Shadow wolves: Virgin mate (Book 3) - Complete

Chapter 7 - Assumptions is the mother of all ...

Star

“The warm water should help, and you are relaxed, aren’t you?” He breathed next to me again, his voice raspy with lust.

“I trust you.” I said, and he picked me up suddenly, kissing me hard and fast. I felt his big hard pe.nis ready to push into me. Please, goddess, don’t let it hurt. I relaxed my body when he pushed me up against the wall to steady us.

“Are you ready? I will only put in a little bit, okay?” He looked unsure, but I nodded, my breathing heavy and my heart raced. He took his pe.nis and put the tip inside, making me scream with pain. He held it there until the pain subsided.

“You, okay?” He asked me when I calmed down, looking worried that I might tell him to stop or want to leave him.

“Yes, please a little more.” It hurt, but not as much as it did before. He held me tight, moved more than I had expected and felt my muscles stretch. It hurt, but not as much as before. The pain was getting less. “More.” I whispered.

“Babe, I can’t.” He growled hoarsely. “I already slipped and went too far, and I really want to fu.ck you until you scream my name. I don’t want to hurt you, and you are making it really tough on me.” He begged.

“You asked first, lover. Now more.” I demanded and he pushed in more than before. This time I moaned. It felt better and better. The pain turned into a sort of pleasure. He suddenly stopped.

“Babe, look at me.” He looked very serious. “We need to stop. Any further and you will hurt badly. I don’t want you hurt. You will reject me.” His brain was fighting his heart, fighting his lust. I could see it. I, unfortunately for him, had reached that point every girl reaches. We were there, and now we were going to get it over with. Everyone said the first time hurts, and I wanted to get to the part where it wouldn’t hurt anymore. I tightened my grip around his waist. “Babe, no. You are too tight.” He begged. “We are not doing this.” He started pulling out, slowly. Not to hurt me, I guessed, but I caught him off guard and pulled him fast and hard tightly towards me with my legs. Pain shot through me as if I was being torn in half. I screamed as if I was being torn in half. “NO!” He screamed, but it was too late.

“We are mated.” I whispered in his ear as tears ran down my cheeks. How could cleaning yourself become having s*x? I needed another shower after my first shower! He put me down and cleaned me, looking sad.

“I am so sorry, Star. I did it again! It was not supposed to have happened like this!” He sounded furious. I stood there wide-eyed, hurting so badly that I couldn’t really walk. If I could, I would have run. I would have run as far away as I could, ashamed. I covered my breasts with one arm and my pus.sy with my other hand. Saying and thinking pus.sy now made me feel dirty. Tears ran down my face, hidden by the shower water. I let him carry me to the bedroom, and he helped me get dressed. My tears had dried up by now.

“I would like to move back to my room.” I asked, not looking him in the eyes.

“Yes, of course. Anything you want, Star.” He replied, helping me pack my things. We didn’t talk on the way to my room, or hold hands. I opened the door, and he followed me, wanting to help me unpack because I was in pain and would struggle to do it on my own.

“It’s fine, Luc. You don’t have to.” I told him, looking down on the ground, holding the doorknob in my hand.

“Oh, okay … I guess, I will see you soon?” He looked at me quickly and then left as if he couldn’t stand the sight of me any longer. I closed the door and the tears started rushing down my cheeks as I slid down the door into a fetal position. I didn’t know what happened. We mated, then he was angry, but I was happy. It hurt like hell! But I was happy. What had we done that he wanted to be different? He didn’t want it to happen that way? What was he sorry about? Was he sorry that he chose me? Stupid, stupid girl! If only I had tried dating or something, maybe watched the movies instead of closing my eyes every time they kissed! I would have known what to do! I stood up, opened the covers of my bed, climbed in, and pulled them over my head as tears streamed down my face.

“Dearest Star.” I heard a female voice. “Please look at me.” It was Mist.

“I can’t.” I cried from underneath the covers.

“Yes, you can, you choose not to.” She sounded like a mother would sound. I peeked from underneath.

“What?” Red eyed from crying. I didn’t want to show more than just my eyes. I felt like a disgrace. Disgusting. Lower than the mud underneath a slug!

“Now stop those thoughts.” She reprimanded me. “You are just acting like a three-year-old who did not get what she wanted. Get up and see what I brought you.” She pulled away the covers and held a bowl of chocolate pudding.

“Do you hang around listening to everyone?” I asked, sounding slightly disgusted.

“No, we don’t. That would be invading their privacy. We do, however, feel when we are needed, like your heart ache now.” She tucked a strayed piece of hair behind my ear. “You know your fiery red hair reminds me of my great-grandmother. Oh, she was a handful. My poor grandfather grew gray hair every day they were together. He was completely gray by the time he was thirty-five, if I remember correctly.” I couldn’t help but laugh.

“But I thought all seekers were women?” I frowned.

