TWICE MATED

Abandoned yet again

ANAIAH’S POV

I found myself missing Michael more than before was all that I could think about, especially when I wasn’t with Maximilian. I felt as if everything that I did reminded me of him, and I hated it. Why couldn’t I just forget him and live in this present moment? What I hated the most was the fact that the feelings that I was still harboring for him were making me wonder if he was feeling the same way as I did. Did he also miss me? Did he wonder where I was or what had happened to me after he abandoned me in the forest and left me for dead? Could he feel that I was still alive or he had just found another female to replace me? If he had found another female to replace me, did she know what he had done to me or that he had rejected someone else before she came along? I had a lot of questions and most of which couldn’t be answered by anyone but Michael, and if I asked him myself. I also had a few questions for the moon goddess even though we had been taught never to question the will of the moon goddess, but there were things that I didn’t understand, things that I would have loved for her to explain to me. Surely she didn’t owe me any explanation for anything she did, but this was my life, and I felt that I had the right to know why certain things were thrown my way. I also wondered if I would forgive him and make things right with him if he begged me for forgiveness. I knew that I would never be able to look at him the same, and forgiving him would be a challenge for me.

I wanted to know what she was thinking when she mated me to Michael first. Why couldn’t she bring me Max before Michael, and why were the two of them my mates? I needed to know why she was doing this to me. What offense had I ever committed to deserve such confusion and heartbreak in my life? I also couldn’t help wondering how those would eventually end. As far as I was concerned, it was going to end with me heartbroken again. I would be forced to make a choice and choose between Michael and Max, and I wasn’t sure if my heart would be able to do that. Max was the obvious choice, but if I chose him, would the feelings that I still had for Michael miraculously disappear? What was going to happen if Max finally found out or figured out why I had been abandoned by my pack and turned into a rogue? What would he say when he realized that I had lied to him from the moment we met? Would be able to forgive me or would he want nothing to do with me for the rest of his life? These were the things that I needed to know. I had to know these things, and I had to understand. Even though things were progressing well between Max and me, I still had to know and understand why certain things had happened to me and why the moon goddess allowed them to happen.

Max was the mate that should have been sent to me and the only mate that I should have been given. Maybe another thing that made me feel like he was the one I deserved was the fact that he was just a rogue. In the eyes of all the alpha, me and him were the same and the only thing that differentiated us was the size of your wolves. I had never seen him in his wolf form, but I imagined that he probably had a very huge wolf. Max was so tender and loving and he always melted me just by the way he looked at me. When I first came here I felt like my heart had a gaping hole in it, but he slowly started filling that hole with his love. Of course, there were some things that would never go away, but having him here with me made things a whole lot better for me. Was it too early for me to say that I was in love with him? Was I even allowed to feel this way for him when my mate was already out there? But what if Max was my other mate as I initially assumed? What if the moon goddess had indeed given me two mates? Was that even possible?

I wished I had a friend that I could trust, a friend that would tell me what these feelings meant or at least help me figure out what they meant. A friend would advise me on what to do, but I was just so alone and there was no way that I was going to make friends in this place because, even though we were all a bunch of nobodies, they all thought that they were better than me. If I were to tell any of them of my predicament, they would not only make fun of me, but they would probably also make sure that they bad-mouthed me to the max. They would probably use the information against me because they wanted to take my place. All I could do was pray that one day, all this would be clarified for me. In the meantime, I would have to accept that these wolves hadn’t accepted me. I always felt left out, and maybe sometimes my insecurities got the better of me and made me isolate myself, but I knew when I wasn’t accepted. The only person who actually wanted me here was Max, and that was the reason I was doing my best to make him happy by doing whatever he asked me.

For some reason, I allowed Max to convince me to join some of the female wolves as they went out shopping. There was going to be a party to celebrate with me soon and he suggested that I acquaint myself with them so that I could get some friends. Of course, this wasn’t something that I was keen on, but what choice did I have? He obviously didn’t like the fact that I was spending a lot of time alone, and I knew that it would mean a lot to him if I made an effort with his pack members. I really wanted to make an effort with them, but I felt like this was just going to backfire, and I realized I was right as soon as we sat down for lunch after buying a few clothes.

“You know I don’t understand why she was the chosen one. Everyone knows that I am perfect for this role. I am supposed to be the queen” I heard Anna whisper.

“I don’t think she is his mate, I think she seduced him”, her friend, whose name I didn’t care to know, answered. This had been something that I had been going through ever since I went out with those girls, and I had been trying so hard to ignore them as they gossiped and laughed behind my back. I had heard enough.

“You know I can hear you guys,” I said, and they kept pausing before they all burst out laughing.

“You think we care that you can hear us? What makes you think we didn’t want you to hear us?” Anna asked.

“I just honestly think you are not fit for that role” she added.

