Whispers of Refuge Box Set

CHAPTER 13-2

Roger Stern steeled himself against the breeze and hurried past the lane of houses. His neighborhood was peopled almost exclusively with expats, mostly European or American businessmen like himself. He tightened his beige pea coat against his chest and pressed on.

Of all the days for one of his printers to fry on him, it had to be today. Not only was his wife planning a huge ceremony and elaborate buffet to send the Secret Seminary students off, but he needed to ship out his largest order of the quarter by tomorrow for it to arrive in New York on schedule. Roger would have to go back to the office right after the graduation ended and probably pull an all-nighter to guarantee the books got out in time.

What a day. Of course, Juliette had to get herself so wrapped up in this ceremony she went so far as to order caps and gowns for the students they were sending out. Caps and gowns — as if the graduates’ decision to return to the most hostile mission field on the globe was a reason to celebrate. On the other hand, it was exactly something his wife would dream up. She was never one to do things small-scale. When their daughter Kennedy asked to ride a horse a decade earlier, Juliette didn’t take her to the kiddie corral for a five-minute spin on the pony-go-round. No, Juliette made arrangements for their eight-year-old to take riding lessons for the entire school year, and that summer would have convinced Roger to buy Kennedy a horse of her own if they hadn’t already been packing up their things to move to China.

Roger waved to his security man, Benjamin, who lately had been doubling as a landscaper, and strode into his house. The scent of soy sauce and ginger wafted through the entryway in greeting, along with the tantalizing sound of meat sizzling in the kitchen. He wondered at the irony of this feast even as his mouth watered. Wasn’t it cruel in a way to stuff the graduates with such fine cooking just hours before they crossed the border into a land ravaged by famine and scarcity? He inhaled deeply and wondered if all cultures had a last-meal tradition for their condemned.

“Hello, Eve.” Roger handed his hat and scarf to the housekeeper. “Is Mrs. Stern already in the den?” Eve nodded, and he headed upstairs. Since he was late, he expected to find the students already in their ridiculous graduation get-ups and was surprised to find the den empty except for Simon. Upon entry to the Secret Seminary, each refugee was given a new name. Their christening served as a reflection of their new identity as Christian believers as well as a safeguard for those who had illegally crossed the border into China.

“Hello, Mr. Stern.” Simon bowed his head, and the tassel on his graduation cap toppled into his eye.

Roger grinned as the young man fiddled with the mess of strings. “Here, let me straighten that up for you.”

Simon thanked him and shrugged his shoulders. “I think Mrs. Stern ordered these in American sizes.” He held up his arms to show his sleeves, which hung so far down they covered his hands completely.

Roger patted him on the back. “A tradition. When a student works hard enough to earn his degree, the people in charge want to make sure he’s as uncomfortable as possible so he doesn’t sleep through his own graduation.”

Simon returned the smile, but his eyes were fixed on the door. Roger glanced behind him. “Are you expecting someone?” A deep, almost maroon blush crept up the sides of Simon’s face. “I take it then that you haven’t talked with her?” Roger asked.

Simon rubbed his forehead. “Who?”

Roger wondered how much redder the man’s face could grow. “I think we both know who we’re talking about. Or do you want me to force that blush all the way up to your eyebrows by saying her name?”

“Don’t!” Simon let out an awkward chuckle, but his stare never wavered.

“Fine,” Roger agreed. “I’m sorry. But tell me now. Did you have a chance to talk with ... with a certain graduate we’ve discussed before at length?”

Simon’s head wagged from side to side like the tail of that little yippy Schnauzer Juliette bought for their daughter so many years ago. Roger put his hand on Simon’s shoulder. “You’re running out of time, don’t you think? Are you going to wait until after the ceremony to talk to her?” Simon’s head continued on its horizontal track. Roger felt dizzy just trying to maintain eye contact. “You’ll never know if you never ask.”

Simon lowered his eyes. “It’s not that. I asked her already.”

Roger raised his eyebrows. “And?”

Simon sighed. “She’s got her heart set on going home.”

“She’s a very brave young woman.”

“The bravest.”

Roger stared straight at Simon. “You don’t want to leave, do you?”

