Second Thought

Chapter 9

                                                                                    Serenity's POV

    I felt Alexanders grip on me loosen and I pushed his arm away and ran over to Liam. My sobs started getting louder as Liam wouldn't even look at me. A few moments later, Alexander came and helped Liam up, placing his arm around his shoulder.

    Amusement fell from every word as Alexander said, "I will take him to get looked at, but you should know that he won't have anything to do with you anymore of his own free will." He opened the door and made sure that I saw that repulsive smile play across his lips before he closed the door.

    I didn't know what to do or say. Why would he not look at me? Is it because of what Alexander did to me in front of him? I have never felt more like dying than I do right now. I felt so drained. I had finally found a reason to want to live. I had found someone that made me feel alive and as a cruel joke, he was taken as quickly as I had him. I walked over to the dresser and threw on a gown. I felt disgusting but I didn't have the strength to do anything else. I climbed into bed and started crying again, I couldn't fight back the tears. My eyes began feeling heavy and I drifted off to sleep.

    I awoke to a knock on the door. I was hoping to see Liam, but I knew the chances were slim. The door creaked open and a young woman stepped inside. She walked over to my bed and sat down on the edge. She had a gentle voice when she spoke.

    "Alexander sent me here to make sure you are up and ready."

    "What time is it?”

    "It is 8pm and he said that you and he are to go out tonight. I'm Cora and I will be personally attending to you tonight. I am sorry for you dear. I live in the room a few doors down and I heard everything from earlier. I know that all seems lost now but if you need anyone, I am here for you."

    "Thank you. It means a lot to me." I could see her kindness and I immediately warmed to her. We talked for another ten minutes before she ushered me into the bathroom to clean up. Once out of the bathroom, she had clothes picked out and rested on the bed for me. I slipped the navy-blue dress on and the heels to match. I returned to the bathroom and put my hair up into a bun and put on light makeup to cover the bruise on my cheek. A few moments later, Cora returned.

    "You look beautiful Serenity. Alexander is downstairs waiting for you."

    "I know I shouldn't ask but I have to know that Liam is okay."

    I heard her let out a sigh, "yes he is okay. He is a little bruised up, but he is resting now. He asked me the same about you. I know that it is not my place, but he cares about your well-being. He wants what is best for you and is concerned for you. With that, he knows his place and wanted to let you know that is sorry, but he won’t be seeing you anymore."

    "He is doing it to protect me. I know he is. I just wish that I could see him again to understand why he is now distancing himself. I can't explain it, but I feel like I know him even though we have spent little time together."

    "He knows that but for both of your sakes, it is best that you both keep your distance. Maybe it’s better this way. He still hopes that you can change for his brother and led him to the light. For what it is worth, I think he is right."

    "I don't want to bring light to Alexander. I can't even look at him after what he did to me. He had no right to touch me like that. He violated me and I can't forget that."

    "I understand and I don't blame you for your thoughts. You have every reason to be upset. I wish I could say something to help but I know no matter what words I say, nothing will. It is time to take you downstairs before he comes up here and that will not end well for either of us."

    I just nodded and followed her out of the room and down the stairs to where Alexander was waiting. Tears pricked up in my eyes, but I refused to let them flow. Alexander didn't even look at me. He grabbed my hand and led me outside to the car. I opened the door myself, not surprised that he didn't open it for me. We didn't speak a word for the whole ride. I didn't even want to know where we were going. Finally, we stopped in front of a restaurant and both got out of the car. A man in a red suit took the car keys to park the car for him. We walked through the door of the dimly lit restaurant and a young woman greeted us, sensing the tension. Alexander didn't say anything as she led us to a room with only one table inside. She gestured for us to take our seats and a moment later a waiter appeared to take our orders.   

    The waiter appeared and asked, "What would you like to drink this evening?"

    Alexander spoke for the both of us, "We will both have a glass of your best wine and two of your best dishes."

    "Yes sir." The waiter takes the order and leaves us in silence. I didn't care what he ordered. I felt so sick that I knew I couldn't possibly eat it. As if reading my mind Alexander spoke.

    "I expect you to eat everything on your plate without hesitation. If you do not, you will be punished.”

    "Okay Alexander," is all I could muster. I didn't want to make him angrier than he already was. How was I going to eat? How was I supposed to act like everything was okay? I didn't want to be here, let alone be here with him. How would I survive this night?

    "I want to apologize for earlier. I am not sorry for beating the f**k out of my brother for touching you. I am sorry about invading your body without your permission. I didn't know you were a virgin. Sometimes I get angry and all I see is red. My body takes over and I don't think."

    He caught me off guard. Alexander is not one to apologize for his behavior. Something kept telling me that it wasn't sincere, that he was just saying it to pacify me. I just shook my head because if I said what I was thinking, it would be bad for me. What I really wanted to tell him, was that I saw right through him and that he was completely full of s**t. I saw Alexander out the corner of my eye, getting angry. He was getting pissed that I wasn't saying anything to his so-called apology. Why should I say anything? I owe this man nothing! I saw him move and my immediate response was to flinch because I thought he was going to hit me. Thankfully, the waiter appeared by the table with our food. I ate in complete silence knowing that it was really getting on his nerves. I never realized how hungry I was though. I was so focused on purposely pissing him off in the littlest way I could get away with, that I didn't realize I ate every bite of my food. Once we finished eating, we headed back to his home. I stared out the window the whole time, looking at all the trees passing by. We came to the front of the home and before Alexander could get out and open my door, I opened it up myself and headed straight for my room. I slammed the door once I got in and let out the breath that I didn't know I had been holding. I couldn't stand being in his presence. He was so cocky and thought he was just supposed to get his way from everyone. Well I know one thing; he wasn't going to get his way with me. I started to feel queasy and ran to the bathroom just in time to release the contents that were sitting on my stomach. I did have to admit, I felt much better. I reached for my toothbrush and toothpaste and began brushing my teeth. A moment later, I heard the door creak open then footsteps heading my way. My heart immediately sank into my chest. I knew it was Alexander. I couldn't explain the way I felt when I was near him. It wasn't a good feeling, but it felt like a big black hole was sucking all my breath from my body. Alexander stepped inside the doorway of the bathroom and grabbed my hands. He shoved me against the bathroom wall.

