My Laughable Fate

12. She’s hurt

LEIA POV

He must really hate me. “He doesn’t want us. It’s obvious he hates us… let’s just go.” Sian said dejectedly. It surprised and relieved me that she had finally accepted what I had seen all along. It’s not that I’m not hurt, but… I’ve trained myself to hide physical and emotional pain very well. Warriors don’t cry.

My mother would tell you that’s bullshit and, since she’s seen battle, she thinks she’s the expert. But a battle is easy compared to living day in and day out with wolves that think they are better and stronger than you because they were born with a d**k. In this world, shewolves must work twice as hard, just as human women do in their world.

Crying will get you labeled emotional and dramatic. You would think that right now would be the moment that I can finally be me. Let all my feelings and emotions without fear of judgment or humiliation. As my mate, he should make me feel safe enough to do that. Yet, he doesn’t. In fact, it feels a lot like when I’m surrounded by wolves I don't know or an enemy even. My guard is up.

All our interactions or lack thereof have inspired little to no trust in him. He’s made his very selfish and piggish decision. He expects me to accept it like a good little, soon to be rejected, mate. “No. We can’t keep feeling like this for… s**t! The full moon was yesterday. That means it will be a month before the next full moon.” I groaned out loud and he grinned.

Instead of reacting the way I wanted to, which was to yell and scream at him, I weighed my options. “I know you’re hurting right now Sian, but I need you. He’s got the upper hand, and I can’t fall apart.” There was no way I would allow myself to show weakness in front of him. She managed to push back her pain and I felt her strength combine with mine.

Good because things were going one of two ways. I could reject him right now like he said and leave here feeling like my heart was cracked but still holding on by a thread. While he would feel a tenth of my pain. Then I would have to wait for him to grace me with a rejection.

Or I could wait for him. Either way, he was pinning me in a corner. That does not sit well with me or Sian one bit. There are several things I can do to f**k up his world, but all of them have consequences. Not only for him, but for me too. I had to pick the one that left me sitting the prettiest in the end.

“Ima hit pause right here.” A smile grew on his face, and I wanted to smack myself for giving him that small victory. “To be clear, that does NOT mean I concede to your demands.” I held his gaze to let him know I wasn’t playing on that score. He managed to contain the glee I could see in the corner of his eyes. Jackass.

I rolled my eyes and stepped away from him, making my way to the door. A sigh of relief left his lips, and a smile grew on mine. Stopping in front of the door, and then turned to face him. Some of the color had returned to his face and he looked very pleased with himself. I’m not opposed to losing a small battle to win the war, but there was no way I was leaving him feeling this victorious.

When he felt my eyes on him, his body went ridged and he pursed his lips. “Don’t let your balls crawl out of your ass just yet, Alpha. I am a very resourceful shewolf who doesn’t need thirty days to f**k up your program. If you insist on keeping me tied to you, I will have no choice but to show you exactly what you idiotically gave up.” I chuckled and shot him a grin before walking out of his office.

When that door closed, I left everything to do with him and the bond right behind it. For now. It might work out in my favor that this place needs a top to bottom restructuring. There is no point in trying to salvage the porquería (crap) policy and procedure manual that Alpha Daniel had a two-year-old draw up. At the same time, I’ll find ways of giving Alpha Paul incentives to give me what I want. My freedom.

HERC POV

Something is off with boss lady. “She looks fine to me.” Aries sounded like he was drooling as he spoke. He wasn’t wrong. The benefit of working out with an attractive shewolf who goes to the gym to work out and not model is that you have a masterpiece to glance at when you’re running out of steam. A masterpiece that doesn’t need you doting on them.

“Make sure you don’t cross the line between admiring and ogling.” Aries warned and I averted my gaze. “How are you drooling one second and then scolding me for providing the feast?” He always had his foot just inside the door, but he never stepped inside. His feelings for her were… hard to decipher. Mine were clear, I’m attracted to her. A lot.

More than that, I enjoy her company and the flirtatious banter we have from time to time. Though, she has made things very clear from the beginning. No mixing business with pleasure. Not even as f**k buddies, I tried. “She doesn’t want any of her men looking at her like nothing more than what she is. Their superior.” Aries had a pretty good theory.

As much as it annoys me that I can’t have her, I respect her reasoning. I would never think any less of her if she allowed me to feast between her thighs or if she rode me until we were both raw. There was nothing she could do in bed that would change how I saw her out of it. She had earned my respect and friendship.

That’s why it was easy for both my wolf and I to accept a smaller wolf as a superior. A shewolf no less. Normally, it’s instinctual for a wolf to size up a higher-ranking wolf. Maybe even challenge them if they think they are better for the position. Or if they don’t have a desire to lead, like me, they might still be defiant and refuse to follow orders. I’ve never had the desire to do either.

Great, now I lost track of my reps. “That's enough, I don't want you whining later about being sore.” The normal teasing tone wasn’t there, and her eyebrows were furrowed. Yup, something’s up. “What’s wrong boss?” I set the weights down and sat up. Her body went ridged, mid-squat.

