After Your Rejection

Chapter 12 The Decision

Alexis

Once back in my room, I fall to my knees and start crying. Again. All I did in the last 12 hours was cry. My heart is aching so bad I want to claw it out of my chest. Something broke in me, but I'm unsure what it was. Maybe it was my heart. I cannot stand back on my feet. After a while, Axel returns to my room with his knuckles dirty from blood. Probably a mixture of his blood and Alpha Sebastian's. I guess he kept punching Sebastian after my departure. I can't see any wound on Axel, which means Alpha Sebastian didn't fight him back. I don't know what Axel did to him, but at this point, I don't care. Axel picks me up and puts me in my bed. My body is shaking, my breathing is frantic, and the pain is unbearable. I cannot reach my wolf. She has to be in pain, too, when she isn't responding.

'Shhh, Alexis, it's going to be okay. Just breathe. Slowly in and slowly out… Just like that. I'm here with you, sis. Keep breathing. The pain will go away, just hold on for a while.' Axel is trying to calm me down. Thank you, Goddess, for my brother. I don't know what I would do without him.

'Axel, I don't want anybody to know about this.' I tell him pleadingly. The last thing I need right now is my pack members pointing fingers at me and gossiping about what happened. Or seeing their pitiful glances.

'Are you serious? Dad should definitely know about this. He will be furious with Sebastian for the way he treated you. He will beat the sh*t out of him, maybe he will even kill him.' Axel says, still angry. He takes a few deep breaths to control his temper, but I can see he's struggling to contain his wolf. They are both very protective.

'That's exactly why I don't want him to find out about the rejection. They need to work together to prevent more rogue attacks, not fight with each other. They need to be united if they want to succeed. They need to protect their packs… I don't want anybody to find out. I don't want to see their pitiful looks or their judgmental remarks about me rejecting an Alpha. That will be the death of me. I don't want to be treated differently just because I wasn't enough for my fated mate.' I tell him honestly.

'Alexis, you are enough. He is just a f*cking i***t for not realizing it. He will regret it, you will see.' Axel kisses my head and starts humming a song our Mum was singing to us when we were children. Axel knows I don't want to talk more right now. After a while, I succumb to a dreamless sleep. Thank Goddess I'm not hunted in my dreams, the current suffering is enough.

When I woke up, it was almost noon, and I was surprised nobody was asking me to get the hell out of my bed. Even Bri didn't disturb me, which is unlike her. I guess Axel told them some fabricated story so they didn't bother me and let me be alone. Now I'm realizing the consequences I'm going to face. What's worse, I know now what was the cause of the worst pain I felt. I just hope it's not permanent. I need to get away from this pack, from this life. I don't want to incessantly see Alpha Sebastian. He still needs to work with other Alphas because of the rogue situation, which means attending meetings in our pack house every month or so. I don't like the idea of constantly seeing him. No, thanks. A constant reminder that I wasn't enough for my mate. Me, the daughter of the strongest Alpha! I can't stand to be in the same place as him. I need to transfer to another college as soon as possible.

There is no point in wasting my time on lunch. I'm not hungry despite the fact I ate nothing today. I turn on my notebook and start my search for colleges in human towns and cities that offer educational study programs.

In the evening, Axel comes to see me for the hundredth time, to make sure I'm okay. I'm not okay, I know it and he knows it. But I'm doing my best not to break into pieces, to stay strong. All the Alphas along with the guys left in the meantime. Bri is currently staying with her mother, as Axel informed me. Apparently, Alpha Sebastian excused himself with some fabricated story that he was needed in his pack. F*cking bulls*t! I don't understand how I could be so stupid and fall in love with him. Yup, I allowed myself to wail in my misery for a while, then sort through it, and realized, I was in love with him even before I found out he was my mate. But that's in the past now.

I think everybody knows something is happening to me, but they are giving me a lot of much-needed space and are waiting for me to tell them what's wrong. I hardly left my room and didn't talk to my parents or friends much. Axel was the only one allowed into my room.

-------------------------

'Mum, Dad, I decided to transfer to another college. I found a great one in Connance and my application was accepted. It's a human city less than a two-hour drive from our pack.' I tell my parents after several days of searching and online interviews. I did my best to meet their expectations and my application was finally accepted. I'm not going to lie, I had luck on my side this time.

'Why do you want to transfer to a human college?' Dad asks me incredulously. He doesn't like the idea of me leaving the pack. I understand why, but he doesn't know what happened. And I'm not going to tell him. But one thing is clear to me. I'm not staying here any longer.

'I want to try something new, to meet different kinds of people, maybe different supernatural beings, and to try out a life where I'm on my own, where nobody knows me as your daughter. I think it'll be good for me to step out of my comfort zone.' I try to reason with them. I must admit, their reaction is different from Axel's.

'Alexis, what the f*ck?' Was Axel's reaction. He knew I was trying to come up with an escape plan, but he didn't expect this.

'Ax, I need to get away from Sebastian. You know as well as I do that, as long as I live here, in this pack, I'll have him in my sights every damn month, maybe even more often. I need to forget about him, forget everything. It's just for a while, it's not permanent. Please, can you support my decision? Pretty please?' I begged him to understand my reasons, to support me, and help me to persuade our parents. I needed a strong ally, and he could be it.

Axel rolled his eyes, but in the end, he said 'fine'.

After a full-hour talk with my parents and with Axel on my side, they finally agreed to support my transfer to another college. It's my ticket away from Alpha Sebastian, from this life that is no longer for me. I know what happened to me after I rejected him is permanent. I didn't tell anybody, not even Axel. They wouldn't allow me to leave the pack if they knew. I can't wait to pack my things, hop in my car and drive away. Who knows, maybe I can put my life and heart back together there?