Bittersweet Love

Chapter Nine: Deja vu

Zander

“Why the f**k are guys you all the way out at Mac’s?” I groaned as I got in my car and made my way to this stupid bar that’s almost an hour away. I didn’t need this s**t. I had things to do to prove to Elle I meant what I said. I have been there for her every goddamn year. I fought for her even what she didn't fuckin' know it and I was going to show her that I do truly love her.

She’s been on my mind constantly. She doesn’t know this but I’ve been there. I’ve watched her and Aless and made sure they were okay. I’ve been the person behind the scenes and they have no idea because I guarantee that my shithead of a cousin took all the damn credit for it. I might take a page out of Elle's book and throat punch the fucker.

I’ve been avoiding him for two goddamn weeks. He's not subtle when it comes to Patricia and he thinks I care. He is also talking to the other guys in the office about Elle, saying they're working things out. Bullshit. They can see through his lies and I could tell they're furious. They have a respect for her, more than he knows. I've had to pull a couple to the side and calm them down.

On a bright now, my divorce with Patricia is finalized and I’m a free man but that doesn’t stop her from constantly calling and messaging me about how I ruined her life. Newsflash, I don’t care. She has her inheritence. It's not my fault if she spent all her damn money. She can go running to mommy and daddy if she needs it because she's not getting another damn dime from me.

“B-because.” He hiccupped, clearly plastered, “We neededed to get awayyyy.” he groaned. The dipshit is lucky I love him like my brother.

“And you guys couldn’t pick a closer bar?” I rolled my eyes. They’ve been going out and drinking a lot more these past couple of weeks after everything that happened with Elle and the past. No matter how hard we try to talk to her and fix things, she avoids us at all costs, all of us. I don’t blame her at all.

We all hurt her but I need to explain things to her. But I also have my own questions. I still have that text saved on my phone, unable to bring myself to delete it.

Rereading it kills me everytime and not in a good way.

“Mmmmm nope!” he laughed, “Besides Juju needed to drink away the hurt.”

“The hurt? Because Evelynn still hasn’t talked to you guys since we told her what happened?”

“Yep!” he sighed out, “She won’t talk to us. She won’t let us inside. Nothing. It’s like we disappeareddddd.”

“I told you all we needed to tell her sooner but no one listened to me.” I mumbled.

“You’re right. Always right. Need ride home. Please?”

“Only if you two help me win her back.”

“Done!”

I disconnected the phone and continued to make my way to this stupid bar. Everything that happened that day ran through my head on repeat and everything afterwards has been absolute hell. It hurt to walk away from her but it hurt even more to see the pain in her eyes. I just wanted to walk up those stairs and pull her into my arms and pull Aless into them as well. Even if she isn’t mine, she’s still related to me. She is my cousin’s daughter after all.

All I know is, is that I need them in my life. I’ve went seven years too long without them and suffered the most in the past two years. Watching them with Evan was like a rusty knife going into my chest over and over but she was happy. I couldn’t destroy her happiness with him no matter how hard I wanted to talk to her and tell her everything.

Maybe right now is the right time for all of this to come out. Evan is out of the picture, so is Patricia. That happiness he made for her is destroyed. The worst thing that happens is she hates me and wants nothing to do with me. If that’s the case, I will grant her that wish but only after I try my hardest to have her back in my life.

I have to do everything possible and I know for a fact I have a lot of explaining and making up to do.

That day, when I got back to my condo, the first thing I did was go to my workout room and beat up on the punching bag. I needed to release the frustration that was building up. I can understand why she’s feeling this way because she’s right.

I, no, we all had six years to cope with what happened. She’s had less than twenty four hours. I meant what I said. I would give up everything for her and I still would. While I was beating up on the punching bag, my mother called me. I glared at the phone, not wanting to do this now. She is the last person I need to talk to because I know exactly what’s going to happen.

She’s going to make my life a living hell, not that it already is.

“Mother.” I grunted while on speaker, still beating the bag, not caring what I was doing at the moment.

“Zander. What is the world is wrong with you?” she raised her voice at me.

