Irreplaceable you

A fresh start

It may seem like a lie, it may seem like I broke your heart, even when you think about it a few years, but know that I always loved you, know that it was always you and always be you, I'm sorry it had to end this way, in sorry it was such a short goodbye without an explanation, you may hate me now, but later, I hope in the future, it will be beautiful memories you can't forget, I love you Derek king, don't forget that.

. Love, Jamie...

Derek's POV

Rain pelted down the glass windows of my new studio apartment, I had just moved into my new apartment, with a relief it was just a stone throw away from college, starting my second year will be hectic but better relief being in my own space than the hostels,

My day was going well enough until I saw that letter again, memories from one of the painful times of my life flashed through me again, my first love leaving me without a trace, Jamie Alistair my first in all, first crush, kiss, first time, my first love and heartbreak, I couldn't help sigh at the letter as I dropped it back in my small box of lingering memories, filled with polaroids, love notes, and doodles made by us, I had tried to let it go, throw it out lost times, but I just couldn't bring myself to,

So thanks mom, for bringing back bad memories, I muttered, I knew it wasn't her fault, but she stopped a little too much in my old room back in Ohio and brought almost the entirety of my bedroom here, minus the cringe posters I had never had the heart of time to remove, but what she delivered made it feel homier as I settled down, in the living room space concerned to the kitchen, it was an open floor plan, the space clean and fresh adult was a new building,

While arranging my bookshelf filled with art supplies and books, since I was an art major in the university of new york

My doorbell rung with me instantly standing up to answer it,

I immediately chuckled to see who was on the intercom, my two crazy friends Luca, and cole who showed their crazy self on the intercoms, with drinks and housewarming gifts, immediately buzzed them up to my floor not wasting time, as crazy as they were, we're my best pals and I would never trade them for anything, they had been with me through thick and thin, since middles school and through high school even the while ordeal and heartbreak with Jamie, every time I was depressed or cried myself to sleep, I would wake up to see them sneak into my room from the window at night with drinks and relieving stories

They were what saved me from the pending abyss, called my thoughts

As I always wondered if it was my fault, if I was too clingy or too immature since I was a lot smaller and skinnier in high school and Jamie being my senior at that time, people called us an odd pair, but I didn't care,

He was outgoing and an extrovert, loud and popular while u was the opposite, but for a reason, we just worked,

And cole and Luca being in the same small group as we made everything perfect, was perfect.

“f**k it's freezing cold outside, the weather is not nice!” Cole complained, removing his jacket that was pelted from the light showers, he was a genius who studies in micro chem, while Luca a little stupider than me, studied photography

“Hey, dweeb” Luca called as he threw a bag of tissues on me, I knew it, I had forgotten something

“Thanks for this” I called laying it with the rest of my stuff still sprawled on my full sized bed, the bedroom dedicated by wood, that was precisely done

“Congrats man, you got your own place, now I won't see your stupid face every single time at our place” cole joked,

“f**k you” I laughed throwing him one of the pillows on my couch, “I hope you guys came to arrange ad not just play games you fuckers,” I fired back, making them jump up as they helped me clean up the place, to a more presentable setting,

Evening time passed as we all sat on the floor with drinks and junk food and PlayStation in our hands., as we played the night away forgetting about the weather,

Till my mind clicked back to my pending project, I know I still had weeks left, but I haven't even started a thing mind still clouded from artists block and canvas empty, and yet this was the thing to be presented at an art gallery, with each student having to make three original pieces

I know I had never gotten complains from my professors since they admired my work, but it's more pressure since I had been assigned with one more extra task to make the fourth piece, and even though I had done the other three, the main piece remains blank

“Hey!” Luca called stoning me with a piece of chips,

“Hurting me with my food? nice,” I uttered making him snicker,

“I've been calling you for a while now, mom wants to know if you're coming over this weekend?” Luca asked

We were close we all called each other parent 'mom' and 'dad'

It had been like a ritual to go to thanksgiving at each other places, I could still remember that jamies home was opposite his, because I would remember lying to my parents I was at Luca and then, run to my lover's house to be with him, Luca being the best bud always cane through and covered my ass.

But after the breakup, if I can call it that, I made myself scarce in his neighborhood, not wanting to be recalled By memories of that house,

“I don't know man, I'm busy with my project “

You're busy all the time, com one, the due date doesn't come until months and you're done with most of your pieces for the convention, just one left right?”

Luca bargained, earning a nod from Cole who agreed instantly

“Dude, you need a break for once, just one week,”

“Alright but I have to tell jasmine”

“Ugh” they both grunted together

“You guys not this again,” they both disliked my girlfriend for some reason unknown to me, and yes, I'm bisexual

“Dude, it's guys week out no girl”

“Yeah, but I still have to tell her why-“

My phone buzzed interrupting me, I looked to see the call icon as 'jazz' that was what I called her, picking up immediately, we had been saying for seven months and was thinking of moving in with her, but not without a big no from my friends who, vehemently try to talk me out of it every day, I hadn't told her yet though

“Hey babe,” I answered

“Hey I'm at your door, so buzz me in” she uttered

“Sure, right away”

“Thanks, babe, love you”

“Love you too,” I said ending it, I looked up to see them standing up, already

“She's here already isn't she?” Luca managed to say, with his mouth full of chips and dusting the remaining on my floor

“She's not poisonous guys,”

“Hmm, we know but we have a game to catch, Coles boyfriend is on the football team remember ?” Luca stated

“Yeah, that's true”

“So well see you tomorrow and guys week at my place?”

“For sure,” I assured walking them to the front door, we felt the door known to move to see jasmine, her blonde hair packed in a high ponytail, as she was wearing a crop top and shorts with Chelsea boots, one had with her bag and the other trying to balance a bag of groceries,

“Hey guys” she called unenthusiastically, as she enters the house

“Hey jasmine

“Hey,” the two of them said with not much thought making my eye roll, I was sure she didn't catch their off point greeting as she was struts rush to the kitchen to drop the brown bag, she never really minded or cared to know my friends but she didn't seem to mind, so did I.

“Bye Derek” they called as they wore their shoes, I heard the door click and they were gone

“Finally,” I heard her utter as she made her way to me kissing me firmly on the lips,

“Hi baby, I missed you all day,” jasmine said sighing into the hug

“Hmm, what have you been up to? I asked” following her back into the kitchen

“Well, I did go see your mom on the weekend,”

“again ?” I sighed, jazz was an amazing girl, but she had a peculiar friendship with my mom and that irked me a bit, it was like she wanted to be everywhere in my life and schedule, it was comforting in a way but still very much wired

“What? She's nice and likes me, I'm the complete package aren't I, I'm perfect!” she jokingly said giving an exaggerated pose,

Yeah, I smiled but for some reason, it wasn't real to me, I felt a little hollow in my chest

"Yeah, the complete package"

right?