The Thunder Wolves MC - Sophia (Book #4)

4

Sue

17 years ago

I thought being a mom would be the best thing in the world. But if I was honest with myself and everyone, I hated every second of it. I was a young mom and thought this was what I wanted, but I hated my life as the days went by. I grew to hate the guy I loved. I found everything my daughter did annoyed the hell out of me. I just wanted to go and have fun with my friends and found myself resenting John. He was such a good father, and our daughter loved him. The moment he got home from work, Sophia would jump on him and insist she would have his attention, and he would give in and take over taking care of her. Even though he worked all day and I had been home, he insisted I take the afternoons off and do what I wanted for myself. But even that wasn’t enough, to just do what I wanted at home. So I started going out with my friends, and at first, that wasn’t an issue. He never once complained. It was the best, and I began to grow to like my life again. And then I met Steve and well thought he loved me. He made me feel sexy again, and sneaking around with him was easy when John never asked where I was going or who I was going with. He trusted me and wanted me to be happy. Then Steve left me for someone else, and I found Jake. Again I found sneaking around with him was easy. John never said anything when I went out. I was so young and blinded by the fact I thought I loved Jake that I didn’t want to be anywhere but with him, and because of that, I made the biggest mistake of my life. One I grew to hate myself for over the years. 

It was Friday, and John was supposed to have been home over an hour ago. I was late for my date, and Jake was starting to get upset. I was so angry at John. How dare he do this to me. Sophia was in her room playing on her waiting for her father to get home. She was a good kid and was fine on her own. In fact, as long as I made sure the house was locked up, she would most likely not even notice she was alone. She would be just fine until her father got home. At that moment, I decided I would get her favorite snack, a bowl of goldfish, and a cup of water. I took it up to her room, gave it to her, then went back down to make sure the doors were all locked and left the house. John would be home soon, and all would be just fine. I didn’t think anything of it as I met up with Jake and had fun. I never once thought twice about leaving my five-year-old daughter by herself. What would happen in the short time between me leaving and John getting home? 

That question would be answered quickly. As I arrived home late that night, I found John still up, and he looked pissed. I had never seen him look so angry. “Where the hell were you?” Anger flew through me quickly. “I was out. I told you I had plans.” His pissed-off look only darkened more with that answer. “ARE YOU f*****g KIDDING ME?” This only made me angrier. How dare he. “Don’t yell at me. You will wake Sophia up.” He moved so fast across the room I didn’t see him move until he was right in front of me.

“Sophia isn’t here, Sue. You left her by herself. She is only five years old, Sue anything could have happened to her. The police were called when the neighbor heard her crying and came to check and see if everything was ok. When they realized neither of us was here, they called the cops. I didn’t get home for another couple of hours, and by then, they had already taken her. How could you do something so stupid and selfish? What was so important you couldn’t have waited for me to get home? Who did you have to see so f*****g bad you would risk our daughter's life?” Relief filled me. Sophia was gone, and now I could go and have fun all day tomorrow and not have to spend all day taking care of her. It was a feeling I would hate myself for years later. With that relief came anger at him for not getting home shortly after I left. “Where the hell were you? Why were you not here?” He threw his hands up in the air, letting them fall back to his sides. “I was at work, Sue, you know damn good and well where I was. The f*****g question is, where the f**k were you?” I was tired of this conversation. Turning, I started up the stairs, but I didn’t get far. John grabbed my arm and pulled me back, pinning me to a wall. “Answer me, Sue, because, for the life of me, I can’t think of any reason you would leave our five-year-old home alone.” I pushed him back. It didn’t take much strength. He wasn't trying to hold me there against my will as much as he was trying to get me to answer him. “Screw you, John. If you had been home on time, this would have never happened. But now that it has, good.” Shock filled his face, but I didn’t stop. “Maybe they will keep the little brat, and I can finally live my life instead of being stuck here listening to her whining over the stupidest things all day long.”

I pushed on his chest again, pushing him back another step. “With her gone, nothing is keeping me here anymore. I should have done this a long time ago.” Anger flashed in his eyes again as he pushed me back again. “If you hated it here so f*****g bad, then you might as well just f*****g leave. I plan on getting our daughter back, so if you want to be free of her and me, then now is your chance.” With those words, he let me walk away from him. I stomped up the stairs, but his voice stopped me halfway up. “But Sue, you chose to leave. That's it. You're gone. I won't let you come in and out of her life confusing her. You are either in or out, so make sure this is really what you want.” I didn’t respond as I finished my way up the stairs. 

Going straight to our bedroom, I started throwing everything I could into bags. He never came upstairs. A few hours later, once I had everything packed, I headed down with them to find him passed out on the couch. Laying on the table were several beer bottles. I rolled my eyes and left, leaving him there. I went to Jakes only to find a less than warm welcome to being there. In fact, when I got to his place, I found him there with someone else. I was so pissed off I left there, and with nowhere else to go, I lived on the streets for a few weeks.

