LOVING YOU BENEATH THE SURFACE

YOU WORKED FOR IT

All the negative feelings I was experiencing vanished as soon as he showed up like the hero he was. I never expected him to follow me since I said I wanted to be alone, but at the end of the day, I was glad he did.

We are not the type to have any big fights or arguments, even when we convey our dreams and views on things. Respecting our feelings and emotions were things we did unintentionally, it was just part of us. No matter what happened between us, we were always considerate of each other and mended up faster without holding any grudges.

Honestly, when I first got back with Chris, I was afraid. We had spent so much time apart that I was wondering if he had changed or if the way I had changed would affect him, but we were still the same. The spark we felt was still there and the assurance never dwindled. We were both careful around each other for the first few months, but the awkwardness slowly faded off and we were both free around each other.

He slowly removed the scarf from his neck and placed it around my neck. “Let’s not get cold” he said sweetly, and wrapped it nicely.

“But you will get cold” I pouted and he smiled and said “You can just keep me warm then” before placing his hand inside my jacket with my hand.

“Oh oh naughty you” I whispered with a sneaky smile as we turned to go home.

He suddenly stopped and removed his hand, to my surprise, before turning back and running into the convenience store. I was still processing what that display was when he came back with two cans of coffee.

“You wanted them” he said, stretching them over to me.

“I wanted them warm though” I whined and my lips folded in regret as my hand touched it and I saw that it was indeed warm. A soft and silly “Sorry” slipped out of my mouth but he just grabbed my hand and put it in my jacket with his as he led me home.

We were quietly sipping our coffee as we walked home when an ad suddenly popped up on one of the LED TVs on the way and it turned out to be an ad from my former company showcasing their newest collection.

In amusement, I ran towards the LED board and pointed to it happily. “Can you see it? This is from Liz! Oh wow! She’s doing so well, just as expected, and I am so proud. The designs are mind-blowing”. I sobbed happily as I made short jumps.

“She had a great mentor, so she has no choice but to do well”, Chris remarked proudly from behind, and watched me jump happily like a kid showered with Christmas presents.

“I never got to put our works on display like this but she did it! I am so proud of her! The babies are so beautiful too. She’s just the best out there”, I continued, and he chuckled at the word ‘baby’.

“One would think those are actual babies” he mocked, and I gave him a side eye. “Our clothes are our babies”, I snapped and he raised both hands in the air in surrender, “As you wish, ma’am”, making us both laugh.

“She’s really doing well” he remarked and clapped as he looked at the ad displayed in admiration.

I never for once doubted Liz when I nominated her for the position and she proved that she was more than worthy. She was doing well and her brand was well known in New Zealand. I saw her in newspapers and magazines from time to time and I was proud that she managed to pull through all the messes I created and made everything work for the better.

“I am so glad I left, I made the right decision and never regretted it” I declared firmly.

“You don’t want to see her? You are in New Zealand right now and it would be the perfect opportunity to catch up” he suggested, but I slightly shook my head.

“She’s doing well and that’s all that matters. I don’t want to face her yet. Maybe someday, when I have achieved all I wanted, I will pay her a visit”, I slowly replied, and he didn’t say anything else.

We stayed in New Zealand for a week before we went back to Las Vegas so we could also have some private time to ourselves. We went on several dates to catch up on the times we had lost. From the bars, clubs, game houses to the cinema, we did all that we had promised to do during the times we were apart and also spent some quality time at home reading, cooking and playing games together and, of course, having heart-blowing moments of s*x whenever we could.

I had the final team dinner with Antony’s company and left for good since my contract was up. Everyone expressed their sadness about letting me go, but I promised to keep in touch.

“I’m so glad you could achieve something when we worked together. Thank you for the memories”, Anthony told me with a voice filled with longing.

“Well.. I don’t know what I contributed, but I was the mending bridge between you and your love. That’s more than enough”, Emerson teased from behind and I covered my eyes shyly.

Ever since I rode his bicycle to meet Chris, he had been teasing me about how he was the bridge.

“Mr. Bridge Emerson, thank you for helping me out every time. Those late nights together, starting work from scratch and fixing over and over must have been exhausting but you never complained”, I stated.

“Well.. I enjoyed every bit of it” he said in return, and we had a friendly hug before I waved all of them goodbye as soon as Chris showed up to pick me up as scheduled.

The emptiness of what was next filled me up so much that I didn’t know the way forward. I knew what I wanted but I didn’t know how to go about it and the thought was eating me up by the day. He must have noticed it so he tried to strike up a conversation about it after dinner one day.

“Don’t you want to take Jean’s offer? She seems to be waiting for you” he said out of the blue, and I sighed.

It was as if I had been waiting for him to ask me about it and I couldn’t wait to pour my heart out to him immediately.

“I honestly want to take the offer, but babe….” I stopped for a while but he calmly looked at me and waited for me to continue without interrupting.

“I am scared that I might not do as well as she had expected. This is entirely different from my former company and the project I did with Anthony. I will be heading a big fashion company that even launches big fashion shows. Do you know how crazy that is?” I continued.

He shook his head, “I don’t know how crazy it is. Care to elaborate?”

A sigh left my throat at that remark. I didn’t know how to express myself that he would understand what I was trying to say.

“I mean, I will be involved in decision making, I will have the final say. I will have to think from the perspective of Jean and I will have to make everything as perfect as she has always done it. Jean is such a perfectionist and that is how she has developed her company till date. I am too scared, I will never be able to measure up to her”, I coughed out.

He went silent for some seconds and waited to see if I was done with my session before he took some water and turned to me.

“Never for once have I ever doubted your ability. Despite everything, you built up your own company and attracted investors. You left the company and worked on big projects that never for once flopped. Now you have gotten an offer from the biggest mentor you had in the best way you could ever have it. Do you think you did all this through luck? You thought you were just lucky? Hell no! You worked for it. You put in your blood, sweat and tears! That is how strong you are” he lectured.

Like a little kid, I listened with rapt attention so as not to miss out on any of his words. It felt like I was being scolded and reminded of many things at the same time, but it was honestly what I needed at that juncture.

He continued “If you keep doubting yourself, you will never be satisfied or achieve your dreams that you hold dear. It’s okay to make mistakes, you can just try again. Who cares if you didn’t get it right at the first trial? There’s a room for adjustment, so there’s no need to be hard on yourself.”

“But at the end of the day, the choice is yours. If you feel that it’s not meant for you, then I am ready to also support you in whatever you choose to do. That is a certain thing”, he added, and grabbed my hand gently, rubbing it.

I felt his words deep down my bones. He just gave me the needed reality check and I made my decision right there. There was no need for me to deceive myself anymore and I decided to have a little faith in myself, just like he had said.

“I am going for it. I will be the head of Jean’s company. I can do it”, I declared, and he smacked my ass.

“That’s my girl” he winked and drew me to himself for a kiss.

“How about some celebratory kinky moments?” he proposed, but I pulled myself off him and shook my head firmly “No!”

“I find it sexy when you act tough though” he said, biting his lips seductively before suddenly reaching for me and resuming the kissing section.

It’s not like I wasn’t enjoying it too, so why not make the night steamier?