Love Reset

Chapter 3

My eyes adjusted to the golden glow that veiled through the small crevices of the window, it's morning and I found myself on a pony themed bedroom. I don't remember myself liking 'my little pony' this much as a child that I had to force my ever so loving parents to customize my room like this.

I stood up, a grin slowly creeping on my face before waltzing around my spacious room, inhaling the smell of being rich and pampered since I missed this kind of living. You play all day, sleep whenever you want, eat the kind of food you want, and it's even prepared in advance on the dining table adorned with a variety of luxurious meals. Of course, all these privileges disappeared the moment I decided to live with Dion and little by little my once extravagant life became a horrendous nightmare. 

When I think about it more carefully, I really met Dion when I was just 7 at the playground and just forgot about it since I was a spoiled brat back then, and maybe I did something to him like psychologically abuse him and call him a weird kid--which I just did yesterday--and that made him build a grudge towards me. When he met me in high school he must have recognized me and then plotted my ultimate demise, that's why my life became miserable. As stupid and irrational as it sounds, that totally explains everything.

"Allina!" The door suddenly bolted open with a loud bang and I know someone in our family who has a hobby of barging in without knocking in hopes that they'll find me doing something bad like hoarding cakes under the bed so that they can snitch on me.

I rolled my eyes and looked at the doorway to see my distant cousin who is just about the same age as I, Vannesa, and by distant cousin I mean she's the daughter of my mother's brother's wife's sister. Don't bother trying to understand it, she's not that important. Well, that's what I thought back then. All I ever thought of her at this time of my life is that she's just lonely and needed a playmate. If only I knew she plotted to steal Dion away from me then I would have kicked her right now. I was too naive not to notice her rotten personality.

She likes our overly huge house and comes to visit almost all the time to meddle with my toys. Of course, whenever I try to tell my parents about how much I don't like other kids, or her, to play with my things they just lectured me with how much important sharing is. They even almost adopted her since I'm an only child and needs a playmate, a sister, but all she ever wanted was to have what is mine. Kind of cliche but there's always this kind of person in any family.

She likes the stuff that I have and eventually, she would take it. I couldn't say anything about it since both my parents like to give everything to people. There's so much thing I have to talk about Vannesa, I couldn't even start with how she tried to ruin my image to Dion so that she would stop him from pursuing me, but Dion believed in me more than that greedy little snake. Dion even protected me when Vannesa was spouting nonsense during class about me, he was the only person who stood by my side when everyone else treated me like an outcast. I have been a persona non grata but Dion still expressed his love for me back then, wholeheartedly if I may add.

"Damn." I slapped myself real hard to save myself from my grotesque trance, this isn't the time to commend Dion for believing me back in high school, that was freaking high school when he was still a stranger to me, of course, he would want me to think that he's a good guy so he can ruin me later in my life.

This daze of mine made me forget that Vannesa was still at the doorway watching me reminisce about the past although I'm already in the past, funny. Vannesa's face was horrified, jaw dropped wide open and her eyes looked like it just saw a ghost.

She must have been surprised to hear me say the word 'damn' and is getting ready to sprint to my mother's office to tell her. The word 'damn' isn't even half of the swear words she kept chanting in high school, how could she act as if I just committed a heinous crime when she's much worse than me.

She already disappeared from my doorway to snitch on me, which is good, that means I spend my morning in peace. She even almost bumped into my nanny, Elri, who was about to enter my room but ignored her since we both know she's just an attention seeker. 

My nanny smiled at me seeing that I'm already up before she could even wake me which saves her a lot of time. "Good morning, Ali." She greeted.

Instinctively, I rushed towards my mini vanity to get my long, unruly hair brushed by her. I guess this is what you call muscle memory, this has been our daily routine until I went to college.

"So what dream did you have while asleep?" Elri asked, her voice was still as soothing as ever that it made me almost cry but didn't. Whenever my parents are too busy handling all their work in helping others, she was the one who always takes care of me despite me being a clumsy child. 

