Destined to be his Wife - Forced by Fate

Let's Move On

TangShi wandered into the apartment ahead of YuZhi, pulling off his suit jacket he had draped on her when leaving the event and dropped it carefully on the counter of the kitchen. YuZhi walked in behind her, throwing his keys and cell on top of it and caught her by the elbow before she got any further.

“Hey, you okay?” he pulled her back to face him, scrutinizing her mood and appearance now they were home in decent lighting. The drive back had been quiet and tense as they both got lost in their thoughts and didn’t want to say much in front of the limo driver. He wasn’t a usual driver for YuZhi, so they had kept it for getting home.

“I’m fine. Tired, a little rattled, but I’m okay. What about you?” TangShi reached up to touch his shoulder that had taken the brunt of the glass and he shrugged it off, pulling her in against him and gave her a hug. Cradling the back of her head against him and burying his face in the nape of her neck. Wrapped up in a bear hug as they both released the pent-up tension they were harboring. TangShi sunk against him, sliding her hands up around his back and they stood that way for a few minutes. Quietly breathing in slow unison as they both unwound the stress of that encounter.

“I’m fine. No injuries. Listen, Tang, nothing she said was true. Don’t take any of it to heart. I don’t want you feeling bad or guilty over Rhea’s tantrum. She made her own choices, and this is about her and me and our messed-up relationship. It’s nothing to do with you or anything you have done. I’m sorry about tonight.” He tilted her head back with a finger under her chin so he could look her directly in the eye, smoothing back the hair that had fallen down from getting soaked. Guilt eating him at how innocent she looked when ruffled and tired after the hell of tonight.

“Will you see her tomorrow and smooth things over again?” TangShi was torn about her own feelings. Having Rhea act that way and attack her had been a shock and shaken her to the core. Now she wondered if they were ever friends at all and didn’t really want to care anymore about Rhea Cheng. Linlin would never treat TangShi that way and she knew it meant Rhea never cared about her. YuZhi was right about them never being friends.

“No. I ended everything when you left the room. Told her it was done. We are done.” YuZhi let go of TangShi and paced past her into the kitchen to make coffee, wound up and exhausted but still angry about tonight. Every time he pictured it in his head he wanted to break something. He couldn’t believe the girl he knew all these years could be so violent and vindictive.

“What? What do you mean, over?” TangShi gawped at him and followed. Unsure what exactly he was implying.

“The plan for two years from now. Her and I. It’s finished.” He shut it down quickly not willing to elaborate anymore but TangShi couldn’t leave it alone.

“But you love her, she’s your long-term girlfriend. You’re supposed to eventually marry her.” She stated on automatic pilot, her heart rate upping and her nerves growing in her belly even though she didn’t know why.

“If I’m being honest, this was a long time coming. I know the media painted us to be this perfect couple, but we had our problems and some of them were huge. This was the straw that broke the camel’s back, and I can’t keep ignoring the reality of it.” He waved a mug in TangShi’s direction to ask if she wanted coffee too and set about the task when she nodded. Trying to focus on doing something, rather than thinking more.

“So, it’s really …. done? No future plan, no thoughts of dating her again when you’re free?” She didn’t know how to feel about that because Rhea was the one thing that always stood between them, like an invisible barrier. An end goal for him. Without her and the plan, she didn’t know what would happen when her time with YuZhi ended.

“I thought I loved her. All these years as her friend, then her boyfriend, I ignored a lot of red flags about us. I cared about her, and I wanted her to be happy, but if I’m being honest, I didn’t really put effort into our relationship. I went with what she wanted and worked so much we spent minimal time together anyway. Rebelling against this marriage, was more about being forced against my will to do something, other than about screwing up my future with Rhea. I didn’t realize it until now.”

The honesty in that statement made them both look at one another and stare in pensive silence for a moment. The air heavy with tension.

“Didn’t you live here together? Have a life? Maybe it’s because you’ve forgotten what it was like that you’re only thinking of the bad stuff now, because you’re upset.” TangShi gestured around, sure she had heard Rhea say this was where she slept every night, but YuZhi shook his head. TangShi didn’t want this sudden knee jerk reaction from him if he was going to regret it and cause himself pain. She was scared for him that it was impulsive, and he would live to regret it. Her heart was terrified to put any hope in place that he might no longer be bound to another woman.

“My grandfather was never cool about us, and a part of me thought I was respecting him by keeping things on the date level and not moving. When I look back, I never wanted to move forward because it suited me how we were. I had my date when I needed her, it kept things simple, but could live my life without having to consider her plans or commit all the way. I knew she loved me enough to put up with anything as long as I came when she clicked her fingers, and I didn’t rock the boat. I thought I was content and that was how it was meant to be.” He had been thinking a lot on the long drive home, about all of this and tonight he had some kind of lightbulb moment that he had ignored for a long time. She had switched something off in him, and it had widened a crack and let a lot of negativity out that he had pushed aside for a long time.