“A lot.” Punch. Punch.

“Don’t give me that. You’re divorcing Patricia because of something silly like infidelity?”

“How can infidelity be silly?” I rolled my eyes, “Just because you were okay with it doesn’t mean I am. I have more self-respect for myself. I never wanted to marry her to begin with.”

“Well, if you didn’t sleep around like you did it wouldn’t have been a problem!” she defended. Fuckin’ hell.

“You know that’s not what happened.” I said angerly as I let the bag swing a bit. I just stood there for a moment, watching it and trying to catch my breath before sliding along the wall and sitting with bended knees, “But yes, part of the deal that I added in was she was not to sleep around on me and I was not to sleep around on her. I at least kept my d**k in my pants.”

“How vulgar of you to say that to your mother!”

“And how dare you speak of my failed marriage with me when you don’t know all the facts. Actually, I lied, you know some, but only the ones that you want to know.”

“According to her you never even touched her after the one night where she got pregnant and you were supposed to give me a grandchild for you to inherit the money from the family.” she scoffed, "You're lucky your father still gave it to you even though you both lost the baby."

“My statement stands. You only want to know the facts that you want to know but I guess it’s whatever you want to hear. But let me correct you, mother. What you mean to say is when she trapped me into the pregnancy to get me to marry her so she can inherit the Prescott fortune. Damn right I didn’t touch her and screw the money. I never wanted it anyway so you guys can take it all back. I never touched it! And honestly, who even know if that baby was even mine.”

“But you still got it, what more do you want? And don't you dare say that baby wasn't yours! You know she was a virgin with you two slept together."

"Is that what she told you?" I laughed, "If she was a virgin then I'm the prince of fuckin' Egypt."

"You got the money. You're getting a divorce. You're breaking my heart. What more do you want?"

“Freedom. I want the freedom to do what I want and be with who I want. And like I said mother, take back the damn money if it's that much of a problem!”

“Don’t tell me all this is about that girl from before.”

“Which girl are you talking about? According to you, there have been many.”

“Your cousins’ wife.” And I stopped immediately. My hands balled into fists and I started to see red.

“Soon to be ex-wife and what about her?”

“You’re still not hung up on her, aren’t you?”

“Mother. This is not the time for this. You know how I feel about her…you’ve known how I felt about her even before we moved when I was a kid…”

And she cut me off with a scoff, “I told you when you reunited with her in school to stay away from her. I told you her and her family were no good.”

“I don’t understand. You and Jean were best friends. I remember growing up with her before we moved. You guys were so close and…”

“There is so much more to that story Zander but her mother and I did not get along.” She scoffed again.

“Then tell me the reason. What the hell happened because to all of us kids, me, Evelynn, Connor and June, you all looked like you got along just freaken fine.”

“It doesn’t matter but what matters is that you fix things with Patricia and move on from Evelynn and give me a grandchild. You don’t need a girl like that in your life.”

“A girl like that? She is the best girl that I could ever have in my life! I don’t need someone like Patricia in my life. I don’t know why you are acting like this but it’s over. Patricia is nothing but a gold digger who has her own agenda. The divorce is official and she won’t be getting anything from me. She won’t get the house; she won’t get the car and she won’t get spousal support because she broke the terms of the contract and I have proof. I’m done and I have already discussed this with father. I haven’t touched her in the two years since we got married. I never wanted to sleep with her to begin with. I told you she drugged me.”

“You have no proof and you can’t…”

“I can and I will, it’s already done. And you have no proof that the baby she was pregnant with was even mine!” I snapped, “I told you who I wanted. I told you who I love but you didn’t care. Do you remember when I told you I wanted to propose to her, what you said?”

I could hear her roll her eyes, “Of course not.”

“That if I were to propose to her and start a life with that tramp, that you would cut me off and never speak to me again and you know what I said to you? I said fine, then it’s done. I told you if you loved me like you said you did you would support my decisions and you said you could never support something like this that could ruin my life. I told you to f**k off. You cut me off that night and I don’t regret it. The only reason why I still talk to you now is because dad asked me to. But you know what? You know what you didn’t know?”

