Loving and Loathing Thy Mate

Chapter 9 Xanda's POV

" Don't start with me, Kalen" I grunted as I stormed past him, my shoulder barging into his as I did.

I knew he would follow after me. I went to the main hall and then through that and to my studies. He walked in after me, then slammed the door behind him. I looked back over my shoulder and glared and he at least still had the brains in the head of his to shrink back a little.

" Jania is upset, she says you kicked her out of your bed, out of your chambers and told her to stay in her own chambers "he huffed. I rolled my eyes at the drama. He knows I have no time for drama, yet here he is. Bringing drama to my study. I rounded my big solid cherry oak desk nd sat down behind it, leaning back in my overly large chair. I stared at him, unmoving and unforgiving. I did it until he started fidgeting uncomfortably.

" And this is a concern of yours. Why ? " I eventually asked.

He looked at me , his eyes flashing red and I raised a brow at the disrespect he was showing me. He cleared his throat and looked down, his brows creased together. " She is my sister Xanda , I asked you when you started out with her not to. You know what she was like , how she had fawned all over you since we were kids. I asked you to wait to see if you were fated. And when you wasn't I asked you then to call it off. She thought you would take her as your chosen fated instead. If that wolf is your fated , then wouldn't it be best if you just took Jania and killed the mutt. If she is your fated then what are you waiting for ? It is not like your looking for a fated mate now. But instead you kick her out. What are your plans, Xanda ? To mate with the wolf ? " He rambled on. Until I banged my fist down on the desk and snarled.

His eyes shot up to my face and he blanched at my warning.

" My business is mine, Kalen. Your sister has many bed partners she is not interested in me more the position. You know that you have expressed that opinion to me many of time. Now, you say, how dare I kick her out of my bed? Maybe Kalen. I just find her annoying now. Maybe my interest in her has disappeared. This has nothing to do with the wolf. You can not stand Jania yourself. Yet you ask me why I am no longer interested " I asked him, and he shook his head slightly and blew out a breath.

" She is all the family I have left since mother was, well since mother was taken by their kind. I am trying to look out for her , I am trying to do right by her " he stated.

I felt my anger dwindle a little. I cleared my throat and pulled my clenched fist back off of the desk.

" Kalen , I apologise. But trust me , I am like your family too am I not ? " I asked him and he nodded.

Kalen was more involved with me and my family than he had ever been with his own. He and Jania had never gotten on. His mother had always ignored his presence for Jania too. And he had lost his father when he was just a child , when his father had gone out one day with a group of fighters and none of them had ever returned. Their remains were found mauled and dismantled near a wolf packs land. His hatred for wolves ran deep and true.

Same as my own, most of us had our own reasons as to the why we hated them.

" You are my family too Kalen , and my decision about Jania was just for me to have some space whilst I sort all of this out. I am short-tempered and not good company. I need to concentrate on what we have going off at the moment. I only told her to go back to her own chambers whilst I muddled through this. If I prove that Wolf is fated for me, I will end her and I will take Jania as a chosen mate. I have always been honest with Jania and told her if I found my fated we were over. If the fates have screwed me over and mated me to a wolf then there is nothing holding me back from Jania is there ? " I asked him.

He looked over my face and nodded. " If I take Jania , you warn her there is no more other bed partners. And I would need her word if her fated came, she would reject them for me "I told him.

" I am sure she will be more than willing. If she to be queen she would give everything else up. Xanda are you sure that is what you want , not the wolf I mean? The wolf definitely needs to die. I mean, is it Jania you want to be tied to? " I laughed at the face he made. He came here to question me about her, to protect her honor out of some guilt or whatever it was. Now he looked disgusted at the thought of it. Jania , wasn't all bad. We matched in a lot of ways; wild, crazy , s*x mad and she was a freak in the bed. Her sick sense of humor and how she got a thrill kind of satisfaction when torturing others. Yea , we matched. But she was also childlike in her behavior sometimes and that could be annoying.

" Maybe, or maybe I will go down into the village and see if I can find another girl. The last thing I will do is take a wolf as mine " I sneered and he grinned nodding. That is when it dropped , the penny. He wasn't so much worried about Jania , more like the reason behind why I sent her away. He had been worried it because I planned on mating the wolf , or growing soft toward her.

I decided to tell him the truth.

" I can not kill her though, not yet" I told him. And he frowned at me.

I sighed and sat back , rubbing my face with my hands.

" I accidentally tasted her blood "I said, and I heard him gasp. I dropped my hands and looked at him.

He looked physically sick, disgusted that I would have done such a thing. I wasn't about to tell him I tasted it by kissing her and her accidentally biting her tongue instead of mine when her senses had returned to her quicker than they had returned to me. I would not tell him that.

" You don't understand Kalen, her blood every time I tortured her has called to me. I have not felt this way since my first bloodlust. I had been resisting. When whipping her , all that blood was dripping down her back. It has been torture for me too. Then, it happened by accident. Once I got the slightest taste, I couldn't help myself then. I drank like I was back to being an out-of-control vampire. And it tasted divine, like nothing I have tasted before. I tried drinking from a blood bag and my body repelled it", I confessed to him.

He shook his head. " Then it is true, they fated you to her" he said, shocked.

I nodded "it is looking that way. She despises me as much as I despise her. There is no gain for her here. Do not worry though , I will learn to drink from another just like my father did. In the mean time, I will keep her locked up and hidden and use her as I need to. If I need to. It changes nothing, Kalen, after what her kind has done. It disgusts me too. Even if it wasn't what her pack had done , it would be centuries of her kind coming after ours. Wolves and vampires are not meant to be, the fates with whatever plan this is, is not one I am willing to partake in " I told him.

" Why would they do this though, Xanda ? Have you not thought of why they would put enemies together this way ? Some sort of plan for peace. Why not centuries ago, why now, why you with her ? " He asks me like I know the answers.

" Who knows Kalen , but I refuse to be their guinea pig" I said with conviction. A silence descended upon us. I have only been in power a short ten years. In vampire times, that was nothing. My father ruled this coven for near a hundred years. I, even after ten years, was still proving my worth. Vampires, I hate to say they, were not the most loyal. They needed a strong hand, a hand that took no cr*p. Me killing a vampire occasionally for disrespect was how I kept them in line. I kept myself apart from them, remained untouchable. With only a few, I let close.

There had been one , one that knew me like no other. I grit my teeth and removed the memory before I went into a rage.

" How is it going with them ? " I asked Kalen. He grinned , a sly sadistic grin. I found myself grinning back.

" You really must go and see for yourself "he laughed, and I thought maybe I should. It would definitely cheer me up.