Warrior's Mask

2. Save Him

Yoshimura’s POV:

I walked down the path next to the battlegrounds, away from all the commotion about the bloody battle, with Simomi in my hand. I don’t wanna know what those bastards think about the match. I’m already tired of hearing about it, and it’s only just finished. I scowled down at my prism, the metallic ball glinting in the sunlight. I can’t believe I almost lost my 5-year championship title to a nobody. A goddamn nobody! I am so weak that it’s actually pathetic. The very thought of the level I have stooped down to actually makes me nauseous. It’s disgusting. How the hell can I go home and tell my father about this almost loss? He will literally kill me when he finds this out, and I am not looking forward to breaking the news to him. Better for him to find out through me rather than everyone else, I guess. I wonder if someone’s finally assassinated him. That would be something nice to go home to. It’s not like he’ll be missed.

My thoughts soon turned sour again when I heard more people talking about the goddamn battle. I growled, angry at myself for succumbing to such weakness. If there was no crack in the battleground, I would have lost everything I worked so hard to get. I underestimated him and almost had to pay the price. But I guess that’s the charm of the wonder boy. The one thing I don’t understand is how he went from nothing to something in the space of a tournament when he barely knew what he was doing. He still doesn’t. At least Hattori trained non-stop and strove to understand his prism and get better at the sport, so it was understandable that he started going places. But Ishido… he knows nothing about anything, and it frustrates me so much. He didn’t deserve to get that far. He is just a childish i***t who doesn’t deserve a prism.

I sighed. What the hell is wrong with me? How did I fall to such a low level as his? I walked down a set of stairs and onto the beach next to me, then stopped at the seafront. I stared at the sea lapping against the sand, the waves rolling over the top of each other. I had always found water somewhat comforting - I have no idea why. I guess it reminds me of my mother. It was the same colour as her hair, and when the waves rippled against each other it made me think of her hair swaying in the wind. I narrowed my eyes at the water as my mother's smiling face came to mind. She wouldn’t want this. But who the hell cares? She didn’t want me either. That’s probably why she’s dead. Because it was disappointment after disappointment for her and she didn’t want to deal with it anymore. Not that I blame her. I would have done the same thing.

When I had had enough of the waves, irritated by their lack of answers and the memories that awaited me there, I went to throw Simomi into the sea, disappointed in both myself and my prism for showing such weakness in such an important match. Maybe this way I can finally let go. Let go of the memory of the woman who never even wanted me, even if she was the only reason I ever felt human. I didn’t deserve my prism. I never will. I let them down again. I don’t deserve this. Maybe I should perish along with my prism. My thoughts were borderline suicidal, and that’s when a hand suddenly wrapped around my wrist, wrenching me out of my thoughts and bringing me back to this awful reality. I looked behind me to see Hattori, of all people, trying to stop me. What a surprise. His inner Ishido is showing. I still don't understand why he insists on helping me at any chance he gets. I don't do that much for him. Never will do. I glared at him, pissed off that he would even dare stop me. Who does he think he is? He has no say in any of this. I don’t deserve my prism, and he knows that. So why is he trying to stop me? I deserve to suffer for my mistakes, and that means losing everything that currently means something to me. It’s the price I have to pay, whether I want to or not. My father’s furious face flashed across my mind and I had to try to stop myself from physically flinching. It’s not fair. But then again, when was fairness ever in the picture?

“What the hell are you doing?” He yelled, his crimson eyes starting to glow, and I had to repress a shudder. I can’t have it getting bad again. Not now. I brushed it off, trying to ignore it. It was only once, it won’t happen again. Hopefully. I need to be strong. If not for myself, then for him. Hattori was equally as pissed off as me, for several different reasons. Either way, the resentment in his eyes was clear as he returned my glare. He didn’t want to be here as much as I didn’t want him here. And yet he was still here for some goddamn reason. Did he think he owed me something? Or is this so I could owe him a favour? I stared into his eyes and internally sighed. It was neither, he was just being a good f*****g person. Why? I don’t know. He should just succumb to the monster act. It would make his life a lot easier. And mine, to be honest. I can’t protect the bastard forever. That’s the problem with this world. The intelligent people are full of doubts and the stupid people are full of confidence, meaning the idiots have more free reign than the ones who are actually worth a damn to society's growth. I scowled, trying to not let him read me. His eyes scanned me, trying to find any hint of why I was doing this. I have already succumbed to weakness once today, and I refuse to do it again. This s**t stops now.