“Nothing you say will ever change my mind Zander. I demand you fix things with your wife and-”

“The girl you hate so much, the woman you despise for some ungodly reason, the woman I love and was going to marry, was pregnant with your grandchild and we lost that baby when we got in the car accident that was caused by your nephew so tell me who the evil person is in this story. I stand by what I said before. I’m done. I’m done with Patricia and want nothing to do with her. I’m done with you and everything you want me to do. Cut me off. Take everything away from me that you claim to have given me. I don’t care because I am done. I am done with this family and everything it stands for.”

“Zander…” she started to say but I cut her off.

“No. I’m done mother. I am so done. Do not contact me again unless it’s to apologize and even then I may not even accept it.” And I hung up on her and ignored her incoming calls.

I sat on the floor, sweat dripping down my body as I ripped off my shirt and used it to wipe it all away. A knock echoed through the empty halls, gaining my attention but I didn’t move. The knocking continued but I still ignored it, pulling my phone back out that I dropped next to me and going through my pictures I had saved. Dozens of photos flooded the screen from our time together from college when we were friends all the way until the night I proposed, one final selfie of her and I, with me smiling into the camer and her kissing my cheek. I went to the picture and saved it as my background so I could see it everyday.

My life, my world.

Every time I had the guts to try to ask her out, Evan was always there to ruin it, like he ruined everything good in my life. I heard the door open and slam shut as I scrolled through the photos, “In here!” I yelled out to Travis, knowing it was him. He’s the only one who really has the guts to walk into my place without a care. Him and Elle but she doesn’t remember that.

He walked in with June and she looked like s**t. Her eyes were blood red from the crying she was doing and he looked a bit lost as well. “Taking your anger out on the bag?” he asked as they sat down next to me on the floor. Travis to my left, holding a bottle of jack and taking a swig to hand it to me and June to my right, her head leaning on my shoulder as she sat there and sniffled. I grabbed the bottle and took a couple of big swigs, needing to feel the familiar burn.

“Yeah and my mother called again.” I sighed out as I just sat there with my head hanging, shaking it. My relationship with my mother became super tense after we moved away when I was younger. I didn’t understand what was going on, all I knew was I was leaving my best friends behind.

“About what this time?” June asked wiping away the tears and sitting up straight, “Sorry, I got mascara on your shoulder.”

I shrugged, “It’s all good. Nothing that some soap won’t wash off but mom wants me to patch things up with Patricia and be with her again.” I groaned and they both just looked at me, “Not going to happen.”

“It’s your mom though Zander. We know her and we know what she may do to make that happen.” Travis mumbled, “Remember what happened in school when she found out about Evie?”

“Yeah. But I won’t let her get in the way. Not this time.” I looked up at them and saw even closer how broken they both are, “We need to fix this. We have to fix this.”

“I know.” June whimpered, “I need her. I just…I don’t blame her for cutting us out right now. It’s our fault all because of the crap that Evan knows and threatened. If I didn’t let him get to me then, then everything now would be different.”

“If he threatened those things now would you guys still walk away?” I asked them and they sat there silently for a moment.

“Not at all. Honestly, thinking about it now makes me wonder why the hell did I care about who found out about my private life. It is what it is. What we did in college is our business and if he wanted to spread that information around then so be it.” June sighed out, “I just wish I would have thought that back then but I was scared.”

“I agree. My reputation be damned because not only did we hurt her, but we also hurt you by not saying anything. It took a long ass time for you to forgive us but all we can do is give her time to wrap her head around it.” Travis said looking at both of us, “Because she’s right. She just found out about everything when we knew for years. A little at a time and hopefully we can rebuild our relationship with her.”

Everything kept replaying over and over in my head. The past week has been hell trying to run circles around my mother and avoiding Evan at work. He freaked out of me the other day because he was served with divorce papers while in the office and blamed me, of course, that's after him bragging to everyone about how they are together, thinking everything's fine. He accused me of being with her the entire time and ruining things but he’s delusional. I tried to tell him it wasn’t possible because he kept her fuckin’ locked up but he wouldn’t listen. I then looked right at him, punched him in the face again and walked out of the building.

