In Our Heads (bxb) Completed

Chapter 4

*****

Theodore threw his bag over his shoulder as he climbed out of the car and locked it. It was one of the days his stepfather was not using it so he had used it to take his younger brother Zion to school before driving to his own.

The car was not in the best shape with some dents and chipping paint and it stuck out among the perfectly paved school grounds as it was surrounded by neatly trimmed bushes… and then there was the other students cars that all seemed to have been manufactured in the past couple of years. It did not really bother him how out of place the car looked. He was lucky to be in the school, it had a good reputation amongst business and tertiary institutions. Saying you came from Richmore High School – especially due to scholarship – was something that had many advantages and he intended to use it as best he could.

What bothered him was the stares he kept getting from every single person as he passed them. He had not had the school uniform on Friday as it was a little expensive but managed to get enough money for it by Saturday, and yet even as he walked into the school fully dressed in their black and royal blue uniform, people still stared at him. He knew it was because he was new, an unfamiliar face in a school like this definitely stuck out but he hated the attention. It always made him incredibly anxious. It would be fine in a few weeks though, when everyone got used to him… That was what he liked to think.

He made his way through the halls trying his best to ignore the stars he was getting and avoid as much eye contact as he could while listening to people talk about him. Some of it was flattering, most of it was them wondering who he was and what grade he was in.

He let out a sigh feeling his shoulders relax as he reached his locker. There were less people in this hallway than the others as it was further towards the back of the school, he was grateful for that. Maybe he would spend his lunches in the hallway if the teachers did not pressure him about no one being allowed to be there at the time.

“Hey. Theodore, right?” He glanced towards his right to see one of the people he had seen Cassian hang around with the first day he had attended the school along with someone he had never seen before. The guy he recognised was blond and about the same height as Theodore. He nodded to answer the question and returned his gaze to his locker hoping to be left alone as he realised there were more eyes turning towards them in the hall the longer the guy stayed beside him, “We have a tradition here, you know.” He said.

“I’m not very traditional.” Theodore replied. He heard a chuckle as the guy stepped closer to him and clenched his jaw when his locker was suddenly shoved closed in front of him. He did not really know how to react to it, at his old school he was a loner but people just let him be. He was not the type to confront anyone and usually steered clear of anything that lead to unnecessary confrontation. What was happening right now, in front of everyone else in the hallway was making his heart beat harder in his chest and his throat dry up as he tried to figure out whether to shove the guy away or just leave. He could not afford a fight, especially given that there were two of them.

“Well, we have a tradition here.” The guy repeated, “Scholarship kids earn their lockers.” He said. It was followed by silence, as if he was waiting for Theodore to ask how. He was not going to, and the guy never got a chance to say more because someone else spoke.

“Kian, Jake, what are you guys doing?” It was Cassian’s voice from somewhere to his right, behind the guy’s back.

“Speaking to scholarship.” The guy replied.

“You forgot we had a meeting?” Cassian asked, “Stop messing around. Come on.”

“Seems I have somewhere to be, I guess we’ll have to talk later.” They stepped back and walked off without much else and Theodore felt his face heat slightly at the fact that everyone around them had just watched him do nothing to stand up for himself. Still, he had a goal. He just needed to get through the school year. He was going to do so quietly.

He opened his locker to place his books into it before he shut it and made his way towards nowhere in particular, hoping to find a quiet place to be until the bell rang to signal the start of the school day.

Cassian could hear a locker open behind them as soon as they began to walk away and glanced back to see Theodore just casually packing his books into his locker before he disappeared behind the wall once they turned the corner.

“Are you bored?” Cassian spoke up as they walked towards the classroom the rest of the team was waiting in. They had ten minutes before school started and then a match after school so he was just going to talk to them about what time to be ready by.

“What?” Jake chuckled.

“You’re really still hazing scholarships? Isn’t that a 10th-grade thing?” He never liked the hierarchy his school had and tried to stay out of it. Some of his friends did not though.