“What the hell does it look like?” I snapped back, wrenching my wrist from his grip. He shouldn’t be here. He should have just ignored me and continued on with his pitiful day just like everyone else. But for some dumbass reason, Hattori decided to come and stop me. God, I hate him with such a pure passion. He is so weak. I can’t believe that he, of all people, is called my rival. I can’t believe no one in the whole of Japan is stronger than him. It’s ridiculous. It’s not that hard to beat him. And yet I seem to be the only person in this goddamn country who can overpower him. I can’t believe I’m surrounded by weaklings. But it does make my life easier, I guess, so I shouldn’t be complaining. It’s just bullshit.

I once again sighed internally, begrudgingly coming to terms with the fact that we are in the same boat and I shouldn’t hurt him because of that. Plus, despite everything, I would still protect him with my life because he’s my little brother, and I have to put up with him and his stupid ass problems even though we’re not actually related. But that doesn’t matter because of some lame-ass reason that Murasaki thought of that I don’t remember, and I don’t care about. I could just forget that we’re ‘family’, but there’d be no point. We really are in the same boat, so we might as well save each other from drowning. Even if it’s in the cruellest way possible. I scowled at him, wanting him to know how much I currently hated him and everything he stands for. He may be my brother, but we will never be equal. I am better than him in every way possible.

“Why would you destroy your prism like that? What could you possibly gain from having nothing? Huh?” He growled, the venom practically dripping off him. Someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning. What is his problem, and why the hell does he even care? It’s not like I’m screwing him over or anything, which is unfortunate, but I can live with that. For now, at least. The only way this affects him is that it raises him from Japan’s third-best wielder to being its second, just behind Ishido. He might even be first because of how unreliable Ishido is when he’s battling, which is ironic in a way. So, what the hell is his problem? Shouldn’t he want me to destroy my prism? His logic makes no f*****g sense. He should be leaping at the chance to destroy his competition. It’s all we’re good for. We are monsters, after all.

But instead, his eyes held an intensity I had not seen in a while. A fire I thought had been extinguished ages ago. In a way, it was kinda refreshing to see it again. I thought he had completely given up. It was nice to see that fire back in his eyes. I’m glad I could finally bring it back, even if it was only for a minute; a second. It may have only been a glimpse, it may never come back, but it was there, and I thought I would never get it back. The world has been blessed, even if they never wanted the blessing in the first place. But that’s beside the point. I fought a small smile as I delivered my response to his question.

“I’m doing this because I almost lost to a wannabe wielder who doesn’t understand a thing about his prism and can’t wield for crap, and this is the only way I can redeem myself and get rid of all the disappointment that I’m feeling,” I told him, mad at the fact that he of all people would try and stop me. He should hate me; hate me to the point where he should be begging me to do this himself. Not demanding that I stop. This isn’t how it’s supposed to go. This wasn’t the plan. If he lets me do this then he has no more obstacles he has left to overcome, so why would he try? What’s the point? I’m doing him a favour by destroying my prism. I’m doing everyone a favour by quitting, so what the hell? I don’t understand him sometimes. Don’t tell me his morals are getting in the way of his ideals? That’s f*****g stupid. But I guess that’s what happens when you hang out with Ishido too much. You become an i***t. And he’s supposed to be the smart one. I guess not even Hattori is immune to idiocy. To him.

“That’s the way you’re going to solve your problem? How is that going to solve anything for you? You’ll just be back at square one.” He had a murderous look in his eye as he continued to severely scold me about what I’m doing, seemingly unrelenting in his actions. This is f*****g ridiculous. Why won’t he just leave me alone? This doesn’t concern him. At least, not now. Not anymore. He can’t stop me. If I can’t do this while he’s here then I’ll do it later - it’s not that hard to get around him, because I highly doubt he’ll come looking for me to make sure that I still have my prism. He doesn’t care that much about me, and I don’t expect him to. I’m surprised he’s even bothering now. No one else would. “Your prism deserves better than this, Yoshimura, and you know that.”

“You don’t understand!” I said, shaking my head in disbelief at his ignorance. There’s no point in arguing with someone who has no idea how you feel and what you’re going through. He doesn’t know what he’s talking about. I know people think that he’s this almighty being, but he’s not. Even so, he still has so much going for him. What does he know about being at the very bottom? He just… I looked at him, and a mixture of anger and disappointment was in his eyes. There was a hint of sadness that he tried to hide, and I felt a pang of guilt. He’s just stuck being second best to me while trying to live up to the world's expectations and be this perfect being while trying not to become an actual monster as this world makes him out to be one. And he can never get it right. He is a monster, after all. Monsters can’t be perfect, no matter how hard they try. But he’ll give you a run for your money, that’s for sure, despite it never being enough. This world is a cruel and unforgiving place.

