas." Mrs. Grey says warmly.

"Thank you, Mrs. Grey. I would like to start by showing you my ideas." Kylie says haughtily and I have to suppress the urge to roll my eyes at her.

I silently envy her when she is explaining her ideas with zeal and confidence in a flawless presentation. In some ways, she reminds me of Kate. Grace Grey surprisingly does not seem to be enthusiastic about the ideas Kylie brings forward.

"Forgive Miss. Jordan but isn't it better to broaden our demographic instead of focusing on just one specific group?" Mrs. Grey asks after Kylie's presentation.

"I believe it isn't Mrs. Grey. Research shows that the upper class gives much larger sums of money to charity than the rest of society. I, therefore, think it's better to just focus our efforts on them." Kylie replies confidently but Mrs. Grey is not convinced.

"Perhaps we should hear Miss Steele's proposals, mother. After that, we can make a decision." Mr. Grey says ending their discussion. His constant scrutinizing stare has made me feel warm and uncomfortable and I suddenly wish I was anywhere but here.

I anxiously start my part of the presentation. To my surprise, it goes pretty smoothly and 10 minutes later I have arrived at my conclusion.

"I think it is better to cater to a broader demographic. While it is true that rich people give more to charity, the middle class gives more frequently evening out the score. Charity isn't just about money it is also getting people involved with your cause. If we cater to a broader demographic we will likely get more people volunteering for various Coping Together projects." I end my presentation with slight hesitation.

I look towards Mrs. Grey and she smiles broadly at me.

"I really love all your ideas, Miss Steele. This is exactly what I was hoping for when I came in this morning. I would really like to discuss your ideas in more details soon. If it is all right with your bosses of course." She says with a sideways glance to Mr. Grey who has a funny look on his face.

"Of, course mother. We will schedule a follow-up meeting as soon as possible. Miss. Steele, I would like a full report detailing your ideas and the costs on my desk by noon and not a minute later. Thank you both." He says and brusquely gets up from his chair holding his hand out for his mother.

I stammer a yes sir and want to get out of the room as soon as possible. Kylie gives me the stink eye and walks past me without a second glance. Probably pissed that here ideas were shot down. I look at my watch crap it is already 10:30, which gives me only 90 minutes to finish my report. I quickly walk to my desk and begin to work.

"Nice work Miss. Steele." Mr. Lyndon compliments me with a smile when he walks past my desk.

"Thank you, sir." I murmur back feeling a little out of it.

"Enjoy your little victory while it last Anastasia. Soon everybody will see what a fraud you are." Kylie hisses angrily while walking past my desk taking me by complete surprise.

"This isn't a competition Kylie. We were supposed to do this together it was your idea to separate the presentation because you thought my idea sucked." I snap back. The nerve of this girl.

She huffs and throws her hair to the side of her face, then stomps back to her own desk. Great! My working relationship with Kylie just jumped the shark and I will be stuck with her for weeks to come. I sigh and continue to type up my report. I don't have time for this petty kind of distraction.

At 11:50 prompt, I am in the elevator to the twentieth floor to give my report to Mr. Grey's assistant. I do not wish to be alone with him at any cost. He makes me feel uncomfortable and his constant texts and flowers this weekend kind of crept me out.

I walk over to his perfectly coifed blond assistant and give her a polite smile. Andrea Parker, her nametag reads.

"Could you give this to Mr. Grey, please? It is a report on the new Coping Together marketing strategy." I say trying but failing to sound confident.

His assistant looks me up at me and then smiles.

"Good afternoon Miss. Steele. Mr. Grey is expecting you, you can go right in." She says in a friendly manner. Crap.

"Uhm..." I stammer like an i***t.

"It is through that door over there." Andrea says while pointing at a large brown oak door to the side of the room.

"Thanks." I mutter. I take a deep breath walk to the door and open it. The office is huge. A large classical Mahogany Victorian desk stands in the centre forming a bright contrast with the otherwise modern decor. On the walls hang a couple of abstract paintings of common items. The pictures draw me in and I cannot help but stare at them .

"They are Trouton." I hear his deep masculine voice coming from behind me, and I feel that familiar pull between us again. That scorching, burning heat that I both love and hate.

"They raise the ordinary to the extraordinary." I murmur more to myself than to him, not daring to look him in the eyes. When I do look up his face is a mixture of surprise and wonder.

"I couldn't agree more Miss. Steele please. Have a seat." He says while pointing at a large dinner like a table near the windows.

I comply and sit down at the table, and although the view over Seattle is magnificent, I cannot enjoy it. The tension pulsing between us is palatable.

"You know, it is considered polite that you thank people when they send you a gift." He says. His voice is cold and unyielding. I swallow audibly, and I feel like a deer stalked by a mountain lion.

"I am sorry Mr. Grey, but I have been very busy this weekend. My mother came over." I say defensively.

