Badboy for a Boyfriend

Chapter 13

It had become a usual date. I had never been excited for weekdays. Particularly for lunch break at school. I did not want to consider it as excitement either yet. Still, I believed I had something to look up at ever since that lunch on the rooftop started.

The lunch was dull and boring and plain than the ones I usually had with my friends. But I knew it wasn’t dull, boring, or plain. At all.

The scheduled meetings with the Silveros and the Roswells were skipped twice. It wasn’t rare. Most times, both parties had to as everyone was considerably busy with lots of matters, too.

Razbill and I continued the lunch at the rooftop. I was glad no one had discovered our little secret but not so secret place. Maybe there had been a few who noticed me coming back here, and Razbill, too. But as I was discreet with my actions, too, I believed we were safe. 

When we had a meeting with their family again, I could see a very different Razbill Silvero than everyone else on our table. This time, the telepathy wasn’t a failure. The entire conversation was serious and rigid. But our eyes sparkled as we found something funny at many things. At every single detail in the dining. One moment, my Mom mentioned how delicious the food was and she could have it everyday in her office.

Our eyes automatically locked. I would have carelessly giggled if we were alone. I could only bite my tongue. He hid his amusement with his fisted hand. When Daniella noticed him, he pretended to be playing his lips with his fingers.

“You must be presentable in front of everyone at all times. Whether in the office or at school,” my father added when the discussion went to how Razbill was often seen around the campus without his coat on. 

Mr. Silvero said nothing to support my Dad’s statement. While Mrs. Silvero raised her brow to the diamond earring of Razbill.

It had been agreed school meetings would be merely about school and office meetings for business matters. However, this was about professionalism and looking decent. 

I did not exactly understand what was funny or what gave away the impression that we’re enjoying an inside joke just by looking straight in each other’s eyes. I simply knew we were. It was palpable by the look in our eyes.

I had no idea how long we had been stealing glances before I noticed Dayshawn’s eyes on me. I glanced at him twice. I didn’t have the courage to look away as I knew he had caught me red handed. 

He expectantly narrowed his eyes at me. The smile creeping on the corner of my lips fell. I only looked away to see if everyone also noticed. 

They didn’t.

They were busy with their food and lost in their own unreachable world. Daniella felt my eyes on her. She smiled widely. I tried to mimic but I was too nervous for a genuine smile.

However, when I peeked at Razbill, he had a lopsided grin that was trying to reach his eyes. I refused to react. Or else, I would have either widened my eyes at him in warning. Dayshawn’s eyes were still closely watching our odd interaction in secrecy.

“Are you free tomorrow?” he finally asked. Although I had antivirus he would have said something by the look he’s giving away, I didn’t expect it to be this.

I sat up straight and turned to everyone. My eyes stayed longer to my father who had to lift his brows to demand my response.

I cleared my throat and nodded. “I’m fine after class.”

He gave a discreet look to Razbill’s direction. “I’ll have training until then. We can meet after.”

I smiled in agreement. This was unexpected. He’s often busy during weekdays. He never let anything get in between his schedules. Especially if it was about football.

I refused to look up at Razbill Silvero after that. We were doing nothing wrong. I felt like we did. Guilt crawled up to me after Dayshawn witnessed our secret glances.

“You and Dayshawn… what are you?” Razbill asked as we finished our lunch. Once again on the rooftop.

I had requested a packed lunch from our maid and she put it in a nice paper bag. I asked the night before out of excitement. They were surprised at my request. I added that it should be delicious and could be a full course if they could.

I think they were also excited because I never had asked them for a packed lunch since I went to International High Manila. I didn’t tell them to keep it a secret from my parents. 

They could. I would know if my Mom asked me. Only if they would be curious enough.

I had the best lunch ever. We had a personal chef at home and he put what he said was my favourite. Though I did not recall ever naming salad, steak, and onion rings my favourite.

Still, Razbill and I enjoyed it. He wanted me to give praise and his gratitude to the chef but I couldn’t. 

Razbill didn’t bring his own because I insisted on this but he firmly said he would bring his own again tomorrow.

We were putting all the stuff we used back into the paper bag when he asked that question. I remembered how my friends were dying to see what was inside the paper bag. I deprived them of that privilege. I was probably shy. Besides, I didn’t want them to know about Razbill’s and I’s little… lunch dates.

“What do you mean?” I asked back.

Shrugging, he replied, “is he your boyfriend or something?”

“No,” was my honest reply. He stared to weigh my reaction. His brows knitted together. I didn’t want to believe he was being nosy or prying. I think he simply wanted to know. I just couldn’t tell why.

