6 - Why Are You Lying to Me?
Ivy
“No, tell me, did he do that thing with his tongue?”
I giggled, seeing her scrunched face, and shook my head. Her English accent was stronger as she lived in Azmia, in the Golden Palace, and it made me happy seeing her glowing, warm face.
“Why are you laughing? I’m serious, I want to know.”
“No, Zara, he didn’t… he didn’t do anything with his tongue.”
She said nothing for a moment, straightening her phone, the background of one of the gardens in the palace as she walked slowly, guards following her as she finally said,
“What an asshole.”
I chuckled, playing with the hem of my dress. “I still can’t believe you are a Princess.”
Her smile softened, her short dark hair framing her elfin face with sharp cheekbones and hazel eyes that glinted in the sunlight. “I apologize for not telling you sooner about… everything, Ivy.”
I knew. She had apologized and accepted my brother’s proposal, the same man whom she was pining over for years until she stumbled into him in our house.
“It’s okay, Zara, I forgave you a long time ago.”
“Did you tell Hayden about him?” Her expression grew dark.
I sighed and rolled on my back on the bed, looking at the ceiling. “If I tell him that Jason cheated on me with my roommate, he would get mad. Very mad.”
“Furious.” She noted.
“Mhm, and I don’t care about it anymore,” I lied. Of course, I cared about it. My first ever boyfriend cheated on me. With my friend and my roommate. “I just want to move on, focus on my studies, you know.”
“And Aiden.”
My cheeks turned red, thinking about him. She knew about my little crush on him, and she hadn’t stopped convincing me to confess to him and know if he likes me or not.
But I’m too scared to do it.
“You should ask him before you end up getting hurt, Ivy.”
I eyed the closed door of my room. “Maybe you are right, Zara. But you didn’t see how he looked at me this morning. He looked… hungry.”
Like he wanted to eat me.
Her soft laugh made me smile. “Did he look hungry for breakfast, or you?”
I didn’t reply, my cheeks warming.
“You have it bad for him, sweetheart.”
“I know. He is very kind and generous with me. I love talking to him more than Hayden because he doesn’t treat me like a little sister… even though he might think of me that way.”
“Oh, Ivy. You should talk to him about your feelings. Tell him you don’t see him as your elder brother,” she said as she walked from the garden into the Palace, nodding at the maids and guards who bowed at her.
“Please tell me you blocked Jason. If he does anything, I can ask my brothers to—”
“Aiden did.”
“Explain.”
I blushed thinking about how hot he looked when he swore at him, the vein on his neck looking very inviting. “Jason called me during the therapy session and Aiden picked it up. He threatened him and told him not to call me again, blocking his number.”
“That’s good.”
“So, he is now sending me emails and apologizing for having s*x with Amanda.”
“He is a d**k. Block him everywhere.”
“I will—oh s**t, Zara, I am so sorry but I have to go,” I panicked, checking the time, running around my room to shove things into my handbag. Chapstick, sunscreen, house keys and the journal. I didn’t have the time to take out the ruffled papers I had placed inside it and shoved everything inside my bag. “I am going to be late for the therapy session.”
“I love you, bye!”
I sent her a flying kiss as she ended the call. If I drive fast enough and the traffic gods are with me, I can make it in time. Even five minutes early.
***
I didn’t make it in time.
“I am so sorry, Aiden, the traffic was so bad,” I heaved, taking support of my knees to control my breathing. So much for dressing up in a cute dress, applying light makeup and curling my hair in waves for the session. I wiped down the sweat from my forehead and straightened up, daring to peek at him.
Aiden looked like he always did. His face was stern without any emotions. His eyes travelled down my body, and I held in my shiver when they raked over my bare legs.
He made a dramatic point of checking his wristwatch that cost more than the car I drove and hummed. “We will talk about your tardiness after the session. Sit.”
I quickly sat down and drank some water, the cool air of the air conditioner breezing through my skin. The session started, and we made usual talk about my day, what happened that week or if anything exciting happened that I wanted to share with him. There was one moment where I was emotionally overwhelmed when he asked me a couple of questions about my childhood and my ignorant father. But he looked proud of me when I answered them patiently and quietly without tears pooling in my eyes like all the sessions before.
He had told me it would take time to go through my childhood and remember certain instances, but he would be there for me and we could always talk about something else.
“You seem quite happy today, Ivy,” Aiden said, noting something. I ignored the disappointment when he didn’t call me by my nickname. I liked my name, but he always called me Petal.
I twisted my fingers on my lap, the flimsy material of the dress brushing over my thighs. “Yes, I am happy. I am enjoying the vacation, reading books and even called my friend.”
Aiden looked up. “Which friend?”
I grinned. “Zara, Hayden’s fiancée. She showed me the Palace gardens and told me I can visit Azmia anytime.”
“I am glad you have a friend you can rely on, Petal,” he said with a smile.
I crossed my leg and tried not to think about that same smile between my legs, teasing me with his tongue, teeth, and lips.
He asked me about my other friends.
