FOREIGN BLISS

CHAPTER EIGHT

It’s okay. Don’t think too much.

“What happened to your test result?” Daphne’s mom asked, holding the test paper she asked to see for herself. “I thought you studied?”

“I did.” Daphne answered softly, unable to speak in the usual volume due to shame and mixed emotions. “But at least I’m still the-”

“Sean is just a point away.” Her dad said, pertaining to their 2nd ranker, looking at her with serious eyes. “That is not what we call a gap. It’s just a minor score distance.”

It’s okay, you did your best. Daphne thought, internally comforting herself. Even her doesn’t understand on why does she feel so bad and over sensitive, like if she’ll think about it in a normal mind range, it sure is a minor problem. So why? Why do I feel like tearing up?

“But it’s not the final exam and I-” Her mom put the paper down and stared at her intently, stopping her from speaking. “That’s why you’re dependent on us. You can’t even attain good scores when we’re not reminding you.”

“You said you can study on your own we did let you go alone. But look at this. You missed seven questions.” her dad added, disappointment and sternness evident on his tone. “This is not the score that’ll make you stay at the position on where you are now.”

It’s okay Daph. Just say the words they want to hear, she thought, convincing herself to let this matter lay at rest. “I’m sorry. I promise I won’t do this again.” she said, almost inaudible.

Her mom sighed. “Just do your best next time. We were worried about you, okay?” she said before handing the paper back to her. “And remember, don’t let all of us-especially us that allowed you to be a doctor just like you want to, down, okay sweetie?” she added, tapping Daphne’s shoulder.

“Okay.” Daphne answered, taking the paper before standing. “I’m done eating. I’ll just go to my room and study for a bit before sleeping.” she said, bowing slightly before walking.

“Focus on anatomy okay?” her dad called out, making her face them and nod.

Upon reaching her room, she locked the door and tossed the paper on her table before throwing herself on the bed. It’s okay Daph. You’re okay. Even with her constant mental convincing to herself, tears still fell, defying her order to pull herself together.

It’s just a little mistake, why are you crying?!

Thoughts of self-pity and hatred started to revolve around her, making her torn between convincing herself to heal up and move on, or just succumb to the painful words and hide in the shadows while listening. Yes it’s little, but if it really is, then why did you still failed because of that little thing?!

“Damn, this is hard.” Daphne muttered, wiping her tears and covered her eyes with her right arm, breathing in and out heavily. “It’s okay. You’re okay.”

The saga of her heavily breathing continued, her mind started to rethink every mistake she did, everything she failed to do, and every people she’ll disappoint once she makes a larger damage to her supposed-to-be image.

“Why am I such a cry baby.” she muttered before removing her arm and slowly opened her eyes, staring at the ceiling while thinking of nothing positive. “It’s hard to act all the time. I’m getting tired.”

Her gaze turned to the closed window, revealing the slight light from the moon and some from their house’s post light outside, positioned in their garden to emit enough light when it’s dark. The leaves of the tree on the side were visibly moving, gently swaying with the night wind.

After a while of staring, she shifted position and glanced at the clock on her drawer, with the time reading 10:42 p.m.

With a sigh, Daphne took her phone beside her and opened it, opening her music app and just decided to sleep. When she’s down, music is her remedy, along with chocolates, because for some reason she doesn’t know, having them both made her feel better.

I can’t find a good one, Daphne thought as she browsed through her music. While browsing, her eyes landed to the music she listened before, the sole music of Gray Sky that was present on her phone.

Without thinking, she exited her music and opened the search site, searching for his songs. Along with their band’s music, several song covers made by him popped up as well, including songs that are mild, serene, and calm.

“What am I doing?” Daphne muttered while staring at her phone screen, where it shows some videos of him singing, photos that are either stolen or not, and lyrics of the said song cover.

“Why am I searching about him again?” she asked again, now more focused on her thoughts about him rather than her thoughts about herself, distracting Daphne on belittling herself.

