The Keep

CHAPTER 10

CHAPTER 10Even as her hand closed about her knife, Esyal felt a wave of self-reproach. Old habits, she thought. Not that it was an old habit. It was a comparatively new one, but like any habit acquired by the need to survive, it was now as deep as though it had been with her all her life.

She felt strange, disorientated. Probably just the sudden change in her circumstances, she decided, not to mention the food and drink she had just consumed so violently. Her stomach rumbled noisily by way of confirmation and for a moment she thought she was going to vomit. She became aware of a pause in the muttered conversation between the two men that was seeping down to her and she found herself holding her breath.

Then it began again, and soon became part of the background to her inner discourse. She had not been lying when she said she did not know how long she had been there. Was it two days since she had become separated from her group — her doomed group? Three? Four? When she tried to remember, all that came was a shifting patchwork of disconnected thoughts and of these she could not tell which were memories of reality and which were memories of dreams and hallucinations. They told her nothing. The only constant, other than the deep, underlying guilt and fear which was with her still, was an aching memory of endlessly placing one foot in front of the other, of knowing she was utterly lost, of a slow chill spreading outward from inside her as she ate snow in a vain attempt to quench her tormenting thirst: a chill that was the vanguard of the deeper one that began to fill her as she slowly realized she was going to die. She shivered as she drove the spectre away, prompting another pause in the conversation above her. She certainly could not remember how she had come to this place. Some primitive instinct must have drawn her here — made her crawl in like a sick animal. It was a humbling, even degrading image, markedly at odds with that of her as a would-be destroyer of the New Order.

Yet now she was saved and safe. A simple bowl of soup and a little warmth and civilization was indeed seeping back into her bones, as Josyff had said. But with civilization came other concerns. Saved, she might have been, but was she in fact safe? Who could say what chance had brought these men here? And who were they? What threat were they to her? The older one — Nyk? — had said something about lost equipment, but it meant nothing — she had not been listening properly. And the other one, Josyff — a surveyor, had Nyk called him? His voice and manner marked him out as educated, professional... but what was a surveyor doing out here? What was there to survey other than mountains?

My group. The thought was stark and frightening, and again she nearly vomited as she was suddenly floundering in the deep snow, listening to her companions’ cries coming from all directions through the swirling storm. She was vaguely aware of a soft, whimpering keening threading through the noise.

The murmuring about her stopped again, and she was back in the cave, silent, but with all senses alive as she willed herself to stillness. The keening had been hers. Then the whispered word “dreaming” floated down to her, full of understanding and compassion, and the murmuring continued as though it had not been interrupted.

But Esyal’s mind was racing now. Josyff must be a spy of some kind, sent by the New Order to seek out the Rhanen’s hidden camps. Yet even as the thought came to her, so did others denying it. The New Order wouldn’t bother sending spies, they’d just send the army. There’d be no need for even a pretence of subtlety out here, away from any hint of public gaze. Just brute force and killing.

She curled her knees up and wrapped her arms about herself more tightly. The knotted cold inside her that had sent out shivers to shake her entire body uncontrollably was gone now, but she still felt tremors as she drifted in and out of consciousness; thoughts of her lost companions mingling confusedly with concerns for her immediate future, and the identity and intentions of the two strangers. She began to think about what she would tell them in the morning and then, almost in spite of herself, about how she could slip back into society to... to what...?

No answer came, but both guilt and relief washed over her as she found herself thanking whatever fortune it had been that had kept her name from the authorities. With care and thought she could pick up her life...

Her mind shied away from the prospect and returned quickly to her immediate concerns. What to tell her two saviours when the inevitable questions came.

“The best way to deceive is to tell as much of the truth and as few lies as possible,” someone had said to her in the early days of resistance to the New Order. It seemed now to be almost a lifetime away — some other, quite different time. She tried to remember the face of her adviser, but it refused to come to her. She was still struggling after it as she finally fell asleep. Only then did her grip on her knife slacken.

* * * *

“Who on earth can she be?” Josyff said to Nyk as they ate their own meal. Nyk had turned down the stove and the cave was lit only by a low yellow flame which flickered occasionally, bouncing misshapen shadows about the uneven walls.