I pondered why she would ask me that question but later on remembering that she used to ask me this every morning since I kept having reoccurring nightmares. She had to make sure that what I dreamt about was good or bad and if it's bad she would sing me to sleep later the night to avoid it. 

I couldn't recall what kind of dream I had since my body was still experiencing extreme jet lag from traveling to the year 2022 to 2007 so I came up with a lie.

"I dreamt that I ended up with a horrible man and my life crumbled to pieces, I dropped out of college because I focused more on him, I lived in a cheap apartment, and works in a run-down publishing company that pays me a penny per hour" I told, although some of it was exaggerated, she seemed oddly fine with my story despite me, a 7-year-old, is talking about adulting.

"That sounds rough." was her reply, gently brushing my hair at a slow pace. "So is that a good dream or a bad dream?" She asked, with a thin smile plastered on her slight wrinkly face. My mouth froze in place right as I was about to say that it was the most horrible dream I ever had but my mind and heart had the audacity to stop me.

It's like something deep inside me is telling me that even though my life ended up being like that, it doesn't mean it's entirely devoid of enjoyment. My mom used to tell me every single time I'm about to complain about a slight inconvenience in my life is that even if I was wrong from the start, the path I'm taking isn't.

Well, thanks to the wonderful wise words of my Mom, I survived 4 years of my relationship with Dion because I kept thinking that the path we're headed is right even if how he treats me is wrong. I kept believing that our endgame would be like a clink of glass wines in a hotel while admiring the ocean view or something.

"Yes, a very bad dream it is.'' I finally answered, it took a while but Elri was patient with me.

After she had finished brushing my hair she changed my clothes and prepared my breakfast, God knows how much I missed being taken care of like this but Vannesa had the urge to ruin my mood by sitting next to me and demanding Elri to serve her breakfast too.

Elri who is paid to do whatever the kids want has no choice but to obey despite also hating Vannesa for being a brat. She served her the same meal as I have and retreated to the kitchen to avoid being bossed around by Vannesa any longer.

"So," Vannesa started, I didn't really plan to speak to her after knowing everything she did to me in high school but she kept bugging me to go to her theatrical play this afternoon at her school. If I remember correctly she played as the princess and wants to brag about it to me as if I'll get jealous of that cringy pink frilly dress and a plastic crown.

"I'll go, just shut your pie hole already." I interrupted her nonstop blabbering about how beautiful she's going to be later on. She seemed pissed but I don't care. 

We continued eating, this time, the whole dining area was enveloped with silence since Vannesa is skeptical about how I'm behaving. My 7-year-old self was just a quiet and obedient girl who listened to all her selfish desires, the bipolar opposite of what I'm projecting right now so she had her keen eyes locked on me trying to figure out what's wrong. Well, it's better being stared down than hearing her loud squealing voice.

A few hours passed, I had finished my daily tutoring even though it is summer vacation and it is nearly time for Vannesa's theater play. I had no intention to go in the first place but realizing that staying at home the whole day is a boring idea, I should marvel at the beauty of the world while climate change has not ruined it yet.

I changed my clothes once again and called Elri to take me to Vannesa's school which she immediately did. The school was small unlike mine, there were a few people or specifically, parents, entering the venue which is the school's gymnasium. I had assumed that since Vannesa has been bragging me about her play that it is going to be held in a more fancier place. 

I sat at the very back since I don't want to see her arrogant smug face up close since I may have an uncontrollable impulse to throw my shoe at her.

". . ." I stopped and realized. Whatever I do now won't really matter unless it's related to my love life, so actually throwing my shoes at her won't be a problem.

I almost jumped in joy for this has been the first thing listed in my bucket list, to actually hurt her since my parents raised me with pacifist mindset I did not really have a chance to exact my reprisal.

She finally showed up on stage to recite the oh-so-boring introduction of the script, I took this chance to walk along the corner of the gym to avoid detection while untying my shoes. Once I was done removing my shoes and was about to throw it, I looked up and found myself face to face with, drum roll please, Dion Aoki.