There was a few things people did to show scholarships, or students with less wealth that they were at a lower level than people like… well, Cassian. Whose family was beyond well off and had been for generations. There was the ‘earn your locker’ by running errands or basically being pushed around to serve a group of ‘higher’ students. There was knowing that as a lower class, the scholarship would step out of the way when approached by anyone else or not sit at certain places in the cafeteria, could join certain clubs that are above your position. Usually disobeying any of the set rules resulted in a physical reprimanding that the teachers pretended not to notice because the school was basically run by the money that parents brought in, parents of higher levels.

“This one deserves to be taken down a few notches,” Kian replied.

“How do you know who needs to be ‘taken down a few notches’?” Cassian asked.

“He’s a scholarship acting like a stuck-up prick. Who does he think he is? We’ll show him that his attitude should match his place.” Kian laughed when Jake diminished and Cassian shook his head as they reached the classroom and entered a different kind of loud as all his teammates were laughing and yelling as they threw the ball to each other.

He called out for them to quiet down before he conveyed why he had called them there. It only took five of the ten minutes that they had before the bell would ring and so when he finished talking he hopped onto one of the tables and began joining the conversation that was happening before he walked in while he began tossing the ball around with the others. When he was laughing at something that one of the guys had said, he caught himself glancing over at the door like he expected to see someone. He did not. He just wondered where Theodore was. Back in the hall, he could not tell his reaction to Kian and Jake, he was afraid a fight would break out because Theodore did not look like someone that took well to people messing with him… and yet, he did not fight them. He did not even react to Kian being in his face. Maybe he wouldn’t fight? He seemed interesting, it only made Cassian want to talk to him more.

The bell rang signalling that it was time for homeroom and everyone dispersed from the classroom. Cassian walked with a few of his friends that shared the same class and smiled when he spotted Theodore heading towards them in the hallway when they finally reached their class. He let his friends walk in before him as we waited at the door until the boy that had inner at his house reached him.

“Hey.” He greeted. Theodore stopped walking in front of him and looked at him as if he was waiting for Cassian to say more, so he said the first thing that came to his mind, “Um… did you get back alright last night?”

“Yes.” Cassian knew it was a stupid question given that if he had not, Theodore would not have been standing in front of him looking so nonchalant at the moment.

“Your mom wasn’t mad?” He asked wanting to prolong the conversation that Theodore seemed to blatantly want the opposite for.

“No.” He replied. Cassian opened his mouth about to ask if he wanted to join them at lunch but stopped when Theodore continued, “Should get inside.” He did not wait for a reply before he turned to go into the classroom.

Cassian bit the inside of his cheek as he stepped into the classroom feeling a little deflated that Theodore did not seem to want to build on what had started the previous night. Was it because he Cassian’s friends were the people hassling him? It could not just be that considering that he had been the same amount of stand-offish when they met on Friday. Maybe he was just introverted. It only made Cassian want to get Theodore to talk to him more.

“What was that?” He looked at Kian as he took his usual seat.

“Just talking.” He shrugged.

“Is someone jealous?” Amber asked from behind him. Kian snorted. Cassian frowned at her hinting that there was something for his ex to be jealous about, like a relationship between him and Theodore.

“He’s nothing.” He Kian replied.

Cassian brushed that off despite his dislike of the wording and turned to the front of the room as everyone else did when their teacher called out a morning greeting to them. As she began taking names, he glanced over to where Theodore had taken a seat near the front of the class. He smiled to himself seeing the guy focused on tapping his fingers against the table and decided he was going to keep trying to talk to Theodore.

The next few classes ran by pretty uneventfully and he did not see Theodore at lunch before the school day ended and it was time for the game. It was an away so they had to take the bus to the other school where they played and won the match and when they returned the school was empty and the sky darkening. The team was happy though, so they stayed a while more while they got cleaned up, playing around in the locker room as they did.

