Back and Better

Prologue “f*****g nerd!”“No, she’s really a dumbass.” “Either way she’s disgustingly ugly.”“Four eyes.” “Bitch.”“Slut.”“Cunt.”“STOP!” I begged amongst all the yelling. The Alpha’s son, Erebus, walks up to me, gripping my chin between two fingers and tilting it up. “Why would we stop? You’re the perfect punching bag. Weak, ugly, fat… All your good for is taking out anger on. Never forget that.” With that Erebus turns on his heel and walks away, the rest of the pack following him.I was left in the high school yard, bleeding badly from the latest beating I’d received on the Alpha son’s command, and wishing for death. This memory from earlier today plays over and over in my mind, causing me to be more and more serious about the action I’m considering. My name is Amira Warner. I am 15 years old, turning 16 tomorrow, and am midway through my sophomore year at high school. I am part of the Red River Pack, and I am pretty much the b***h of the pack—the runt. As the runt, I’m singled out and f****d with every single day, the bullying ranging from verbal abuse to physical beatings. Our future Alpha, Erebus, is the one who does most of the verbal abuse and does not discourage the beatings. His dislike of me alone is enough to incite the rest of our classmates against me; the occasional cruel comment is enough to set them on me like a damn mob. I’m well aware I’m not the skinniest, prettiest, strongest, or fastest girl out there—and I can’t possibly be as bad as they say I am. But years and years of hearing how deficient and disgusting I am have taken their toll, making me lose interest in the idea of even having a future. Tomorrow, when I turn 16, I’m supposed to shift into my wolf and first find my mate. The thing is, I no longer want any of that—after the beating today, I’m just about done with everything. Once I’ve hobbled my way home from school, slowly due to my injuries, I pat the razor in my pocket, one I painstakingly extracted from a shaving razor earlier in the week, and head into the forest behind my house. I don’t know how far I walk, but I find a beautiful meadow that seems like the perfect place to say goodbye—a beautiful final image as I depart, hopefully onto something better than what this life’s had to offer. I take a seat underneath a sprawling oak tree, and pull out the razor, examining the shiny piece. I’ve always been called a wimp. But I’m not going to be. I’m going to finish myself once and for all, free myself to move onto something greater, because clearly there’s nothing for me in this world. God, but what about my parents? They don’t know about any of the bullying, because my brother heavily participates in it. I fear they wouldn’t believe me if I tell them. Honestly, it’s better if they don’t have an explanation—I don’t want to worry them or cause unneeded pain. I take a deep breath, and dig the razor into the crook of my elbow on my left arm. I drag it all the way down to my wrist. Pain blooms along my skin, spreading in every direction, but it’s easy to ignore considering that my entire body’s in pain. My classmates never take it easy on me. I’m starting to shake from the exertion, so I use the last of my remaining energy to repeat the action on my right arm. I thought I would panic, but I don’t. There’s never been any good in this world for me, so I don’t mind leaving it. I barely know my parents, my brother despises me, and my entire pack has it out for me just because the next in line Alpha decided he hates me. Now, I feel perfectly calm for the first time in a long time. Peaceful, even. That is, until a strange voice cuts across the silence and disrupts my peace. “Hey man, you did f*****g awesome in training.” The masculine voice is followed by three sets of footsteps. “Yeah, you too,” another obviously male voice responds. “Awww, my baby brothers are doing so well,” A third male chips in. “f**k you, Alpha,” the first voice says. “Pass. I’m not into incest,” The third voice replies. “Wait, do you guys smell that?” There’s a pause in the conversation. I remain in my spot, slumped against the tree, not altogether interested in whatever conversation’s happening around me. A feeling of weakness is slowly taking hold over me, and my vision starts to blur as more blood escapes my wounds. “Blood” The three men say together. The footsteps run in my direction, and then three boys are suddenly kneeling in front of me. I can’t see clearly anymore, but I think I can make out concern on their facial expressions. I also make out that they don’t go to my school, since I’ve never seen them before. Despite my lagging senses, I also notice that all of them are also gorgeous. Muscles stacked on muscles. “Oh my god! I think she’s trying to kill herself!” “JASON! GET THE FIRST AID KIT FROM YOUR BACKPACK!” Shit, that was definitely an Alpha voice. I can tell because of the weight behind the words—it’s like a physical force that could easily compel submission. Erebus has used it with me plenty of times to force me to submit to whatever humiliation he’s decided. Welp, at least they