My Italian Heart

Chapter Thirty Eight

I was trying so hard to control myself, but she was killing me. There seemed to be so much I hadn't said and it only made me feel more guilty. So much had happened that she was unaware of, and then the business with Adam. I couldn't believe she had slept with the creep. It wasn't that I blamed her for it or even judged her for it, but even with everything else, I thought she was savvy enough to see through his puddle deep charms. I knew the sort and had been wary instantly, but I had put at least some of that feeling down to jealousy. Even if I had been confident enough to say something, she never would have believed anything I said about the bloke. Still, I couldn't help but blame myself for not doing something... more.

There I was trying to protect Cara as best I could from Bradford and in the process I had let Auroura down. While protecting one person from a predator, I had practically fed another woman to one. In my defense, it was because I had expected too much of Aurora. I had considered her more capable than Cara. On the surface, Aurora seemed so much stronger, but of course her strength was why it hadn't been worse than it was. Yes, he had spewed the details of their escapades to hurt me, but at least it was only me and he hadn't spread his filth any further. The fact that he had touched her in the office still made my skin crawl, but it could have been so much worse. Not that it made his actions any less revolting to me.

As she continued to rub my shoulders, my defenses were coming down bit by bit. I had been so careful to keep my hands to myself and let her take the lead when she came back from the shower. I didn't want to push her. Thinking it would be best for her to take some time. Apparently, she had other ideas. It hadn't started out with her trying to seduce me, she was just trying to be caring, but that was the problem with the pair of us. The slightest touch and fires were blazing.

With everything that had happened, I hadn't been able to tell her the truth. The conversation was too deep for it to take place in the office. I could have told her when I got back to the hotel room, but there was too big of a chance that she would lose her mind and storm off, leaving me with no way to get back to the vineyard. No, it was a conversation to be had on home turf. It wasn't just her I needed to speak to about it, but Emily too. It involved her just as much as it involved me. I might not have been sure how Aurora would react, but I knew exactly how Emily would react and it wouldn't be pretty.

I wasn't sure which would set her off first, me making sacrifices for Cara after what she had done, me letting Bradford manipulate me, or me sacrificing everything. Aurora wouldn't care about the money, I was certain of that and Emily would only care about it in principle. She had spent her whole life shunning my money and I doubt she planned to change her stance now. Even when I died and it all went to her, she wouldn't care less. I had absolutely no doubt that the money would mean nothing to her in the face of her grief. She would be so angry with me for doing anything for Cara and giving anything to Bradford.

That phone call had been hell. I had so wanted to head back to the hotel room and take solace in Aurora's presence. She would never know how much respite she gave me from the stress of the world. Instead, I had to call Cara, for Em's sake, even if Em wouldn't appreciate it. As far as she was concerned, Cara had made her own bed and it wasn't Em's place to pick up the pieces. The trouble was I felt just as guilty for letting Bradford get his claws into Cara as I did about Adam laying his grubby mitts on Aurora. The difference was that Aurora was so much stronger, courageous, and fierce than Cara was. With Aurora, she was a lioness fighting with everything she had, Cara was a zebra, waiting around with no idea what danger lurked around her.

Bradford had been blackmailing me for some time. First it was about Em. He had called me the morning of her afternoon tea with Cara and Amiee. They had already left for the venue and I was in the office working. The sly coward had called in from home instead of coming in. Telling me that if I didn't hand over my shares in the business then he would take it out on Emily. That he knew where she was. I told him no. I didn't think for a second that Cara would let him near Emily after what I had told her had happened in the office. There was no doubt in my mind that she was safe there with her mother.

Then Emily had called me to go and collect her. I realised as soon as the phone rang how wrong I was. Cara was no longer capable of fighting enough even for her own daughter. It seemed impossible to me. I couldn't understand how she wouldn't go as far as laying her life on the line for our daughter. It was incomprehensible. Emily told me afterwards that she had said enough to allow them to get away from Bradford, but it never should have gotten that far. She never should have even told him she was seeing Emily.