He paused with a spoon halfway to his mouth and looked down into the darkness which hid their new-found companion. “No idea, boss. Looks like — sounds like — a city girl. But how she came out here — no idea.” He drank his soup noisily then puffed out his cheeks. “She’s damn lucky though.” His voice was shaking slightly as if the enormity of the woman’s plight had only just impinged on him. “Another day or so and...” He shook his head. “I suppose I might have found her one day, but I don’t always camp here. It’s dreadful. Could have lain here forever.” He shivered.

Josyff saw the older man crawling into the cave, pleasantly tired and looking forward to resting, and encountering the decayed remains of the young woman. A shade of Nyk’s shiver reached into him.

“Well, for whatever reason, it didn’t happen,” he said, with forced heartiness. “And whoever she is, she’s safe now. We’ll find out more about her tomorrow.”

* * * *

Josyff woke the following morning to light coming through the cave entrance. It took him a few moments to remember where he was and why, but the first really coherent thought that formed was that he had had a decent night’s sleep, free from dreams and mysterious accidents. He reached up and touched his forehead. It was still sore and he could feel the scar.

It was good to be away from the Keep.

He levered himself up quickly at this treacherous thought only to stop immediately as — good night’s sleep or no — what seemed to be every joint in his body protested at having been obliged to spend the night huddled on a rock floor. As he carefully stretched out he struck Esyal. She sat up with a cry, one hand raised defensively.

“I’m sorry,” Josyff said hastily, holding out his own hands reassuringly. “Don’t be afraid. You’re safe.”

Though he could not see her face properly in the shadows, he caught a glimpse of eyes wide and white. “You’re safe,” he repeated. “We found you here last night, remember?”

The eyes narrowed and Esyal’s posture relaxed.

“Yes,” she said, but under the blanket wrapped about her, her hand was clasped around the handle of her knife again. “Thank you,” she added flatly. She looked round. “Where’s...?”

“Nyk?” Josyff finished the question for her. “Outside, presumably.”

The light in the cave dimmed as Nyk confirmed this by crawling in.

He wasted no time on morning greetings.

“Problems,” he said.

Outside, the sky was overcast and dark grey. For as far as could be seen, it had that heavy uniformity of texture that indicated, “Snow. And probably a lot of it.” Nyk swore softly and his face puckered up in frustration and doubt as he gave this prognosis. Josyff waited. He had nothing to contribute to the older man’s thoughts.

Esyal joined them. She was a little unsteady. Looking at her, Nyk reached his conclusion. “We’ll get some food in us then we’ll have to head back to the Keep.”

“But...”

“We’re nearer the Keep than the village.” Nyk answered Josyff’s protest before he spoke it. “You and me might make it to the village if the snow keeps off long enough, but...” He looked at Esyal, who was gazing around, apparently not listening. He lowered his voice nevertheless. “She’s too weak. She needs rest and some proper food.”

Esyal however, was listening intently. Listening for clues about the two men who had inadvertently saved her life. Too long living with fear had made it difficult for her to trust anyone easily and she had found that silence and inconspicuousness were often her best allies.

The village. What village for mercy’s sake? She had no idea where she was and she repeated again the inward cursing at herself for not having paid more attention to her cousin as he had led her and her group through the mountains. And what was this Keep that Nyk was talking about? She’d definitely never heard of that! And was it her imagination or had she seen a hint of reluctance on Josyff’s part when Nyk had suggested returning there? It was enough for her to make up her mind.

“I’m all right,” she said, straightening up and forcing herself to smile. “Just a little shaky, that’s all. I’ll be fine when...” She risked an expectant look. “When I’ve had something to eat?”

Both Josyff and Nyk smiled at this response and the three were soon inside the cave again, eating a hastily prepared but hot breakfast. Under the influence of the simple fare and the spartan conditions, the mood, briefly, became euphoric, as though the three of them had been companions for years.

“I’m Josyff and this is Nyk,” Josyff said, as they were finishing. “We’re from the Keep. Nyk works there and I’m supposed to be surveying it.”

Esyal told them her name but volunteered no other information.