"Wha-" I stumbled upon my words, he was just staring at me, confused rather. Probably wondering why I was holding my other shoe in a position to launch it towards Vannesa's face.

"Why are you gonna throw your shoe?" He asked, now a hint of concern in his voice. He possibly wants to avoid me being involved in trouble because the way he asked was like he was also telling me not to do it.

I furrowed my brows and glared daggers at him but he doesn't look scared by it. "Move it, dimwit." I hissed and pushed him to the side so I could have a clear shot. 

I stepped back one foot, pulled myself lower and aimed it to Vannesa's face. I can see that Dion was about to stop me again with a shocking expression but with a swift motion I threw my shoe as hard as I could, all my anger and resentment were transferred into that attack that I'm sure Vannesa would be so ashamed of herself for even ruining my high school life.

When the shoe collided against Vannesa's face, she stumbled down and landed on her butt. The crowd didn't waste a single second to look for the one who did it and immediately spotted me, a kid who is only wearing one shoe.

"What? There's a mosquito on her face." I crossed my arms hoping that they will let me get away but instead ran after me.

Dion instinctively grabbed me by the wrist and pulled me away from the raging mothers who were very excited to see the show play smoothly but is ruined by me throwing a shoe at Vannesa. She deserved more than being thrown a shoe at after all the things she did to me.

Originally, I planned to stick out my middle finger at those who were chasing me, but since I don't want to be grounded by my parents that much, I just stuck my tongue out and that seemed to work very effectively. They are now 10 times angrier than before.

"In here," Dion exclaimed, I nearly forgot that he was actually helping me escape. I was too busy being amused by the mothers' facial expression, I didn't think to piss them off would be so much fun and entertaining.

Eventually, Dion led me to one of the classrooms on the second floor of the building, and eventually, the parents got tired of chasing us and just decided to continue the play with a crying Vannesa. Still likes to play the victim, the only difference is that she's actually the victim this time.

"Well, thank for your help. Although I should have stayed a bit more to watch how she would react." I sat down on top of the teacher's table, looking down on Dion who was still panting and wheezing from running.

Damn, I forgot that he has a very fragile body. He just collapsed yesterday just because I bombarded him with mean things to say what more if he ran. "Why did you help me escape when you couldn't even handle running?" I raised a brow and crossed my arms above my chest, he paused for a few seconds trying to catch his breath. "I am not carrying you this time if you collapse again.'' I scoffed. Of course, I would still be mean to him, he is the reason I'm here and is fooled and will soon disappear from history because I was sent to the wrong timeline.

"You helped me yesterday, I thought that I should help you too." He sat down on one of the seats and fanned himself with his hands, he really couldn't handle running, huh. I continued staring down at him, he must be neglected when he was a baby that he is this frail and weak.

For a moment, there were a bunch of footsteps emanating from the corridors. I assumed that it was the angry mothers ready to face and chastise me for what I've done but dealing with them is much easier than dealing with the fact that I'll disappear in less than 3 months.

When the door opened, I was shocked to see not enraged parents but a bunch of kids just the same as them, mad and furious. I sighed, arms still crossed. "What do you want?"

They did not answer and just went straight to Dion who was still wheezing and gasping for air. One at the front slammed his fist on the desk in front of Dion and yelled. "We know you're the one who threw the shoe! You dare frame Allison for what you did?!"

Shocked, I almost chuckled by their stupidity but kept it inaudible, how could someone like Dion who can't even lift a finger throw a shoe with incredible force that hurled Vannesa's body on the ground.

"We all know Allina is not the kind to hurt someone, she's the sweetest and kindest in the whole neighborhood. " One girl remarked, her voice completely filled with animosity.

Oh, I remember why they would blame Dion, it's because of the me back then always handled things in any way except for violence. Well, whatever, I'm going to disappear anyway.

