Illegally Yours |+18|

9. I owe it to David.

Aaron.

"I want you to fire your secretary," I tell Evan as soon as he walks into his office.

He stops what he's doing on his computer to look me in the eye, looking genuinely confused by my command.

Is he serious, man?

"What has she done to receive your fury, cowboy?"

"Isn't ridiculing Bess the way she did in front of new clients enough?"

"Oh, that's it." A smirk forms on his lips as he leans back in his seat, hands behind his head. “Should I really fire her? Because, man, she is a kitten in bed and I enjoyed it for a very short time, can't you give me more days?

"Are you serious, Evan?" I ask in disbelief. " You know the rule about not..."

“Getting involved with company employees” ends for me in a boring tone. "But you also know that I don't stick to the rules."

I snort because arguing with him is really impossible.

“Just fire her” I growled in his direction and walked back to the door, ready to leave.

“Wait, Aaron! I have something to tell you."

I turn around, waiting for him to blurt out what he wants from me.

"Stunningly beautiful eyes and your laugh the favorite sound in the world?" He whistles some silly tune that makes me clench my hands into fists. "Wow, the girl really has a thing for you."

I control myself not to hit him, because he's really pissing me off.

Bess's feelings are not something to make fun of, not by me, or by anyone. Also, what she wrote was adorable. In my life I thought I would awaken feelings in someone as pure and innocent as the ones I awaken in her. And I would never make fun of it, on the contrary, I am probably flattered.

"Evan" I walk over to him and force my hands on his desk, staring at him. "Some mockery of Bess comes out of your mouth again, and I swear to God I'll break your face."

He raises his hands in surrender.

He knows I'm not playing.

“Hey, it's okay, I don't mean to make fun of you” Suddenly, he gets really serious. "I saw it coming, you know?"

I tilt my head, not understanding what he means.

"I do not know what are you talking about".

“Come on, Aaron”. He say. “You found this girl on the street and you are giving her everything she has never received from anyone. You give her stability, support, kindness, and affection. You give her everything for nothing. It is obvious that she is going to see you as her idol, as her hero. Her having this fascination with you is totally predictable. In the end, she is still a girl who found her protector, her savior… And I am worried.”

"I would never hurt her," I say honestly.

"I know," he says immediately. “It's not her I'm worried about, it's you”.

I roll my eyes because he is being totally absurd.

"My God, Evan, what nonsense are you saying?"

“When was the last time you cared as much about a girl as you do about her?”

“My sister” I remind her. “I also worry about my mother and my grandmother. I even care about Christina!”

He rolls his eyes in exasperation when really the exasperated one should be me.

I don't understand where he wants to go with this.

And since when is Evan a psychologist?

By God, soon I will see the cows barking like dogs.

"I'm talking about you liking the girl, asshole!" He says bluntly. “You're attracted to her and Christ Aaron, I get her having this quick crush on you! But you for her?!”

"I don't like Bess," I muttered under my breath.

And although I feel like I've known her all my life, it really isn't. Three days ago she came into my life. Of course I don't like her, I can't like her. She's not even legal to be mine.

"Aaron, I've known you all my life," Evan reminds me. “I've seen you go from romp to romp, I've even seen you have one or another serious relationship, but with none of them have I seen you be as protective as you are with Bess. And you only have days to meet her!”

“She is helpless, vulnerable, a child even more in mind than in body! Of course I want to protect her, Evan!”

Why can't he understand it?

I'm sure he would have done the same in my place.

"You haven't been near a woman since Violet!" He yells, getting to his feet and facing me. “For the last five years you have kept yourself out of reach of any woman and we all know it is because you are waiting for her to come back!

I take a step back, letting myself fall onto the chair.

That is a topic that Evan and I rarely, if ever, touch on.

The pain remains the same, it has not diminished despite the years.

And I know Evan feels the same way too.

“I owe it to David,” I mutter with the damn lump in my throat.

“No, you don't owe him and you know it. Just as you also know that Violet made the right decision to leave.”

I'm not going to argue about it.

Violet is a subject that I am not willing to discuss with anyone.

"At what point did this conversation go from Bess to Violet?" I ask, because I really don't know what the hell he wants me to understand. “Be clear, Evan. Get to the f*****g point.”

He nods repeatedly, looking at me with complete seriousness.

“I'm talking about, if you're accepting Bess even over that f*****g pointless promise you made, it's because she's digging deep into you. And I don't want you to get hurt, Aaron!" I look at him in silence, gradually understanding where he wants to go. “Bess is going to give you anything you ask for, no question. She is so grateful to you, to the point that I'm sure she has you at an altar. She will do everything for you, no matter what it is. But what's going to happen to you when she passes her thanks on to you? When she knows more life, more boys and stops being a girl in love with her hero? When that happens, where are you, Aaron?”

I swallow hard, understanding his point.

But there is something that he does not have in mind.