 Even without answering her own question, she clicked on his cover of ‘Lifeless Beauty’, a song that tackles about a girl that is treated like jewel, yet feeling like a mere stone. Somehow, the message of the song touches her heart every time she’s listening on it.

How does it feel?

To have everything

Yet still feeling empty?

“Wow.” Daphne whispered, amazed by his vocals and deliverance of the song’s emotions, while intently listening to the song and staring at the picture they used for the song.

It was Christopher during one of their concerts, bending towards the camera while his hand was stretched out as if asking for her hand, his smile on full display and his eyes were full of warm feelings.

It’s okay, just take a rest

Cuz’ for me, you are the best

It’s okay, cry out the tears

Because I’m here

“Now don’t be a lifeless beauty, because you’re a true crystal for me.” Daphne sang along to the last lyrics of the song, unaware that her eyes had a slight glint of happiness and her lips were forming a small smile.

And with that, she scrolled to all his calm song covers, eventually falling asleep without thinking of those thoughts that keeps on dragging her down in the pits of darkness.

***

“What happened to your eyes, sweetie?” her mom asked worriedly, checking her after she went down to eat breakfast.

“Oh, you haven’t got enough sleep?” her dad chimed in, curious on why his daughter looked sleep deprived and with puffy eyes.

“I’m fine. Just stayed late because of having to help a classmate finish his homework.” Daphne said and yawned. Her parents were usually caring and loving, just like a normal family, it’s just that some days weren’t the same.

2 types of usual home, that’s how Daphne calls their family treatment. The first was the loving one, while the second was another story. That’s why Daphne hates herself on that part. Her being over-sensitive being too overthinker and all, she hated it.

Specially that her parents probably don’t think about it the way she did. See? They forgot about it again. So why am I hurting myself for that? Daphne thought as she silently eats her chocolate filled sandwich. I wish I can be like them too.

As their breakfast continues, her mom turns another page of her magazine, her dad keeps on reading newspaper, and Daphne quietly eats and glances at them from time to time, their usual sight were cut off when her mom spoke. “Do you have any plans this Saturday?”

“I think no-” Daphne stopped and looked at her mom. “I have. Why?” she asked, remembering that July is finally here and they’re currently on the last three days of waiting before Saturday comes.

“Is it urgent? If it’s not urgent, you can cancel it and come with me instead.” her mom answered, drinking from her morning green tea, before looking at her with a slight smile.

“I remembered that Julia asked me if I can bring you with me when we’ll go have our bonding together. You can see Neil there too.” her mom said before putting her magazine on the table. “So, are you free?”

Bonding? Daphne nearly scoffed at that thought. Or more like arranging me with him.

“No mom, I already promised my friends that’ll I join them next Saturday.” Daphne replied, taking the last sip of her milk, wiping her mouth before looking back at her mother. “Maybe just some other time.”

“Figures.” her mom said, lifting her tea cup before drinking. “You know Neil for year, you haven’t developed anything with him?”

“Yeah, none.” Daphne said and smiled curtly. “I need to go now mom, I might be late again if I won’t act now.” she added before standing up, looking at her parents before slowly walking back up her room.

“Why are you meeting with Carlsen again?” her dad asked loud enough for her to hear at the third step in their staircase in her way back up. “Neil seems like a good guy, besides their commercial business can help us a lot.” her mom reasoned.

Daphne just shook her head and continued walking, trying to remove the words she just heard and continue to fill herself with optimism. “I can’t be over sensitive forever.” she muttered before shutting her door and locked it, starting to prepare herself for another day.

After an hour of preparing, she stood in front of her mirror, doing her usual self-checking, where it reflected her cream long sleeves topped with black cardigan and faded blue jeans that are tightened with her brown belt.

“I’m good.” she said and sighed, about to turn around and take her bag when she looked back at her reflection, doubting it again. “Or not.”

“Never mind. Get yourself some confidence Daph.” she said, scolding herself before finally walking towards the table where her bag is currently in.

