Untouched

Chapter Five- Joanna

The second that the door came to a close, Natalie felt herself entombed with a man she hardly knew, whom she had chosen to trust despite a plethora of conversational evidence against him. But as she turned to face him and met with the evergreen orbs staring back at her with caution, she could not imagine him bringing harm to a single soul; not even a fly. Even in this moment, when she was alone with him, his eyes didn’t descend on her in lust as they had with Kenton. Instead, he continued to analyze her for a physical confirmation to himself that she was alright after the night she had been forced to endure. And if this silent observation was not enough, he would eventually break through his worry and simply ask her.

“I was fretting you would be quite rattled...I was...I’m sorry I couldn’t say anything to help…But I am glad to see you’re right as rain...or...as right as you can be after…” He ceased, every attempt he made to be kind or compassionate having come across humorous and nervous. He clenched his teeth and turned from her as she was allowed to see his reflection in the small cabinet of priceless books hidden behind a few panes of glass.

“Have you eaten?” He now turned, holding a granola bar and a Gatorade in his grasp. “Sorry, it is all I have on hand…”

“I’m fine, thank you. I’m sorry about just dropping by, my room is sealed off and I don’t know anybody else here...And you mentioned sleeping here and-”

“It’s alright...I am actually glad to see you...I was worried you would be...I’m sure the last thing you want to do is relive it...But I just want to ensure you’re alright…”

She nodded.

“Then...stay as you need. I am sure they will assign you a new room in the morning...And if not, you’re welcome to stay here...The couch may not be a queen size mattress or anything but...it gets the job done…” She looked over to the futon lined with a rather plush top and accented with a university blanket stretched over it lazily; as if she had disturbed him from his own attempt to rest. “If you need anything, I’ll be-”

“You’re not staying?” Her question, or more specifically the eagerness in her tone, had surprised him as his eyes softened to her as he answered her question with a denial toss of his head.

“I don’t think it’s very prudent…”

“Maybe just for tonight...You could stay in here? I only say it because...There’s someone out there that did that to her...And I know I might seem naive, but I like to think I’m a good judge of character. And although I know this is nothing romantic or anything I just...I feel like I can trust you-at least enough to not physically hurt me.” Her eyes narrowed as his face softened, almost as if her words meant more to him than any compliment she could have attempted to puff his self esteem with following this. “I’m mumbling, I’m sorry-”

“No, I understand...And if I’m honest...I would feel better staying with you as well. After all, you are quite intimidating and I reckon you could defend yourself quite well-”

“ME? Intimidating?” She scoffed. “I don’t think-”

“You’re hardened...It pains me to wonder why, but I also understand it…” Quickly, Jackson cleared his throat before letting out a sigh.

“Well then...I have an extra pair of clothes if you wish to change out of your jeans...There is a bathroom right through that door-” He pointed to a paneled entry that she had mistaken for a unique design in the wall before she captured the clothes in his grasp, and moved into the direction of the bathroom. Once opening the door, she came upon the sight of a recently used towel, a shaver still wet from having been recently used and cleaned, and a single bottle of cologne with the top half twisted.

Natalie forbade herself from reaching for the bottle as she knew it would only make her fall into a deeper fascination with her professor, having his scent portable for her whenever she wished. So instead, she attempted to carry on with her task at hand, which was undressing. But after she managed to remove her shirt and stand in only her black bra, her curiosity became too much for her. She reached for the glass bottle, but slipped on a wet spot upon the floor and fell into the shelf suctioned to the mirror. Cursing beneath her breath, the door behind her suddenly came open and Jackson stood in awe.

“Are you alright?!’ He questioned immediately, seemingly unphased at the fact she was half dressed; unaware that he fought every nerve in his body to keep from observing her in this state.

“Sorry, I slipped…” Having managed to catch herself on the sink before she joined the shelf on the floor, she quickly dove to pick up the pieces, flushing with embarrassment in the process, as he joined her. But as he came this close to her, his fingers tracing hers as they both reached for the pieces of broken glass upon the ground, he struggled to remain a gentleman entirely.

“I’ll retrieve the dust pan…” He spoke nervously, leaving her alone in his office for a minute to allow himself a second to breathe, as he returned to find her still half undressed and desperate to clean up the mess she made.

“Why don’t you finish changing, I”ll...I’ll clean it…” His eyes did not meet with hers and instead, he had left her to question the sudden cold nature of his behavior to her.

The second her steps crossed back into his office, he slammed the door with his foot as she quickly changed out of her clothes and into the ones offered to her. Finding the sweatpants to have been loose at her hips, she was forced to tie them as tight as possible, while the university tee hung loose on her curves.

“Are you proper, love?” His tone thrilled her through the door as she answered honestly as he averted his eyes in case, before opening the door, and bringing the glass into the trash can.

“Did any of it cut you?” His eyes returned to her once again to observe her for himself.

“No-I’m fine...I’m sorry that I’m such a klutz-”

“I’m just glad you’re alright...But since you’re here and I have a first aid kit on hand...can I take a look at your palms?”

She looked to her hands, having recalled the feeling of his body crashing into hers and the sudden regret felt by them both as she nodded. He slid the chair closest to the futon in her direction as she sat on the plush cushion across from him.

“I will have to see your hands…” He teased as she offered a weak smirk and pulled her palms upright before nodding. Rolling them with self loathing at her awkwardness when his gaze fell to her, there lied an immediate electricity to his hands taking hold of hers as he applied a slight topical gel to her wounds. Although only a few scratches and a handful of pits where rocks had temporarily embedded their way into her skin had rested, she was rather unharmed. But for Jackson, he wanted any excuse he could to touch her, and for Natalie, she wanted to let him.

“All set.” He finally spoke as she pouted internally while he turned from her, trying to ignore the way he felt at such an innocuous moment. “You should try and sleep, it’s only a few hours until class…” He swallowed hard as he moved in the direction of the hallway.

“I thought you were staying…”

“I think you and I both know it isn’t wise...But I’ll be right outside the door-”

“Please Jackson, don’t be silly…”

“I can’t.” He moved to the door, struggling either to stay or go. His body pulled him away and to her at the same extent, with the same force; but with two separate origins; one from lust and one from the past reminding him.

“Is it because of Joanna?” He stilled, tensing every muscle in his body, before facing her.

“How do you-What exactly are you saying?” His tone now changed to her entirely. Suddenly, the ‘kind’ man she had come to know, the one she told herself was incapable of hurting anyone or being cross, with the exception of an excepted self defense on one’s reputation-as shown with the campus police, he altered before her eyes. The soft nature of his emerald gaze now darkened into a swampy green and his seemingly perpetual grin had now fallen into a hard line, hiding his tightened jaw.

“I didn’t mean anything accusatory-just that-”

“YOU came to ME...I am trying to act the bloody gent and you bring up-” He paused himself. “If you know what’s good for you, you will never mention her to me again. IF the situation presents itself, which after tonight, you’ll need to make other arrangements.” Closing the door in a harsh slam, she was left curious and even frightened by him. A small flicker of dread filled her sense of recently present hope as she feared that perhaps he could be capable of taking a life if he would become as defensive as that with just the mention of that name…

Joanna...