I didn't bring Bess with me to get something from her. I did it selflessly. I knew from the start that, in due course, I must let her go. And when she thinks she doesn't need me anymore, then I'll step aside.

No drama, no pain, no suffering. Because she is just a girl that I want to protect because of all the unfortunate luck that she befell.

That is all.

"I'm not going to fall in love with Bess, if that's what you think" I stand up, tired of this topic. “When I made that promise, I knew my love life was over. And in case you didn't notice, Bess is a girl. And as you implied, she's not emotionally stable and I'm not going to take advantage of that."

He reaches across her desk and warmly grabs my shoulder, giving it a hard squeeze.

"Just be careful, I don't want you to suffer."

I nod without saying anything else.

I free myself from her grasp, however, I stop again at the door when I hear his voice again: “And regarding the secretary, give me a few more days, okay? I think I deserve a little more easy sex.”

I shake my head, a small smile of relief on my lips as he's back to his usual carefree Evan.

The responsible role was David's, not he.

"Do what you want, but stay away from Bess."

"As you command, my king."

I open the door as a small laugh escapes my mouth. However, that laugh stops when I see Bess and Carmencita walking this way.

"Aaron!" Bess speeds up the steps that separate us and hurries over to me.

I smile at her when she smiles at me, because really, it's impossible not to when she smiles so happily at me.

And I like to think that her excitement at seeing me is due to everything Evan told me. Actually, it sounds very coherent, but it doesn't feel like that. The sweetness in her actions seems to come from instinct, not thanks. Only believing Evan's version is safer for me, so I stick with it.

"Pretty, what are you doing here?"

“I came to thank Evan,” she says, rising from her feet to look over my shoulder into his office. "Carmen told me that he was unoccupied and could attend me."

Carmen smiles at me from behind Bess and I motion to her to let her know I can handle this, so she quietly walks away from us.

Evan's secretary looks at us with interest from her desk, a few steps away from us. I give her a warning look to mind her own business and she quickly complies.

I look back at Bess and when I'm about to tell her that Evan can't take care of her, the jerk opens the door wide behind me, popping in when he's not supposed to.

"Bess!" There's too much enthusiasm in his voice, and I realize he just wants to screw me. "Come in, come in, to what do I owe the honor of you showing up here?"

Bess walks past me and into the office, so, seeing no other choice, I follow her silently. As Evan closes the door behind him, Bess throws herself into a big hug.

“I am so grateful for what you have done for me!” She says excitedly, hugging him tightly.

Evan goes blank, not knowing how to react.

And if I didn't feel this overwhelming urge to push him away from Bess, I'd be making fun of the look on his face.

Finally, when he reacts, he pats her back awkwardly.

Once, twice, three times and he stops when he meets my glare.

Bess pulls away to look at him with that huge grin of hers, looking so grateful to him.

Damn.

"Don't thank me for anything, girl" the bastard gives her his flirtatious smile and I swear I don't hit him just because I know he does it to provoke me. "I am delighted to have you working in my company."

I coughed on purpose, drawing his attention.

Oh, I feel so damn lucky to be noticed.

"Aaron is an excellent employee," he continues, pissing me off even more. "He's worked for me for years and takes my orders perfectly...By the way, Cooper, can I have a glass of water?" He prompts me, his eyes sparkling with amusement.

"Ask the secretary," I spit maybe too sharply because Bess looks at me in amazement.

But I'm the boss, not him!

"I can bring you the glass of water..."

"He's thirsty now," I interrupt Bess's words. "Right, Evan?"

I look at him as hard as I can, daring him to say otherwise.

"Yes, of course," he says, walking back to his desk to sit down.

That's right, put a desk between us, smart boy.

“Bess and I are leaving...” I stop my words when my phone rings inside my pants pocket. When I take it out, I read that it is a message from my grandmother.

Grandma: I'll wait for you at my house tonight, Aaron Cooper.

Shit, he used my full name.

If I don't go, She'll probably have knocking on my door in the middle of the night and trust me, that wouldn't be nice. Last time she woke up halfway up the building.

Also, she can't see Bess.

“My grandma wants to see me tonight” I say out loud as I give her a quick reply back telling her I'm on my way. "Evan, can you take Bess to my apartment?"

Bess's slight wince doesn't go unnoticed, and something inside me warms at the action.

She wants me, not him.

Where is your thanks, damn Evan?

"I'll take her" he agrees.

"First take her to get her ID picture taken and if you can call your sister to stay with Bess tonight, do so."

"Aren't you going to sleep?" Bess asks, looking at me with a hint of disappointment in her brown eyes.

"Yes, but it may take me a while."

She nods immediately, however there is still some disappointment there.

“My sister will be delighted” Evan tells me. "She hasn't stopped talking about Bess at any time, so she will be very happy to see her again."

Bess grins all her teeth at him, looking so happy someone wants to see her.

Jesus, did she grow up with such a lack of affection?

