half/closer

half / 18

Did you ever have a feeling of never-ending joy in your heart? That no matter what terrible things come in your way, the enormous bliss is still in you, blooming and soaring in each part of your soul?

Well, I was definitely filled with this unexplainable feeling.

My weekend started at dawn. After that night out at the lake, driving back to the treehouse and then those dramatic confessions, Khloe and I had fallen into sleep with affectionate smiles on our lips, only to be bombarded with a call at five in the morning.

It was my father who was asking me where I was and demanding me to go back home before he calls for a search party. Khloe was worried but I felt odd.

Contentment with no regret— that's how I felt as Khloe drove me back home.

Because damn, it was all worth it. I've got to hear her say she liked me too. My feelings were reciprocated finally and all I wanted to do once I entered our house, was to embrace my parents and tell them how happy I was.

However, it wasn't my scene. Dad was fuming which was understandable. Who would not be raging when you found out that your grounded daughter was able to sneak out from a military-like mansion of her father?

Sad life because it also placed me in a tight spot with my Mom. She was supposed to convince my father to let me go to an art school but given the situation, I unintentionally provoked them again by breaking their rules. Even though Mom had the power to sway him in a blink of an eye, I bet she wouldn't do it for me this time.

And to make it worse, I was refusing to tell them who I was with. And that resulted in house arrest for the entire winter break. Though Christmas was not my thing, still, I wouldn't be able to spend it with Khloe.

Everything was unclear to the point I had no idea what to make of. My parents wanted me to go to medical school even though it was not my passion. Arisa, my best friend, was already planning to travel the whole world with Quinn after we graduate. Bailey? She was unclear herself because we still didn't have any news about Tiana and I knew it was killing her every day. Alec was also planning to study far away.

Khloe was the only certain thing I have for the moment. She was the one who was constantly making me happy and giddy about everything. She was the only person who could stir the butterflies in my stomach and poke the sleeping siren in my heart.

So even though the world was on my shoulder, I still had the capability to crack a smile on my face, especially whenever my mind was filled with thoughts of her. I remembered the admiration on her face when I exposed myself wholly to her and I memorized the moment her face contorted in surprise when I told her about my feelings. They were overwhelmed to the point I wanted to scream lungs out in confidence.

I was glad I could still talk to her. She was a real genius for giving me a god-tool device. My parents wouldn't even suspect anything because I promised myself to be careful.

The entire weekend was a little bit uninteresting. I steeped low due to my parents' behavior towards me. Denying to tell them who I was with, they settled to letting me roam around the house without giving me any kind of attention. It was heart-breaking to realize that we were not like this before. The mansion was always crammed with love and laughter when Cassie was still with us.

However, things changed. It sounded like I was a terrible daughter but they were also not giving me a chance to speak for myself. They left me no choice but to ponder about what they decide for me or how should I act on it.

It was the last week of school before the winter break and once I woke up, I rushed to the school early without giving much thought about breakfast. I was eager to see my bad-ass girl because I missed her so much. We might be talking frequently but seeing her pretty-intimidating face and embracing her warmth were a different story. So I made sure to her the night before that I would come early to school and stay at my studio before the bell rings.

Once our driver dropped me at the school front, I entered the building but was halted when someone whistled behind me causing me to turn in confusion. But instantly, a broad smile spread to my face, seeing a brunette holding a drink carrier and a box of Famous Belgian Waffles in both hands.

"Are you up for waffles and a cup of mochaccino to start your Monday, beautiful?" Khloe asked with a heart-warming smile, her tone was prominent of playfulness.

Although blushes were transparent on my cheeks, I immediately attacked her as I tightly hugged her body in my arms.

"Aww, hey, careful. Hot drink kills." Khloe was taken aback, not knowing what to do. I felt like she wanted to hug me back but her hands were full, cautious of not spilling the hot fluid on us. "Well, someone misses me."

I giggled before I rained her kisses on her left cheek. "I missed you, Klo."

She hummed happily. "You can hug me like this because we're alone in this hallway."

I pouted as I rested my chin on her shoulder. "Silly, I would still hug you even if the entire population of the world is watching. Don't you miss me?"

A light chuckle escaped her mouth. "I missed you, too but it will be great if we continue this in your studio," she said, wiggling her brows at me.

