Changing Places with Yourself

Chapter 6

I arrived at their gate at 6:50 p.m. and was buzzed in.  Jimmy came out to show me where to park and then opened my door to help me out.  At least the father was a gentleman even if his son is a certified asshat.  Once inside Judy came to the door and introduced me to Grandpa Harold Novell.  We all moved to the living room to have a discussion pre-dinner.  Jimmy told me that he and Judy were wanting to travel before they got too old and Grandpa wanted to retire soon.  That being said they needed someone who could take over the family business because none of them trusted the cousins who were in line behind Evan.  Seems that Jimmy’s sister’s son was a vile creature, I had to stop myself from asking if he was Evan’s twin separated at birth.  They went over what would be expected of me in limited detail before Evan came in the front door and inquired, “Who owns that sweet ride parked in the front of the house?”

“It’s mine,” I informed him.

“What?  Don't you drive an old clunker to school?  How can you afford a Ferrari 488 Spider?” he questioned me.

“Well, unlike some, I don’t like to show off how much money I have.  Just to impress my classmates.  I would have too many looking at me with dollar signs filling their eyes to the point where they couldn't see me at all.”  was my retort.

“As ugly and fat as you are should be grateful for any attention of any kind, even if you have to pay for it.” he scoffed.

“Sorry, but just because your dates are w****s and charge you for their time doesn't mean I should have to lower myself to your standard.  And as far as being fat and ugly.  1) That insult is downright lame, no wonder you're failing English if you can't come up with something more original.  Here, I'll help next time try something ‘like look Shamu is about to give birth again!’ Or ‘Watch out! The Hindenburg is about to explode.’  See those are more descriptive.  Try better next time you insult someone. 2) My physical appearance can be changed by skilled surgeons.  Unfortunately, for you, the only way to correct your personality flaws is with a frontal lobotomy, but even then you'd have to have pay for someone that would be there to wipe the continuous drool from your chin.” I countered.

Laughter rang out in the living room and we both look to see his grandfather, who is now crying from laughing so hard.

“Jimmy and Judy, I like her.  You both did well.  Evan, get down on one knee and propose to this girl now.” he instructed.

“Grandpa, I can't be seen married to a cow like this.  She'll kill my rep.” Evan wailed.

“Can we schedule his lobotomy now, just to save time before the wedding?” I tested, halfway serious.

“Becky, trust me that is tempting especially when he's acting like a whiny little five-year-old.” Judy declared earning a glare from Evan.

“Well, for now, while the grown-ups talk maybe he can just sit in the time-out chair?” I quipped, which made him growl at me.

The doorbell rang and Jimmy went to get the pizza and then direct us all to the dining room.  When they asked what I would like to drink I replied, “Water would be great.  Thanks.”

“We have a variety of soda is available if you like.” Jimmy notified me.

“I don’t drink sodas anymore they all taste way too sweet even the ones that are marked ‘Diet’.  Water is just fine, but thank you for offering alternatives.” I responded.

“Judy told me your parents are dead and I'm sorry for your loss, but I will say that they did raise you to have beautiful manners.  Now, let's discuss the prenup you'll have to sign.” Grandpa began.

“Actually, my lawyer sent over a rough draft after I told him about our dinner tonight because they figured out what you guys wanted before you told me.  So, if you have a computer hooked to a printer I can get it off my email and print it out for you to look at after dinner is over.” I suggested.

“Jimmy, show her to the computer, I’d like to review it while we eat.” Grandpa pointed for us to leave.

We came back several minutes later with the printout.  To say Grandpa’s eyes bugged out when he read the name of my family’s business would be the understatement of the year, and yet somehow they got bigger when he saw my personal net worth.

“Jimmy, did you see this?” He asked pointing to those areas.

“Yes, Dad, I skimmed it on the way back here, and no, we didn’t know either of those two bits of information when we picked her.  We simply liked her responses to the questionnaire.  We thought her personality was just what Evan needed to keep him in line.”  Jimmy refuted before he showed the pages to Judy, whose eyes grew wide as well.

“What the hell are you all gawking at those pages like that for?” Evan insisted someone tell him.

“It’s nothing you need to worry about, Evan.  Just focus on your own business and leave me to mine.  I was told by my lawyer that this prenup is just protecting all my assets for the day when I divorced you for cheating on me.” I advised him.

“You seem pretty sure he'll cheat,” Grandpa uttered.

“Well, since he was sucking face with one of the cheer w****s at lunch today right in front of me.  After being told before we met in the Principal’s office by his parents that they wanted him to marry me.  Yeah, it's pretty much a given he'll cheat.” I warned.

“Well, I sure as hell ain’t going to be putting my lips anywhere near your gross body.” Evan declared.

“Great that is fine by me, I don't want to catch whatever diseases you get from those w****s.  So, you can keep as far away from me as possible.”  I retort.  “It’s not like you can produce any child anyway given the fact that you're sterile.”

“How the hell do you know that?” he exploded.

“My lawyer is 10 times better than yours could ever be or hope to be.  He got a full rundown of your medical history as well as why you moved here.  Amy, I believe her name was, the gold-digging slut who drugged you and then tried to steal almost $60,000 from your bank account day before you turned 18.  It's just lucky for you, your dad was alerted and able to stop the transfer before she gets it.  I mean what a way to end your junior year drugged, robbed, and then, the cherry on top, was her trying to pin one of her other boyfriends’ baby on you.  She really was a piece of work, wasn’t she?” I finished.

