WINNING HER HEART

WHY I AM EVEN ALIVE

Sara's P.O.V.

I cried silently under the shower. I was now sitting on the washroom floor under the shower. The cold water was continuously washing the tears that were falling from my eyes. He didn't know a thing about me yet he accused me of cheating. He didn't know a thing about what I had suffered in the past, yet he made fun of hard work. I was the daughter of Thomas White. Everyone thought so highly of me having so much power and wealth. No one knew my status in my family. They didn’t know that I had to earn even my daily meals just because I was not her biological daughter. Yeah… this was the bitter truth of my existence.

I put my head on the wall back behind me and remembered the day when my mother told me about my biological father and the story behind my birth. That day, my father didn’t hurt me physically but her bitter words shattered my heart into million pieces. I was only ten and I didn’t understand what I had ever done to treat me like trash. When my mother told me that I was from her first fiancée that died in a car accident, then I realized that I was really trash. My father’s family refused to acknowledge my mother as their son’s fiancée and then she was forced by her father to marry Mr Thomas White for the sake of family reputation and social image.

He married my mother for the benefits that he was getting from my grandfather but never accepted me. For him, I was a liability, a dirty ugly patch on his clean image. He let my mother have me but never treated me as his family member. That was why I was bullied by everyone in my family. My mother’s silent cries and pleas kept me from standing against their tortures. She neither stopped them nor supported me ever. I was just a liability for her too and now…. I didn’t know what I was now.

Though I was COO of his company, yet he deducted my half salary as an instalment of what he had spent on me since after my birth. I remembered that I asked him once when the situation became unbearable for me to stand that why did he let my mother have me? His answer broke everything inside me that time. I had this hope that one day he would recognize me but that day… I lost every hope inside me. He said that he did that because my grandfather agreed to marry my mother to him on the condition that he would let me be born. He said that he tried two three-times to kill me in a way that everything looked like an accident but I was too determined to be born that I survived every time.

I looked up at the roof as if I was asking God why he let me be born in this cruel world when there was no hope, no love, no life for me. I was like a living corpse with a dead soul who knew only how to breathe. I didn’t know why I was even alive. Everyone hates me so much and there was nothing that could keep me alive. Then why????? Why was even I breathing?????

“Sara… are you inside, honey?” I heard someone calling me but didn’t move from my place. My whole body and mind were numb now. My eyes were stoned and heavy and I had an urge to close them. I didn’t know how long I sat here but I was right now at peace. I felt that I had lost every sense of mine. I closed my eyes and then everything went black.

I felt that I was having a dream right now as I was in a beautiful garden. The head of the sun was so refreshing and warm. I was in a beautiful sundae dress and I was now running in that garden behind a beautiful butterfly that was flying in front of me. I was laughing while spreading my arm completely to feel the brush of air through every part of my body. It was so peaceful and refreshing. I had seen this dream so many times in the past and it always helped feeling peace in my heart. Call me a coward but I found my solace here… in my dreamland.

The singings of birds around me were like a melodious song. I lay down on the green grass facing the sky. The sky was clear with a few pure white clouds making different kinds of funny images over there. I didn’t know what place this was but it was my heaven. I could live here till my last breath. No one is here to judge me…. To mock me…. To make me feel inferior… to make me feel unwanted…. The butterflies fled around me as if she wanted to play with me. I felt wanted here… in this world. I felt someone calling me from a very distant but I didn’t listen to that voice as I didn’t want to hear anything else than birds chirping around me. I refused to wake up because I didn’t want to wake up.

Naomi’s P.O.V.

I was angry at my son because of how did he behave with Sara tonight. For him, she didn’t exist in his world then why did he has to wrong her in front of the whole restaurant there. When I got the call from Emily who told me what happened there, I was just startled to hear what he did to Sara. He was about to hit her but stopped himself and I was glad that he did because if he had raised his hand on innocent Sara tonight then I didn’t know whether I was going to acknowledge him as my son or not. He accused her of cheating on him when he barely met her once after their marriage two months ago and he was there with another girl.

