Finding Solace

Chapter 12

Callum

As soon as I saw Jillian strolling down the hallway while talking animatedly to Jake of all people, I saw red. I darted forward, wanting nothing more than to punch that stupid grin off Jake's face. It was the first time I felt such uncontrollable fury towards one of my friends.

From my peripheral, I noticed Jillian eyeing me with concern, a hint of wariness also blending into her expression.

"You really don't waste time, huh?" Henry added snidely as he joined me together with Blake. Their eyes were also accusatory.

"It's not like that!" Jake rushed to say, but I didn't feel like hearing his excuses. Jillian's smile was like a precious treasure which I've been coveting for years. Yet that guy managed to get it so easily.

"Is something the matter?" Jillian asked cautiously.

"You shouldn't be fooled by the likes of him." I growled, then reached out to grip her hand in mine. She released a loud gasp but I had already turned around and started walking down the corridor, pulling her along with me.

My emotions were still chaotic, a burning possessiveness making me want to take her away from everyone else.

"Callum!" Her shout rang in my ears, pulling me from my trance.

I turned to her, my concern growing when I took in her distressed expression. We were now in a deserted hallway, the classes no doubt having already started while I was distracted.

"Let go of my hand! You're hurting me!" She exclaimed.

I looked down at her hand clutched in mine, only now noticing how swollen it was. I instantly released her.

"I'm sorry. I didn't notice." I rushed to say, guilt tearing at my chest. I couldn't believe that I was so blinded by my jealousy that I hurt her.

"It's fine." She mumbled.

"What happened?" I asked, staring at her wound in concern.

She glanced away self-consciously. "I just accidentally sprained my wrist."

Unable to help it, I reached out and carefully cradled her hand, inspecting the wound closely. "Does it hurt a lot?" I asked, my brows drawn in consternation.

I glanced up, finding her closely perusing me. "I'm taking you to the infirmary right away." I stated, but she shook her head.

"There's no need. I already applied some medicine this morning."

"What if I made it worse just now? We need to check to make sure."

"You didn't! I'm just fine."

I gave her a hard gaze. "Sorry, but I'm not backing down from this. If you keep insisting, then I'll carry you."

She stared at me in disbelief, that cute blush tingeing her cheeks.

"Fine! I'll go!" She grumbled, walking ahead of me. "Seriously what's with you guys always carrying girls around." She brooded in a low voice.

"What do you mean?"

"Jake also did the same thing." She said wearily.

"He… carried you?" My voice was unbearably tight, that overwhelming fury once again threatening to burst forth.

"Not me… he carried Marissa?"

"Marissa?"

"Yeah. I saw her getting bullied by several girls and tried to help her out. But I also ended up getting caught in the clash. In the end it was Jake who helped us out of this situation."

"So that's what happened." Suddenly my heart felt much lighter.

"When he saw that she was injured, he carried her all the way to the infirmary." She grinned. "I think he has a crush on her."

I was only vaguely listening to her words, my gaze transfixed on the arresting expression on her face. I didn't think I could ever get enough of seeing her smile.

"In fact, I'm sure of it." She went on with conviction. "When I teased him about it earlier, he got all embarrassed."

So that was why they were in such an animated discussion when I saw them. "Then… you’re not interested in Jake?”

She blinked at me in bemusement. “Me? No, I’m not! What makes you think that?”

I couldn't help my huge grin as I nonchalantly replied. "Just wondering."

The infirmary doctor was nowhere in sight so I took the initiative to find some medicine and bandages. After she quickly checked on her friend who was fast asleep, Jillian allowed me to treat her. As I checked her wrist, I felt my concern once again growing.

"Tell me if it hurts." I said as I gently applied some medicine.

"It's really not as bad as it looks." She reassured me.

"Please be more careful from now on. I can't bear to see you hurt." I murmured with emotion.

She didn't respond after this and I glanced up, finding her staring at me in astonishment. There were also other intense emotions swirling into the depths of her sparkling blue eyes. I now realized that my words were more intimate than what a friend would say. Still, I didn't bother correcting myself, returning her gaze with my own passionate one. The feelings in my chest were bursting through the surface, the need to let them out burning my throat. Right now appeared to be the perfect opportunity… I could finally confess my feelings to her. I opened my mouth to finally speak out my heart, but just then I heard a familiar voice from outside.

"It'll be fine. No one'll be here at this time." Came Daniel's crude voice.

I cast a fierce look at the door, already steeling myself to face him, but then I felt a tug on my arm. Before I could comprehend what was happening, I was pulled towards a cupboard and shoved inside. Jillian also squeezed in next to me and swiftly closed the door. The cramped space caused our bodies to be pressed together, the feel of her softness making my breathing grow labored. The sound of my wild heartbeat resonated in my ears, the pounding blood reaching to deep parts of me. I hoped she wouldn't feel my stirring desire. Right now she appeared more preoccupied with the happenings outside our small hideout.

"You're sure it's okay?" A female voice asked cautiously.

"This place is my hanging spot." Daniel replied impatiently. "No one would dare come here."

