Bucket List

Chapter 9 A Thing Of The Past

Alliah's marital experience in the past made her lock herself more alone. Even if there were lots of men pursuing her because of her aura, she intended not to dwell with them.

She politely explained to them why, as she didn't want anybody to misunderstand her. It's not just that she's a man hater, but rather she focused more on her career and her son as her world.

It wasn't easy for her to raise her only son and she was very grateful to her family, especially to her sisters and brothers-in-law, who used to extend their parental love to her son, Joshua.

Joshua was already 7 years old and a very obedient child. Alliah hadn't experienced any headaches from him. He already knew their family situation. The trend in today's era can easily be adopted by the younger generation.

Alliah didn't hide anything from her son and hadn't taught her son to hate her father. Even though Alliah suffered a lot during the times when she was still with Joshua's father, she still allowed her ex-husband to reach their son.

Alliah was then misunderstood by her mother. Her mother used to nag her to stop communicating with Arthur as he had caused too much chaos in her life.

"Will you listen to me, Alliah? He has nothing to do with your son anymore. He will just squeeze your money to death," Alliah's mother nagged her. She just can't explain why her daughter Alliah keeps on communicating with her ex-husband. He doesn't even share his son's tuition fees and can't even give him financial support. He gave a few bucks to buy candy for the child.

Alliah couldn't help but sigh, as she knew her mother was right. She had her reasons. Arthur is still the father of her child. She didn't want her child to grow up with a grudge toward his biological father.

"Mom, I have my reasons. Please spare me this one," Alliah asked her mother. She doesn't want her mother to get mad at her, but she can't allow the father and son's relationship to be ruined. She was sick and knew that anytime, she couldn't be with her son anymore. That's the main reason why she is not cutting off her connection with Joshua's father.

Alliah and her mother’s relationship has not been on good terms since then. She knew her mother’s side since she was already a parent now. She didn’t want anybody to bully her son either.

But now, she’s torn between her son’s future and her current relationship with her mother.

There were times when Alliah kept on crying at night. Sometimes she couldn’t just hold on to her past. It still haunts her to death.

Alliah continued then what she was doing. Packing her things and preparing to go to the grocery together with her son Joshua. She's quite pissed off at her mother's nagging all day long. She knew she couldn't control her mother's bad mouth towards her ex-husband and all she could do was leave.

"Joshua, come on," she called to her son to come along with her.

"I am coming Mommy," Joshua was so excited every time they went out. His mother, Alliah, allows him to pick whatever snacks and food he wants. Joshua is such a little foodie chubby boy.

Alliah smiled at her son and held his chubby little hand. They walked down the road and waited for a cab.

Alliah's mother couldn't help but sigh. "Alliah is born a stubborn one, task!" she told herself. She wondered how Alliah handled herself not getting angry with her situation of being a single parent and yet still considering her ex-husband as, the father of her son.

Sometimes, she wanted to pull her daughter's hair and bumped her head on a wall just to awaken her senses in reality, but she couldn't just do it as Alliah is her daughter. She is different from her other siblings. Alliah seemed to be the weakling type ever since she was a child and, unfortunately, had been in different sicknesses since then.

Alliah is so kind yet she grew up with her bullied cousins and classmates, the main reason why she distances herself from anybody, particularly boys. It's quite so sad that when she met Arthur, her former husband, she felt that their love would last for a lifetime, not realizing that her married life would be a nightmare for her. She didn't expect that what she used to watch in s drama series, a battered wife, had happened to her.

This thing of the past used to haunt her most of the time, as once in a while her ex-husband's image appeared every night when she slept. How she managed to overcome every time she was hit by his big fist, how he locked her inside their house and wrecked her. She used to come to her office before with black eyes and dark marks on her skin. She even broke her jaw after he hit her when he was drunk. She didn't inform her parents and siblings about it before.

Tears flowed down from Alliah's cheeks as she was pushing the cart of groceries when she suddenly remembered how broken she was before when she was still with Arthur. Even though her mother is quite a nagger, she's still thankful that she's living with them right now. She couldn't imagine living with Arthur with Joshua. She was afraid that Arthur's behavior would affect the growth of their child if she stayed with him.

"Mommy, why are you crying?" an innocent voice suddenly awakened my senses of Alliah. She almost forgot that they were in public places and buying their groceries.

"Hmmm, my eyes had dust, my child. I am just removing it," Alliah started to wipe off her tears and pretended that there was something in her eyes.

She continued to push the cart together with Joshua. Joshua enjoyed putting lots of snacks and beverages inside their cart.

"Mommy, is it OK if I put some yakults and delight drinks please?" he asked her mother.

"Sure, my child. Anything you want for as long as it is within our budget is okay," she said to Joshua.

Joshua is a spoiled child but not a brat. Alliah gave almost everything she could for her son's happiness. She's happy seeing how her son smiles, even if it's just small things.