The Princess and the Soldier

Mom's advice

Alya POV

“My parents are here. I didn’t let them take the day off. And it was just right to give my respects to the King and Queen. And… I wanted to see you.”

I was not prepared for everything that was happening. His presence was unwelcome. His words kept on throwing me off this morning.

I was not able to speak after what he said. His face softened as he looked back at me.

“Alya. Can we talk? Can we talk about what happened in the past?”

“There is nothing to talk about, Leo,” I replied firmly.

“Please? For the sake of our friendship. Or at least for the sake of our parents who were worried for both of us. I know John is also having a hard time—”

“John is having a hard time? What? Taking sides? Knowing where his loyalty lies?” I felt a burning feeling inside of me. My raging emotions were clawing their way out. “Were you both ganging up on me?”

“No. No. Don’t think about us like that, Alya.” I knew John was also keeping secrets from me. I can hope that those secrets were only to keep me from breaking. “John is a very protective brother.”

I closed my eyes and took several deep breaths to calm myself. I may be charming but I was also known to have a bad temper. At this time, I didn’t want to be mad first thing in the morning. Well, John made me grumpier during breakfast. I didn’t need the stress at the moment.

“Alya. My princess.” I cannot help it. A tear escaped my eye. I opened my eyes and there he was right by my side, kneeling on one knee. “I’m sorry.” He whispered as he wiped my tear with his thumb.

“I have to work,” I said coldly.

“I will wait for you at the rooftop tonight. Be there at eight.” He stood up and bent forward to leave a kiss at the top of my head. “Please see me.” He said so softly that I would have given in to his request to talk right then and there. But I did not move nor speak. I did not reply.

He then stood up and moved towards the door.

He’s going out the door! Call him! Follow him!

Leo turned around as I was about to call him.

“Tell your Dad that I will just send you the schedule for the training. I didn’t want to take much of your time off work. Good day, my princess.” He took a bow and in a second, he was no longer in my office.

And right then I called my secretary to tell her that I would be unavailable all throughout the morning because of a headache. I went to my room and cried for I-don’t-know-how-long.

Why did it hurt so much to see Leo again?

Why did I still long for him?

I was sobbing and I didn’t hear my door opening. I only felt a hand rubbing my back. When I looked up to see who it was, it was Mom.

“Mom.” I lunged at her and hugged her tightly.

“There. There.” She shifted to make me fall on her lap. She was soothing my hair and rubbing my back at the same time. “I heard that you are having a headache, so I came to see you. It didn’t occur to me that it would be heartache instead.”

I sobbed loudly at that.

“Why does it still hurt, Mom?”

“I didn’t know how to answer that, princess. Tell me. What do you feel about Leo?”

Of course, Mom would want to hear it from me first even when I know that she knows already that I have loved Leo for the longest time. I was hurt that he only saw me as a best friend or a sister. It did not occur to me that way but only after when we saw him with his girlfriend. All those times that he was so sweet to me, when he had called me his princess, when he promised that he will stay with me and support me all throughout, they were all lies. He made me feel so special that I thought that he felt the same way towards me. Those letters that I had written for him and supposedly had given to him, I poured my heart and soul and had revealed how much he means to me. But I burned them all after that day.

“I loved him, Mom. But he didn’t feel the same way.” I whispered when I had controlled my sobbing.

“Did you tell him? Was he aware of your feelings?”

“Yes. No. I don’t know.”

“You see, princess, boys or men wouldn’t know what you feel unless you tell them straight. You knew that your Dad and I were best friends. I have shown him support in everything that he did. I was thoughtful and sweet to him. But he only saw me as his best friend. However, I didn’t know that he has also feelings for me back then. He did not tell me because he was afraid that I would reject him.”

“But, Mom, he had a girlfriend. What does it say about me? He chose another girl. And the sad thing was, he did not tell me that he liked another girl. We were best friends. He didn’t even tell John.”

“We wouldn’t know the answer. It’s either you take the risk or live your life not knowing what you might have missed.”

“I was to tell him, Mom. I wrote him letters. But I did not give them to him when he went to the academy.” I felt Mom sigh.

“Well, that was the past. Do you still love him?”

“I don’t know, Mom.”

“Why not move on, Alya? Talk to him. Set your feelings free. Tell him all the feelings and thoughts that were bottled up in there. Settle the past first before you talk about the present, whether to be friends again or be strangers moving forward.”

I thought hard about what Mom said. It was not actually Leo who was hurting me. It was me, myself. I have all these emotions inside me that I have not released all these years.

“Leo is an understanding person, Alya. I am sure he would listen to you. But also, be understanding enough too, and listen to what he will tell you. Know that I would love him to be your boyfriend, even your future husband. But if it would not work out the way that we wanted then we have to let go.”

Mom’s words were definitely soothing to my mind and soul. She may be a nurse of physical bodies, but she also takes care of a person’s inner well-being.

“Thanks, Mom,” I whispered as she continued to rub my back. “I think I know what to do.”

“You are most welcome, my princess. Take the whole day off if you needed more rest. I will handle your dad.”