After finishing her self-monologue and other personal routine, she heaved a deep breath and closed her eyes for a short moment, calming herself and prepare her for whatever might happen.

“No matter what happen, try not to take it in too much. Calm down.” she muttered before stepping out her room and went downstairs, finally going to school with a high chance of not being late.

“Bye mom, dad, I’m going now.” she said as she passed by them, gave her mom a kiss in her cheek and her usual upgraded high five routine with her dad.

Taking her shoes, she faced them and waved her hand, which her mom gave back with a smile and her with a nod.

“Enjoy sweetie!” her mom called out before she closes the door. “Ace your activities Daph.” her dad said with a smile. Daphne looked at them and gave a thumb up, a smile decorating her face.

How can I enjoy and do my best to ace everything at the same time? Daphne thought as she moves her hands to get her car moving. “I’ll just try my best to do both, I guess.”

After some minutes of driving in the same road towards the school, she arrived safely and parker her car, then met Fiona who’s walking with a pack of cheese puffs on her hands on her way to their building lounge.

“Is that you Daphie?” Fiona asked with exaggerated facial expression. “My eyes weren’t playing tricks on me right?”

“I’m just a hologram Daphne Rosemoore sent to inform you she’ll be absent for a decade.” Daphne said monotonously, sounding like a robot, with her face blank and her eyes blinked twice after speaking.

“Why are you early Daph? And what’s with the eye glass? Did your vision gets blurred already?” Fiona asked, unfazed by Daphne’s lame joke and more curious about her suddenly wearing an eye glass.

 She did put a half rimless reading glasses before getting out her car, concerned with her puffy eyes that she thought weren’t properly concealed by the makeup she applied and wanted to at least hide it more, not wanting people to ask about it further.

“No, this is just a reading glasses.” Daphne said and shrugged. “I’m reading a book in the car during the traffic times back then, I’m just lazy to take it off so I’ll just go with the flow.” she said and walked forward, aiming to get a piece of the cheese puff but Fiona quickly swatted her hand.

“New fashion?” Fiona asked, which was answered by Daphne with a shrug. “You looked bitchier with glasses on.” she commented and sniggered.

“I get that a lot.” Daphne said and quickly took the chance of taking a cheese puff, shoving it her mouth in a speed of lightning. “Hey!”

“That’s why I don’t like wearing glasses.” Daphne said after swallowing, ignoring Fiona’s glare. “For some reason, instead of looking like a nerd, they say I look scarier with glasses.” she continued, explaining the reason why she’s used to it.

“But today’s an exemption because I’m lazy so yeah. That’s it.” Daphne said and tried to take another cheese puff, but unfortunately, her hand’s swatted once again.

“That ‘some reason’ you’re talking about is it’s because of your eyes.” Fiona said, pointing at her. “Your eyes sometimes- I mean, most of the times, look like it’s glaring even when you’re just staring.” she said and shook her head.

“Remember when Bettina tried to befriend you during our 10th grade?” she asked, making Daphne nod. “She told me that she changed her mind because you, my fellow transferee, look serious and unapproachable.” she said and smirked.

“Talk about our first days 3 years ago.” Fiona said and smiled fondly at the memory. The three of them all transferred at AU for almost the same reasons, because of that, they found a sense of connection and eventually became best friends.

“Rosemoore’s early?!”

Fiona and Daphne looked behind them, seeing their friend, Melanie look at them with wide eyes and a finger pointing at them. “Am I having delusions?”

“I’m just a holo-” Daphne’s repetition of her former response to Fiona was cut off when lots of cheese puff were shoved in her mouth, causing to look at Fiona before focusing on chewing the cheese puffs.

“Yeah, and that means you’re later than her today.” Fiona said on her behalf, not wanting to hear the somewhat lame answer Daphne gave her when she asked almost the same thing.

“What’s with the glasses?” Melanie asked after reaching them, her brows knitted on her friend’s sudden choice. “Gonna apply for a strict professor or something?” she added with a teasing smirk.

