Letters Full of Sunshine ✓

Day 03: Where heights is involved

Day three.

Where heights is involved. 

March 8.

This is the third sunflower.

    I am having a hard time realizing as to what the f**k is currently happening at this very second. Am I seeing things, is that what is happening? For I already have the sunflower in my hands. My eyes are pierced on the note that I was holding. I diverted my gaze at the sunflower that I'm holding - the third sunflower. Yes, I don't seem to be seeing things for I already have the thing in my hands. 

    I already have the third sunflower, and it's like 11 in the freaking morning. So this is it? No more letter attached to this thing to give me clues to what will happen? No surprises? Just, third sunflower?

    I looked at the sunflower and almost immediately, my mood instantly changed. I want to be happy because of that thought, but I can't help but feel utterly incomplete. This wasn't the usual thing that would happen whenever he would prepare something for me so I seemed to be nothing but weirded out. I looked around and saw a different surrounding. 

    Oh, that's right. 

    I'm still in the mini van that they seemed to have lurking around in this island. 

    We are still on this island since we didn't get a chance to go home last night, but I wasn't actually complaining. Sleeping here was beyond amazing, so there were no rejections when Shawn asked if we could stay for the night. 

    I enjoyed it. 

    The real reason why an mini van is installed here is for us to sleep into. And uh, yeah, by 'us', I mean Eyre and I. Shawn and that guy - I don't know his name okay - seemed to have build a tent outside and that is where they spend the night. 

    I immediately sat up when I heard Eyre screamed.

    Then a sigh escape my lips the minute that I heard her laughter. They were just playing around and her screams are nothing but squeals of happiness. I just yawned and proceed in the bathroom that's installed here. To all that they have managed to make me see, this is probably one of the things that made me realize as to just how rich they really are. 

    The installed bathroom have everything that you would think it's a small hotel. Frankly, it's extremely how one would feel it. Eyre and I slept like a f*****g log last night as this is probably the most comfortable bed that was ever invented. 

    I'm even wearing Eyre's new silk pajamas - one that seems like a gift from the gods to the texture of the fabric.

    If you would ask me how she managed to bring these many clothes, I don't know the answer. Maybe she expected the night sleep in or she's just ready about almost everything. I wouldn't even be surprised if she told me that they have an underground house somewhere. I took a bath, brush my teeth and tied my hair into a bun. 

    Cautiously opening the door of the mini bus, I frowned upon feeling the sun to blast through my eyes. The place was beautiful when the night sky engulfs it and nothing but fairly lights surrounds the place. However, I am someone who appreciates the view of the nature.

    Slightly covering my eyes, I finally caught a glimpse of Eyre and the guy that she was with. Both of them were now on the beach, playing around like kids - which of course, is what they are. Eyre would usually say that she's a college student but we don't see her as that.

    She was a baby - nothing else. 

    Looking around the place, a frown formed on my face as soon as I noticed that Shawn isn't around here.

    Where even is he?

    I smiled as I felt the sun's ray in my skin. 

    I missed this. 

    I miss how the sun felt against my skin. Our town is basically afraid by the whole idea of sun that most of the days, it just shield us out of the sun. Fogs were natural in the place and coldness is just a normal thing for us - that's why the town has tons of coffee shop for people to enjoy. We were lucky enough to have adequate enough of regulars. 

    Even the summer weather isn't an exception to our town, that is for sure. We can wear long sleeves during the summer and still wouldn't sweat. That's how our town runs. 

    I'm also not really used with going out in such places. Home and the coffee house has always been my only destination. I sighed by the thought. I suddenly missed the whole idea of coffee. There is not a single evidence of coffee in this place which seemed natural since they all wasn't a fan of coffees. 

    I've been noted that both Eyre and Shawn hate the coffee itself - but Eyre's trying her best to like it. She's such a sweet peach.

    "Good morning, Tami!" Eyre appeared on my side, flashing a sweet smile at my direction, "Have you seen your sunflower? Did it made you smile? Hihi, are you ready to go home?"

    "This fast?"

    She looked at me in confusion as the disappointed laced on my tone. I just fake a cough as she laughed at me. This kid is just exactly like her brother! My eyes moved to the guy who appeared on her side. While he was moving closer to us, he was pulling his hair back, a thing that perfectly worked because I think that they just went for a swim. 

    The guy just bowed at me and I bowed back.

    Eyre chuckled at my reaction, "Kidding! We're not going home. We're going somewhere fun!"

    I just nodded as we walked in the island. They were leading me to the place that seemed to be where Shawn even is. Have he been preparing something while I was asleep? I would hope not. He shouldn't really put everything for whatever he has planned. 