Emily had been disappointed about the things Cara had said about Amiee and it was certainly out of character. Except, I was sure Emily had read the situation wrong. I thought that Cara knew Bradford was planning to turn up and that she felt unable to stop him confronting Emily in that way. When Em had turned up with Amiee, Cara had done and said what she needed to in order to get Em to storm out. She was her mother, she knew exactly which buttons to push. I knew Cara well enough to know she would never have said the things she said about Amiee and certainly not in a public setting. She was raised with impeccable manners and clung to them like a lifeline her entire life. It wasn't just out of character, it was damn right alien.

No, I was certain. She had seen Amiee as an innocent who couldn't protect herself and stepped in. Maybe she thought Emily was brave enough to face down Bradford, she was certainly a lot more like Aurora than Cara. She wasn't always that lioness, but the spirit lived within her. Being let out when it was needed, normally to protect those who needed someone to protect them. That was one of the reasons I was so surprised by her stance when it came to Cara.

Aurora, suddenly locked lips with mine, hungry and intense. It was enough to dart my brain back to the present along with sending it reeling from the sparks that flew between us. I knew she was trying to force me to be in the moment. I was also pretty certain she knew something was wrong, but she seemed to be accrediting it to my run in with Adam. Which in truth was only a minor part of the problem I was facing. Mainly because I knew Emily was right, Aurora was capable of handling anything. It just reminded me how much I had failed already.

After the afternoon tea, I had barely blinked and Emily was heading out of the country. I had thought that was the end of it and fully intended to sell my shares in the business long before I met Aurora. She had only changed where I wanted to end up after it was all done with. Except, Bradford, the piece of filth that he was, didn't want to pay for the shares. Why would he do something above board when he had the opportunity to get one over on someone? I used to admire his tenacity, but that was before I realized how crooked he had become. It just gave me even more reason to be free from him.

I couldn't believe he had sunk so low, but the phone call in the hotel room put paid to that. That was the moment I lost any hope of my friend ever being the man I knew again. I had listened intently to every word he had uttered. Barely daring to respond, with Aurora watching me from the balcony. I should have told her straight away what he was trying to do. Not even trying, but succeeding. He had told me how he would make Cara pay for my unwillingness to yield to him. Nonchalantly discussing his options as if she was nothing. The idea of him breaking a bone for every share I owned particularly stuck in my mind.

He had insisted on me dealing with it immediately, so I had no choice but to find a way of emailing my solicitor all the details, although he had cautioned me about going through with it. Begging me to see that it wouldn't help Cora be safe. I knew he was right, but what could I do? My hands were tied. I couldn't let her blood be on my hands. As a parting shot on the phone, Bradford had made it clear that he had already started taking his moneys worth out on Cora.

I rang her as soon as I had done the paperwork, pretending to just be checking in. The conversation never steered remotely towards Bradford. Instead, as she asked about Emily, I could hear the struggle in her voice, the slight wheeze in her breathing. If I had to have guessed, I would have guessed he had broken at least one rib if not more. It was enough for me to believe he was fully intent on harming her, not that I wasn't already convinced.

It killed me hearing her like that. It took everything I had not to be sick at the thought of her there with cracked ribs and no one to turn to. Before we put the phone down, I told her that she should come over and visit. That Emily was so happy here and blooming into the most amazing young woman and that she needed to see it for herself. It was all true, but I was certain it would never happen. I felt so helpless. There was no easy way to even tell Aurora, but until I did, I felt like I was betraying her. That was the reason I had been so keen not to tell anyone about our relationship. If it somehow got back to Bradford, I was worried he would pile the pressure on more, or think he had already lost. Either way, it would mean Cora was in more danger.

I had no choice but to keep Aurora and myself a secret. Expect I had done a rather poor job of it. I knew I now had to find a way to convince Emily that she was wrong about Aurora and me. It was the only option if I wanted to keep Cora safe. The more I considered my options, the more I knew I couldn't tell Emily or Auroua about Bradford's threats until after the deal was done. Aurora was too pure to keep that sort of secret, it would literally burst right out of her and if Emily found out before the contracts were signed, she would stop me at all costs. It was safer for everyone if I continued to keep it to myself. I kept telling myself it was better to ask for forgiveness than permission. It was a sentiment my father had believed in and my mother had hated. Time would tell which one of them was right.