A Boyfriend for Christmas

A Boyfriend for Christmas By Iyana Jenna Ten years ago I’ve turned twenty-one but I’ve never kissed a man. (I did kiss Dee from the ninth grade but she was, err, not a man.) I’ve never had a boyfriend, either. Since it came to me that I only like guys, I’ve never dared stand too close to someone that caught my attention, or tell them that I liked them. I’m too scared. I feel lonely, and in fact, I am alone. I’m new in this town; I don’t know many people. Actually, I don’t know anyone at all but the janitor who always comes to the office as early as I do. I’m too shy to talk to people around my cubicle, afraid they will see through my eyes, into my head, and find out that I’m different. God, I need a boyfriend. I need someone to talk to, someone who will always be by my side. I want a man to tell all my secrets, my dreams, my desires. Someone who listens to my ramblings and not laughs at them. A person who understands my most confusing utterances that result from my jumbled thoughts. A man who can help interpret what I say to someone else, who completes my sentences even before I myself know what I’m going to say. A man who simply looks into my eyes and understands perfectly what is in my mind. God, I’m one person, but I know I won’t be complete without another. It feels as if I’m just half of a part seeking the other missing half. My eyes want to look into someone else’s. My nose is cold without another’s neck to snuggle into. My lips are frozen. My arms long to wrap around someone else’s shoulders. My body yearns to fit into another’s. God, may I have a boyfriend? May I have a man to carry me up to our bedroom, throw me into the bed, pin me down the mattress? A man whose hands knowingly map the curves of my body and smooth my skin? And his lips—his lips would trace along the corners of mine, blowing kisses in my mouth, whispering love in my ears. May I have a boyfriend, dear Lord?