“You have no idea how much I understand.” Hattori showed me the broken pieces of his prism, and I could feel Uduusi resonating with his wielder. They’re in perfect sync. That’s pretty impressive, considering they’re not in battle. They have a rare connection. He has something going for him, I’ll give him that. I don’t think he realises how lucky he is to have this connection with his prism. The lucky bastard only had to go through hell to get it. “THIS is a constant reminder that I am second best to YOU, of all people to be stuck trailing behind. It shows me how much I was over my head thinking that I could defeat you. And do you know how disappointing it is to lose to the same person two years in a row, despite how much you train and study for the upcoming match? Not only that, but I broke my promise to my best friend, and was unable to meet him in the finals because YOU were once again in my way. Do you know how frustrating that is?”

I scowled at him, my temper rising and my tolerance level plummeting. This is f*****g ridiculous. Why won’t he just leave me be? This has nothing to do with him. It never has done and it never will do. Why does he suddenly care about me? I’m a Yoshimura - he shouldn’t give a damn about me. No one else does. I’m only here to be a monster and to suffer. I don’t deserve this. If he wants to comfort someone, he should go and see his wannabe friend. And he knows I sure as hell won’t try and comfort him. I couldn’t give a toss what he thought or felt right now. I probably never will do it, especially on a topic like this, “I don’t care how frustrating it is for you, and I don’t care how you feel about the situation. This is about me, and all I care about is crushing the opponent, but my opponent almost crushed me. I don’t deserve to be a wielder anymore.”

“As much as I hate to say it, you do deserve to be a wielder. You may be a complete and utter jackass, but you’ve worked hard for what you’ve got - as hard as any of us have, and I can’t ignore that. And it doesn’t matter that Ishido almost crushed you. It doesn’t mean people think any less of you, and you’re not weak for having another person who can rival you. That’s not necessarily a bad thing. And anyway, as long as you win, who the hell cares if Ishido’s gotten a little bit stronger? You are still the best wielder in Japan. People still respect you, even though you’re a monster who won against the WONDER BOY.” He cried, his voice straining as he tried not to break down there and then, his eyes filled with sorrow and my guilt started to rise. He didn’t deserve this. I shouldn’t be getting angry at him for my problems.

I hate it when he’s reasonable. His last point had really struck home. We were both considered monsters, but I’m the only one who got treated like a person. He is treated as less than trash. That’s an understatement. He is literally nothing in society. It’s painful to watch when you see how hard he tries to live up to every single person’s expectations, perfecting himself to meet everyone’s needs. He tries so hard to be someone else, and every single time he gets shot down. Society will never want him or accept him. I looked at his arms, which were covered in bruises, and the rim of his shirt revealed even more. He’s being beaten because he’s a ‘monster’ when that’s far from the truth. In reality, he’s just your regular gifted child, and they’re afraid of that. Gifted people are threats. All he wants is to just be accepted for once in his life, and here I am complaining about such a stupid thing. It’s pathetic. I’m pathetic. I don’t deserve anything.

“You don’t get it,” I growled, intent on not giving in to him. I don’t care how he feels. I don’t care about anyone. I am all that matters. Hattori will not get the better of me, despite how much I want to admit that he’s at least half right. He will never know what I truly think. NEVER. That may be cruel, but he can take it. He’s stronger than what most people give him credit for. He’s the strongest guy I know, that’s for sure. Like he had a choice, though. “And anyway, why the hell do you care whether I destroy my prism or not?”

“I-I don’t know.” He stammered, his eyes darting away from me as if he was afraid to admit the real reason he was doing it. What has he got to hide that he’s willing to risk destroying his perfect mask to try and hide? I stared at him, suspicious. He would usually have some sort of excuse ready so I don’t worry or ask around or something like that. Unlike his dumbass friend, he’s the prepared type. So what is up with him today? I think I need to keep a closer eye on him. I might need to beat some people up. I might even have to resort to murder. But that’s only if push comes to shove, of course. Ah, f**k it, I’m killing everybody. All the bastards deserve to die anyway. If anyone has taken it too far, even if it’s a tiny bit worse than usual, I will personally give them a one-way ticket to hell where they can meet Satan himself and I will not be sorry about it. They should feel blessed that I went to all the effort of doing all of that for them.

“What’s going on, you guys? What did I miss?”