I haven’t been back there in over a week. Dad suspended me and now has someone working on my contracts for me right now. I honestly didn’t care. They think I work there because of the inheritance in gaining the business but it’s the last thing on my mind.

Fire me.

I don’t want it.

I don’t want any of it.

The only reason why I worked there was because I was comfortable. I had a lot of connections from college and they helped build my clientele list and it just kept growing. He can give it to his nephew. Even the inheritance I got when I married Patricia, mom and dad can have that s**t back. I have my own money, more than they know.

I’ll go from billionaire heir to regular guy in an instant and have no shame.

Fuck them.

Actually, it’s already in motion they just don’t know about it.

I was broken out of my thoughts regarding the next steps in my life when I saw the scene of a massive traffic jam, “What the hell…” I whispered as I was caught in some traffic about ten minutes from the bar. The cars were inching forward so I took my phone out and called Travis back to let him know I was almost there but it will be a bit, “Hey. There’s an accident about ten minutes out. Make sure you two drink some water and sober up a bit before you chuck in my car.”

“Oh…Evie is coming…to get us…” he mumbled. He sounded a tab bit less drunk. At least he wasn’t slurring his words.

“Then why the hell did you call me?” I can’t be too upset. They actually called her and she decided to come out and help them so maybe this was the first step to her forgiving us? And maybe this is another chance for me to see her and try to explain things. I need her to know what happened all those years ago. I need to let her know it was me that was there for her all those times, not Evan, that he’s not the guy she thought he was.

All the good things were because of me because my cousin is a goddamn snake and a piece of s**t.

“Because I didn’t know. June told me about twenty minutes ago. I don’t know how she got her to come get us but she did. I was going to call you and tell you to stay home but I decided not to.”

“Whatever. I’m almost there. At least I can help get you two drunkards into the damn car and…oh…my…gosh…” My eyes went wide at the scene in front of me. As I pulled closer to the accident you can see one car facing the other direction and the front end completely destroyed. There was glass and fluids all over the ground telling me that most likely there was gas leaking.

“What? What happened?”

“The car…it’s destroyed.”

“Probably someone texting and driving.” I looked closer and saw a car I recognized. A car I was all too familiar with. A car that I bought for her when she needed something newer for her and Aless and Evan wouldn't do s**t for her. Her Mazda with the Dallas Stars sticker on the back window and a window sticker of two unicorns were a huge giveaway. It was her car. It was my girl’s car and it was destroyed. My face paled as I instantly pulled my car over, needing to get off the damn phone with Travis to see if she was okay.

I can’t handle this again if something were to happen. I almost didn’t survive the first time and I know I won’t survive this again. She has to be okay, she just has to be.

“No…it’s…it’s Elle’s car!” I screamed as I saw the firefighters pull her out of the car and onto the stretcher. Her arm was disfigured and she had blood all over her body. She was almost unrecognizable from a distance but I know it’s her, “Someone t-boned her and destroyed her car! f**k!”

“Wh-what? How bad?” he started to panic on the phone.

“I gotta go…it’s bad. Call an uber and meet at the closest hospital. Call Jean and have her and coach get Aless from school. f**k…” I started to panic as I ended the call, tears instantly forming in my eyes.

I can’t…I can’t handle this but she needs me even if she doesn’t know it right now. I’m not going to leave her side. Not this time.

I slammed the car in park and rushed out and ran to the stretcher. There was blood all over her face and a splint on her arm from where it was broken and she was fluttering her eyes. It looked like she was having a hard time breathing. With no shame, the tears started to silently fall as I pushed through people to get closer to her, I needed to touch her so she knew I was here.

“You need to step back sir.” The paramedic called out but I just pushed through and ran to her, grabbing her hand in mine.

