The Lost Female Alpha

Just A Normal Day

When I opened my eyes the room was still dark so I knew it must be early. I picked up my phone from the bedside table and looked at the screen. It was 5 am meaning there were still two hours before I needed to set off for college.

I tried to close my eyes and get some more rest but the memories from my dream were still too painful. There was no way that I was going to be able to get back to sleep again so I may as well get up. I reluctantly sat up and spent a few minutes mindlessly scrolling through social media before finally dragging myself out of bed.

I took a quick shower and got changed into some black skinny jeans with a studded belt, a black band t-shirt and my leather jacket. The way I dressed probably wasn’t the best if I wanted to hide myself or fit in with the other werewolves in my pack but I stopped caring about things like that a long time ago.

I spent a lot of time and effort trying to hide anything that might make me stand out when I first moved here. Dressing and acting like the popular kids in the hope that they would accept me. I was so desperate to fit in and make friends that I almost forgot who I really was but it didn’t matter. No matter how hard I tried they still treated me like an outcast.

I even went through a stage of trying to fade into the background by wearing huge baggy clothes to hide my athletic body shape and slouching so that my height was less noticeable. It didn’t help me, if anything that seemed to make the rest of the pack bully me more.

That was when I came to the realisation that I wasn’t the problem. There was nothing that I could do that would make them like me so I should stop living my life on their terms. From that day on I have dressed exactly how I wanted to without caring what they thought of me.

I would finish my look with dark makeup and jewellery later, but first I needed breakfast. I didn’t often have the opportunity to eat lunch so I usually tried to make my breakfasts count.

Our house was a lot smaller than the mansion I was born in but it was bigger than the cosy three-bedroom cottage that we had all lived in for ten years. Downstairs there was a comfortable living room, a large kitchen with a large dining table and a formal dining room which Christian used as his office most of the time. Upstairs there were three large double bedrooms and two bathrooms. It may not have been the most lavish home but it was comfortable and I loved it here almost as much as I loved cooking in this kitchen.

“Oh my god. Diana, this smells amazing.” Ryker said, causing my heart to skip a beat.

I may have grown up with Ryker and been living with him for most of our lives but we were not related in any way. That was good given the way I was starting to feel about him. Even though I haven’t admitted it to anyone, over the last couple of years I had developed a huge crush on him. I couldn’t help it, he was 6ft 3 with a muscular build, long blond hair, blue eyes and the kind of face that could break hearts with a single smile.

What makes it worse is that I know he feels the same way about me. If our situation was different I would have asked him on a date in a heartbeat but our current living arrangement would make any kind of relationship awkward. I hoped that once I turned nineteen my wolf would recognise him as our mate and we could be together without feeling guilty. Until then I guess we would have to settle for silently pining for each other.

“I know I do but what about the food?” I joked.

“That smells almost as tasty as you do.” He said, there was a slight husky growl in his voice. It made me wish I hadn’t started flirting with him now, we weren’t meant to be flirting with each other. Heck, we weren’t even meant to acknowledge our feelings for each other.

He walked towards me, before pouring himself a cup of coffee and putting some bread in the toaster. I was so busy focusing on the eggs that I didn’t notice how close Ryker was until he started to turn the bacon in the pan right next to me.

Now that I was aware of just how close he was, it was the only thing I could think about. I could feel the heat coming off of his body, if I took one step to the side then my whole body would have been pressed up against his. I could lean in towards him slightly and kiss him, then I would know if he tastes as good as he smells.

This was bad, I needed to put some distance between us before I did something I would later regret. Ryker took two plates out of the cupboard next to me, as he did so I could feel his breath on me and I could see the smile crossing his face out of the corner of my eye. He knew exactly what he was doing to me and he was enjoying every second of it. Asshole.

I backed away from him slowly and walked over to the jug of coffee that had been brewing on the worktop on the other side of the room. I picked my favourite mug out of the cupboard and poured myself some coffee. The moment the coffee hit my nostrils it was as though my body suddenly started to come back alive. I quietly moaned although I clearly wasn’t quiet enough to escape Ryker’s notice. His eyes shot in my direction straight away and there was heat in them that wasn’t there a few seconds ago. I could feel my cheeks heating up. I didn’t normally get embarrassed around men I was interested in but the situation with Ryker wasn’t exactly typical.

I walked over to the kitchen table and sat down so that he wouldn’t be able to see how much he was affecting me. I really hoped that he wouldn’t notice even though I knew the chances of that were slim. There were only a few things you could guarantee in life: death, taxes and that Ryker would take every opportunity to capitalise on my weakness.

“I don’t know how you can drink black coffee,” Ryker commented as he started to put our breakfast onto plates.

“It matches my soul,” I joked.

Ryker was laughing as he set the plate in front of me. I hoped my dark humour would be enough to break the tension between us and we could eat breakfast together like two normal people who weren’t attracted to each other in any way.

I tried to focus all my energy on the plate of food in front of me, something that I normally had no problem with. Today however, I kept finding myself glancing in Ryker’s direction. I even caught him doing the same thing more than once. The tension between us was so strong that I could hardly bear being in the same room as him. All I could think about was how much I wanted to kiss him.

Things weren’t usually this bad between us. A few weeks ago things were almost normal but then I broke up with my girlfriend Mary-Anne. Ever since then our feelings for each other have been growing stronger. It was starting to get to the point where neither of us could hide how we felt. I was so glad that my birthday was only a couple of days away.

I saw Ryker glance my way out of the corner of my eye. He looked me up and down while nibbling on his bottom lip. That was when I knew I needed to get away from him immediately. I stood up from the table and started walking towards the door.

“Where do you think you’re going?” He asked, his voice was huskier than normal causing me to turn around to look at him. He was still sitting at the table but he had turned his whole body so he could look at me.

“Just going to put some make-up on before college.”

I was trying to sound nonchalant but I missed. My voice was a few octaves higher than it should be and my breathing and heart rate were a dead giveaway of the effect he was having on me.

“Someone as beautiful as you doesn’t need make-up but I could think of something else we could do with the next half an hour instead.”

He stood up and started walking towards me, the look in his eyes was so intense that it made my heart skip a beat. I licked my lips. It wasn’t intentional but it was probably the worst thing I could have done if I wanted to make him think I wasn’t interested in him because I heard his heart rate instantly accelerate.

He took a step closer to me and raised his hand to touch me. His fingers were millimetres away from my cheek when I heard a door open upstairs. He looked up towards the noise so I took the chance to slip away before he could distract me again. I have never run upstairs even half as quickly as I did at that moment.