Learning to Love

Chapter 20

After all the drama from the rodeo and not being able to withstand Bianca poisonous glares for a moment longer, Trev dropped Kadence home. Unable to get any sleep, she decided to start making progress on her and Trev’s meals for the week and hopefully catch Amanda between her runway show and a party.

Placing the phone on loudspeaker, she started to gather the ingredients for her cheesy, chicken, bacon and pasta dish and was excited when her best friends voice come down the line.

“I thought my ears were burning,” Amanda answered the phone.

“Oh, it’s so good to hear your voice.” Kadence replied gleefully. “Tell me, where are you right now?”

“Would you die if I told you I’m at the Moulin Rouge?” Amanda teased cheekily, and Kadence groaned wishing she was right there with her.

“Have I told you sometimes I don’t like you?” Kadence laughed, and she could picture Amanda’s grin on the other end of the line.

“Franz actually paid for a few of us to join in with the can- can dancers…” she paused for effect, “Along with himself…”

“Oh, he didn’t!” Kadence had to stop chopping the vegetable to muffle her giggles. Amanda’s boss Franz was the epitome of crazy French designer and always said and did the most inappropriate things without a care in the world. “Please tell me you’ll have someone recording all this, right?”

“Don’t you worry about missing any of the action, I’ll send it to you as soon as it’s finished.” She replied cheerily. “Now, enough about me, what’s been happening with you? How’s the new school?”

“The school is amazing and the people are all friendly,” all except eagle eye and Bianca thought Kadence, “I’m really glad to took this opportunity.”

“Buuuuut…?” drawled Amanda, “I can hear a but in there.”

“Not a but per say,” Kadence began and decided to just let it all out, “Richard and I broke up and…” before Kadence could even finish her sentence, Amanda was ‘whooping’ down the line.

“Oh, thank god for that!” Amanda exclaimed, “Honey, he has been like a dead weight in your relationship for far too long.

“I know… it’s just…” Kadence began.

“It’s just you have a big heart and always try to find the best in people,” Amanda finished for her, “But that man is clearly broken in every possible way and was dragging your down with him.”

“He’s changed Amanda. And not in a good way.” Kadence said worriedly, “I’m really worried about him. I think he needs to see someone.”

“Well, thank the heavens that’s no longer you.” Amanda put in, “You’ve cut those ties, now let them fall to the floor. It’s no longer your problem.”

“I know, but-” Kadence started.

“No. No, but.” Amanda said firmly. “Let. Him. Go.”

Kadence’s hand travelled back up around her neck and was thankful Amanda couldn’t see her or she’d flip out even more. “You’re right. I know you’re right. I’ll just concentrate on making a real go of my time here.”

“Good to hear that.” Amanda agreed, “Now, I have to head off shortly to go get dolled up, but tell me, how’s the potential out there?”

“The potential?” Kadence asked confused, did she mean her job and potential for her to stay?

“Yeah, you know, the hot guys.” Amanda stated as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. “Anyone strike your fancy?”

“Amanda I’ve just got out of a long-term relationship!” Kadence gasped at her friends’ audacity but laughed despite herself.

“That wasn’t exactly a no.” Amanda pointed out and Kadence could feel a blush warming her cheeks, “But, I’ll have to dig a little further next time because I’m being waved over sorry.”

“Oh, have an amazing time and make sure you send me photos!” Kadence called after her and they both hung up.

Looking back around the kitchen, she wondered back to Amanda’s question. What exactly were the rules of dating and how long are you supposed to wait between the end of one relationship and the start of a new one. 

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Matt was exhausted after spending the whole day in the sun, rounding up rogue bulls and helping the cowboys off their bucking bronc’s; not to mention everyone’s highlight of the day, when a gorgeous blonde enigma came out of nowhere to save one of their own. It’ll certainly be the gossip around the town for the next few weeks at least.

He could still hardly believe the sight of her standing between little Dane and Jasper, as the bull charged, full steam ahead with eyes solely on the intruder of the pen. It was like watching that night with Vanessa all over again, except this time, he wasn’t prepared to watch another person he cared about die before their time.

Matt slowed the car down as he approached her house and felt a twinge of disappointment that all her lights were off. He really needed to see with his own eyes that she was alright, but it would have to wait until morning; he couldn’t justify waking her just for his own selfish reasons. Putting his foot more heavily on the accelerator, he put the ute back into third and continued on towards his house.

