Darkness

Chapter 6

Laynie

I listen to everything Dr. Toring is telling us later on the next day. We are all set to go home and are getting instructions on how to care for ourselves privately. We both have express orders not to strain ourselves too much and to make sure we take our pain medication as needed. Jared is hunched over tying his shoes that his best friend Alan brought over. He is having a hard time bending over from the bed, but Alan makes no move to help him. I think he understands that Jared needs to do certain things himself, to not make him feel like he is dependent on us. Alan and Anna were our best friends in high school and college. When we moved to New York we continued to stay close, but I can tell Alan tried harder than Jared did.

When Alan called Jared's phone last night, I knew I had to let him know what was going on. Jared was in a lot of pain, even though he wouldn't say. So, me and nurse Candice had a silent conversation, and five minutes later she came in the room with his pain medicine. He was out within minutes.

Once Alan found out what happened, and after 45 minutes of reassuring him that he didn't need to fly out, he booked the next flight out to New York. See, Alan is not the kind of man that will stay still when someone else's world is shaking. I guess that's why I have always respected his friendship with Jared. Alan has no idea what Jared has done to me these past 12 months, so I wanted to make sure neither of us slipped. When Jared woke up this morning I was petrified to tell him Alan called, that I answered his phone, that I told him what happened, that Alan was on his way over as we speak, and that he couldn't tell Alan that he was abusive towards me.

However, like everything else that has been strange since this whole ordeal went down, Jared just smiled and said thank-you. His smile was genuine, I just couldn't look at it for very long. I needed to prepare for when the real Jared resurfaces.

"He needs to rest as much as possible from his injuries. Although I am no neurologist, I can assure you that certain things do tend to reassure him. It does not mean his memory is back." Dr. Toring says dragging me from my thoughts.

I look at Alan speaking quietly with Jared then back at Dr. Toring, my confused state must have alarmed him because he elaborates his original statement.

"Basically, what I am saying is there are certain things he may remember. Where he lives, where his car is parked, how to get to work, even the smallest little thing like where the bathroom is in your home. That does not mean his memory is back. I must stress that. It's just the act of the routine itself that he may be accustom to. Dr. Jones will go over in detail what I mean once he makes your appointment sometime next week."

Nurse Candice comes in and gives us our discharge paperwork. Mine is pretty much the same as Jared's, rest and take my pain meds at certain times. I get ready to say goodbye to nurse Candice, who has been very kind to us these last few days, when I see her look towards Jared. Her look seems to last a while before she looks back at me and smiles sadly. Then she walks out the door. Dr. Toring looks at her fleeting form and shakes his head slightly, he must notice I am looking in his direction because he puts on a phony smile, he then turns to leave as well. That was strange. I'm used to women looking a certain flirtatious way towards Jared. He is sexy, tall, with broad shoulders, dark hair and a scruff on his jawline that feels amazing between my thighs. The man is beautiful, even if his heart may not be anymore.

Candice's look seems almost desolate. Like she wanted to say something important but chickened out. I shake my head at the thought. they just met two days ago. Besides, I know Jared wasn't always faithful in our marriage. I should have been a better wife to him. It was my fault. I look towards Alan who is attempting to help Jared stand. Dammit, I should have been doing that instead of standing here day dreaming. Jared is always telling me to get my head out of the clouds. I walk over shamefully, and offer my shoulder for him to lean on as well.

"It's okay babe, I got Alan's scrawny shoulders to lean on." He says giving me a reassuring smile.

Alan throws his head back and laughs pretending to push Jared back on the bed.

"Careful fuckwad, I could drug you with these pills and take you back home to Minneapolis to my mamma." He jokes, putting the pill bottle in Jared's bag with his left hand. Alan's mother is amazing. Anna, Jared and I use to always lean on her. She has five children altogether and they are all close in age. She practically adopted us into their family. In doing so, she is extremely protective of us. If she knew Jared and I were in the hospital from an attack, there is no doubt in my mind she would be here right now yelling at the staff for not pampering us more.

"Don't even joke about that" Jared says laughing. "And don't curse in front of Laynie."

I forgot that Jared use to hate when people cursed in front of me. Before two days ago all I ever got out of his mouth for a year was the f-bomb. I try and give him a smile back but I think it just comes out like my mouth is numb from Lidocaine. We each head to the exit and waiting elevators. I pull my phone out to call us a cab when Alan grabs it from me and tells me that he rented us a van.

"You know I have to have the best for my boo." He blows a kissy face at Jared.

Jared gives a little chuckle and head shake. We head in the direction Alan leads us to, and get into the van that looks like it will fit ten people. I sit in the back with Jared, who is more lying on the seat than sitting. He looks up at me and goes to grab my hands. I let him put his left one in my right. I stare at the calloused hands in mine and for a brief moment, wonder if he really is different. We stay that way for a few minutes, the feeling of holding onto him this way is surreal. I almost feel at peace with him like this when suddenly the car jerks. Alan blares his horn not used to New York City traffic and its pedestrians. Jared nearly falls off the seat and in that instant I see who my husband is all over again.

"Hey asshole what the f**k is your problem. If you can't f*****g drive this big ass bus, then don't f*****g rent it. Watch what you're doing!" Jared yells.

His grasp on my hand is so tight that I can no longer feel the blood flowing through it. I am terror-stricken. I knew it wouldn't last. He is back, and when we get home I am in for it. Alan looks back at us in the rearview mirror and stares right at Jared. I catch a glimpse of Jared rubbing his eyes and shaking his head and can feel the tension leaving his hand. I don't dare look right at him.

"f**k, sorry man. Must be these damn meds that have me on." he says with a small smile.

Alan just smiles and continues to drive. Jared looks at me and his expression is that of concern. He then looks at his hand grasping mine tightly, and jumps back.

"f**k, Laynie I'm so sorry. I swear I don't know what came over me.I-I didn't hurt you, did I?" he asks worriedly.

I give him a small head shake as I massage my hand behind my back. I glance over at Alan who is again looking at me through the rearview mirror.

"It's okay, I'm fine." I lie with a small smile, hoping to release his and Alan's concern from their faces.

When we get near home I look over at Jared to see if he is really back and just playing nice since Alan's here, or if he really is just tired from the meds. He doesn't look like he remembers the area. He is looking around quite a bit so I'm guessing it's the latter. I'm too afraid to consider the other option.