"It would not have hurt you if you took two minutes to fire off a thank you message. You were very quick to turn down my invitation for lunch. A situation I will now rectify. I ordered you a Caesar salad and some French bread. If you don't like it I can order you something else." He says with so much authority in his voice.

What the hell? The nerve of this man!

"Mr. Grey, I turned down your invitation for lunch because it isn't appropriate. If you do not wish to discuss the report now I am happy to discuss it some other time." I reply while getting up from the table.

"SIT DOWN. Having lunch wasn't a request Miss. Steele, it's an order. We shall discuss your report and our situation over lunch. Now… Sit. Down." He barks.

I am so completely bewildered that I follow his instruction like a meek little lamb. He is finally showing his true colours. The dominant, cold and careless master of the universe, bending everyone and everything to his will. The devil in disguise indeed. Suddenly I feel anger rise inside me. For a moment, I contemplate on telling him that I would never go out with him even if he were the last man on earth because he is a careless, selfish, parasitic bastard, but I decide against it. I cannot afford being fired, or worse, blacklisted.

"Good girl." He says in a patronizing manner and I want to slap him.

"Now, I hope we can have these discussions in a civil manner. Would you like a glass of water?" He asks in a consolatory manner while holding up the water carafe.

I stare at him dumbstruck and he pours my glass without waiting for my answer.

"My mother really loved your ideas and she was quiet taken with you. I want you to work with her for the upcoming weeks to help implement your ideas. She will contact you later today." He states in his matter-of-fact no-none-sense manner.

"All right." Is all I can muster. This man is like a freight train waltzing all over me and there is nothing I can do to stop him. It makes feel like an impotent child again and I hate it.

"Now that we have discussed the report. We can discuss us." He says confidently.

"There is no us." I snap taking him by complete surprise and for a moment, he looks hurt.

"Why are you so resistant? Don't you feel it the pull between us? Please tell me, have I done anything to offend you?" He asks.

There are a number of things I want to tell him. He indirectly destroyed my life and Ray's life. It does not matter that he was only a silent partner he should have known what was going on. I do not care about the physical attraction between us. This isn't some romance novel where the beast suddenly turns into a prince. Before I can answer him, there is a knock on the door and Andrea comes in bringing a box with lunch. Mr. Grey thanks her before dismissing her. He places the box with Caesar salad in front of me.

"Eat." He says while gesturing at it.

"I am not really hungry, but thank you." I lie stubbornly. There is a dangerous glint in his eyes when he stares at me and I feel my stomach drop.

"Tell me, Miss Steele, do you get a kick out of reeling me up? It is lunchtime and you probably haven't eaten since breakfast. I want my staff to be productive. You cannot be productive on an empty stomach so please, eat." He says dismissively while tucking into his own salad.

My treacherous stomach grumbles and his mouth twists in a half smile. I reluctantly begin to eat which seems to please him.

"My question. You haven't answered it. Have I done something to offend you?" He asks again.

Yes! I want to yell at him but I refrain.

"No, Mr. Grey. You have not offended me. My life has taken an unexpected turn and I do not have time to be in a relationship with anyone at the moment."

"How so?"

I really do not want to tell him about Ray. He is the one that f****d up Ray's life after all and once I start talking I know I will blow up at him. I take a deep steadying breath before I reply.

"It is very personal sir, and I do not want to talk about it."

"You know Anastasia, someone once told me that is better to share pain than to bottle it up inside. I won't lie to you Anastasia, I want you. I have wanted you from the moment I first locked eyes with you and I know you feel the attraction too. You're a siren's call that I cannot resist. All I ask is that you give me, us a chance." He says earnestly. I hate to admit it but deep down I know he is right. I am attracted to him. However, none of that matters. I know what kind of a man he is: dangerous on all levels.

"I am sorry, but I can't."

"Why the hell not?! Don't you feel it? This pulse between us. You burned and branded me like I burned and branded you."

I swallow audibly.

"Well answer me!" He snaps

"I do. But it doesn't matter! s****l attraction is not the basis for a healthy relationship. On top of that, it is gross moral turpitude to pursue a relationship with a subordinate. You and I will never work. If you will excuse me, sir, I need to go back to work." I reply and get up from the table.

He stands too, anger marring his face.

"How can you know if we will never work if you don't give us a chance?" He hisses.

"I am sorry." I whisper unable to look at the hurt on his face.

"You are not being honest with me or yourself Anastasia. Make no mistake I always get what I want and this isn't over." He says softly but there is menace in his voice.

"Is that a threat?" My voice is shaking and my heart constricts at his treating words. This is bad very bad.

"No, Anastasia it is a promise." He replies brusquely.

I am shocked by the venom in his voice and want nothing more than run from him and his office. I quickly make my way out of his office right into the elevator. I take a deep steadying breath willing the flurry of emotions to come down. Christian Grey has proven to be a handful, and I don't know how to deal with him. Suddenly I wish that I had never gone to 7th Circle on that faithful evening when I met him. All I want is for this aching burn to stop.