“I know her…she’s…she’s….” f**k, get a grip, you dumbass, “I love her. She’s…she’s my…”

“Za-Zander…” She cried out as her breathing got worse, shallower, “It…it hurts…like…last…time…” I looked down into her beautiful, scared eyes and just gave her a small smile as I used the back of my hand to wipe away her tears softly. Like last time…does she remember? I shook my head forgetting about it right now. No, right now she needs to remain strong. I need to remain strong.

“Shh…it’s okay love…it’s okay I’m here. I’m right here and I’m not going anywhere.” I tightened my grip on her hand as they loaded her into the back of the ambulance. As they pushed her in, the grip on her hand lessened to where she let go of mine and her hand fell limp. The eyes on the paramedics went wide. They started screaming that she was coding.

“Follow.” One said while another started to work on her and before I knew it, they shut the door on me as I saw someone start to do compressions on her. I froze for a bit before turning around and running back to the car, speeding after them with no care in the world.

It was like what happened before. The accident. I almost lost her then and in a way I did lose her. I can’t. Not this time. I can’t lose her. I will do anything and everything to ensure that she’s okay and I will not leave her side until she’s home and healthy.

I rushed to my car and drove as fast as I could to the hospital. I called Travis and told him what happened and he started to panic on the phone a bit until he said their Uber was there to bring them. We needed our friends there. Travis could calm me down while June could be my sense of reason.

My hands were shaking the entire time as I pulled into the hospital. I was on auto pilot and as soon as I walked through those doors, I saw them wheeling her into a room. I followed quickly, making sure she never left my sight.

“Evelynn!” I screamed as I rushed over, standing in the doorway as the doctors started to work on her. They connected her to monitors and she was breathing again when I looked and she had a heartbeat. They were doing ultrasounds on her to check for bleeding and speaking in code that I couldn’t even comprehend if I wanted to. One of the doctors looked at me and pointed, screaming something at me. I just looked at them, not hearing them. I couldn’t hear anything and my eyes started to blur.

She was unconscious. She had no idea what was even happening. I looked at the doctors, needing answers but as I opened my mouth, nothing came out.

“Sir, you need to go wait in the waiting room. We need to get her up to surgery right now.” The doctor said gripping my shoulder, “I can see how painful this is for you, believe me, I’ve been there more times that I can count but I need you to trust me. If I don’t get her to surgery soon things could end a lot worse.”

“Worse? Surgery?” I asked those one words questions.

“Yes. Her spleen ruptured and she has a collapsed lung. We need to reset her arm and her ankle. We need to get her in there as soon as possible because if she gets worse...”

“Her…her…heart…”

“Stopped for a few moments but they were able to revive her in the ambulance. Now, I can see you care a great deal about her and maybe you can answer some questions for me.” he looked over at the other doctors and nodded, telling them it was okay to bring her out of the room and make their way to the OR. The doctor turned back to me, “What is her name?”

“Evelynn Jones.”

“Does she have any allergies to any medications.” I shook my head no, “Does she have any health issues I should know about that could affect her during the surgery?” I shook my head yes.

“Seven years ago we were in a major car accident. She had head trauma and ended up waking up from a three week coma but didn’t remember anything from the previous eight months. The accident caused her to lose our baby and…and…”

“We will check her head again with a CT scan as well. Don’t worry son, we got her. Now, go sit in that waiting room over there, the private one, and I’ll let the nurses know to send anyone in your party into that room. Call who you need. It’s going to be a while but we will update you as much as we can.”

He walked away from me as a nurse came over and took me to the waiting room. I was alone. It was too quiet while I waited for Travis and June to get their drunk asses here.

As much as I didn’t want to, I needed to call Evan. He is still technically her husband even though he was served with papers. As far as I know, he hasn’t signed them yet.

With trembling hands, I pulled my phone out and called the devil himself. The phone rang and rang until he picked up.

“What do you want?” he snapped.

“It’s Evelynn…” I whispered and told him what happened. With that, he hung up without saying another word. I don't even know if he's coming, but at least I did the right thing and told him...I think. I looked at the phone in my hands, dumbfounded and not able to utter a word as I sat in the room in complete silence, wishing, hoping that my girl makes it out of this one in one piece.