“I don’t know what makes you think I care about what you think. I am not mated to you, and my mate has confidence in me, and that is all that matters. You should maybe try to focus your energy on finding a mate for yourself.” I said and I could see that I hit a nerve when I said that. She cleared her throat and looked straight into my eyes as if trying to intimidate me.

”You know everyone can see that you are having a hard time,” Anna said, and the other two girls giggled. She was like the ring leader, and they listened to everything she said and literally copied everything she did. I felt like I was outnumbered.

“I am doing just fine,” I said shyly, and they laughed again.

”You are supposed to be the Luna, and you can’t even look at me in the eye. That alone proves my point” she said.

”Max should have just stuck to me, I would have made a better queen. I would have helped him rule with power” she said, and it seemed as if all the girls we were sitting with agreed with her.

“You are just an omega… and something tells me you are an omega with secrets. Why did Alpha Michael kick you out in such a sad way?” she asked me, and I wasn’t about to answer her questions, I didn’t owe her any explanation.

”I don’t know,” I said. “Maybe you can go and ask him yourself. You might find that he is the one you were mated with” I said, and she frowned at me.

“I heard she was accused of witchcraft” one girl suggested, and I knew I was doomed. This had been my excuse to Max when I first arrived, but I was afraid of sharing it with Anna because she would use it as her biggest weapon against me.

“She is a witch then…she probably tried to bewitch Michael in the same way she had done to our king,” she said, and they all laughed.

” Let's leave before she casts a spell on us” she suggested, and the other girls didn’t seem to agree with her for the first time.

“I don’t think that is a very good idea. What if the alpha hears of it? He will kill us” the blonde one said, and Anna laughed.

“He won't, he will thank us for doing him a favor and ditching her. And besides, we will tell him she started acting weird and tried to cast a spell on me. She is obviously jealous of my beauty”, Anna said, and my eyes welled up not because I was being called a witch, but because I was about to be homeless yet again.

“You are right,” the blonde said, and they all giggled as they stood up and walked away, leaving me in the restaurant. I watched them walk away with a slight hope that they would come back after realizing that what they were doing was wrong, but none did. I was left alone, and I had to find a new home for myself. Was this the kind of life that I was destined for?

”Excuse me Miss…how would you like to settle your bill?” the waitress asked me, and I realized that they had left me with more than one problem.

“I am sorry, but I have nothing on me,” I said, avoiding any eye contact with him because I was so ashamed that I didn’t have anything that I could use to settle this bill.

So the waitress called the manager on me and instead of calling the police on me, he decided that a much more suitable punishment would be for me to do all the dishes and clean the kitchen after the restaurant closed. I couldn’t tell them how grateful I was to them and that their punishment was more like them lending me a helping hand. I could stay here a little longer while I try to figure out my next move. Washing the dishes had always been my favorite thing back in Michael’s pack because it was a way for me to clear my head. I hoped that they wouldn’t think I did this on purpose because I was enjoying washing the dishes.

“You are lucky…” the manager said, and he walked in just as I was about to towel the dishes.

“Someone is here to bail you out if you had to me.” Your husband is Max. I would have let you out with a warning” he added, and I was puzzled by what he was talking about.

”Max is here?” I asked as I stormed out of the kitchen and ran to where he was. I threw my arms around him as soon as I could because I was so afraid that I would never see him again.

”Thank goodness you came for me. I thought I would never see you again,” I said.

“You can’t get rid of me that easily,” he said with a smile that quickly faded, and I could see that he was pissed. Why was he angry with me? I wasn’t the one who asked to be left here. He held my hadn’t tight and led me to his car without saying another word to me. I was now scared." What was I going to say to him?

“So what happened?” he asked me.

”They left me. They said they were doing me a favor by leaving me, and they said that I was trying to bewitch them”, I said.

“What did you do to make them think you were trying to bewitch them?” he asked me, and I couldn’t believe what he was asking me. Was she blaming me for being accused?

“Are you blaming me for being bullied?” I asked him in disbelief, “because if you are, then maybe you should have left me in that place”, I added, and he shook his head.

“I am not blaming you, I just don’t understand why they would do this if you didn’t even provoke them,” he said, and I rolled my eyes.

“Just admit that your pack members are weird and that Anna is a real b***h” I said, raising my voice and he was as surprised as I was when I raised my voice.

”At least one good thing came out of this…you have your claws out. I just wish you had done the same when you were feeling attacked by them” he said as he started the car and drove off.

I was tired, I was tired of allowing everyone to walk all over me and I was tired of always feeling like I was their victim. I had to stand up for myself even if that would piss Max off. I had lived all of my life as a slave in Michael’s pack and everyone walked all over me. This was a chance for me to start standing up for myself. I had had enough and I was going to start giving as much as I got. I was the queen of this pack and they would have to start showing me some respect whether they liked it or not.