When her eyes met mine, I could tell she was going boss lady mode. In one move she was upright, shoulders squared. “Nothing is wrong…” She shook her head, but I shook mine back and stood. “You’re strong. That isn’t up for debate.” I asserted and took a few steps forward, her scent intensified. Peaches and honey.

I can enjoy her proximity and get my point across. No matter what you’ve heard of men, we're capable of doing two things at once. “As your subordinate, I get your need to separate your personal life from your professional life. As your friend.” I took another step, getting dangerously close to a confused-looking boss lady.

I was in the war zone and there was no backing out at this point. “Leia.” I expected her to slap me for not using her title, but instead I was met with a pair of wide light brown eyes that were staring up at me. “Keep going!” Aries urged. I licked my lips and tried to remember my brilliant speech.

“As a friend, I can sense something is very wrong.” At the word friend her eyes softened before she frowned and bristled. “Maybe I made a mistake having a friendship with you.” She took a step back as she questioned part of the reason I looked forward to my job. “No way.” I growled and shook my head.

“You can’t do that. We held each other’s hair while throwing up! I know girl code! While I'm definitely NOT a girl, or woman, I’m holding you to that shit.” What the f**k did I just say? “You called us her girlfriend.” Aries sneered at me. I was too focused on her shocked expression to remind him that I clearly stated I was NOT a girl.

The awkward silence was starting to make me nervous. “Should I clarify that I’m not a girl again?” I asked Aries, not sure of what to say next. Luckily, I didn’t need to say anything because she broke out into a smile and barked out a laugh. “Laughing means you get to keep your balls.” My wolf chuckled in relief.

I began to smile, but then I noticed the tears pooling in her eyes. My eyes went wide but when I realized she was being vulnerable in front of me… something she never did, I schooled my face right before she looked up at me. “Herc.” Her voice nearly cracked, it sounded strange. I felt a sharp pain in my chest at the sound.

Then I realized why her voice was strained. She was choking back her sobs. When her bottom lip trembled, my legs moved forward before I could stop them. “I can’t… I… Humph..” She let out a muffled gasp when her face landed between my chest and my arms wrapped around her. It felt right… felt good, actually.

Her body went stiff as board, and I thought for sure she was going to knee me in the nuts for touching her. It would be worth it though; she was softer than she appeared. “Don’t kill me boss lady. You needed this.” Truthfully, it was the only thing I could give. Especially since I didn’t know what was wrong.

If I knew who pissed her off, they’d already be dead. “I hate you for turning me into a blubbering emotional mess.” She whined angrily, yet adorably, and slapped my chest. I chuckled but didn’t let her go. “I’m the boss lady whisperer. You can tell me anything.” I never expected her to though. The more time she spent in my arms, the more I realized I liked having her there.

In the time I’ve known Leia, she’s always kept her personal life private. As close as we’ve become, this is our first official sober hug. We’ve bonded enough that we’ve both told each other to take a shower or brush our teeth because we stink. That didn’t mean she would tell me… “I found my mate, and he’s that horrible Alpha!” She cried angrily out of nowhere.

What? “She met her mate…” Aries whispered. “Did she say her mate was the horrible Alpha?” I growled in my head. But I've seen them in the same room, and they've never acknowledged one another as mates. Right now, it didn’t seem like the time to bring that up to her since she was clutching my shirt and whipping her nose on it. “Gross, Leia.” I complained halfheartedly while still processing what she just said.

She giggled evilly and that managed to loosen the knot that had formed in my throat. The thought of Alpha Paul, who I assumed to be the horrible Alpha, being her mate irked me to no end. “I needed to let that out but....” She pushed away from me and looked up with a serious face. “That won’t happen again.” She shook her head, agreeing with herself.

Wiping her tears with the back of her hands, she held her head high. “We’re going to reject one another soon. So, there is no point dwelling on spilled milk.” She shrugged and turned her back to me. As if she hadn’t just broken down, she continued her workout. “She’s hurt.” Aries grumbled.

We didn’t like our boss lady getting hurt, not physically or emotionally. Especially not by someone who was supposed to worship her like a goddess. Especially not some wet behind the ears Alpha who can’t run a small and somehow established pack. “The asshole took a chosen mate and is rejecting her.” Aries pointed out.

That’s right! Natalia, the reason he wasn’t here when we arrived. That had to be the reason they were rejecting one another. Why would he take a chosen instead of accepting his fated? “Stop staring at me.” Leia growled with her back still turned. “Can’t help it. I don't understand... why?” I shouldn’t have said that based on her low growl. “Doesn’t matter. It’s just the way it is.” She said casually and sighed in exasperation.

The rest of our work-out I left that bullshit alone. Not only because I couldn’t figure out why any sane wolf would let a shewolf like Leia slip from their hands, but because she should never have been mated with him to begin with. Then I started to get angry as I recalled the sadness in her eyes and the way her bottom lip trembled. “If she was mine…” I began to tell Aries. “He doesn’t deserve her, we should make her OURS.” Aries suddenly blurted out. Ours?