“Hey, Captain.” He looked up from tying his sneaker laces when one of the guys threw their arm around his shoulders.

“Party at Jake’s on Friday, you can’t say no because you’ve skipped everything else.” He laughed as basically the entire team shouted in agreement.

“Sorry guys, I may have a meeting.”

“Come on, meetings don’t last all night.”

“I’ll ask my parents.”

“Dude!” Cassian looked up surprised when Lance literally yelled at him, “You can’t ask them, they never agree to anything. You have to sneak out.”

“Yes!” Kian agreed.

“Guys –”

“Come on, Cassian. It’s our last year here. You seriously are not going to hang out with everyone this year?” Cassian looked at the people that were around him, all of their faces expectant as they waited for his answer.

“You can’t let us finish high school and never once have partied with the entire team in one place,” Lance said.

“Who are you?” Cassian asked. The guys laughed as Lance grinned. When they met Lance had been so quiet and withdrawn from everyone, now he was trying to convince Cassian to go to party with them.

“You brought me out of my shell, it’s time you came out of your own, Captain.” It made Cassian smile until one of the other guys spoke.

“God, that’s cheesy.” They laughed as they broke into their own conversations and he finished with his shoes before he grabbed his gym bag and began to make his way out of the locker room with Kian and Lance. They walked across the field and around the school before they arrived at the parking lot.

“So, you coming?” Lance asked when they reached the Mercedes his father was waiting in. It was not usual for Lance’s father to pick him up because usually he was too busy to. Cassian and Kian each greeted the older man in the driver’s seat and the greetings were immediately followed by a few minutes of them talking to him about what their parents were up to currently up to before turning back to Lance.

“We’ll see.” He doubted there was any possible way he could sneak out… unless… unless he bribed the guards at their front gate and convinced them not to tell his parents while he was gone.

“Sounds like a no.” Lance frowned.

“It’s a ‘we’ll see’. See you tomorrow, man.” They fist-bumped before Lance climbed into the car and his father drove off towards the school gate.

Cassian turned to look over at the Audi his usual driver, Jonathan, was seated in before he attempted to greet Kian but his friend spoke.

“I heard you’re going out with Ryan.” Cassian raised his brows at Kian.

“Ryan? No. Heard from who? Amber told you we hung out at the party?” He frowned. His cousin just loved creating non-existent romances for everyone. Kian shrugged. “I’m not.” It was a little awkward to say because he did not know why he had to say that to Kian. They were not together, had not been for a few months. It was not really any of his business who Kian went out with… unless… Cassian became even more awkward realising Kian still liked him enough to get jealous about a rumour of him being with someone else. “Well, goodnight.” Cassian nodded at his friend.

“Goodnight, Ian.” He made no attempt to make his way towards the car waiting for him after the greeting, so instead Cassian smiled at him and backed away before turning to climb into the back of the Audi.

“Hey, Johnathan.”

“Good evening, Mr Carmichael.” Despite having driven the Carmichael family for many years and Cassian’s constant insistence that he just call him by his name, Johnathan refused to use anything but their surnames to address them, Cassian's parents preferred it but he didn't like being addressed that way, “How was the game?”

“We won.”

“As usual.” Cassian smiled as Johnathan glanced back at him through the rearview mirror.

The rest of the drive home was mostly silent apart from the soft pop music coming from the radio and Johnathan asking Cassian if he wanted to stop on the way home. When they arrived back at the house, he let Cassian out at the front door before proceeding to park the car while Cassian made his way inside.

The house was quiet, which was not unusual and he began to make his way upstairs to put his bag in his room before looking for his parents. He found his father in his study, working, so he closed the door just as softly as he had opened it to peek inside before making his way over to his mother’s study. She too was working, but unlike his father, she looked up from her work.

“Sweetie, you’re back. We had dinner without you but Rosa will fix something up for you.” Cassian nodded, although he did not feel particularly hungry despite having just played a game.

