A Whole New World

  "Don't you DARE tell me to calm down!" Glenn said in a snide tone.  "You!  You are the reason I am this upset in the first place!"  Glenn’s voice boomed through our small townhouse as he was entering from the garage and slamming the door behind him.  At that moment it seemed like this was going to be yet another long night of a never-ending argument that I was all too familiar with.  Hoping that we didn't keep the neighbors up (again).       I was entering the kitchen to finish the dishes that I had left to soak before heading to bed, Glenn grabbed my wrist and spun me around to face him.  The action caught me off guard and my hip jammed into the counter.  I winced, then my eyes immediately dropped to the floor like they always tend to do.  I don't know why, but that was the moment that I caught myself and realized what I had become accustomed to and that was the moment that I decided to have a little courage.         I gathered myself and turned to face him in a sturdy, but hushed tone because my son had been tucked into bed 2 hours ago and said "The reason you are upset is because I told you that I can not do this anymore.  I can't handle the constant arguments; the snide remarks and I certainly will not allow my son to start treating me the way you do!" surprising even myself at how I was even able to look him in the eye as I said those words.  I could see the shock and then rage forming in his eyes.  The crease started to form between his eyebrows and could see that he was trying to restrain himself.  He then turned around without another word and stomped back into the garage the same way he had entered.  (loud and with a bang...) Even though I knew it was coming, I could not stop my body from flinching from the impact of the door slamming closed and hoping (but not likely) that my son would still be sleeping.        With slumped shoulders, I turned back to the sink and washed the dishes.  This house may be a bit of a mess, but I will not have piles of dirty dishes I thought to myself.  I worked all day only to come home to a mess.  As much as I cleaned and tidied up, it sometimes felt like a windstorm followed behind me.  I was tired.  My routine was work, dinner, clean, dishes and repeat (oh, and try my best not to do anything to upset my husband because I hated confrontation).  The only joy in my day was bath and bedtime with my son.  I felt defeated but still greeted each day like the last.       Realizing I had caught myself in a daze, I pulled the drain plug on the sink after wiping down the stove and counters.  Watching the water drain out of the sink, I couldn't help but feel my hopes of being happy one day leave along with the water and flow away from me.  I looked at the clock on the microwave realizing that it was now after 10 pm and if I wanted to be productive at work the next day, I needed to get to bed because 5:30am comes too soon!  I started making my way past the entryway that led either out the front door, out to the garage or upstairs to the bedrooms.  Just as I started climbing the stairs, I heard a crash in the garage.  I turned around and opened the door only to find shattered glass all over the floor.  I don't know if he had thrown his beer or accidentally knocked it over because as usual, he has been drinking since dinner time.  With a puzzled look on my face I said, "What the heck happened?"   "What do you think happened?  Clean this mess up before you go to bed." he yelled with a staggered slur. That did it...     "Clean it yourself" I said as I closed the door and headed upstairs, not having the energy to deal with him anymore tonight.  I never know how much he consumes, but if he is slurring then he has had more than enough.  I used to be able to pick the exact drink that would turn him from the happy go lucky man that I fell in love with to the devil himself.   As I was at the top of the stairs, my son's bedroom door started to open slowly. "What's going on mommy?" my son asked in a frightened but tired little voice. "It's nothing baby, just go back to...."   BANG Crashing and banging coming from the garage as I hear the garage door opening "GET BACK HERE AND CLEAN THIS f*****g MESS UP" Glenn started yelling again.       All I could see in front of me was fear in my little one's eyes.  Glenn had started stomping up the stairs and in a split-second decision, I scooped up my son in my arms and ran with him into his room.  Within 2 seconds we were in his room with the door shut and I was pushing the dresser against the door.  Not like a child's dresser would do much to keep him out, but I had to hope!         Pounding started against the door, and I heard a ding come from my back pocket.  What the...  I thought and then realized that I had my phone on me.  Looking at my son and the tears forming in his eyes, he had slid between his bed and the wall trying to hide.  That is when I looked at my phone and for the first time in 10 years, I made the decision to take my life back.  If I don't do something now, I have a clever idea where this will lead...without a second though, I watched my own finger as hand typed 9-1-1 and only after a millisecond hesitation hit the CALL icon just as the door smashed in....