I am yours

Episode 4

Eva

My phone was vibrating again. That`s pulled me out of my thoughts. Actually I thought that through about a thousand times by now. I checked the caller ID. I wasn't surprised. That was Dave again. He called me for the third time since I arrived at the beach. To be honest now I got my past back in my mind again he was the last person who I wanted to talk to, but I reminded myself, he is good to me, he just cares about me. So I answered this time. 

- Hi Dave.

- Hi beautiful. Where are you, why didn't you answer?

- Just came out from an interview.

- Oh. How it went?

- I think it went okay.

I didn't want to tell him that, the middle aged man looked at me like he wanted to pull me over the table and fu*k me hard on it. So probably I have a good chance to get the job.

- What did they say?

- They didn't refuse.

- Good, I hope you`ll get it.

- I hope that too.

- It's a good thing Eva. So I wanted to invite you for dinner today, but now I think we have a reason to celebrate, so what do you think? I'll cook.

No. I wasn't in the mood. 

- I'm really sorry Dave, but I promised Max I was going to help him with something.

- Oh. I think he would understand.

- No Dave. You know how much I owe him, I cannot refuse.

- Okay. But let me know when you are free. 

I could hear I made him sad. I felt sorry about him. He wanted much more than I could give. I could have s*x with him, and I could play that I care, but why I'd do that? And then when I have enough I'd lose his friendship as well. It wasn't worth it.

- Okay. I'll let you know. But I have to go now. 

- Okay. Take care.

I hung up and immediately called Max.

- Hey Eva, what's up?

- Hi, just need you to do me a favour. 

- What?

- Please if you see Dave, just tell him you asked me to do a favour tonight.

- Again?

- Yeah. You know.

- Of course I do, but If I was you...

- I know, you told me a hundred times, and I told you a hundred times why I don't want it.

- Okay, I said nothing. 

- I'll meet you at home.

- Right love.

- Bye.

I hung up. Max was my flatmate. I rented a room from him in his apartment. He is a gay. And I think this is what I liked in him the most. I could talk to him about everything. He worked as a shop assistant, but at night he became a “woman” and he performed in nightclubs. I liked him so much. He was the only one, who knew my whole story. 

He told me about himself a lot. I felt sorry about him too. I felt that they are so unwanted and that is why they broke. I've been broken just like him, and probably that's why we could understand each other. I hope that ones he'll find his other half. 

I waited for three years to get my happiness back, but it didn't come, and I lost the hope of I'll see him again this lifetime and even if I'd see him I don't think I could forgive him. But Max still can find his happiness. I hope one day he'll find it. 

When I got home he saw that I'm not in a good state, I told him about my day.

- I have a bottle of tequila. What do you think?

He asked me. I smiled and nodded. 

- I knew that you were going to solve all my problems.

- That's right baby.

We started to drink like crazy. One shot after another. And we got drunk, had some music on and we danced. He performed to me, which made me laugh loud. Then I performed to him, started singing. I could sing a bit, but when I sang the high notes he still put his palms to his ears which made both of us laugh. 

Normally I'd worry the neighbours going to be disturbed by us, but at that moments I didn't care. I didn't even think about Dave who lived straight next to us. I just refused his dinner invitation and then if he could hear us, probably he will never forgive me. But at that moment I didn't care at all. Just wanted to enjoy myself and clear my thoughts out. Finally we laid next to each other, we could hardly breath. 

- Why don't you apply in a nightclub? There is a lot around. They usually owned by foreign origins. They might help you.

- My mom worked in one. She has always been very busy.

- And what? You don't have family. It's good for a start.

- I'll think about it.

- Just an Idea. I don't want you to leave. 

- I know, I love you too.

Tomorrow morning I had a little headache but not as bad as I thought. Maybe I should drink less. I've got back what Max said. Nightclubs. Well even every inch of me was against it, I had to admit, that would be a chance to stay in my dream place, and since when I care what I'm doing? 

The sad true was I didn't even care if I'd ended up as a pole dancer unless I don't need to fu*k for money. But at least I could stay. And that was the moment I made my decision. I took my laptop and googled all the nightclubs around. I sent my CV for each of them. I have to give this chance to myself. It was the weekend, so I didn't think anyone would get back for me, but I can wait. Not too long, but I can.