    "You don't get to leave without me dismissing you. You belong to me. You’re driving me crazy. I know that you want me. I can see the way I make you feel physically when I am around you. Your legs tremble and not because your scared, it’s because you want me."

    I sighed, "I got sick. That is why I rushed to my room. You also don't get to say stuff like that to me. You don't know what I want, and you should know that it is not you that I want."

    He let go of my hand for a moment, just to slam it against the wall. "You are mine. I need you to say it. Just say it."

    I went silent, unable to say the words. He knew I wouldn't be able to say it. He knew how I felt about him, but he still tries to find ways to torment me. I wasn't his and I didn't belong to anyone. I will never obey him, and I will most certainly never be his.

    Alexander once again slammed his fists against the wall. This time hitting the tile right my head. He hit the tile so hard that my head rattled from side to side. "Dammit, say it!" I didn't say it though, I just stayed silent. He spoke again, "It doesn't matter whether you feel it or not. You are mine and there is nothing you can do about it. You defy me at every corner, and you drive me crazy. You will learn your place, or I will put you in your place myself."

    That is when I felt his hand leave one of my arms and he placed it on my face. He started moving his rough hands down my neck, over my chest and down toward my waist. I looked at him pleading for him to stop and I immediately regretting even looking at him. He took it as an invitation to continue. I couldn't find the words to tell him to stop. My mind kept shifting back to him touching me before and the way he assaulted my body. He smiled and I immediately looked away. I tried to squirm out of his grip, but he was too strong. He had his body placed in the perfect position and it was almost impossible to move. I heard his breathing go from soft and gentle like to angry in a second. He grabbed my dress and ripped it open as I watched it fall to the floor. I started shaking unsure of what to do. What could I do? He was too strong to move. All I could think about was screaming and punching him with just enough force for him to stumble back. That would give me enough space to run and make my getaway. I knew that it was a hopeless thought and if I failed, I feared my fate would be much worse. He unclipped my bra and tore my panties to shreds. I stood there naked in nothing but my high heels.

    "Do you realize how beautiful you are? You have the most beautiful skin", he said while running his fingers over my breast. "I know you want this. You can deny it, but you want me. You know how I know? Look at the way your n*****s react to my touch. I bet your soaking already." He pushed himself against me and I could feel his erection trough his jeans. I felt like I was going to vomit all over again. He was going to take from me the only thing I had to myself. My virginity was the only thing I had control over, and I don't even know if I will have that after tonight. He held my hands above my head with one hand while his other traveled down to his erection. He grabbed himself and started rubbing himself in front of me. A second later, he unbuttoned his jeans and slipped them off along with the boxers he was wearing. His erection sprung free and tears started rolling down my cheeks. I started to feel queasy again and my breathing became harder. I was in hell and I couldn't help but to think what I did to deserve this. Alexanders hand moved along my body and down over my s*x. "See, you are wet. You do want this." He slipped one finger inside of me and I couldn't take it any longer. "Stop!", I said. He didn't stop, he started going at a faster pace. In and out, in and out.

    "Brother are you in here?", I hear Liam as he approaches the bathroom door. He took one look and his face became full of anger but to my surprise he said, "oh, I am sorry. I didn't know." He turned around to make his leave.

    Alexander let out a sigh, "What is it Liam? This better be damn important."

    I heard Liam slowly approaching the doorway again and when he did, his head held low. "Yes, we have some important matters that require your attention immediately."

    "Fine." Alexander grabbed my face and licked his lips. He pressed his lips to mine and violently started thrashing his tongue inside my mouth. I made no attempt to kiss him back. I can't even look at this man right now. He has some nerve. I can't take this anymore. He doesn't have the right to touch me whenever he sees fit. "Kiss me back, now. You either kiss me back right now or you grab me and suck me off in front of brother." I knew there was no way my hand nor my mouth was going anywhere near his erection. I knew that I wouldn’t be able to do that to Liam either. I know that it would hurt him to see me kiss Alexander back, but it would kill him to see me do anything s****l with his brother. I leaned forward and placed me lips on Alexanders and started to move my tongue in rhythm with his. He slammed my body against the tile wall once more and pushed himself against me. This time it was different, this time it was skin to skin and it felt so wrong. I heard him moaning into my mouth as he started moving his hips to the rhythm of our tongues. After a few moments, his lips finally left mine. My eyes immediately shot to Liam and I could see the pain in his face. He quickly looked away as if he couldn't stand to stare at me after that. Alexander slipped his boxers then his jeans back on. As he looked in Liam's direction, a smile creeped across his lips. "Alright, let's go to my office", Alexander said breathlessly while leading Liam out of my room.