Tasmina's Tale

11. Near You

Tasmina

He seemed somehow bigger in our home, the sheer size of him seeming to fill up the small space. My heart was thumping louder than a herd of elephants walking and I wondered if he could hear it. As the silence grew louder, he seemed comfortable enough to just stare at me. 

“I… thank you for coming to see me today,” I blurted. 

Goddess, what was the matter with me. I fought and haggled with fully grown men and here I was, crumbling under the gaze of a nearly man. 

“It was not a kindness, I assure you. I have thought of nothing but you since you left the palace more than a week ago.” 

His words were assured; he didn’t hesitate when he spoke. There was something undeniably attractive about it. As if I wasn’t already drawn to him. Panthers are known to hypnotise their prey with a stare and he was certainly more panther than wolf. He sighed deeply, before leaning back. 

“I actually came now because I may not get the chance to come again.”

I felt a weight drop in my stomach. 

“Why?” I whispered, feeling as though the breath had been knocked from me. 

“My father is sending me to Bulan to learn from a renowned warrior. I will live with him for at least a year, most likely more,” he said, regretfully. 

I composed myself. I had hoped to see much more of him before our eighteenth birthdays. 

“I see… well, I wish you well on your travels,” I said, smiling with great difficulty. 

“May I still link you in the evenings?” he asked. 

“I… I had hoped… well, yes,” I stuttered. 

I was relieved. I had wondered if I would still hear his voice if he was going to be so involved in such intense training. He smiled with a relief that reflected my own. 

“I am glad,” he said. 

He rose suddenly and I stood from the armchair.

“Are you leaving?” I asked, struggling to keep the disappointment from my voice. 

“No… I just… I was going to get water,” he replied, raising his brow before smiling. “Although I’m pleased you don’t want me to.” 

“I… I didn’t say I didn’t want you to leave,” I said, stubbornly. 

“So you do want me to leave?” he asked, taking a step towards me. 

“I… well, I didn’t say that either,” I murmured, suddenly feeling far too warm. 

His scent was sweet and heady, I could think of little else when he stood so close to me. 

“Well then, Tasmina, what do you want?” he asked, growing dangerously closer. 

He was so… big. I felt cornered, but there was nowhere else I wanted to be. His eyes kept me rooted to the spot; I couldn’t look away. 

“I… want to know why… why me?” I asked, almost gasping for air as he invaded my senses. 

“Why you what?” he asked, his voice low as he stood inches from me, towering over me. 

“Why… am I your mate?” 

I hadn’t noticed his hand come up, but when his thumb traced along my jaw, I gasped at the heat his touch spread through my body. 

“Your eyes have captured my soul. They carry the peace of the night in them, and I wish to lose myself in them. Every night I see you in my dreams. You’re all I know… I couldn’t let go of you even if I wanted to. I have tried to deny that I need you, but still you invade my thoughts even in my waking moments,” he murmured. 

“So… so you wish to deny me?” I murmured, struggling to gain the upper hand. 

The truth was I was melting into Mama’s living room floor and there was little I could do to stop it. When his mouth curled up at one side in a half smile, it seemed to sap all the strength from my knees and I struggled to stand upright. 

“To deny you would be to deny myself of air,” he replied.

Goddess, he was making me dizzy. 

“What you said about not being my property… you were right. You’re not my property. But you are mine,” he said. 

If he grew any closer to me, I would start panting. Even still, I jutted out my chin. 

“You cannot just claim me.” 

He wound his arm around my waist and pulled me tight against his body and the breath left my lungs in a rush. 

“Oh, I can. I will. The way you have laid claim to me. All I think of is you and when I can next be near you.” 

He leaned down and, like he did the first time we had met, ran his nose up along my neck without so much as touching me. His arm around my waist was the only thing stopping me from completely collapsing to the floor. It seemed any control I had over my own body was nonexistent. 

“I will lay claim to your every thought, the way you have laid claim to mine. You will think of me, you will yearn for my touch the way I yearn for yours. In two years, when we meet again, you will be mine. The way I am yours.” 

“I… I’m…” 

My throat was dry as I tried to form words. He tilted his head to the side and leaned in slowly, as though to kiss me, and my lips parted in anticipation. He stopped suddenly and a smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. 

