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Ryan Lucas McMillan Jr "You're a f*****g i***t, Rye!" I shouted at myself in the mirror. "Why in the hell did you do that?" I slapped my forehead with my palm. I had just f****d up. I had just f****d up really, really bad. I looked at myself in the mirror, and I couldn't help but laugh. I looked like a miserable fool. I looked like a moron who was drunk. "You're self-destructive and stupid," I said. I saw her face when I had said those things to her. The hurt in her eyes was so profound it spoke volumes. She had slapped me, and she had left. I knew I had really f****d up bad. I knew I had said too much, and I had done too much. But I couldn't help it. I couldn't f*****g help myself. It felt good to get it all off my chest. It felt good to tell her how I felt, how I had been feeling. I