Warrior

Chapter 17-1

Chapter 17

I entered the dining hall, looking forward to spending time with Sara today. I didn’t expect her to feel the same way, but I planned to change that before the day was over. I was going to start with training and see where it went from there.

I thought she might respond better to me as a trainer, so I was all business when I reached the table where she sat with Jordan and another girl.

“Ready to start training?”

Sara nodded without speaking.

“Come with me then.” I turned away and left the room to wait for her in the main hall. She came out a minute later, looking nervous but resigned.

When I started for the main entrance, she said, “We’re not using a training room?”

I looked back at her. “I thought we’d go outdoors. Would you rather stay inside?”

“No,” she replied quickly and hurried to catch up.

Outside, we walked around the building and I steered us toward the woods.

“Where are we going?”

“For a walk,” I replied without looking at her. Seamus had told me about how many times he and Niall had caught Sara heading for the small lake on the property. I suspected she missed the ocean and was looking for a body of water to make her feel less homesick. I couldn’t think of a better place to start her training.

She harrumphed softly. “I think I should tell you that when I go for walks, I usually end up brought back in chains.”

Her wry tone made it hard to keep a straight face. “I think we’ll be fine.”

We walked in silence for a while before I tried to get her talking. “Other than the problem with your training, how are you doing here?”

“It’s not home,” she answered sharply, but I could hear the hurt in her voice.

I looked at her, and she stared straight ahead.

“I know you miss Nate and your friends, but it’s not like you won’t see them again. And you aren’t alone here. You’ve made some new friends, and you have Tristan and Chris and me.”

“Until you go off on one of your missions again.”

“Are you trying to tell me that you missed me?” I couldn’t keep the smile from my face. She wouldn’t be angry if she didn’t care.

“No.”

“I have no plans to go anywhere for the next month so you are stuck with me for a while,” I said, hoping to reassure her.

“Lucky me,” she grumbled, and I laughed, glad that she seemed more at ease.

“Where did you go?”

“It was a job, clearing out some nests,” I answered soberly. “Nothing you want to hear about.”

“You were looking for the Master, weren’t you?”

“You don’t need to worry about him anymore,” I said.

My words only upset her more. She stopped short and put her hands on her hips.

How did I make her understand that she no longer had to fear the Master? We would find and eliminate him, and all she had to do was train and settle into her new life.

“I’m not a child, Nikolas, and I deserve to know what is going on. If you can’t be open with me, you can go find someone else to train.”

I let out a harsh breath and grabbed her wrist when she turned to go back the way we’d come. “I see you are still the same pain in the ass.”

“Takes one to know one.”

I couldn’t see her face, but I heard the smile in her voice.

“We found where we believe Eli was staying in Portland, and there were signs that the Master could be in Nevada. It’s not surprising since Vegas is the perfect place for vampires to blend in and hunt. We hit a nest in Henderson and that led us to two more nests near Vegas, but none of them gave us anything useful about the Master. Whoever he is, he is well hidden and his followers have no idea where he is.”

She looked at me expectantly. “So, what happens now?”

“Now we train while someone else looks for him. A Master is no small matter, and the Council has made it a priority to find him. They’ve already sent extra teams to the US dedicated to hunting him. It is only a matter of time before he is found.”

We continued our walk until she let out a small gasp and broke into a run. I followed at a normal pace and found her standing at the edge of the lake, glowing with happiness.

I knew how she felt seeing the lake for the first time. I discovered this place a few days after Tristan and I came to the valley, and I used to come here to swim and be alone. I’d even considered building a small house here, but I’d never gotten around to it. It pleased me to know she loved it here too.

“This is incredible,” she gushed. “I can’t believe people don’t come here all the time.”

I smiled. “Not everyone loves the woods as much as you do.”

“Then why did you bring me here?”

“Because I’m not like everyone else.” I sat on a rock and motioned for her to take the one next to me. “Let’s talk.”

She sat hesitantly. “I thought we were going to train.”

“We will, but first I want to talk about your training. Callum told me you don’t seem to want to use your Mori strength or speed.”

“You talked to him about me?” she asked defensively.

“Of course. I needed to understand the problem so we can fix it.”

Talking to Callum had been a good idea. He might not have been the right trainer for Sara, but he was observant. He’d told me she was sensitive about her Mori whenever he tried to talk to her about it, and he suspected she was afraid of the demon. In his defense, he had no idea about Sara’s history or her unique ancestry, which made him unqualified to help her get past her fear.

She gave me a skeptical look. “You think you know what my problem is?”

“I have several theories. The first is that you are so used to suppressing your Mori that you don’t know how to do anything else. Demons are afraid of Fae magic, which explains why your Mori doesn’t fight for control like mine would if I kept it locked away. You need to learn to loosen your control just as you would exercise any muscle. It takes practice.”