He shut her door figuring he would tell Rosa he was fine with an apple and then head back up to his room to do his homework. He found her in the kitchen and when he told her he was not hungry, she frowned and reached out to touch his head.

“I’m not sick.” He chuckled as she dropped her hand when she seemed satisfied with the temperature.

“You did not eat all your dinner last night either.”

“Ah, we had a guest last night and I’ve eaten back at the game.” He said.

“Alright, if you get hungry, tell me.”

“I will. Thank you, Rosa. Goodnight.” He smiled at her before he grabbed an apple and a bottle of water and made his way back upstairs into his room.

He spent the next couple of hours chewing on the apple as he did his homework, studied for his upcoming mathematics test and creating changes to his schedule. When he was finished, he leaned back in his seat, tilting his head back as he tried to see the alarm clock on his nightstand without turning around before he realised it was impossible and just turned to look at it. It was just past ten which gave him just less than eight hours of sleep if he went to bed immediately. He yawned as he stood up but decided to take a shower before bed and made his way to his in-suit bathroom instead.

When he was finished, he peeked out of his window at their dark backyard. The walls around their yard were way too high to climb over, if he was going to try to sneak out to go to that party for his friends, he would have to convince the guards at the front gate to keep it a secret that he was leaving. Maybe he could bribe them with snack bags, he had noticed Damien, one of the guards, always eating something when he was neary. He would probably like a bunch of free snacks. Cassian chuckled as he stepped back from the window. Planning to sneak out felt quite exciting, it was not something he had ever done or considered doing before, but Lance was right. If he asked his parents if he could go, they would probably call it a waste of time as there was no one of beneficial importance to network with, so there was nothing he could really gain from going to the party. It would be fun though… just hanging out with everyone. He could not remember ever just hanging out with everyone outside of school. He was always the busy one that could never make time for their gatherings.

He made his way over to the bed to pull the covers aside and flop into bed like he was beyond tired when he was not really before he grabbed the remote beside his bed to turn the lights off leaving him in the dark as he covered himself with the blankets.

Maybe his parents were right though, when his friends talked about their parties, it was mostly just gossip and excitement about who got with each other, who wanted to or actually did start a fight or who passed out. That reminded him that people often drank at the parties and caused him to glance at his doors. His parents would have none of it if he asked them, but he promised his friends he would do it just this once.

He sighed turning onto his side as he tried to clear his mind so he could go to sleep but it could not seem to quiet down as math problems and interview questions ran through it, there was a little part of it that kept drifting off to think about Theodore too and Cassian was beginning to wonder if he was forming some type of crush on the guy given that he could not seem to get him out of his mind. He had no time to think about dating, he had decided when he broke up with Kian that his final year would be focused solely on school and his work, Kian had pointed out that that was all he ever focused on anyway. He frowned remembering that conversation and brushing all of it from his mind while he let out a groan and tried to focus on sleeping again.

After a few hours of tossing and turning with nothing particularly important running through his mind, yet somehow being completely unable to even drift off slightly, he rolled onto his back and let out a sigh in annoyance at his lack of sleep. He shut his eyes feeling his chest tighten suddenly, like he was afraid of or worried about something without there being anything to be either afraid or worried about. Opening his eyes to stare up at the shadow of darkness that covered the white ceiling above him he tried to run though whether he had forgotten to do some homework, study for another test or call someone about something important. There was nothing he could think of, but that did not make the tight feeling in his chest relax or calm his heart as it began to race.

He let out a groan sitting up in bed. It was obvious he was not going to get any sleep. So while he was awake, he might as well have gotten some work done instead of just tossing around in bed for hours doing nothing constructive. It would probably also distract him from whatever he felt worried about as he could not figure that out. With that thought, he pushed aside his covers and returned to his desk to look ahead at some of the work they had not covered yet in school.

*****