I chuckled as a response. "Sure thing."

"Okay, ummm, would you mind carrying this box?"

"I guess you have an addiction to waffle," I noted as she handed me the paper box of pastries. Then she strangely walked over to the other side and grasped my free hand and intertwining our fingers in the process.

"Not how I'm addicted to you," Khloe muttered, winking at me, and then she burst out laughing at her own antics. I couldn't help but laugh along with her. The melodious sound would always bring a spark to my eyes.

"That was lame, right?"

I nodded with a toothy grin as we headed towards the administration building, our hands were swinging between us.

Khloe was never into sweet-talking, not that she wasn't affectionate or anything. In fact, during those times when we were still enemies-with-benefits, she was the one who would initiate touching me or surprising me by cuddling me from my back, which always resulted in me initiating a kiss, then we would always end up making out afterward.

It was all too surreal for me. Of course, after years of relentlessly hating her for giving us a hard time and for pulling pranks on us every week, I couldn't have guessed that I would get feelings with this gorgeous trickster.

"Do you want blueberry or cinnamon?" Khloe asked once we seated on my couch at the art studio.

"Cinnamon, please," I answered, enveloping her waist from the side, my chin resting on her shoulder while I watched her fixed our breakfast.

Khloe stopped for a moment before she swirled her body slightly towards me. She narrowed her eyes, her palm was caressing my inner thigh unconsciously. "I thought you'll ask for a kiss first before anything else."

I bit my lip, restraining myself from smiling widely. "You won't get any. It's your fault for not keeping a promise."

She groaned. "In my defense, your Dad called you, demanding you to go back home. We don't have time for promises, shoes."

I rolled my eyes at her new endearment term. "But still, a promise is a promise! And you, Khloe Summer, promised to let your girl kiss your abs."

She let out a light laugh. "Okay, I'll tell Maggie she may proceed to kiss my abs later because she's my— Owww! Did you just hit me?!"

I bounced at my seat like a frustrated kid. "I'm your girl! Don't ever say that!"

Holding her stomach in dramatic pain, Khloe shook her head in disbelief. "Shoes, no need to get violent. You're my girl, alright? I was just kidding, for Pete's sake."

"Now back to kissing abs," I prompted the topic again. "You can lift your shirt now."

The brunette looked at me, her mouth agape. "Are we seriously going to do this right now? Your breakfast is getting cold."

I couldn't help but let out a joyous giggle. "That's why I want to warm it up," I said in a sultry tone while stroking her stomach fondly.

Khloe froze for a brief second and then she freed a burst of loud laughter from her mouth. "Oh god, Hilary! That's a good one."

Though I was so proud of myself for making her laugh, that I wanted to just combust at my spot for doing a good job, I tried my best to look serious nonetheless. "I'm dead serious, Klo. No matter how much you protest, I will get what I want. So just shut up!" I said sternly, pushing her down on the couch and straddled her shamelessly.

Khloe whined, clasping my hips with her hands to balance me. "Fine! Just be gentle to me."

Licking my upper lip, I grabbed the hem of her shirt and pushed it up to reveal my newly found obsession. I could tell my eyes were shining in excitement as I stared down at her flat stomach.

Khloe's abdominal muscles were defined enough for a woman. They were slightly visible, but not excessive like fitness models usually have. As for me, they were mouth-watering and looked tasty, officially making me a total pervert. But I really didn't mind being called a pervert. This was my Khloe and we agreed that night that she was mine and I was hers so I had every right to feel this way.

"Are you just gonna stare or what?" Khloe's voice was impatient but I could feel she was bothered at our position.

Linking my eyes with hers, I slowly flattened my palm on her muscles causing her to trash with lurid giggles. "Tickles!!"

"Wait, Klo... Stay still, will yah?!" I complained, but a smile crept on my lips as I caressed her stomach in enjoyment. Her skin was hot against mine and knowing I should have to do it fast because time was ticking, I bent down, closed my eyes, and placed open-mouthed kisses on my new addiction.

Khloe tensed up under my lips while I tried to keep her still by pushing her further against the leather couch. Moaning at her sweet taste, I slipped my tongue between my lips, licking her skin obsessively, and Khloe retorted with a loud laugh.

"Hi-Hilary!! Stop! It seriously tickles!! I can't— I can't handle it anymore!!"