“It seems… your mother has walked off her lunch.”

With that, he took a slow step away from me, releasing his grip on my waist. 

“What?” I whispered.

It was only when he’d sat down and left me standing in the middle of the floor that the door opened and my family walked in. They were laughing, clearly in the middle of a conversation. 

They paused when they saw me. 

“Mina, why are you standing in the middle of the room?” Felan asked, his brow furrowing. 

“I… well… I’m…” 

Oh goddess, this was humiliating. I was flustered, my words refusing to come, my skin still burning from his touch that had been there only moments before. 

“I was just going to get a glass of water and Tasmina kindly offered to get it for me instead,” Prince Rikom said, looking up at me expectantly. “Isn’t that right?” 

“Yes. Yes, I am,” I spluttered, turning quickly to grab the jug of water. 

If he had heard them coming when I didn’t, then surely he could hear the sound of my heart as it thumped loudly in my chest. 

“How was your walk?” he asked them politely. 

The rest of the conversation was lost to me under the sound of my heart beating in my ears as I handed him the glass of water, his fingers gently, but very deliberately, stroking against mine as he took it from me. 

When I perched again on Mama’s armchair, she put a soothing hand on my back and I felt my heartbeat return to normal somewhat. We spoke of their walk, which somehow turned into a tale of Felan being the naughtiest child Mama had ever come across, while I wasn’t too far behind. Prince Rikom laughed along, enjoying the tales that Mama told, interjecting with questions about me, seemingly fascinated and wanting to learn all he could. As the afternoon grew to evening, Mama brought out mint tea and honey and we sat together, laughing and sipping as he told us stories of his brother, Rodin, who seemed far removed from the formal prince that Prince Rikom seemed to be. 

“Every family has one,” Mama said, shaking her head at Felan. 

“Every family needs one,” Felan corrected, and we all laughed. 

Once the tea was finished, Prince Rikom looked outside. I knew what he was going to say, but I still felt the pang of disappointment when he stood.

“I’m afraid I have far outstayed my welcome. I thank you for such a wonderful evening, all of you. I do not remember ever laughing so much.” 

He stood up, saluting Faris who returned the gesture. When he attempted to salute Felan, my brother grabbed him in a tight hug, surprising him. Mama and I walked him to the door. 

“Miya, your hospitality is unmatched,” he said, gifting her with a smile. 

To both our surprise, she held his face and he bowed his head, allowing her to kiss his forehead. 

“You are always welcome here, Rikom. It was my pleasure to finally know you.” 

He was startled, his eyes darting between me and Mama. 

“Mina, why don’t you walk our guest to the gate,” Mama said, winking at me. 

I blushed despite myself, and walked out of the front door with him. Mama closed the door behind us. It was barely ten paces from our door to the gate, but we walked slowly, neither of us wanting the evening to end. He stopped by the gate, his eyes blacking out and I knew he was linking someone from his entourage to escort him back to the palace. There was something on my mind and I needed to say it before he left.

“Say it,” he said.

How did he know? My confusion must have shown on my face. His mouth curled into that crooked smile that made my knees turn to yoghurt. 

“I noticed your brows furrow when you’re thinking too much,” he said, his voice gentle. 

He moved a stray curl from my face and my breath caught at the intimacy of the gesture. 

“I… well… two years is a long time, Prince Rikom. Especially for a man. If you feel as though you must… what I mean to say is that… if you feel you cannot wait and must take another lover in Bulan… I wouldn’t begrudge you.”

He looked confused for a moment.

“Do you wish to take another lover?” he asked.

I could tell from how he spoke that he was restraining his anger and I shook my head quickly.

“No, it’s not that. I’m far too busy with training and my chores with Mama. But… I have heard of how it is within the palace, especially for royalty. And if… well, if it becomes too much for you…”

I stopped speaking abruptly as he held my face in his hands, his thumb trailing across my lower lip. There it was again, that warmth spreading through my body at his touch. 

“I will wait for you,” he murmured. 

He leaned down and once again, I waited for him to kiss me. Instead, he pressed his lips against my forehead. 

“I will see you very soon, my love.” 

With that, he turned quickly on his heel and disappeared into the night.