“I haven’t talked to Noah for a while, but we usually DM each other on Instagram.”
His pen halted, and he looked at me, tilting his head. “Noah?”
“Yes, he is a really good friend of mine. Very sweet and charming. He always buys me iced coffee when we study together in the library during finals.”
“Hm.” Aiden didn’t ask anything more about him and questioned, “And you lived in a dorm, right? What about your roommate?”
My smile dropped, and I looked at the coffee table between us. Somewhere inside his office, a paper rustled and the sound of swallowing the lump in my throat reminded me of my friend having s*x with my boyfriend—ex-boyfriend— in my room.
“Ivy?”
I blinked at Aiden and shook my head. “It’s n-nothing.”
“Tell me.” He said, “Take a deep breath and tell me about your roommate.”
So I did. Scrunching my hands into fists as I recalled the events of that day. Going to my dorms late at night after studying for hours in library and thinking Amanda had another guy over like all the other times, but the shoes belonged to Jason. I had gifted them to him for our three-month anniversary and walking into my room to see both of them embracing each other, moaning each other’s names. Jason had never touched me like that. Never.
“He cheated on you. With your roommate. Your friend.” Aiden’s expression was blank, but I knew he was angry. His dark grey eyes had turned almost onyx, and it made me feel warm.
“Yes.” I shrugged. “I left them and came back in the morning to pack my bags and come home to be with my brother. You know the rest.”
There was silence in the office. I had gotten used to it.
“And how did that made you feel, Ivy? Seeing your boyfriend—”
“Ex-boyfriend.” I corrected him.
“Yes. Seeing your ex-boyfriend with a person who you thought was your friend?”
“It hurt.” I sniffled and blinked my eyes. I won’t cry. I won’t cry. I won’t cry. “It still hurts. I thought he liked me, even loved me, but you don’t hurt the person you love. Not like that.”
“Do you want to talk more about it?” He asked softly, knowing well that if we delved into it, I would cry.
I shook my head and pursed my lips.
“Okay, tell me about your journaling.”
We talked more about the days where I would write two-three pages a day or days when I could barely write a paragraph. He listened to me and asked questions when I would stop talking, urging me to drink water and keep going.
“Do you mind if I see what you’ve written?” He asked, his dark eyes soft.
My muscles tensed as I met his obsidian eyes. They ran over my body and noticed how stiff I had become. My eyes lingered on his light blue shirt, stretching over his shoulders, the sleeves rolled up to his elbows, with a navy-colored tie. Maybe it was my imagination when I thought his eyes had stayed far too long on my chest and my legs. I shuffled in my seat and tucked the strand of my hair behind my ear.
Aiden’s eyes flickered to my face, and he closed them for a moment, as if he was taking his time. He finally said, “You don’t have to if you don’t want me to read. I will understand and respect your privacy.”
I licked my lips, trusting my instinct. “I-it’s okay, I don’t mind. You can read it.”
I handed him the diary, frowning at the ruffled separate pages that I had shoved between them. He silently read the entry of my first day while I squirmed in my seat. I may or may not have drunk too much water, so I excused myself to the washroom.
When I came back, I could feel the change in the air. Aiden was sitting on the couch, but his posture was stiff. He barely addressed my presence when I sat down in my seat. I saw the diary was placed beside him and his jaw was clenched.
“Is everything okay?” I asked, my voice small.
He finally looked at me and the corner of his lips twitched. Leaning back on the couch, he said, “Yes, I suppose you could say that. I want to ask you something, Petal, and I want you to be honest about it.”
Frowning, I nodded.
His eyes darkened, and he said in a stern voice, “Use your mouth.”
“I—um, yes, Doctor Aiden.”
I didn’t know why I felt the need to address him seriously.
“What were you doing this morning?”
My eyes widened, my heart pounding in my ears. I glanced at the diary and it struck me. Those ruffled pages. s**t, s**t, s**t. After journaling every day for a week, I wrote my fantasies regarding Aiden on different torn pages. I always tucked them back in the diary, reminding myself to pull them out before I brought it to the session. But I was in such a hurry that I had completely forgotten about them.
Did he read it? I hoped he didn’t. I would rather eat raw broccoli than have him read all those pages.
Looking away from him, I lied and carelessly shrugged my shoulder. “I was meditating.”
I mentally winced at my lie. He had tried coaching me to meditate, but I could never do it.
He is right. I am a terrible liar.
Aiden raised his eyebrows. “Is that so?”
I didn’t like the tone of his voice. He seemed serious, and I prayed that the ground would swallow me up. He waited for my answer, crossing his arms over his chest. I got distracted by the way his biceps bulged.
He noticed me staring. I glanced down at my lap, twiddling my thumbs. “Y-yes, Doctor Aiden, I was meditating and I-I focused on my breath like you taught me—”
“Why are you lying to me, Ivy?”
My head snapped at him. I shook my head, “I-I am not lying.”
Aiden tilted his head and my throat went dry when he said, “Then why did I hear your voice moaning my name when you orgasmed with your fingers inside your p***y?”