Jutting my bottom lip as I rose up, I gave her a disapproving look. "Gosh, Klo... You're supposed to moan my name right this moment!"

Khloe's chest was heaving as she sat up to counter my whining. "You trying to kill me?! Holy sh!t! I'm— I'm out of breath. Now, where's my kiss?"

"Breakfast is served," I teased, lifting myself off her but Khloe immediately protested. She locked her arms around my waist possessively, pulling me closer.

"So much for missing me. You can't even give me a proper kiss," she grumbled before leaning in, crashing my lips to hers and I instantly melted.

Kissing her was really something. I would never get used to the way she would mold our lips together. It was an erratic dance producing a sensory overload to my body yet stopping the world outside my consciousness. An art that was so seamless, encouraging me to seize further to the deepest core of her greatness. A touch of an erotic heat, the link to the lost fragments inside me. Kissing Khloe was the highlight of my story.

And the story ended once she pulled away, our breath mingled as one.

"Fair enough," she mumbled, nuzzling her nose against mine.

With one last peck, I giggled and got off her. We both sat properly with smiles on our faces, then we finally dwelled on our already cold breakfast.

•••••

"If you keep glaring at a certain someone, you'll end up murdering them in their sleep," I heard Quinn's voice, apparently aware of my stupor at the moment.

"But if you keep being gorgeous, I might not get enough of you forever," Arisa responded smoothly to her girlfriend with a laugh, totally oblivious to what Quinn was trying to point out.

"Stop, please. There's no such thing as forever and who's glaring at who anyway?" Bailey muttered beside me who obviously didn't give any s**t.

"No one," Quinn answered nonchalantly.

I turned my attention back to my friends, my jaw clenching in anger. It was bad enough that Khloe and I had only two classes together and we couldn't even eat together in the cafeteria. I couldn't even hang out with her after school. I couldn't even see her at weekends anymore because of my parent's monitoring rules. We only had limited time together every day. So how could he just appear in the picture and kiss her cheek just like that? And why Khloe didn't stop him? Was she aware that she was mine already? Or our agreement was only just a bluff? Weren't we official yet?

I thought we— I thought we've already established our relationship.

Damn it! I wanted to slay something, or someone rather.

Juddering the thoughts off my mind, I stood up abruptly and my friends jumped at my sudden move. Quinn was looking at me with amusement on her alluring face while the rest of my friends were in puzzlement.

"Quinn, you better talk to that Xander, or else I would really end up killing him," I hissed, pointing in his direction.

"I will not do such a thing. Talk to him yourself," the blonde sweetheart harshly turned me down before eating a mouthful of steamed vegetables. She was really heartless sometimes.

"Okay, gorgeous. What is she blubbering?" Arisa inquired her girl as she looked at me weirdly.

Bailey purred, her eyes averted to the subject of my anger before she scoffed. "I can't believe this."

"W-What?" Arisa questioned, her confusion getting stronger. "Did the s**t do something terrible to you?"

"Love, don't make an assumption. I believe the boy is innocent. Your best friend is just exaggerating," Quinn said in defense causing my blood to pump in disbelief.

"He's innocent? That s**t kissed her. He kissed what's mine!" I hissed again, my fists were turning white in anger.

"You didn't just say that," Bailey sneered.

"What the hell is going on?!" Arisa's eyes widened while her mouth ajar.

"Don't talk about her as if she's a property. You're being too possessive and I don't like it," Quinn retorted with a scowl.

With a raging huff, I shook my head while my heart was convulsing in irritation. Quinn was wrong. I wasn't being possessive, right?

Not taking it anymore, I grabbed my purse and rudely left my friends. Arisa was calling me but I refused to be persuaded. I should've explained it to her but I was not in the mood to argue anymore. I was certain she would freak out once she learned that there was something going on with Khloe. Obviously, she had a hint of what's going on but she was in denial.

The only thought in my mind was Quinn's words. That little blondie-imp always knew how to piss me off. If she really didn't like me for her sister, she was allowed to tell it on my face. But instead, she would find a way to tick me in annoyance.

Or maybe she was right? Maybe I was being too possessive over Khloe. However, that's how I felt when that jerk's mouth landed on my girl's cheek. Knowing that Xander had feelings for Klo and there was a possibility that she liked him back, I was terrified that she might realize that her feelings were stronger for him.