Never once did I consider going back to John or Sophia. Instead, I took to panhandling and was able to get enough money saved up by skipping a few meals to hop on a bus and leave town. It took me a few years to realize what I had actually done and realize I wished to have my family back. But by then, it was too late. I tried to beg John to take me back, but he wouldn’t hear it and shut me down at every turn. Around that time, I met Rooster and told him everything, and he helped me from a distance to keep track of Sophia. When she was nine, she had been taken and placed into foster care, and I tried then to gain custody of her. But with what happened before when she was five, the judge wouldn’t hear it, and I was shut down quickly. After that, she was sent back to live with her dad. So for the last fourteen or fifteen years, I have watched my daughter from afar. But even that seemed to prove we hadn’t seen everything. Rooster had a few men that were good at tracking people, and with how everything is electronic nowadays, they were able to pull up as much information about her as they could. But we could never figure out what she did for the publishing company. We could see they deposited a lot of money into her account, but they didn’t have her listed as an employee. And then, a few years ago, we completely lost track of her and John. It was like they both just fell off the grid. 

Now

I always liked to check in with my customers after decorating their homes. My most recent client had only seen pictures of my work and had sent a significant bonus based on those pictures. So when the guys reported this morning to Rooster that someone had arrived at the home last night, I wanted to check in with them and make sure everything was, in fact, ok. While I knocked on the door, Rooster stood across the street at Jax’s house with a few of the other guys bullshitting. With no one answering the door, I was just turning to head back over to the guys. I would have to try again another time. But at that moment, a car pulled into the drive. I headed down to speak with the woman in the car, but the closer I got to the woman that climbed out of the vehicle, the smile I had started to fall. She looked so familiar. Her eyes, in particular, looked so much like those of my first love and father to the daughter I left behind. They were the same gray color as his. Swallowing hard, I forced myself to speak. “Miss Woods?” She nodded, “Can I help you?” No, this woman couldn’t be her. It had to just be a coincidence. I was disappointed a bit and forced a smile on my face. “Oh, we spoke over the phone a few times. My name is Sue. I just wanted to stop by and make sure everything was truly to your liking.” She smiled at me, “Oh yes, thank you again. You did a wonderful job.” I nodded, truly happy she was happy with my work. My smile grew slightly, but I wasn’t able to hold it for long. It was so hard to let it go. This woman looked so familiar. “I am sorry but have we ever met in person before? I mean not to sound forward or anything, but you look nothing like the pictures that can be found online when your name is typed into the search.” She nodded, “Oh yes, I do apologize. Being a well-known writer at such a young age, I decided to use a pen name, and the pictures found online are of one of my friends who was more than happy to be in the spotlight so I may live peacefully. If you search the name Rose Woods, you will find my friend Gloria  Anderson. My real name is Sophia Kian. I do apologize for the confusion.” I wanted so much to pull her into a huge hug. It was her. My little girl. She was successful. She was beautiful and smart. But did she know who I was? If she did, how would I explain to her why I left. Would she understand I was young and stupid and regretted that day so much and I tried to get her back? What if she hated me and didn’t really want anything to do with me. Quickly I decided to keep my mouth shut for now. “Oh dear, that makes sense and truly understandable.” We stood watching each other for a few moments. I didn’t know what to say. There was so much I wanted to say. I wanted to beg her to forgive me for being so stupid, but the words just wouldn’t form in my mouth. She broke our silence after a few minutes. “Well, I should be getting these groceries inside.” With her words, I realized I was holding her up. I nodded. “Oh yes, I am sorry for keeping you. It was really nice to meet you, and I am glad you are liking the place. Please let me know if there is anything you would like to change.” She nodded, “Thank you again, and I will do that.” I had to force myself to leave her. I made my way back across the street. 

Walking straight over to Rooster, I tried to hide the fact I was now upset I didn’t say anything to her. My baby girl was in the same town as me. She grew up to be such a beautiful young woman. I was so proud of her. She was a fantastic writer. After hiring me, the guys looked her up. I got a couple of her books and read them. They were among the best I had ever read. Rooster wrapped his arm around me as I reached him, stopping his conversation with the guys. “Everything ok?” I nodded, “Think I just want to go home.” He nodded and said his goodbyes to the guys and took me home without a word. He waited until we got home to question me, but I didn’t wait for him to voice his question. “Her name is really Sophia Kian. She uses the name Rose Woods so she can live her life out of the view of her fans. The picture that is attached to the name she uses is actually one of her friends that were willing to be in the spotlight for her.” I don’t know why I started to cry, but I did. Rooster pulled me into him, hugging me. “That’s a good thing, right?” I nodded.