Matt reached out his hand to interlace his work roughened fingers with her delicate smooth ones; he beautiful dough-eyed gaze locked onto his as their friends, well, her friends, Roger and Michelle sat in the front bickering for the 18th time that night. Their on again – off again relationship was like a rollercoaster ride and Matt couldn’t wait to get off it with Vanessa at their stop.

“You drive like such a girl,” Michelle antagonised him, “Where’s the adrenalin? The fun?” she pouted awaiting Roger’s reaction.

“You want adrenalin and fun? Watch this?” Roger called over to her before picking up speed and pulling the break lever as he spun the steering wheel to the left causing it to skid on the gravel into a 180 degree turn, fishtailing a little before continuing on down the road.

Matt felt Vanessa squeeze his fingers in fear and he pulled her closer, tucking her into his shoulder.

“Woooo,” squealed Michelle, clearly enjoying her drunken abandon, “Do it again! Do it again, Roger!” she said flirtatiously to Roger, who was clearly enjoying feeling like a man instead of the girl she’d called him earlier.

“Okay, mate, I think that’s about enough,” Matt called to the front, anticipating Roger’s flared masculinity to show off in front of his girl again.

“Oh don’t listen to him, Roger.” She stroked her finger flirtatiously down his arm, “He’s not a real man, like you.” She practically purred before unbuckling her seatbelt and planting a long and passionate kiss on his lips.

The action made the car steer over the center line causing Vanessa to scream. Matt watched as a set of lights crest the hill and saw a truck barreling towards them.

“Watch out!” he yelled, causing Roger to brake off the kiss; hastily trying to rip the steering wheel in the opposite direction and back into their lane, but the sharp action caused the car to plane along the gravel and spin back into the direction of the truck.

Matt knew any second now the truck was going to hit them, and he grabbed hold of Vanessa and braced for the impact. The last thing he saw before pulling her closer was Vanessa’s brown eyes widen in fear, the headlight illuminating her face like an angel, until the sound of screeching metal as it crumpled from the impact forced their bodies to violently jolt apart. He remembered them reaching for each other, fingers just grazing before the side of the car was stripped away, taking Roger and Vanessa with it as they took the full brunt of the impact. He could hear Michelle’s scream, but it sounded miles away as the metallic taste of blood pieced his senses and glass shattered around him. He could feel his body being thrown around like a rag doll as the trucks tyres rolled over the front of the car, no doubt crushing Michelle’s legs in the process and he heard her screams fade into deafening silence, until everything went black.

Matt woke up with a start, his body slick with sweat from the vivid memory of the accident that took Vanessa’s life away. He remembered waking up from the coma, his mother clucking his hand as she half sat, half lay on the bed beside him. It took a while for the dryness of his throat to subside, but his mother woke from sheer motherly instinct. One look into her sorrow filled eyes and he knew Vanessa was gone, a lone tear stained down his cheek as he absorbed the news and tried to remain strong for his exhausted looking mother, but she buckled after seeing that tear and they both sobbed together for all that had been lost and his very lucky escape.

Matt rubbed a hand down his face and turned for a glass of water, hoping to memories would recede, but he was having no such luck. Kicking his sheets off, he walked out onto the back veranda and looked out at the full moon glowing high in the sky, letting the calmness of the night settle into his bones before sitting and letting his mind drift back again to memories he’d spent years trying to forget.

Once his mum could finally speak, she explained that they’d been driving home from a party when their car swerved into oncoming traffic and they were hit by a truck. He and Michelle had been taken to hospital, with Michelle’s legs being completely crushed and needing to be amputated, so she was flown into the city with her parents where she would have a long journey through physical therapy. They’d both been in a coma for about a month, meaning they’d missed Vanessa’s funeral and Roger’s as well of course, which on one hand was somewhat of a blessing. He didn’t know how he’d ever be able to face all those people, especially her parents after not being able to save their only daughter. Her parents had also sold their property and moved away into the city; they couldn’t bare to stay in that house full of memories any longer.

All evidence from the forensics pointed to Roger being at fault but it didn’t stop the survivors guilt he felt and still feels to this day. That’s why he couldn’t move on and worked so hard to prove he made something out of his survival, not just for him, but for her.  

He didn’t have to wonder what brought back this dark memory, after seeing the fear in Kadence’s eyes, he’s was taken back to that night in the car almost immediately and had to wrangle to stop it from suffocating him, and get on with protecting her, like he couldn’t Vanessa.

With his mind finally now through the turmoil those memories always dragged up, he was able to fall into a somewhat resigned sleep out on the daybed on the veranda.