Alpha's Legacy (Black Moon Saga Book 3)

45. A Vamplock's Dilemma: Grayson

Anna Jade is asleep in the bed when I enter the room, but by the look of her, she hasn’t slept very peacefully, and I think she’s been crying.

Where does kid-napping innocent young hybrids fit in the ‘not such a bad guy’ story?

I can remember her asking me that the first night, when I was trying to brush all this off as nothing personal and not a reflection of who I am as a person, but she’s right. I’ve done this. I’ve put this sweet, young girl in a horrible situation that she doesn’t deserve, and now here I am to make it worse. Or is it better if she doesn’t remember? I can’t decide.

But at least she’s asleep. Call me a coward, but I don’t think I could handle whatever expression would be on her face when she realizes what is about to happen. Which is why I make my way over to the bed as silently as I can, an easy feat considering that I’m both a caster and a vampire. If I don’t want to be noticed, I won’t be.

I make myself ethereal before I dare to sit on the bed, not wanting the mattress to dip or move in the slightest and risk waking her up. She shudders and whimpers slightly when she senses the cold tendrils of my fingers brushing across her forehead, but does not wake.

It doesn’t take me long to connect with her and begin my dive into her mind. For someone with as much power as she has, and who can be so stubbornly opinionated sometimes, I expected more resistance. But her mind is wide open for me. Nothing is closed off. I could view her whole life and everything about her if I wanted to.

I will admit that I kind of want to. I would if I had the time … and if the circumstances were different. I can’t risk growing any fonder of her than I already am because this will just become that much harder. So, I limit myself to going into her memories only as far back as the moment she met me and reviewing all the time that she’s spent in my custody. I must be thorough and scoop up every stray thought or emotion she’s ever had about me in addition to all the memories of me, or I risk leaving her confused and skeptical of her reality.

I find myself feeling strangely proud of her when I discover what she’s done right under my nose. That book that she loves doodling in, and those doodles that I thought were nothing more than a schoolgirl’s scribbling in some notebook, they were meant as notes to herself. A diary of sorts. A reminder of what she’s been through and all that she’s learned from me, though she purposely left the book behind when we came here in hopes that anyone looking for her might come across it.

It was clever, I’ll give her that, and uncharacteristically bold for her, but she neglected to consider one little detail. I’m not her dad, the master vampire Tian. I’ve never subscribed to any sort of vampiric philosophy, barely even accepting the fact of that being what I am now, and I don’t share his ethics. I don’t even know how to do this the way that he apparently does, entering a mind chasing some specific bread crumb and sticking to that path to preserve the privacy of the mind.

Not only do I have no idea how he manages that, but it would be stupid of me to try. The things that this girl knows that I couldn’t possibly have predicted going into this, those are the bits that interest me the most. Yes, I wish to erase the details that I’ve shared with her about myself, and my primary goal is to prime her mind to be traded off to the men hired by Alpha Miles, but I’m far more interested in what else I’ve learned from her, things I never would have known to look for.

And now, knowing what I know about how she’s viewed me through this entire experience, I also have a better guide for what she needs from me. She needs to remember me as a villain, even as much as it pains me to do. I didn’t expect for her to hold any affection for me, but it’s too late now to turn back, not without suddenly shifting tactics and trying to disappear with her entirely.

I’d like to think that at some point in the future, she’ll be reunited with her family. Alpha Miles is a piece of work, but he can’t possibly be idiotic enough not to see that I’m handing him a golden ticket that he should cash in for some favor with the Alpha of Black Moon. Regardless of whatever ill will he may have toward her and how much he resents her pack, he must see that becoming her ally is the best choice presently. He can betray her later, but for now, he should return her daughter to her.

But if I were to run off with Anna Jade simply to try to free myself from the burden of the arrangement I’ve made with him, then there would be no easy path home for her, not without risking myself anyway. She’d likely remain my captive for the rest of her life, coming along with me from place to place and living the life I’ve lived since escaping Raja’s prison. On the run, never remaining long in one place, not until I can somehow remove Enrique from the equation some other way.

No, the best way forward seems to be with Alpha Miles’s cooperation. And to get that, I must trade Anna Jade and hope that the man is not as rotten as he’s rumored to be.

It occurs to me that I’ve backed myself into a corner of my own making now, facing down the inevitability of trading the only person who’s ever looked at me as more than what I am, the first person I could hope to befriend – in exchange for the freedom that I’ve been chasing for so long. The ability to remain in my family home, to enjoy a stationary life free from the constant threat of exposure, at the cost of the companionship that I’ve sought after for even longer than my freedom. My entire life, really.

I didn’t know it until it was too late, but Anna Jade could have been that. Perhaps she still could be, if …

... No. I mustn't allow myself to succumb to such ignorant gobbledygook bred from hopefulness. Hope, I’ve learned, is far too dangerous of a thing for someone like me to grab hold of.

I can’t risk taking a chance on this Alpha Kylie and her powerful mates, not when they’re so close with The Council. I know for a fact that my mere existence will be bothersome for any Council agent, but especially for the agency as a whole, and I can’t risk trading one form of servitude and captivity for another or finding myself in some new and more permanent state of imprisonment.