“What’s the Keep?” she asked. “I’ve never heard of it.”

“Neither had I, until I was sent here,” Josyff replied with a rueful smile. “It’s just a building...” He faltered and pointed vaguely with a piece of bread. “An old building... on top of a mountain.”

Esyal looked as though she was still waiting for an answer. “And what does ‘surveying it’ mean?” she asked after a moment.

Taken aback by such an ingenuous question, Josyff floundered a little before replying, “I just... measure... everything and then draw plans of the place.”

Esyal nodded, then her forehead creased. “Who would want plans of an old building on top of a mountain miles from anywhere?” Immediately her hand came to her mouth. “I’m sorry, that was rude, wasn’t it?”

“Not really,” Josyff replied, laughing. “Just... unexpected. And, answering your question, my employers want them.”

“Why?”

The question bounced back without pause and Josyff’s manner sobered abruptly as caution began to reassert itself. He should be careful, he knew nothing about this woman.

“I’ve no idea,” he said. “I work for the Government as a surveyor and I just do as I’m told. Do my job as well as I can.”

He was with the New Order, then, Esyal thought, and it was with some difficulty that she restrained her bitter reply: “Too many of you just do as you’re told!”

“I’m sorry,” she said instead. “That was rude. I spoke without thinking.”

Less inclined to be forthcoming now, Josyff turned to his own questions. “Anyway, what are you doing out here, wandering lost?”

“Wandering, lost,” Esyal echoed by way of reply. Before sleeping and since waking, she had arrived at no conclusion about the deceit she should use when these questions arose. She put her hand to her head and made a worried face. “I can’t remember how I came here. I just remember walking and walking.”

“Was anyone with you?” Nyk asked. “Where do you come from?”

Esyal shrugged her shoulders and made a helpless gesture. “I don’t know,” she said, hastily adding, “I mean, I don’t know if anyone was with me. I live in Dirriol.” She held out a hand to stop the expected questions. “I can remember some things but not others, it’s...”

Josyff and Nyk exchanged a glance.

“Never mind,” Josyff said, as reassuringly as he could manage. “You’ve had a nasty experience and you’re still a bit shaky. Don’t worry. The most important thing is that you’re safe now. Everything will come back in time, I’m sure.”

“And in the meantime we’d better set off back to the Keep before the snow starts,” Nyk said, briskly gathering up their plates and the stove.

Once again, Esyal caught a hint of reluctance on Josyff’s part.

“I’d like to go to the village,” she said quickly. “I want to get back to normal — find out what I’m doing here.” She put her hands to her head again. “Get my memory back.”

Nyk looked openly anxious. He repeated his earlier concerns. The Keep was nearer than the village, Esyal would still be weak.

“No, I’m well now,” she protested. “The rest and the food were all I needed. I’ll manage. I won’t hold you up.” She looked around the cave and quite genuinely said, “I want to get out of these mountains. I don’t want to go further into them.”

“It’s going to be difficult either way if it starts to snow,” Josyff offered quietly, as keen to press on to the village as Esyal, but reluctant to force Nyk’s judgement.

Nyk wavered.

“If there was anyone with me, they might need help,” Esyal said, as a final tilt. “Perhaps they’ll know back at the village.”

Nyk made to reply but changed his mind and gave a terse nod of acceptance.

Outside, the sky was unchanged.

“We must get as far as we can before the snow comes,” Nyk added as a parting shot to no one in particular.

The terrain was easier than that which they had travelled over previously but, despite his sense of urgency, Nyk maintained a cautious pace. Nothing was to be gained and much could be lost by their exhausting themselves walking too fast through the snow or risking injury.

After an hour, snow began to fall.

“Stay close,” Nyk commanded. “The way’s not too difficult but it is long. We mustn’t get separated.”

Gradually the snow became heavier and the surrounding mountains disappeared into the descending grey sky. None of the three walkers spoke as they trudged along until Nyk stopped them for a brief rest at the top of a slope.

As they halted, silence closed about their small, grey world. A muffled silence, total except for the almost imperceptible hiss of the falling snow.

Josyff looked into the greyness ahead of them, then took Nyk’s arm and pointed.

Three figures were approaching them.