“Just lazy to take it off after wearing it to read in the car.” Daphne answered, rolling her eyes at having the almost the same question being asked to her one more time.

But deep inside, she felt happy. She’s afraid of letting people know her other self, and she’s glad that her friends focused on the brighter side, making it easier to talk and interact with them.

After their short talk in the middle of the school grounds, they walked towards their building, deciding to just go straight to their room and hang out while waiting for their first professor to show up.

“What should we wear on Saturday?” Fiona asked, comfortably siting on her chair with her browsing aimlessly at an online shop that shows varieties of clothes and other female accessories, waiting for them to respond.

“Should we have a color code?” Melanie suggested, also looking at her phone who’s scrolling down her social media account.

“Maybe not necessary, but we can have matching styles of clothes.” Daphne said, her eyes focused on her phone, busy on looking on her music app and choosing a song. In the end, she picked one of Christopher’s cover songs, playing it after putting her ear phones in.

“You agreed in matching styles for the concert?” Fiona asked with wide eyes. “You won’t stop us in planning or something?” Melanie continued, also shocked with what she just heard.

Daphne shrugged. “There’s nothing wrong anyways. Besides, it’s our first time to go to a concert altogether.” she said and looked at them. “We have to make it memorable.”

“Aww! I didn’t know you can be sweet!” Fiona said and leaned towards them, engulfing them in a side hug. “Looks like the sweets and chocolates you’re always eating made you one of them.”

After parting with them, Fiona clapped her. “We should wear dresses!” she exclaimed excitedly, looking at them back and forth with gleaming eyes.

“But it’s cold!” Melanie protested immediately. “We should just wear something cozy.”

“But it can be a dress with coat, leggings or boots.” Fiona answered after hearing her statement. “There are many ways to enjoy a dress.”

“But that’s too flashy.” Daphne commented, joining in their conversation. “We’re going to a concert Fi, it’s not like we’ll meet them up close to dress up that much.” she added, supporting her reason.

Fiona sighed and showed them her phone, now on an article she just searched on some seconds ago. “I planned on showing you this on Friday, but I guess I have no choice.”

Daphne and Melanie looked at each other before reading the article together. Without finishing, their eyes widened at the certain words that were written in the published news yesterday.

“They’ll do a fan meet?!” Melanie asked loudly, earning their classmates’ attention, causing her smile sheepishly and held out a peace sign.

“Shh! There are lots of RDs and even Dreamers here!” Fiona whisper shouted while her hand’s covering Melanie’s mouth. “Don’t cause ruckus!”

“Dreamers?” Daphne asked, making them look at her, with Melanie removing Fiona’s hand to look at her properly, both of them staring at her blankly.

“You’re really a hopeless cause.” Fiona said, shaking her head. “But at least we know it’s still Daphne that we’re talking to.” Melanie said, nodding understandingly.

“Anyways, Dreamers are what the other famous band, 4Waves, calls their fans.” Fiona said. “Because according to them, they were once just dreamers who wanted to have their talents known. And they’re lucky that people can see them now, they wanted people who supports them to dream for themselves, so that’s why they were called dreamers.”

“They have four members, one pianist, one drummer, one guitarist and one vocalist.” Melanie said, continuing to fill Daphne with information. “Hedrix Jefferson, he has a brown hair and cute smile. He goes with the name of ‘Apollo’. It really fits his sunny personality.”

“Yep, he won’t be their group’s happy pill if he’s personality is stormy.” Fiona joked, earning a sigh from both her friends.

“Don’t mind her.” Melanie said and moved, blocking Fiona from Daphne’s sight. “Next is their leader and pianist, he’s also the eldest in their group. He has blonde hair, and he’s name is Jacob Klein, going with the stage name of ‘Hephaestus’.”

“It really suits him because of his hot look that literally sets fire on stage.” Fiona chimed in, harshly swatting Melanie’s face from behind, showing her face with a huge smile. “He’s hot, you know.”