    As I trail behind the two, I made sure to give them the space that they needed. I looked at the beach as I shook my head. Wow, I already felt alone without him by my side.

    I sighed as thoughts continue to linger in my head, again. Last night was a blast. We had fun by the fire, we talked a lot and we danced again and again. Something about Eyre makes you just feel like yourself; it's like he know every way to make me smile. He's perfect. 

    Too perfect, actually.

    We ride a very normal looking boat. It's like a normal island hopping boat-but I know that we ain't doing some island hopping. I think we're just going to the back side of this island. I felt literally empty. This is not a good sign. I want to stay away from Shawn after going back home, but I agreed with this thirty days sunflowers thing.

    Again. 

    Again with that.

    What is he doing to me?

    "Kookie, If I told you to jump, would you jump?"

    I looked at Eyre who is just basically looking at the water. The water is so clear that you can see that we're literally far from the seabed. The guy whose name was actually 'Kookie' just looked at the water and his eyes grew wide as he saw how deep that water is. I held my mouth as my laughter badly wants to escape. That was funny. He just nodded as if calculating the feet and he sighed.

    "You jump, I jump."

    Aww! They're so cute. 

    We stopped at the back side of the island and we continued to walk towards some path. I'm still looking around; carefully looking for Shawn. He must be here somewhere now, right? He can't just leave us alone. He can't just leave me here to babysit these kids! I laughed at that thought. I'm being insane.

    I felt a warm arm in my shoulder which made me look at my right side where I am welcomed by a smiling form of Shawn. I flash a contented smile which made him chuckle in response. He collide our foreheads together and I felt his grin widen as I close my eyes. He kissed the top of my head before we start to walk towards the path.

    "Did you have a good sleep?"

    I smiled, "Yes, very. Thank you."

    He looked at me as he pulls me closer. I don't know where we're going but a part of me is pleased that we're doing something together. The whole island is all in all breathtaking even when the sun is out. The forest is very lively as the sun shines towards them. I smiled as I felt some of ray of the sun in my face, completely loving the warm feeling inside my body.

    "You look very happy."

    "That's because I am," I responded almost immediately before opening my eyes to look around us, "So, where are we going?"

    "You'll see," he grinned at me before taking a look at forward where Eyre and Kookie is just softly talking to one another, smiles were plastered into their faces. He shot me a very apologetic look, "Sorry about this. It should be just the two of us, but I can't leave her behind."

    "I don't mind. Besides, I'm always fond of Eyre's presence."

    He shot me a smile and we stop at a cliff. Seriously, he must have some sort of plan to kill me. What part of 'I'm afraid of heights' doesn't he even get? I glare at him, simply telling him that I'm not happy with this. He just smiled and dragged me even close. I'm appalled!

    Eyre carefully explained what we're supposed to do and I gulped as I squeeze Shawn's hand-hard. I heard him wince in pain but I just shot him a dangerous look in which he just chuckled in response. We're supposed to jump from this cliff just to get into that water. I mean for the love of-ugh!

    "Nope," I mumbled, even popping the 'p' word.

    "Tami, I'm here. You don't have to be afraid."

    "What are you talking about!? I have all the reason to be afraid! We're jumping from who knows how high -"

    "50 feet," Kookie carefully announced as he push his hair back.

    Eyre grumbled as she shook her head, her voice were laced with nothing but pure sarcasm, "Wow, thanks for actually helping Kookie. You have been a great help that I'm tempted to throw you in the cliff."

    "What? I lessen the feet, it's actually much higher than 50. I'm helping."

    "Well you just revealed your big secret, stupid!" Eyre sighed as she shook her head in complete disappointment. Kookie, however, just seems unfazed as he look towards the surrounding.

    I gasped as I take a good look at Shawn, "More than 50 feet!? You're crazy! I'm not jumping in this death contraption!"

    "We'll jump together, okay? Don't be afraid."

    I can't stop being afraid. This is too high. The water is too deep. I'm not that tall. I can't breathe, oh my gods. I held Shawn's wrist as I felt the wind kissing my face. It was refreshing, mind you. But if you're going jump from a cliff and you're acrophobic, nothing is quite refreshing in your mind. I held my arms together, praying that after this extreme jump, I can still be alive. Shawn laughed at my side as he put his arms on my shoulder. I just rolled my eyes. Sadist.

    "Don't be afraid, Tami."

    "I can't help it! I'm acrophobic, Shawn!"

    "And all this time, I thought that you're Tami," he simply mouthed and I glared at him, earning a chuckle in response. He smiled at me before messing my hair, "Breathe, love."

