Behind the Scenes

S: Breaking Ties

Three Months Ago

Sara Winters

I couldn't take it anymore. After having the continuous conversation with Jason over and over again, I waited until he left for work that morning, and then packed my things and headed over to Elizabeth's. I thought I was the only one hiding out but it seemed Kimberly was in hiding as well.

The house didn't feel crowded at the beginning, but after two days, I was missing my bed and my man. However, I don't think I can take it in that house with him anymore. I would've hid at my condo, but I didn't want him to find me as yet. Even though I told Lizzy and Jake to keep my where-abouts private, I knew he would find me eventually.

I was surprised when Lizzy had me and Kim in Jake's office with the door closed. I was perfectly fine pretending I was here to spend time with Zach, I mean who wouldn't come to see him.

"What's going on?" Lizzy asked as I gazed at the walls with no particular interest.

"Hello?" She bellowed loudly.

"What?" I asked, coming back to the room, sitting up in my chair.

"What's going on?" she asked again.

"Nothing." I shrugged.

"Okay, then you can go home." she raised her brows at me and folded her arms.

"Do you not like my company?" I wondered

She sighed as she rubbed my forehead. "You asked me to lie to Jason about where you were a few days ago. Are you hiding from him?"

"Maybe." I muttered.

"Why?" she almost shouted.

"Because... It's not going anywhere. I need time to think of whether I want to continue to wait." She was getting irritated and I needed to say what I was feeling out loud. I couldn't hold it in anymore.

"Did you talk to him?"

"Every single night." I exhaled. "I just want..." I stopped as I heard the sound of my voice. I was a broken record at this point. "I'm giving up." I admitted to myself. Never had I thought it would come to this, but the time was here to face reality.

The room fell quiet, Kimberly stopped pacing. No one was speaking after a while and I could tell Lizzy didn't know what to say. What could she say? It's been seven long years and I had to move on before my eggs were dried up and my body grew fragile.

"I don't know who to choose from." Kimberly tried to kill some of the awkwardness.

"From your men?" I chipped in, trying to start a conversation.

"Yeah."

"But we like Alex. He's cute and hard working. That's not something you're use to." I replied.

"Oh we're throwing shots now?" Kimberly's brow raised.

I watched Lizzy as she rolled her eyes, folded my arms, and sunk into her chair.

"Just an observation." I retorted.

"Oh we're making those now? Well here's an observation. Jason got tired of waiting for you to stop wiping Elizabeth's ass and started focusing on himself. You took too long and he got tired of waiting for you. Now you're here crying about it."

The room fell quiet. Lizzy covered my eyes with my fingers, unable to look up into anyone's face.

"Touché. Tou-f*****g-ché" I stood up and left the room, slamming the door behind me. She was right. My life was completely dismantled and turned on its head.

"Hey, Sara." Jake smiled as he unbuttoned his jacket.

"Hey, how was work?" I sighed with a smile.

"Hard." He nodded, looking down at me. "He misses you."

"He does?" I leaned against the wall for support. "everything is just... s**t right now." was all I could say.

"Yeah," he nodded. "Have you seen my wife?" he wondered.

"In your office with your sister."

"Perfect. I get nervous when those two are together." he shook his head before touching my shoulder and heading up the stairs.

I quickly made a small tray of snacks and then headed upstairs to where Zach was playing loudly. He was adorable. He had Jake's eyes and smile, but he looked similar to Lizzy. His wild hair was neatly braided back and his lips were rapped around the head of a toy.

I laughed. "What's going on here?"

"Aunty Cici, it won't come out." he continued to struggle to get the toy man out of his car.

"Are you sure he's suppose to come out?" I asked, taking a seat beside him.

"Last week he did, I promise." His eyes began to tear up and I reached to comfort him. He sat on my lap instinctively, handing the toy over to me.

"Let me see." I began to fiddle with the man, willing to do anything to please my Godson.

Lizzy entered the room and took a seat beside me, her mind seemingly somewhere else. "What are you doing?" she asked quietly.

"Removing this man like last week." I updated her.

"He can't be removed." she stated weakly. Zach turned to his mother as I handed back the toy to him. "Play with something else baby." she instructed.

"Okay, mama." he pouted.

"But he said last week -"

"He forced it out last week, breaking it. Jake had to run to the store to get glue to fix it." Lizzy waved off. I laughed when she shook her head in amusement, resting against her body.

I couldn't sleep. I couldn't stop thinking about Jason and the big deal he's been talking about lately. It was to be closed today and no matter how bad we were in this moment, I still thought about him and what makes him happy.

It was early in the morning and the house was quiet. When I finished using the washroom, I spotted a tall white boy walking down the stairs.

"Hello?"

"Oh hi." he flashed his pearly white considering he just got caught sneaking out.

"Do I know you?" I mean this wasn't my house but I should know everyone that came in and out.

"I'm sure we met once or twice before. I'm Shawn-Wayne. Most people call me Shawn. Umm, I was here to see Kimberly."

Oh, this was the boy Kim couldn't from. She had him over here last night?

"Oh alright. Nice seeing you again." I nodded before heading to the room to quickly change. I wanted to make sure Shawn didn't linger in the house so I went to check downstairs. I knew the boy came from money but you could never be too careful these days.

As I began to wonder what to make for breakfast, the front door opened. I thought Shawn came back for something he forgot, but froze when I saw Jason.

"Good morning." I greeted.

He said nothing, just simply entered into the house and closed the door.

"Where have you been?" He muttered when he was close to me. I turned around to face him, making sure the counter was in between us. "I've been here."

"So you just up and leave like that? With no warning or conversation?"

"We talk, or rather, I talk to you everyday. I'm not trying anymore."

He was silent. "Are you seeing someone?" he asked.

"What?"

"Are you seeing someone?" he yelled.

Lizzy appeared from the stairs but I kept my focus on Jason, knowing well that his temper was getting worse. If I kept calm, he would remain somewhat calm. I knew his temper well and I didn't want to provoke it.

"That's none of your business, Jason." I argued.

"If you're seeing someone else that is my business." He snapped

"Not anymore."

"So that's it? You're leaving me. Just like that?"

"It's not just like anything. I have talked to you about this countless times." I repeated once more.

His fingers ran through his hair in anger. "I'm sorry I'm not fast enough for you, Sara. After putting me off for so long, I'm sorry I'm trying to create something better for us."

"There you go again. You're always blaming me for this, but guess what? It's been years since I've been ready. I'm done waiting." I've made up my mind.

He slammed the counter with his fist and I jumped back in surprise. "Fine. Let's just get this over with. You want a ring? We'll go find one tomorrow. You want a baby? I have half an hour until work." He checked his watch for effect. I could tell he was patronizing me and I felt downgraded. He wasn't taking this as seriously as he should be, he never did.

"You're so f*****g insensitive. f**k you!" I spat. I stormed off to the washroom, tears running down my cheeks. I was done.