Needing to get away from all the noises, I headed to the comfort room and tossed my purse on the counter with a sigh. I looked at myself in the mirror with a storm in my mind. When I realized that Quinn was indeed right, I pinched the bridge of my nose in mortification and groaned out loud. I was pleased that I was alone in the room because they might think I was crazy.

I grabbed my purse again and decided to touch myself up instead. It wasn't like I looked like a mess but I had to look beautiful if I was going to a war of getting a girl. Gosh, I couldn't believe I was doing this but Khloe was worth everything.

Fishing out my lipstick, I heard the door opened but ignored whoever it was even the sound of the door closing.

"What's wrong, shoes?" a familiar voice caught me off guard, causing me to drop my lipstick on the tiled floor.

Tilting my head, I saw Khloe standing before me, her back was leaning against the back of the door while she crossed her arms under her chest. I averted my eyes off her in guilt. "What are you doing here?"

I heard her footsteps coming closer to me. "An obnoxious someone messaged me that she kept a jelly in this bathroom and wants me to check on it."

A bitter laugh escaped my lips. "Oh, please. There's nothing here."

Khloe bent down and grabbed my lipstick on the floor. She stood up straight then lifted the cosmetic for me with a smug look on her face.

I rolled my eyes and was about to take it but Khloe was faster when she hid it behind my back and enclosed me in an embrace. "I take it you're jealous."

My face scowled as I pushed her shoulder but she was stronger than me. "I'm not jealous."

"Yes, you don't have to be jealous," Khloe said sternly, her eyes stared deeply into mine. I gulped at the intensity she was bringing into my system and I instantly surrendered myself to her as I let her squeezed me closer to her body. "But you're jealous and I think it's adorable."

My gaze turned to a glare. "Okay, I am and it's nothing to be happy about. It's not fücking adorable, Klo. It's not really a good feeling so stop playing games with me."

Khloe sighed before pressing her forehead to mine, her eyes were still connected to me in an unfathomable way. "I'm not playing games with you. I'm dead serious about liking you, Hilary. I've already talked to Xander that I have feelings for someone already so he doesn't have any chance with me anymore. He didn't take it well so the least I could do is to let him cope with it the way he wants it."

I pouted. "Then why did he have to kiss you?"

Khloe let out a soft laugh, and then she closed her eyes while she stroked my lower back fondly. "It's a friendly gesture, shoes."

I groaned, gripping the fabric of her shirt. "You might think it is but he knows he kissed you with feelings."

Khloe pulled an inch away and looked at me with a kinked eyebrow. "If that makes you uncomfortable, then I will not let him do that next time."

"No, it's alright. It just makes me angry so I'm the one to blame. Quinn is right. I'm being so possessive of you."

Khloe leaned closer to my ear. "It's cute though. You're pretty cute."

Her words warmed my cheeks. "Stop it, Klo. You're making a mess out of me."

Khloe laughed at my response. "Okay, I'm really serious. I'm not going to let him do it next time because I don't want you to feel bad about yourself because of it. And hey, I'm yours so you have all the right to feel jealous. That's alright because I also feel that way whenever I see you hang out with your friends in public. I also want to be able to casually walk over to your group and talk to you like it's a normal thing to do. But you know Arisa, she's gonna ask questions and I don't want you to explain yourself in a tight spot so I'll just wait for you to tell her about us. And those hungry eyes aiming at you? Damn! I want to pierce their eyes and feed them to the dogs for even glancing at you like you're food. So don't feel bad about it, okay?"

I nodded, biting my lips. "Okay."

The brunette smiled affectionately. "Good."

"So....ummmm, Klo?"

"Yes, my jelly," she teased causing us to laugh together.

"Now that I'm yours and you're mine already, wh-what are we exactly?" I asked nervously, my fingers fumbled her shirt in coyness.

Khloe narrowed her eyes at my question. "Do you really want me to ask you the most epic question inside our school bathroom?"

"I don't mind," I whispered as I bit my lips.

"But that would be inappropriate," Khloe claimed and she stepped back, her hands dropping to mine and held them softly. "But I've got an idea. Will you come to the library with me? I have something to show you."

A bright smile formed on my face and I eagerly nodded.