    How can I f*****g breathe when you just call me love?! This guy just wouldn't stop killing me. Damn it, he'll be the death of me. I just sighed before closed my eyes. I'm too afraid. Please calm me down, just please. I felt his breath in my ears. I froze. What the hell is he doing now?! I just shrugged it off as I continue to calm myself.

    "Love," he whispered huskily. Damn it! "Breathe, okay?"

    I pushed him away and he laughed way out loud. This guy just wouldn't stop freaking me out. He help his stomach as he continue to laugh like a freaking dying hyena- but I am just kidding since his laugh is freaking adorable. I crossed my arms and rolled my eyes. He stopped laughing as he hold my shoulders but something about his face can say it all-he still find it funny. And I was right. He still did. He laughed again which made me lose it.

    "Shawn! You're not helping!"

    "Sorry, sorry," he stood straight as he hold my shoulders, "You just need to breath, Tami. I'm here, I won't let go of you. I'm here, I'm always here just for you."

    I know. I know that you are - you're proving it almost everyday, ever since you met me. But I can't just - ugh. I looked at the water below and I felt like crying. Shawn held my hand as he swayed our body, smiling in front of me. I know what he's doing, he's calming me - but this can't calm my feels, Shawn. He hugged me as he was still swaying our bodies together.

    "Shawn, isn't this painful?"

     "No, it isn't. I wouldn't let you try it if it is, Tami."

    "I'm scared."

    "I know, I know. But rest assured. This is fun, Tami."

    "I wouldn't get hurt?"

    "Tami, I wouldn't let you to get hurt. Your hair, your face, your body, your soul, your breath, everything about you, right now, is mine. If you got hurt, I'll get hurt too. Please remember that."

    This is too much. I can't breathe with this guy saying these kind of words. How can he manage to say those words without hesitating, without being such a dork? How can he say those words just straight forward? He's really something.

    "Tami, are you ready?"

    "No, never. Nope nope nope."

    "Tami. Breathe."

    I just sighed and let him go. He held my hand and we look straight. I almost cried. I can't do this. No. What am I thinking? I can't do this. No. I can't do this. Shawn squeezed my hand and I looked at him and I saw him gasped at my reaction. I think he saw how terrified I felt because his face soften. He sighed and hugged me tight. I suddenly felt like crying. I think he really want to try this thing and I'm being such a diva.

    "It's okay, Tami. We can always walk down. I won't force you."

    "I'm sorry, Shawn."

    "Tami, you're more important than this."

    We walked down while his left arms is hugging me and I was close to his body. I'm pleased with this. Eyre and Kookie jumped the cliff without much of a difficulty - I suppose. I think they both enjoyed it. Shawn was calming me down as we went down; telling me that it's okay, that he doesn't mind. That just made me more guilty. I think he really want to try that with me. Sorry, Shawn. Anything.... just not heights.

    "Do you want to go home now, Tami?"

     "I don't mind."

    We arrived in the beach and I smiled. 

    This is more I like it. 

    I ran towards the beach as Shawn trailed behind me, chuckling at how I seemed like someone who looked like a kid. The water touched my waist and I smiled as I felt the cold water. The water is so refreshing. I laughed and I think Shawn just smiled at my reaction. 

    I looked at him before splashing some water on him. He was taken aback; but then he smiled and splashed some water on me. We just played on the water. We chase each other, laughed at each other and splash some water on each other. At least, this can make him happy.

    At exactly 5 pm, we left the island. The helicopter came and I slept the whole helicopter ride. Yes, because I am still afraid of heights, I slept at Shawn's shoulder while he sang me some lullaby. He's such a catch. We arrived in my doorstep at exactly 7 pm. 

    Almost every girl that's walking inside the apartment was glaring me at but I don't have the energy to pretend that I have time to actually pay any attention to them. Besides, Shawn's eyes were all pierced into me. Heh. I smiled at Shawn who is now outside my doorstep. He doesn't want to enter my apartment, telling me to just rest because he knew that I was tired-and I was. Very, actually.

    "Good night, Tami."

    I smiled and squeezed his hand, "Good night, Shawn!"

    He entered the elevator and I smiled as I enter my bedroom. I noticed a piece of paper in my bed side table. His letter! I ran into it and sat on my bed.

✉

3rd.

I'm still here, it's the 6th day; and still, nothing. A part of me hated to be with her, but I just want to see her. For one last time. I won't be seeing her soon- I just want to see her for the last time. But yet, none. I was disappointed. I didn't see her smiles. I didn't hear her laugh. I didn't hear her voice. I didn't saw her dance. Nothing.

"Hey! What are you still doing here!"

....and once again, she proved me wrong. She's in my front, smiling as she was holding something in her hands. She handed it to me before flashing that sweet smile. I will never forget that smile.

Because that smile, gave me the strength that I needed.

/end.

✉