“You’ve been friends your whole life, maybe you’re just mad at her tonight and not seeing it clearly. After some sleep you might feel differently.”

“It’s more than that. It’s been there in my head for months now. The worse things got between us. I’ve hidden a lot of it from you. The calls, texts, the drop ins to my office, and the constant demands and emotional blackmail. Rhea has been clinging on and making life hell for me since we got married but she’s so good at projecting that kind and loving girl on the world that I wanted to believe it was all fallout and would pass in time.” YuZhi sighed and watched the percolator filling the coffee jug, pushing their mugs aside and leaned down to rest his arms and face on the cool worktop. Exhaling with a long blow to try and ease the building headache.

TangShi came around, hating seeing him like this and rubbed his back and shoulder, trying anything to comfort him because he made her heart bleed. She knew he was confused and frustrated, and she didn’t want that tiny flicker of hope to grow when her gut said none of this was real. He was drunk, even if he didn’t seem it, and angry. Tomorrow was a new day.

“It’s understandable. She loves you so much and this contract, this thing between us, it would drive any sane woman crazy. I can’t begin to know what it feels like to see the love of your life being taken away for two whole years.” TangShi’s biggest flaw in life was her huge empathy for people’s pain that allowed her to justify so many things.

“I get that, I do. It’s hardly a picnic for me either to have all my plans and relationship upended and told I was to marry a girl I didn’t think I had ever met. We had plans on how to deal with it, to stay apart, but she never stuck to them. She made it worse for all of us.” YuZhi got up and walked off, wired and tense at the same time and needed some breathing space. “I felt like I owed her, and it was all wrapped up in thinking she was the one. For being there for me when I needed someone, and I convinced myself my care for her was love. I don’t think it is, not in the way she loves me. I can’t change that now that I’ve finally realized it.”

“What makes you think it isn’t love now? After all this time? Don’t make decisions while wound up and angry.” TangShi waited where she was, leaning one hand against the counter and watched him pace around as he loosened his bow tie and hauled it off, took his sash from around his waist and tossed them on the couch before undoing his top buttons and yanking his shirt out of his pants to loosen him up. Her heart racing at his words but using all her willpower to stay blank and be a friend in this.

“How can it be love when every time I see her name on my phone, I want to ignore it? I’m agitated seeing it. Every time I meet her in person lately, I get irritated with her. And anytime she says or does anything to you, I feel like I hate her.” He finally admitted what he had been afraid to say out loud, for fear he sounded like a heartless bastard. Knowing that it was always there lingering, and he had tried to avoid it. “Does that sound like a healthy relationship based in love?” he looked past her, seeing the coffee machine had stopped and walked back to finish his task. Brushing past TangShi.

“No, it doesn’t, but I’ve never really had a relationship with mutual romantic love, so I don’t know how to compare or help you figure it out.” She blushed, knowing her words sounded immature and pathetic and YuZhi glanced up at her. He pondered her for a minute, saying nothing as he thought about the fact her confession somehow made him feel better. He couldn’t pinpoint why and poured them some black coffee and pushed it out of his head.

“Here.” He slid one to her and took his own to the couch. TangShi lingered to add cream and sugar before following him, dying to get out of this dress but feeling like he needed her company more than she needed to be comfortable. Rustling after him in her puff of fabric.

“I’m sorry she ruined our night.” YuZhi sat down and laid his cup on the center table.

“I was only there for you anyway, so I don’t mind. It was fun before any of that, so it wasn’t entirely ruined.” TangShi shrugged, not caring that they left and happy to be home instead.

“I have no idea if it was caught by reporters. I guess we will find out in the morning. All hell will break loose if they figure out it was a jealousy fight over you and I.”

TangShi froze as she sat down, mulling over what that could mean for their perfectly executed PR story these months and gulped down her coffee to stop the knot forming in her throat. Stressed over it already. Not sure if it came out that Rhea wouldn’t tell the press the truth.

“My grandfather will have a fit. Rhea did us no favors.” YuZhi slumped his head back on the top edge of the couch and relaxed into a casual pose, wanting it all to seep away and yet glad he had her here beside him. ZhengLi would deal with Rhea, get her home in one piece, and call him in the morning to report, but having TangShi safe at home was already calming him down.

“I need to go change; this is awkward.” TangShi admitted defeat while perched on the couch unable to get comfy because of twenty layers of net and voiles which were like sitting on a pile of slidey clothes and too bulky to sit back. YuZhi looked her over and smiled, gestured to her room for her to go.

“You were beautiful tonight, even after she did that. I’m sad to see it come off.”

“Beautiful it may be, but practical it’s not. I’ll be a few minutes.” TangShi wandered off as YuZhi drunk his coffee and got up to stretch out his tense body. It was almost one am already, and he knew they should both get some sleep. As much as he wanted to stay and talk to her all night, until his head stopped buzzing and his mood fully simmered, she looked beat, and he felt guilty for keeping her up.