Simon didn’t meet his gaze. “I hate to think of what might happen to her. She’s so young. So innocent. And she’s going out all by herself ...”

Roger didn’t feel like rehashing all the reasons it was safer to send the graduates out solo instead of in groups. “So she won’t change her mind, then? Even after you talked with her?”

“No.”

“And you told her everything? Including how you feel?”

Simon lowered his gaze until Roger could only see his eyelids. “I told her I didn’t want to see her hurt.”

“But did you tell her how you feel about her?” Roger pressed.

Simon threw both hands up. His sleeves cascaded down to his shoulders. “She must know it by now.”

Roger shook his head. He would have smiled at the young man’s fears if the issue weren’t far more complicated than a simple crush. Lives were at stake. And once the graduates left tonight, they wouldn’t be coming back. Roger thought about when he first met Juliette, how terrified he had been, how convinced he was that a girl so confident and beautiful and sophisticated deserved to find someone well-off and well-bred, someone exactly the opposite of him. It had taken him three months just to work up the nerve to invite her to the movies. Sometimes Roger wondered what might have happened if he had never found his courage. He was about to respond to Simon when two other graduates entered the den, their tasseled caps painfully askew and their limbs completely swallowed up by their billowy gowns.

“Well, I guess it’s time,” Roger sighed.

“Yeah,” Simon agreed. “I guess it is.”

***

* * * *

After the ceremony, Juliette handed the graduate a small envelope. “I can’t even begin to describe how proud I am of you, Brother Simon.” He lowered his head. Although he was only in his mid-twenties, Simon was one of the oldest students graduating tonight. Juliette studied his features one last time. She had grown used to him knocking on their bedroom door at all hours of the night, impatient to ask her husband some deep theological question that couldn’t wait for morning. Simon was bright and quite skilled, so skilled the Sterns had even offered to help him relocate to the States and pastor a Korean-American church. He had refused.

Juliette tried to give him a parting smile, but she had to bite down to keep her chin from quivering. He bowed to her as he accepted the money. “May God bless you for your generosity,” he whispered.

She squeezed her eyes shut. She had already shed enough tears during the ceremony itself. She didn’t want the graduates’ last memory of her to be maudlin. After all, she was the one staying here in the relative safety of Yanji. She took a deep, quivering breath.

“It’s been an honor and a joy to see you grow,” she finally managed to murmur, but Simon wasn’t looking at her. He stood with his hands limp by his side, gaping at Hannah, whose singing during the ceremony was what had set off Juliette’s tears in the first place. Juliette observed him discreetly as he walked up to the young woman, who stood by the window that overlooked the Sterns’ garden.

He stood behind her for an awkward moment and then cleared his throat. “So I suppose this is good-bye.”

Juliette lowered her gaze but still heard Hannah’s sweet soprano in reply. “There are no good-byes in the kingdom of heaven.”

Juliette turned away to give them some privacy. This wasn’t the kingdom of heaven yet, but she wasn’t about to break the news to the young couple.

***

* * * *

Roger’s belly threatened to pop the button right off his pants, but he put on his overcoat and leaned over to kiss his wife on the cheek. “That was a wonderful feast, Baby Cakes.”

She pouted. “You going already?”

“Yeah,” he sighed, “I’ve got to get that order ready to go out tomorrow.” He pecked her once more on the other cheek and then left before she could voice any more arguments. It was chilly, and Roger thought about the graduates who would be crossing the Tumen River into North Korea.

Roger waved good-bye to his security guard who was raking the front lawn. Benjamin was a whole head taller than the other refugees, which is why he worked security. It wasn’t necessarily the thugs and thieves Roger worried about. Most of them didn’t bother with the high-end neighborhoods. But the Sterns’ work with North Korean refugees was technically illegal and not something the Chinese would approve of if they caught wind of it.

So far, the Sterns had done what they could to remain in the good graces of the Chinese bureaucrats. They submitted all their paperwork on time and took excessive pains to make sure everything stayed in impeccable order. Still, Roger was grateful he didn’t have to leave his wife and young housekeeper unprotected. He lifted the collar of his coat up against the breeze and headed back to work.

***