“That’s it then?”

“That is one theory.” My gaze locked with hers. “My other theory is that you are afraid.”

She rubbed her hands on her jeans. “Why…would I be afraid?”

“I was there in the wine cellar, Sara, and I saw what happened when you let your demon out. I also saw the fear on your face when I asked you about it the next day. It terrified you how close the demon came to controlling you. But that would never have happened.” I hated bringing up that night in Portland, but she had to face her fears if she was going to conquer them.

She paled and turned her face away. “You’re wrong. It almost did.”

“No, it didn’t. Look at me.”

Her eyes met mine again, and I saw her distress.

“I would not have let it take you,” I said firmly.

“But if you hadn’t gotten there when you did, I –”

“You would have done it on your own. You’re a lot stronger than you give yourself credit for. The demon might have gained control for a short time, but you would not have let it stay that way.”

Hope sparked in her eyes. “How can you know that?”

“Because I know you. You are one of the most willful people I’ve ever met, and it would take a lot more than a demon to control you. That I know from experience.”

She gave me a small smile. “Are you going to train me to fight without my demon?”

“Today we are going to start with the basics. You will learn to open yourself to your Mori safely.”

She leaned away from me. “I can’t –”

“Yes, you can. This is something every one of us learns to do, and you will, too. You are a lot stronger than the rest of us were when we started.”

I took her hand in mine, hoping my touch would ease her fear. “Do you trust me?”

She nodded.

“And you know that I would never let anything harm you, right?”

“Yes,” she answered without hesitancy or doubt, and it pleased me to know she had such faith in me after all she’d been through.

I released her hand reluctantly. “Good. It might be easier if you tell me how it is that you are able to control your demon. How do you keep your Mori separate from your Fae power?”

Her brows drew together, and it was a moment before she answered. “It’s hard to explain. I can feel the demon in my head and sense its thoughts, or rather its emotions, if that makes sense.”

I nodded.

“When I was little I used to hear its voice whispering in my mind, kind of like a song you get stuck in your head and it won’t go away no matter what you think about. I think I was five or six when it first tried to come out, and it scared me so much that I accidentally released my power, which I had no idea about until that day. The beast – that’s what I used to call my demon before you told me what it was – was afraid of my power and it pulled into the back of my mind to get away from it. I was scared to death and I had no idea what was going on with me, but I knew I’d done something to make the creepy voice in my head quiet.”

Her eyes took on a faraway look. “It wasn’t until I found an injured robin and the power burst out of me to heal the bird’s wing that I realized what I could really do. After that, I had to learn to keep my power locked away and only call on it when I needed it and also how to tap into it to keep the beast – I mean the demon – caged in the back of my mind. The only times the demon seemed to wake up was when I did a healing and drained my power. That used to happen all the time in the beginning, but it doesn’t happen anymore.”

Hearing her talk about her childhood and how she’d had to learn to deal with a Mori demon and emerging Fae powers on her own, my respect for her grew tenfold.

“I don’t know if I am more amazed by your level of control or that you learned it at such a young age with no guidance or training. Are you consciously doing it?”

She shrugged, looking more at ease. “In the beginning I did, and it was hard as hell. I lost control of my power all the time because I had to focus on keeping the beast – demon – quiet. Now, it’s like breathing. I don’t have to think about it unless I use too much power and get weak. Then the demon starts to move and I have to use force with it. How do you do it?”

I laughed, trying to think of how to explain it to her. “Not like that. You talk about your Mori and your Fae power like they are parts of you that you move as easily as an arm or a leg. For the rest of us, there is no real separation between us and our demons. My Mori and I are joined completely, and I feel its thoughts and emotions as easily as my own.”

“How can you control it if it’s that much a part of you?” she asked as if she couldn’t conceive such a thing.

“I learned from a young age to suppress the demon’s natural urges just like you would any craving. But unlike you, I can’t block it completely, and I’m always aware of my Mori because together we make one person.”

She shook her head. “I don’t think I could live like that.”

“And I couldn’t live any other way. Now I understand why it’s so difficult for you to tap into your Mori’s strength. You keep it bound so tightly you aren’t even aware of its presence half the time. We need to show you how to get to know it.”

She clenched the bottom of her hoodie. “How do we do that?”

She wasn’t going to like my next words, but there was only one way to move forward.

“You said you keep it locked in a part of your mind, right? You need to loosen your hold on it and connect with it.”

She shot to her feet, her eyes fearful. “I can’t do that. You don’t understand how it felt when I let it out before.”

She was right. I’d lost control of my Mori as a child, but I’d never given myself up completely to the demon. I could only imagine how frightening that had been for her.

But she had won in that battle of wills, and her demon hadn’t forgotten that. She just needed to believe in her own strength.

“It won’t be like that this time because we won’t let it. Trust me.”