Because the fact of the matter is I’ve done some unforgivable things in my time, and I’m fairly certain that returning one lonesome captive who I, myself, am responsible for abducting in the first place will not be perceived as redeeming enough to excuse my past crimes, or to overlook what I am. Should I turn a cold shoulder on Alpha Miles when I’m so close to getting what I need from him, that will be that. My fate as a perpetual fugitive will be sealed.

Which is why I figure I’ve wasted enough time and get back to work with Anna Jade’s mind. I remove almost her entire experience with me, and amend the rest, leaving her with the impression that I’m as horrible of a man as people say. Worse, even. Now, she’ll be convinced that I’m a cruel, sadistic monster, and that I’ve forced her to endure a fate much worse than …

Wait. No. That’s taking it too far. I don’t want to leave the poor girl traumatized like that. Perhaps it will have to suffice to make her think that I was cold to her. I never harmed her, but I never comforted her either, and we especially never spent any of our time chatting away or keeping each other company.

Oh. But the sketchbook would imply otherwise, and there’s nothing that I can do about that now. If any of her rescuers knows her well enough, it won’t take them long to discover the hidden details of her drawings. I suppose I could make it seem as though I told those things to her coldly and threateningly, though, attempting to instill fear into her and confuse her sense of reality with embellishments and exaggerations, telling her little more than rumors and tall tales.

Except there are those two particularly incriminating pages, the ones filled with details that I never should have let slip to her. And if I’m being honest with myself, it was far more than a little slip here and there. I had conversations with her at-length about personal details that no one else knows, secrets that no one else can know. If I let those details fall into the wrong hands, then this will all have been for nothing. My secret will be out anyway, and I’ll have far greater threats to contend with than the pesky, infuriatingly self-important Enrique.

Once I’m finished with her, I must get that sketchbook back. Destroy it somehow. Get my hands on everyone who has so much as looked at it. I don’t know, but I need to fix it. Now.

I guess the timetable has just been moved up a few hours. I need to hurry and finish with her so I can call Alpha Miles and have his hired men meet me for the trade sooner than we planned, and then I can try to make it back to the tunnels in time to retrieve that sketchbook. That’s the best-case scenario, anyway. Otherwise, well … I guess I might be in for a bit of a fight with the mercenaries that Anna Jade’s family hired to find her. I can’t let them discover my secrets.

But wait. Perhaps … No, no that would be folly. Alpha Miles is the enemy I know. These others, there’s no guarantee that they’ll be anything like Anna Jade, even if they do care for her. The vampire hunters are a testament to that.

It would risk too much to deal with them when they hold no power here, and it would mean betraying Alpha Miles and giving up my claim on my mother’s house, which I stand to inherit with Enrique gone. I’ve seen it in writing, though the fool never expected for me to be able to claim my birthright. He planned to remain standing in my way for all eternity, feeling altogether too secure in the knowledge that I cannot harm him.

Well, I might not be able to, but there will be nothing stopping the vampire hunters once they get their hands on him. They might even enjoy it, because it’s not just me they’ll be freeing. This entire city will thank them. The vampire infestation that has plagued this area for many years will no longer be a problem once he’s gone and they finish off the rest of his creations.

If I manage to earn some good will with the Alpha in the process, then I’ll end up in a better position to do something about the poisons he’s had me crafting, the ones he’s been peddling as enhancement drugs and party favors and pumping into the hands of werewolf youth all over the region. So you see, it’s all for the greater good, right? I can’t let myself be clouded by misplaced affection for one young girl when so much is at stake.

Settling on replacing Anna Jade’s memories and thoughts of me with substitutes that will leave her remembering her time in my custody as lonely, cold, and uncomfortable but not particularly traumatic, I set to work on carefully crafting and implanting the new set of memories. Then, I quickly design and implant a cover story that Alpha Miles should approve of, one which leaves her viewing him favorably, though I don't have time to make it particularly in-depth or ensure that it will firmly take root in her mind. Most likely, she'll awaken feeling vaguely familiar with the man, her mind eager and open to trust her rescuers and accept him as an ally. It's the best that I can manage with the time I have to work with, so it will have to do.

I still hope that he does right by her, but I know that it’s out of my control. She’s a customized commodity now, nothing more, and it’s not my job to give her any more or less than what my customer has asked of me.

An hour later, when the Alpha's hired crew of "rescuers" meets me in the agreed upon neutral location and takes custody of my hostage, who is still enjoying a vampirically-induced slumber, I somehow manage to keep a neutral expression and demeanor as I pass her limp form into the arms of their leader. The key to her collar goes to his second-in-command, and I must stand there and listen to them advising me about how Alpha Miles would like me to carry out "the plan" until I've agreed, and the second finally pulls out a burner phone and hands it to me.

I hold it up to my ear and listen to Alpha Miles delivering to me the information that I’ve just paid for: the coordinates for all the locations where Enrique can be found according to his usual routine, as well as the details of his normal schedule, making it possible for him to be found at any time of the day or night. And as luck would have it, once I return to my monitoring station, I discover that the hunters are already practically on top of the location where he should be at this time of day, enjoying a peaceful daytime slumber of his own right about now.