TangShi returned in cotton pajamas quickly. Her hair taken down and brushed and her face fresh and free from makeup. Looking like the girl she normally was and stopped when she caught YuZhi staring at her. He seemed lost in thought, standing in the middle of the room and then walked towards her with an odd look on his face. Seemingly intent on something.

“What’s wrong?” TangShi hesitated and flickered down in question as he slid her hand into his, leaning in close so their heads almost touched.

“Sleep with me tonight.” He uttered the words so softly, so smoothly, that TangShi thought she misheard him and blinked up in shock, meeting his eyes on hers with perfect focus. His handsome face showing no hints of joking with her. Taken back with the one request she didn’t expect she was unable to formulate words. “I miss sharing a bed with you, and I want you beside me.” His voice was low, and husky, and his exhaustion was evident.

“I…… um…” TangShi swallowed hard, flustered, not knowing how to take that request. She was unsure if this might be a rebound thing that men do, but it might also be a need for comfort. She didn’t understand or want to jump to conclusions. His expression was telling her nothing. “I don’t know if we …” She faltered, her voice dying mid-sentence, suddenly overly nervous that he might want something physical, and she wasn’t ready. He only just broke up properly with his girlfriend.

YuZhi reached up with his other hand and traced the shape of her jawline with his thumb. Sending her skin into overdrive as it goosebumped all over, her body clenched up inside, aware how intimate this was and instantly scared that this might be too loaded and a mistake. He wasn’t thinking clearly.

“You’re legally my wife. Surely it’s not a big deal seeing as we slept in one bed for months already. I’m not asking you to have s*x, just be there. I got used to you and I don’t like the fact my bed feels too big now. I miss the tiny person who stole half my mattress.” YuZhi knew he was drunker than he thought, and this was probably a bad idea given how not himself he was tonight, but he didn’t want to go in there alone to sleep. She made him feel better and kept his thoughts calm. He wanted her beside him like she used to be, where he could wake up at any time and the sound of her gentle breathing would lull him back to sleep. He had become dependent on sensing her presence. TangShi felt like security while the rest of his life was a total mess.

“Okay.” TangShi answered without looking at him, too shy to do so, hesitating but unable to refuse him. Her face getting hot while it spread to her hairline. Her heart wanted more, even if her brain was telling her it was dumb.

YuZhi didn’t wait on her changing her mind, smiling softly at her before turning and pulling her with him to his room. Fingers interlaced as he walked on in a suave confident swagger that made her tremble. He didn’t bother with lights, just guided her in and then let go before pushing her to the bed by the waist as he walked off to change. No words, no hints at what was to come.

TangShi hurried over to it, yanked back the duvet and dived in before he could see how crazy anxious she was, how many doubts and conflicting things were going off in her head. She quickly shifted over to the side she used to sleep on and turned her back to the center in a bid to pass out as fast as possible. Hoping if she was out cold they wouldn’t have any weird or awkward encounters and he could sleep it off.

After a few tense minutes of staring at a dark wall, she bristled when she sensed and heard his soft footsteps coming back from the bathroom, where he didn’t shut the door or turn on a light. Aware of his every movement and then held her breath when the bed dipped, scrunching her eyes closed.

His weight shifted, moved in, and the covers were tightened as he got under them. TangShi focused on breathing normally but her breath and heart rate were erratic. It felt like the first time again that they shared a room only this time instead of repulsion and fear of her mean husband, there was nerves and anticipation. She was close to an all-out nervous breakdown.

YuZhi scooted over right up behind her, which was something he never did. Smoothing her hair to the pillow and down to one side out of his way and then pulled her back against him so he could spoon her. Sliding his hand around her waist and getting comfortable with her in his arms. Nestling into her and kicking his leg over hers under the sheets so she was completely held.

“YuZhi?” She gasped impulsively. Feeling trapped even though it also felt really good. Safe and secure as his warm body heat was comforting but her mind was grabbing at reasons not to do this, while flashing her images of Rhea.

“Shhhhh, sleep. Trust me. I won’t do anything.” He whispered it softly into her ear, so close it tickled her neck and cheek and she shivered. YuZhi then seemed to relax behind her and go limp. She was hyperaware of him the entire time, too tense to do anything except stay still as a statue. She waited pensively to see if he would do anything else for what seemed like the longest time until his unmistakable deep breathing pulled her out of her own head. Blinking as her eyes adjusted and tuned into his complete lack of movement.

YuZhi was asleep already. Out cold, breathing like he did when he was far off in dreamland, and she glanced over her shoulder to make sure. Amazed he could pass out in under five minutes but then again he had drunk a lot tonight. His face so near she almost bumped noses and could about making out his flawless features in a serene expression. Holding her tight, cuddling like this was the most normal thing in the world to be doing and yet she didn’t think she would sleep at all now.