“Do you really think that we did well by marrying her with our son?” I asked Alexander. We were sitting inside the cover in our room. He sighed deeply and looked up. “I can’t say now that we took the right decision for her. We ruined her already shattered life”, he said in a sad tone and I felt tears start building up in my eyes. “He didn’t know what she had suffered all these years and I don’t think that he will ever understand her pain. He is just …. (I sighed)… hopeless”, A tear escaped from the corner of my eye that I wiped immediately.

“Keep him away from her as much as you can, Naomi. This is the only thing that we can do for her if we don’t want her to be hurt again”, my husband’s words pierced my heart badly. Sara was an image of the dream daughter that one could have. I pity her father’s fate that he never cared about her. He was such a disgrace in the name of the father. I felt my husband’s hand around my shoulders and I leaned down at him. “Can’t we send her away from here? We have so many branches in different countries. We can send her to any branch. I am sure that she will agree on this”, I looked up at him with hopeful eyes and He pursed his lips while thinking.

“I think we can do this. It will take some time…. But”, he looked back at me and smiled. “We can do this”, his words made me smile this time. It would be good for her if she goes far from here. Then she didn’t have to deal with her father or my son, her husband. “I … think.. I should check on her once before sleep… what do you say?” I didn’t know why I felt an urge to see her right now. “You should go otherwise you will not able to sleep”, he said with a caring smile on his face and I immediately pecked his lips and smiled. “I will be back soon”, I said and almost ran out of the room towards her room. I knocked on her door but she didn’t answer me. I knocked again but she again didn’t answer. I thought that she had slept but the thought didn’t settle in my guts. I knew that it would be bad to unlock her room without her knowledge but my heart was racing in my chest now.

I went to the study where we had kept the spare keys of every room. I took out the keys of her room and went again to her room. I slowly unlocked her door because if she was sleeping then I didn’t want to disturb her sleep. She already had so much for today. My heart skipped a beat when I found her bed empty and cold. Her purse and phone were on the bed but she was nowhere. I went towards the washroom and leaned over the door to hear any voice inside. I took a breath of relief when I heard the water running. She was taking her shower before going to bed. I smiled and then went out of the room silently.

I decided to prepare hot chocolate for her. It was the best remedy for sadness or that was what I thought. I prepared the hot chocolate for her as there was no maid at this time of the night. I put the mug on a tray and went upstairs again to her room. She should be out of the washroom by now. So, I decided to knock again. She didn’t answer and I felt something weird. If I was not wrong then we all went to our room more than two hours ago. In anticipation, I knocked her room a little loud this time.

“Mom… what’s wrong??? Why are you knocking at her door this time?” I heard Patrick’s sleepy voice and looked at him. He was looking annoyed but I didn’t give an ear to him and picked up the keys from the tray where I had put the key before and opened her door. “Mom… are you real?? I didn’t give a s**t to his rant because I was now panicking and anxiety was clouding my judgment. All I wanted was to see her out of the washroom.

I was startled to see still empty. I heard footsteps behind me. I put the tray on the bed in hurry and ran towards the washroom. I leaned on the door again and to my horror, the water was still running. “Mom… what are you doing?” Patrick scolded me but I knocked on the door. “Sara…… are you inside, honey?” I asked in a panicked tone. There was no voice and my hand started trembling due to anxiety.

I banged the door and Patrick yelled at me instantly. “Mom… are you out of your mind? Let her take her bath”, he scolded me and I glared at him this time. “If I am not wrong then she is inside the washroom for more than half an hour you stupid a**”, I yelled back and his eyes widened. I didn’t like to swear but he was now getting on my nerves now.

I banged the door again while calling her aloud. “What is going on here?” I heard Alexander’s voice. I ran towards the lock of the entry gate where I had left the keys. “She is inside the washroom for … for more than half an hour”, I heard Patrick telling Alexander. I took out the keys from the lock and ran to the washroom again. My hands were trembling so hard. “Mom… let me”, Patrick asked me and I refused while looking for the right key in the bunch of keys.

“Naomi… let me”, Alexander’s took the keys from my hand and I just put my hands on my mouth as tears were now streaming from my eyes. “Please… please be safe”, I mentally prayed to her. Alexander opened the door and I almost pushed them hard to clear my way inside. “Sara”, I yelled in panic when I saw her lying on the floor under the shower.