I let Khloe dragged me out of the bathroom and we ignored the stares directing at us as we walked through the hallway holding each other's hand.

"Better be quick. We only have fifteen minutes before classes start again," Khloe informed and we started to speed walk to the library already.

Once we get there, Khloe greeted the school librarian before tugging me at the farthest part of the library. She seemed to know where exactly we should go. So after passing a few shelters of book, we turned to the poetry section.

"Mmmm, are you gonna read a poem to me first before you ask me the most epic question?" I asked, not stopping myself from embracing her closer to my body.

"Good guess," she murmured, kissing the crown of my head tenderly.

Then she reached for a little book as if she had already memorized its place. I stared down at the book in her hand, confused about its appearance. It was hardbound but there was no title or anything— it was just a book covered with vintage material.

Khloe handed out the book to me so I let her go and held it in my hand. I scanned it by flipping the pages and I noticed that the contents were all handwritten. There was also no title inside, table of contents, index nor publisher information. And I realized this was not really a book— it was purely a handwritten notebook.

"Can you read the latest handwritten poem?" Khloe spoke and I gazed up at her with my eyebrow raised.

Looking down at the book, I turned the pages and stopped at the latest note. The rest of the pages were still blank but with only a few notes then it would be complete already. I glanced at Khloe first and she motioned me to go on so I gripped the edges of the book and read every word on the paper:

"

Ocean soul sparkles and lingers

Silent cries whispering to the air

Golden mare gliding between my fingers

Her vast agony is too much for me to bear

How could I cease her pain away?

Why is it my heart aching hearing her wail?

Eager to shelter her full to make her day

The sole reason why I shadow her trail

Touching her plump lips awakens my spirit

Her beautiful voice brings essence to my ear

Caressing her smooth skin under the moonlit

Change the darkness of my night to disappear

Needs of her presence are greater than seas

The carnal of my longing far superior than eternity

Abysmal feelings began, only craving to be ceased

How could I conceal my feelings larger as infinity?

"

Once I was done reading the poem, I looked at Khloe, my eyes were already glistening with tears. The poem contained profound feelings in it. Each line pricked my heart as if the author was dying inside for seeing a person she cares about in sorrow and in grief, wanting them to be protected from everything. But then she began to feel something for that person and all she wanted was to hide it from them for some reason.

With those thoughts inside my mind, Khloe cupped my face and she gave me a heart-warming smile. "Can you keep a secret?"

Clamping my lips, I nodded and smiled back at her in a tender manner.

"After I woke up from a coma, I realized that life is too short," Khloe stated, tucking the lost strands of my golden hair behind my ear. "So I decided that I have to leave a mark in this life. And I think the only thing I can leave in this world are memories. But then people encounter death in time along with memories and I thought that maybe if I place my feelings and views in a book and make sure to pass them to my descendants, my mark will remain forever. So I bought a blank book and since then I would write on each page whenever I feel like it. I kept this in the library because I want it to be found by someone and read each of my feelings and thoughts. And the poem you read— I wrote it when I realized that I have feelings for you. Sorry, it sounds lame, isn't it?"

I giggled, shook my head and reached for her hands, and interlaced them together with mine. "No, goddammit, Klo! It's sweet, really! You're so sweet."

"Really? It doesn't seem like I'm a creep or something?" she asked, tightening her hold on me.

"No, I really get what you're trying to say," I laughed out. "And the poem is beautiful but when did you realize your feelings for me?"

"Ummm, when I was holding you inside my car," she answered, her eyes were recalling a memory. "You were crying because of Tiana. That time I swore to myself that I wouldn't let you cry that much anymore. I want you to be always happy and far from terrible things."

"Gosh, Klo. I don't know if I can handle all of this anymore. You have this feeling for me for so long while I was wondering if my feelings were really one-sided," I said, needing to scream lungs out for being the happiest girl in the world.

"I guess," she muttered, then chuckling to herself. "So are you ready to hear the most epic question?"

I immediately beamed as I nodded excitedly.

Bringing my knuckles under her chin, she stared at my eyes genuinely. "Hilary, will you be my girlfriend?"

"Well, after that confession and poem, how could I say no? So of course, Klo," I leaned closer to her and whispered, "Yes, I will be your girlfriend."

And in that library, Khloe and I made a memory, waiting to be written on a page.

•••••