Thinking back, it was such a boring life. I wouldn't say it is that bad but if you ask me whether I would live the same life again I would definitely refuse without a doubt. I was raised being told what to do and what not to do without even acknowledging what I want, and when I actually set myself free from the chains I was tied to since childhood, it only led to my immediate downfall. In fact, I have come to hate it all. I wish my life had never existed if it is like this.

"Are you gonna ignore us?!" A shout once again brought me back to my current situation. Here I am sitting on top of the teacher's desk, watching over Dion, the person I once treasured so much, being bullied by a bunch of bed-wetting kids. It is kind of amusing yet extremely sad if I think about it, he was always sick, his parents didn't care for him, and everyone in town thinks he is a good for nothing that led to him being bullied.

Maybe this is why he protected me when I was the one in his situation because he knows what it feels like for everyone to turn against you and not believe a single word you say.

Dion kept wheezing, if I meddle with this situation right now then surely, he would fall in love with me in the future if we met again. But since I already failed in avoiding him the moment I arrived here, then my disappearance is surely destined to happen sooner or later so what I do now won't really matter in the future if I won't exist there anymore.

"Keep ignoring us and you know what will happen next," The large kid threatened to punch Dion, he lifted his fist in the air but before he could land it on Dion's face I threw my other shoe at him. 

Everyone gasped in horror and turned their heads to look at me with shocked faces, not really expecting the pacifist daughter of the Alvarez family to throw a shoe at someone.

"Leave him or stay to watch what happens next." I cracked my knuckles as I said those murderous words with the obvious intent to kill whoever touches Dion. As expected, they all ran away as soon as I took a step forward, it is easier to threaten kids than co-workers who put all the work on me.

I looked at Dion and saw him crying, what a child. "They didn't hurt you so stop crying, you wussy." I walked closer to him. He was actually bawling his eyes out and kept gasping for air, if he dies now from asthma then it is definitely my fault.

"Hey, look at me, you're gonna be fine, look there's oxygen everywhere, breathe it in," I said in between wide hand gestures as if pushing all the air towards him since he needs it most than I do.

"Why am I like this?" He mumbled, not really audible from the constant hiccups he makes but I sure heard him. I already made myself hate him with all the fibers of my being but seeing him like this, actually questioning himself why he was being treated badly like this by everyone else made my heart squeeze in pain. 

"Why won't anyone love me?" is such a hard question he just asked.

I love you. Was what I thought I would say in this situation to make him feel better, but if I say that it will bear no result. This will be the end of me. I will disappear if I did the opposite of what I said I would do. Which is to not love him.

"Dion," I said melancholically, I reached for his head and gently patted it which unexpectedly made him calm down. "There is someone out there who loves you, believe me."

He wiped his tears as if to indicate that he is listening to me attentively. His eyes, something about his eyes just felt like home to me.

"You see, I'm actually from the future." What is this?

"I met you there. We have known each other for a lot of years." Why am I saying this? Stop.

"But things didn't go as planned. We fell out of love and we ruined each other." I'm going to disappear if I don't stop, I still have things to do here.

"So I asked someone to take me to the past to fix a few mistakes." Stop this now, why is my mouth moving on its own?

"But I loved every little thing about you."

My body began to feel light, Dion was actually shocked to hear the impossible truth and I couldn't decipher if he believes me or not since everything is becoming so bright, everything that once has a definite form is slowly evaporating into tiny bright orbs, almost identical to the lights I saw in Aeris' office before I arrived here. 

I looked down on my hands and saw that I am also evaporating, slowly and bit by bit turning into bright golden orbs. This is it then, my disappearance. I just didn't expect it to happen so soon. I guess somewhere in me knows that I couldn't just unlove someone so easily.

I saw Dion and he was crying, and the thing always do when I see him cry is to hug him. I embraced his small figure with my glowing arms and waited till my whole body dispersed into and joined the wind.

"Goodbye, Dion." I whispered to his ear, completely bathed in a warm golden glow before my body dispersed and joined with the air.