“We are, but we have to come from somewhere?” She shrugged at me, making us both laugh. “There, there is that beautiful face I have come to like so much.” She held my chin in her hand. “Do you want to tell me about your heartache?” She discreetly asked. Luc had made sure everyone knew about us, and she would know with me being back in my room that Luc and I had a fight or something.

“No, thank you Mist.” I didn’t want to look at her.

“I am here, you know? Your girls might all be off being all sorts of weird creatures, but you are special. The only one of your kind in this world of many of the same. You can always talk to me at any time. I will keep your secrets safe, fight for you and protect you no matter what.” I had no idea where all that came from, but I was glad she said it.

“Thank you, Mist,” I smiled shyly, and gave her a hug. “Hearing you say that has already made me feel better. Would you mind asking them to bring my food to my room for a while? I don’t want to see Luc for now.” I added, and she gave me a nod, taking the empty bowl from me.

“Rest now. I will check in with you later.” She disappeared into thin air as seekers always did. I sometimes wish I could do that. What was I saying, I sometimes wished I could do all of it. They looked so cool having all these powers. I got up and walked to the bathroom to wash my tear-stained face. Seeing myself in the mirror was not a great idea. I looked pale, and my eyes were bloodshot from all the crying. I had turned into a zombie. I put on some comfy pj’s, climbed back into bed, and it didn’t take long for sleep to grab me. My dreams were full of images of bodies intertwined, kissing, rubbing, sweaty love-making. Suddenly, he sat in a chair having a drink. I was lying naked on the bed, begging to be touched, squirming, moaning.

“Why would I touch a disgusting human? You are so small you even scream when I try and fu.ck you. You are not worth my time.” He growled, while talking to me. I couldn’t go anywhere. An invisible force pinned me to the bed. He stood up from the chair and opened the door. Turning back to look at me, he laughed. I woke up hearing myself scream.

“Star, finally you are awake. You were having a nightmare, and I was trying to wake you.” Mist was standing beside me. She wiped the tears from my cheeks. “What happened … Has it hurt you so much, that you think so little of yourself?” She frowned. All I could do was nod. I was the assistant. The background runner made sure everything was running along smoothly. “Let me guess, your hair is a way of expressing who you would like to be?” She hit it right on the head.

“Yes,” I whispered. “I used to work for a guy who thought he was treating me like his princess, but I felt more like a pony on display. Don’t get me wrong, we were good friends and I appreciated what he tried to do …” I sighed.

“But a better self-image can’t be bought.” She finished my sentence saying what I was going to say,

“Yes, that.” I conceded.

“You know, Star, everyone feels that way. We all feel we are never good enough. We wonder have we done this right or what that one thinks of us.” She sat back with her hands calmly placed on her lap.

“No, you can’t, you are a seeker, all of you glow with perfect light. There is no way you could feel like that.” I shook my head. The next moment, a seeker appeared.

“This is Forest. Forest, I would like you to meet Star.” She walked up to me and took my hand in hers.

“Hi Star, seems we are both named after exquisitely beautiful things.” Forest smiled.

“See now, that is cheating.” I said, looking at Mist.

“Ah Star, what are we?” Mist shrugged. I … I couldn’t fight anymore. Seekers of truth can’t cheat like this. They always told the truth. Straight as it was, whether it hurt or not.

“Hi, Forest.” I smiled shyly. They both stood up from the bed, each taking a hand to pull me up.

“Now Star, that was enough moping around.” Forest laughed and it sounded like fairy bells ringing.

“But I have hardly started moping! Human moping lasts for weeks!” I complained when they pulled me to the bathroom.

“Go take a shower, then you will feel better.” Mist shoved me into the bathroom, closing the door behind me.

“Yes, mother.” I rolled my eyes.

“I heard that!” She yelled and I rolled my eyes again. I had clearly run into a mother figure. All cleaned up and freshly dressed, I walked out of the bathroom expecting them both to be standing there, but the room was empty, my bed was made and a fruit breakfast with tea was ready and waiting.

“What is it with this place and tea??!” I moaned as I sat down and looked at the plate of fruit. Well, I did ask them to bring my food for me. I didn’t specify what I wanted. I was hungry and started eating some of the grapes. They were sweet and better yet, they were seedless. There was a banana, some strawberries and an apple. The tea wasn’t that bad, actually. It had honey in it and that made up for the rest. I stood up, got the tray and walked out the door, nearly smashing everything against me as I walked straight into Luc.

“Babe! Sorry Star. I’m sorry. I should have looked where I was going. I am sorry. Sorry, I will walk the other way next time.” He looked so broken and hurt, but turned around, and before I could say anything, he was gone. I sighed. Yip, story of my life. Forest found me handing in my tray in the kitchen. Grabbing my hand, she dragged me out of there looking all excited and happy. Luc was sitting in the far corner at the back, not looking up. Forest moved so fast I couldn’t see more than a flash of him, and we were out of the room.