“I at least expected you to laugh if it sounds ridiculous. You can say he’s a brother to you.”

I blinked and looked away as I thought it through. “He could be,” I murmured more to myself but enough for him to hear, too. I bit my tongue to the spreading bitterness as bile rose. “He’s like a son to my father. We could be like brother and sister to my parents’ eyes. For Dayshawn and I, we’re merely friends.”

“What about your other friends?” he added. I looked back at him in confusion before I realized who he was talking about.

“Tanner, Sue, and Jean? They’re my best friends.”

“We have different levels of friendship, don’t we? How different is your friendship with Dayshawn that your other friends? Tanner, you say? Don’t you have something special with Dayshawn or with him? That Tanner.”

“Why are you asking?” I couldn’t help but ask. He defensively shrugged and mirrored my smile.

“I’m wondering?”

“Why?” My eyes and lips widened in realization. No matter how funny my thought was, I laughed. “Don’t tell me you’re really into me? That’s why you asked me to pretend we’re dating?”

“Pretend, Roswell. You’re beautiful but I don’t like you romantically. Okay?”

“Ouch!” I put my hands across my heart to show I was feigning my pain. Deep down I knew better. 

We were just joking around. But somewhere in my chest, I felt a fang of pain. Like an arrow thrusted at me. It wasn’t a mere arrow. It was poisoned with bitterness. 

Still, I continued to plaster an amused smile. “You’re mean!” 

He chuckled. My erratic heart started to calm down. So did my laughter. Which I was glad of or it would have shook if continued so. I didn’t want to give away an ounce of my true emotion.

Two hours and a half. 

Dayshawn and his team needed extra training. I understood. He approached me on the bleachers several times during their quick water breaks but I firmly said I understood. 

I was enjoying watching them until it became dark and all the lights and posts around the field lit up. This was not my thing. I didn’t really enjoy it.

It was around 6:30 PM when the coach called it a day. Everyone ran to the bleachers for water and let go of a breath. Their shoulders had fallen down in exhaustion. The shirts were soaked with sweat.

Dayshawn walked to me but my smile was not as enthusiastic as two hours ago. I had to force it this time and while making it look genuine. 

Other students also watched the practice with me. At this hour, everyone could go to each other’s lots as long as for reasonable purposes. Most of those who stayed to watch the practice were juniors like me. 

I didn’t dare study what their relationship was to the other athletes. In two hours, some of them had gotten well with each other. If I was not mistaken, they were separately cheering for their players until I came to watch and the cheering somehow subsided. It came back about an hour ago and I noticed the distance they left from me. 

I didn’t mind.

For two hours and a half, I didn’t leave my spot. 

“I’m sorry. I thought we’ll be out at dismissal,” Dayshawn said after drinking on his tumbler. They had their own gallon of water where they refill their tumblers. He consumed so much water than I could take in a day.

I remained seated.

On my peripheral view, I saw the other students were either offering water or helping wipe the players’ sweat off their faces with the towel. My shoulders were too rigid and my back hurt from sitting upright for hours that it didn’t register on me. I had to move already.

I watched as Dayshawn wiped his own sweat and put his things in his bag. It took me this long to realize some of those watching in the bleachers were actually his fans. They were not brave enough to approach him. And I was there, taking what others were dreaming of, for granted.

“Is it sort of a fixed marriage?”

I remembered Razbill asked when I didn’t give him the answer to his question. I failed to think it was necessary. When I glanced at him, he’s eyes and mind were somewhere else. He knew I was staring so he turned back to me.

Everyone probably thought that same thing. Even Dayshawn and I. But we never discussed it. My friends never mentioned anything about it either. 

I didn’t know the answer, so I settled with, “We never talk about it.”

“But you think?”

“It took me long to answer. I laughed shakily. “We’re two young for that. Why are we talking about it again?”

“I’m making sure I’m not putting you in a bad light if our dating spreads out,” he finally admitted. I would have been speechless. I didn’t let myself though.

“We’re not dating,” I had to tell him. “This is not dating. In fact, this is my place. I’m only being kind enough to share some space with you.”

My tone had soon become serious. I failed to disguise it. I had become defensive.

He noticed and shook his head. But with a smile on his lips. 

“Besides, that dating will surely put me in a very very bad light,” I added.

“I will never mean it,” he sincerely said but coldness lingered in his tone. He still would. He knew he would. I knew he would. Because he had to. 

This time, I had nothing to say. My mind was somewhere else. I wished I could really read his mind. Exactly as what it was. Not what he wanted it to appear.