I raised a skeptical eyebrow at that. Did he think everything in this school was his personal property?

"Now enough with the useless blabber." Immediately after he uttered the words, a loud bang could be heard followed by the girl's loud gasp. The scene after that left nothing to the imagination, as the sound of heavy breathing and the rustling of clothes could be heard. Jillian's face scrunched and she peeled her eyes away from the slight opening between the wardrobe doors.

Her attention turned to our enclosed space and my lips hiked up slightly when her eyes widened as she realized our almost intimate position. Those alluring pale eyes slowly lifted to mine, an adorable blush painting her cheeks. The sight was so enticing, I had to inhale sharply to keep at bay the rush of desire which ensued. However, this caused her sweet fragrance to hit me, further dragging me down the road of heady need. All reasonable thoughts left me and I couldn't stop my head from lowering towards hers, needing to feel any connection to her.

Jillian

My heart felt like I had just run a rat race. Or was it his? In this moment, everything else became non-existent and all my thoughts turned to him. Even the reasonable voice which kept screaming that I shouldn't allow this guy too close to me was now distant and barely discernible. His face approached mine and my lips tingled with the desire to connect to his. Before I realized it, I was also breaching the distance between us. However, just then, Dan's voice boomed out, making us both freeze.

"Who's there?"

My gaze shot back towards the slight opening, my throat constricted in fear. I then noticed that Dan was facing the bed where Marissa rested and I released my pent-up breath.

"Sorry, I just woke up and was about to leave." Marissa timidly rushed out. "Sorry for disturbing." Immediately after, I heard the rushing of feet as she dashed out of the room.

Several moments of tense silence ensued after that, interrupted by a sultry female voice.

"Let's continue now?" The girl laced her arms around Dan's neck as she purred the words.

"I'm no longer in the mood now. f**k off." He growled, pushing her away.

"What the hell?" The girl shouted indignantly.

"I don't feel like f*****g your worthless hide anymore, so get the hell out of my sight."

"How dare you treat me like this!" The girl shouted back.

Unheeding to her taunt, Dan grabbed her by the hair and forcefully dragged her to the door. "When I give you an order you should f*****g listen!" He growled as he shoved her out of the room. "Don't let me see your face again." He sneered down at her before slamming the door shut.

I stared warily as he raked his hand in his hair in frustration. When he was in that state, it did bode well at all. My hand lifted on its own accord to clutch Callum's shirt. His own palm covered mine, stroking my skin in silent reassurance.

Dan suddenly retrieved his phone to make a call. My eyes widened when I saw my phone lighting up in my bag which I had dumped into the closet as well. I hoped Dan wouldn't notice the faint light illuminating the closet. The minutes where he kept pacing while trying to reach me were endless. At some point, Callum's arms circled around my back to stroke me reassuringly and I basked in the comfort he offered. I couldn't even be bothered that his touch caused pressure on my sore back. Dan eventually lost his patience and threw his phone against a wall so violently, it shattered in pieces. He then threw on his shirt and stalked out of the room. I sighed in relief as soon as the door closed behind him, and slowly crept out of the wardrobe.

"Why do you appear so scared of your brother?" Callum asked as he also stepped out.

"I'm not scared of him. It's just…" I darted a distressed gaze over his bruised face before speaking on. "If he reacted like this because you looked at me once then, what would he do if he saw you together with me."

"So you're scared for me?" He asked in a low tone.

"Of course I am! I don't want you to get hurt because of me again."

He stared at me intensely as he slowly approached me. "I don't mind even if I get hurt." He said sincerely. "As long as I get to be with you."

I could only gape at him as his words turned my heart into a jumbled mess. The reality of what just transpired finally caught up to me. I told myself that I would just befriend Callum, but the way we were acting was obviously not like friends. He seemed to want something more from me and my feelings also seemed to be turning to something beyond what I wanted. I thought about the way I reacted to him just now. And from yesterday… the way I hugged his jacket desperately for the whole night. Even now I held it captive in my closet. I couldn't allow this to go on.

"Jillian." Callum suddenly said. "There's something I've been wanting…"

"We shouldn't keep seeing each other." I blurted, cutting off his words.

He blinked in disbelief. "What? Why?" His words came out almost as a shout.

"It would be for the best. You know how my brother can be uncontrollable. I don't want to create more trouble."

"It's not a trouble at all." He argued.

"It is for me." I said in a hard voice.

He grit his teeth, hurt displaying across his burning eyes. "So you'll let your brother control your life just like this?"

"I'm not letting him control anything. This is my own decision." I glanced away as I delivered my finishing blow. "Sorry but I can't do this after all."

I kept my gaze turned away so he wouldn't notice the pain which lanced my heart. I had to drive him away before things reached a point of no return. Because if that happened, the only result would be total ruin.

I felt his burning eyes on me for several unnerving minutes until he mumbled a brief "Fine." and walked out of the room.

My eyes burned, every beat of my heart pulsating with pain. I remained standing there for some time, mourning internally. I kept telling myself that this was for the best. I did it for his own good, but it still didn't lessen the gnawing feeling inside me.