“Wow, your lawyer is good to find that all out in just a day,” Grandpa uttered.

“Actually, Evan has been harassing me at lunch for some time and Joel my lawyers PA, got tired of it, so he started the research like 2 weeks ago.  He wanted to have everything in place for harassment suit against Evan.” I corrected.

“Evan, what have you been saying to her at lunch?” Judy ordered him to answer.

“What? I just told her to keep her fat ugly ass out of my way.” He expressed to her like it was a normal way to speak to another person.

“Actually, that's not it, but I can show you some of the videos since I'm one of the ones that wears a body cam at school to help catch bullying.” I offered.

Grandpa, Judy, and Jimmy asked to see them so we moved to the living room so I could play them on the big screen.  Evan swore and said he was going out for a while.  I told him before he walked out the front door that my car had cameras hidden all over it so if you tried to key it I was sure his parents would ground him after he served his time for committing a malicious felony.  He flips me off as he opens the door and I can’t help myself so I say, “Love you too, babe.” as a parting shot.  It was something my brothers and I would say to each other if we were flipped off by one of the others.  “I guess old habits die hard” I laughed at the thought.

I went ahead and cued up a few of the videos of Evans lunchtime harassments and my responses.  Grandpa laughed at how I was able to cut Evan down to the knees with a few words.  He had no idea how much practice growing up with three older brothers helped in developing my sarcasm, which was now a way of life when dealing with cocky jerks like Evan.  Again Grandpa told me that I was the right lady for Evan, someone who could keep him in line.  Jimmy asked me about where I was living and I told him the address.  Judy asked if I had any family left and I gave him a quick overview of what my aunt did to me after my parents’ death.  I added that my lawyers were trying to bring my parents’ bodies back for a proper burial and they were getting closer but the bureaucrats were getting in the way. Judy came over and held me after hearing how I had to let my aunt abuse me while I gathered proof that I needed to have her and her boy toy put away for life.  Grandpa asked about who was running my family business while I was in school and I told him about Mr. Javcir, who had been my dad's right-hand man, running the day-to-day for me for right now.  I spent most of my summers in the corporate office is learning from my parents since I was 8, so that made it about 7 years of practice.  They had me start in the mailroom flash supply area and I worked up to making CEO decisions by the time I was 15.  I was sad not to have them there as a backup, but Mr. Javcir was a good sounding board for me.  I talked about how my grandparents had sold the business right before their passing, since I was too young and my parents wanted to travel and how the new owners had almost destroyed it in under 3 years.  They were impressed at how I was able to not only get it back so cheaply but make it viable in just a few months.

“Before you ask, I don’t think either your company or mine would benefit from any kind of merger.  What we produce is drastically different from your products and it wouldn’t be feasible or cost-effective.” I verbalized to address the elephant in the room.

Grandpa started quizzing me on how I would handle one of the current situations Novell Industries was facing.  I fired back quick responses to each scenario he tossed my way.  After a minute he called his PA, Joyce, on his phone to take notes on my solution, because he found some very innovative and useful.  Before I left he got me to give him my lawyer’s card and asked if we can meet at his offices to discuss something very important soon.  We had a school teacher/parent conference day coming up in a week, so I told him to contact my lawyer and we could talk on that day.  Judy hugged me after telling me to call if I needed anything.  Jimmy walk me to my car and told me to text when I got home so he knew I was safe.  I nodded while giggling internally and drove home then sent a text 5 minutes later once I was inside my garage.  Yes, our houses were that close and no Evan didn’t mess with my car at all when he stormed off.  I quickly did the rest of my homework and put the clean dishes away from the dishwasher before heading to bed.

The rest of the week flew by.  By now, Harmony had decided to start joining me in the pool on nights that she didn't have cheerleading practice.  She found that not only was I really dedicated to doing water aerobics but also I’m quite good at it.  I told her it was a great way for her to keep her shape without having to do regular aerobics and she can still do her dance moves using the water to create resistance.  Evan left me alone at lunch and stop playing kissy-face with everyone.  Word was that he caught Brook with Donovan, dumped her, according to Harmony.  On Saturday afternoon, she and Gwen drove me to the mall to find a better suit, one that would fit correctly.  Since Harmony and Gwen were now the co-captain of the cheerleading squad, no one talked about their choices of friends, at least not to their faces.  Behind their backs, the mean ones that I called, “the b***h patrol”, constantly ragged on about how they had lowered themselves to be friendly with an outcast like me.  Those girls didn’t realize how wired the school was and since none of them were really that good at leading cheers.  The only thing they had going for them as they had been Gina’s friends, which is actually how they got on the squad, to begin with.  Harmony and Gwen replaced every single one of them with second-string cheerleaders who could actually do the dance routines, without falling over each other.  Once the “b***h patrol” lost their places on the squad they quickly found out that no one wanted to be friends with them anymore.  Oh, yeah, it took two hours and five stores but I left the mall with three new suits.  Gwen then joined Harmony and me in the pool at school on off practice nights, and they worked out in the weight room with me, as well, over the next month.  By now I was down another 20 lb. and for those really looking me could see my clothes were really hanging off me.  My legs and arms were getting very toned and even my gut and butt had gone down beginning to firm up.   After a few nights when there were no practices for the squad more of them basically joined us to workout in the pool.  I would call out the workout routine and they would follow along just as if we were doing a regular water aerobics class like at Gold’s Gym or the YMCA.