"Okay, call her."

Talking to someone her age can help Bess. Christina can be a support. A friend to whom she can confide things that she may be embarrassed to say to me.

"See you at home, pretty" I tell her before walking towards the door.

It's hard for me not to walk over and say goodbye to her the way I want, but Evan's words keep echoing in my head and I really don't want to take advantage of her.

And somehow, nurturing his feelings for me feels like I'm doing exactly that.

Just before I can open the door, I hear her quick footsteps behind me and then her skinny arms wrap around my torso from behind, her face burying into my back as she says, "I'll wait up for you."

I sigh with my eyes closed, urgently needing to get away from her.

It's. So. Damn. Hard.

I take her hands that rest intertwined on my chest and bring them to my lips, placing a quick kiss on them before quickly pulling away, probably leaving her very confused.

And I leave, needing to collect my mind about what I'm going to do with Bess.

[...]

After listening to my grandmother's multiple complaints about why I haven't been to visit her in days and why I don't sleep at her house so often anymore, I wander aimlessly around the city.

Thoughts come and go about Bess.

Evan's right, she's easily digging deep inside of me.

Even in the short time she's been with me, her innocence and sweetness have broken down every wall I've put up against women since David and Violet.

But it is still wrong because she is underage and emotionally as vulnerable as a girl who has had no childhood or adolescence would be. And maybe all those repressed emotions she is living now and to the fullest. And I can't take advantage of it.

So I must put boundaries between us.

If only I didn't forget what is right or wrong when I have close to her, looking at me with those devilishly beautiful eyes, everything would be easier.

When I enter the apartment it is after twelve at night. Everything is dark except for the kitchen light that stays on.

“Christina” I say when I see her looking for something inside the fridge. "And Bess?"

"She stayed waiting for you until half past eleven," she says. "It was really hard to convince her to sleep, but I finally did."

“Christ, take cover!” I groan as she turns and I see that the plain t-shirt she's wearing on hers gives me a clear view of her breasts.

Unpleasant.

"Get over it, it's just boobs," she says, pouring herself a glass of milk.

"I want to see your breasts as much as I want to see my sister's," I say with annoyance. "God, I swear I'm going to throw up."

She ignores me.

"Do you wanna milk?" she asks me.

I nod and she quickly hands me a glass of the cold white drink.

"Did you have dinner?"

"Yeah, I ordered Chinese and Bess loved it," she smiles as she sits on the counter, watching her feet shuffle playfully. “She was dying of laughter while she taught him how to use chopsticks”.

I smile, picturing my pretty girl learning to eat with those skinny chopsticks.

It must have been quite a sight.

"Aaron?"

"Yes?" I ask as I sit next to her, nudging her hips a bit with mine so she turns me over to her side.

"I'm glad you're making progress," I trail off, knowing what she means. “I was thirteen when it happened, but I clearly remember your and my brother's suffering. Evan took it easier and I understand why... I just want you to know that you have the right to rebuild your life and Bess seems to be the door you need to open to start over."

“She is a minor” I remind her. "If something happened between us, it would be impossible..."

"Bess is vulnerable and strong at the same time, you know?" She interrupts me. “She is innocent, but at the same time she is aware of what evil is. She is a girl, but she is also a woman. All of her is a contradiction, so don't underestimate her. I'm sure she can handle more than you think, so don't hesitate to lean on her when you need it."

I smile with amusement.

“Since when do you care about me, cockatoo?”

"I don't care about you, fool," she says mockingly, but I know she's lying. I'm also lying when I say I can't stand it her. "But I always see you and my brother so alone... David really left a hole in you guys when he left and I think Bess is what you need to fill it... That's it."

I shake my head, not paying attention to her words.

I've already made up my mind, and it's for Bess's own good.

I just have to remember it when I has it close to her.

We quietly drink our milks and when I'm done, I walk quietly to Bess's room.

Christina doesn't follow me and I thank her in my mind.

Bess lies on her bed, her hands holding the warm sheet tightly as a calm expression rests on her face.

I smile, looking at the peace with which she seems to sleep.

I slowly approach her and run the backs of two of my fingers down her cheek, causing her to fidget a little.

“Aaron...” she stammers before opening her eyes. "Aaron," she says more clearly, looking at me.

“Sorry, I woke you up” I apologize, however, I don't move away from her.

It's so damn hard to do it.

What the hell is she doing with me?

"You're here" she says in the middle of a yawn. "I waited for you, but I fell asleep."

“I know, Christina told me.” Before she can ask me where she is, I tell her. "She is in the kitchen, drinking milk."

"Milk?" Her eyes widen even more, sparkling with longing, her smile widening. "I want too, can I?"

"Of course I do" I finally take my touch away from her. "Let's go".

And when Bess stands up and wraps her arms around my torso, walking toward the kitchen holding me, I'm not able to pull her away from me.

And I understand.

I'm really really screwed.