“Care to say sorry?” Melanie asked, glaring at her, which Fiona only replied with sticking her tongue out and rolled her eyes teasingly.

“Whatever.” Melanie said, releasing a sigh. “Next is their guitarist, he has black hair and unique smile. He is Travis Kurtsenn, and goes with the stage name of ‘Hermes’, which suits because of his fast way of changing his facial expression.”

“That’s true. He can be a cutie and then a hottie in a millisecond.” Fiona commented, nodding. “He’s also fast at making women fall for him. Talk about speed.”

“And their vocalist is Jason Parker, the one with gray colored hair. He goes with the stage name of ‘Ares’, which, again, suit shim because his voice and looks can literally kill and make him win a war instantly.” Melanie continued, ignoring Fiona’s another side comment.

“Yes, his voice is so amazing! His looks can kill and it’s definitely a high quality one.” Fiona remarked. “All of them were handsome, and of course, Denver, Johann and Christopher were also handsome.”

“You sounded like their fans too.” Daphne said after hearing them say lots of compliments to the four mentioned that were currently unknown to her. They looked at her with a smile, nodding in unison.

“They’re both fantastic bands.” Melanie said. “Yeah, wish they can just combine their groups and create music together.” Fiona said and sighed.

“Have you guys noticed something?” Daphne asked, making them look at her curiously. “We’re supposed to have our first subject 10 minutes ago.”

“Sir’s absent. He just me a message some time ago.” Yuan said, shaking his head while looking at them. “I’ve been here for a while yet you girls completely ignored me.” he said as he seated comfortably in his chair backwardly, resting his hands in the chair’s head.

“Your presence isn’t that useful.” Melanie said, rolling her eyes.

“Oh yeah?” Yuan challenged, his smirk visible. Melanie just rolled her eyes and gestured for him to go away, yet he did the opposite.

Melanie looked at him with complete shock, surprised with him quickly leaning towards her, closing their distance together. “You sure about that?” he asked in a low, teasing tone.

“J-jerk!” Melanie stuttered as she pushed him away and looked down on her lap, hiding the redness that was slowly covering her face.

Daphne raised her brow in the sudden action, looking at Yuan who’s smirking he just won, who looked at her and wink, probably saying that he did good in teasing her.

Fiona covered her mouth tightly, stopping her laugh to come out and just let herself tease Melanie and her denseness. When she can’t contain it anymore, she burst out laughing.

“What?” Melanie asked softly, yet her eyes were glaring and her cheeks were tinted with red.

“Nothing. Daphne’s just being funny.” Fiona said, covering her mouth once again to stop herself in teasing her, her way to at least help Melanie to get over the shame and for her blush to disappear.

“Why me?” Daphne asked, rolling her eyes. “Just admit that you find Melanie being a blushing mess a funny one.” she said and waved her hand as if saying it’s a small thing.

Yuan sniggered and held out his hand for a high five, which Daphne responded with her palm opened, making Yuan do the move and get the high five his own. “I’ve been meaning to ask you this, but what’s up with the glasses? Got blurry vision?”

“Nah. Just lazy to take it off after wearing it to read at the car during stop times.” Daphne said, checking her face on the screen of her phone. After seeing that her eyes got more recovered and she’s satisfied already, she removed the glasses.

“There, no one will ask me anymore.” she said after putting her glasses back in its case and inside her bag.  “Anyways, for our clothes this Saturday?” she asked, bring back the topic they’re supposed to discuss, trying to stop the topic about her.

“Ah right!” Melanie and Fiona exclaimed in unison.

“Huh?” Yuan asked, confused with the sudden change in the atmosphere, looking at Daphne for some answers. But instead of having what he expected, she gave her a shrug and tapped his shoulders, leaving him more confused on what’s the deal between the girls. 

"It's about the concert you're asking to tag along." Melanie answered then rolled her eyes, still upset with the thought of having Yuan mess with her when she just wanted to enjoy.