can’t kill me now. I’m already mostly dead. With that thought in mind, I let my eyes shut, ready to be gone already. “Sweetheart, what’s your name?” The Alpha asks. “f**k off,” I slur. “Let me die in peace, please.” My eyes snap open when I feel someone pick up one of my arms, in time to see one of the strangers securing several butterfly band aids over the cut, sealing it. I’m too weak to stop him, all I can do is watch as he neatly seals and bandages both of my cuts, saving my life in the process. “f**k!” I exclaim. Even if I can’t move, I can still talk. “What the hell, assholes? Can’t let a girl die in f*****g peace? Damnit, I should have kept walking. Never trust a pretty place as a suicide spot.” All shifters start healing at accelerated rates after their wolf has surfaced, but even before they heal a little bit faster. Because of this, my vision starts to clear up. Three boys kneel in front of me, not from my pack, though I already guessed that. Now, I can see they can’t be much older than me, and are all very good looking. “Honey, why would you try to kill yourself?” That’s all it takes to burst into tears. Through sobs so intense they shake my body, I spill my guts to them. I tell the three boys about all the bullying, the name calling, my birthday being tomorrow and me not wanting to live another year in misery, and everything else. “f**k. I would try to kill myself if that happened,” One of the boys say. “Who are you?” I whisper. The boy kneeling directly in front of me speaks up. “I’m Damon Erickson. Next in line Alpha for the Blood Warrior’s pack. These two i***t twins are my brothers, Jason and Derick. But you can call them dumb and dumber.” I laugh slightly. “If only you guys were my pack maybe I’d still want to live,” I say with a sigh. The three boys exchange a look. They seem to be mindlinking. Mindlinking is an ability all wolf shifters have within their packs; a gift of telekinetically communicating with other pack members. “Yeah, I don’t see why not. We’ve always wanted a little sister.” Jason says. I snort. “Teasing me will not help. You’ve already interrupted my suicide attempt, so you guys can go home. Thanks for the delay in death.” Damon takes my hand in his, causing me to flinch. Most of the time, a touch from someone is closely followed by pain. “Amira, I’m the next alpha. I can do whatever the f**k I want. And having a little sister is very much what I want. Especially one as feisty as you. I mean hell, you were just on deaths door and the first thing you said was “f**k off.” If you want in my pack, we’ll take you with open arms and hearts. Someone like you should not be getting hurt. I can see great potential in you.” I start crying again. “Really?” I ask. “Yeah. Really.” He says. “Tomorrow at 9pm, meet me here. You don’t need to pack much, what’s ours is yours if you agree to come. I’ll speak to our parents about adopting you. Yeah?” If this is a dream, it’s a beautiful one. “Yeah.” Several hours later and with two bandaged wrists I head home. I avoid my brother, and don’t bother looking for my parents because they’re on another trip. They’re always away—I don’t know that they would’ve known I’d died until weeks later if I’d been successful in my earlier attempt. Now, though, I’m feeling better, because I might finally have something to look forward to. It’s already 10pm, so I go straight to bed. While in my room, however, I pray to the moon goddess. “Dear heavenly goddess, I come before thee to ask of a large favor. I am leaving this pack tomorrow with no intentions of coming back, and I don’t want anything to anchor me here. So if my mate happens to be in this pack, allow me to separate from the bond. Please.” I open my eyes, only to be met with a glowing celestial woman. The tall figure gives off a dim glow that reminds me of the moon, wears a flowing white dress, and is beyond beautiful. When I prayed, I didn’t expect for anything like this to happen—for my prayers to be answered so directly. “Moon goddess?” I ask. “You may call me Selene, child.” She responds with a gentle smile. I bow my head to her in respect, but she steps forward and uses two fingers to tilt up my chin. “No need for that, child. We will be seeing quite a bit of each other. Now, if it is your wish that you don’t feel the pull of the mate bond if your mate is in this pack, I will honor that wish. But in return I ask one thing.” I nod, ready to offer anything. She’s not telling me that my mate is in this pack, but if he is and she’s willing to help, I’ll do whatever it takes. I never want to come back here, ever. “Never bring intentional harm to yourself again. You have a wonderful purpose in life, and it would break my heart to see you pass it by because of some silly pups that bully you,” She says, stroking a hand through my hair. “Of course, Selene,” I respond, awe-struck. “Uphold the end of your bargain and I shall do the same with mine. A word of advice: Trust the new family you will come into in the Blood Warrior pack. They will be that who you grew up without.” With those words, she disappears.