A Hidden Truth

A Nightmare

[Juniper]

    When we got to the house, we cleaned up and got ready for bed. My friends teased me all the way home about how I was dancing. I hadn’t intended to be suggestive, but as soon as I touched Jaxon I wanted him. 

    His suggestion of making rules, and the way he took care of me earlier, made me rethink my assertion that he only wanted my body. The kiss tonight showed me he was trying.

    Even after all the dancing, where I’d been all over him, he kissed me without trying to be aggressive. If Hank had seen me on the pole tonight, there wouldn’t have been anything I could’ve done to get him off me. It reaffirmed what I’d been thinking. Jaxon was actually sweet and it was my brain playing tricks on me.

    “So, are you gonna do him after the prom or just right in the middle of the gym?” Kelly snickered.

    I blushed. Of course, I should have expected the teasing. I acted out of character and none of them had ever seen how much I desired him. They only knew I liked him and Kelly knew I was trying to get him into bed. It’s one thing to hear something, but another to see it.

    “Yeah, that was some pretty intense dancin’.” Amber snorted.

    “I didn’t mean to. Sometimes, I just can’t control myself around him.” I said, quietly.

    “I was surprised he could. If Amber danced like that with me, I don’t think I could. I was already having a hard time.” Tammy was laying on my bed, propped on one arm with the other draped over Amber’s stomach.

    “Was it a good idea to leave him in that state with his ex? You don’t think he might… you know… do you?” Amber asked.

    I hadn’t thought of it. He said she was a friend that he’d had s*x with. They’d been in a relationship of convenience. But now they both liked other people. 

    Would they console themselves in each other? Had I basically sent him into her bed? I could feel the panic rise. If he left because of this, then it would be all my fault. He could just go back to her and I’d lose him.

    “Calm down, Juni! Amber was jokin’! No one thinks he’s sleepin’ with her tonight. Jaxon said he loves you. He really looked like he meant it.” Kelly shook me a little.

    “Can we just go to sleep? I’m so tired you guys.” I murmured.

    “Teddy told me how to take care of you. Amber and I will sleep in the bed with you. Kelly’s mattress is all settled on the floor over there. We’re all here for you. Okay?” Tammy said.

    “Thank you. I love you all.” I laid down on the edge of my bed.

    “We love you too, Juni. Get some sleep. We got a lot to do tomorrow.” Kelly said.

    I closed my eyes and was asleep in seconds.

***Dream***

    The view of the evening sky from my bedroom balcony was always my favorite. I leaned against the railing, not caring that my nightie was riding up a little. Large hands wrapped around me, caressing my breasts and sliding down to my waist. 

    I was lifted off the ground from behind and turned to face the French doors. He pressed me against the glass, hard. I couldn’t move away.

    Inside my bedroom, I saw Jaxon pulling someone in the door. It was Kenny. She was wearing a nightie like mine, but black. I watched as he pressed her against the wall and kissed her deeply. 

    She wrapped her legs around his waist and he carried her to my bed. After he pulled off his sweatpants, she sat up and slid him into her mouth. Behind me, Hank ground into my backside.

    His fingers pinched and roughly groped at my body while I watched Jaxon being sucked by his friend. Jaxon pushed her onto her back. She arched and I could see on her face the moment he entered her. 

    Hank’s hands slipped between my legs, his fingers demanding entrance. I tried pushing away from the glass, but he was stronger. I felt his tip forcing its way into me, guided by his fingers.

    Pain ripped through me from two different places. Between my legs when Hank started slamming his body into mine, and in my chest when I heard Jaxon telling Kenny he loved her. He was making love to her and kissing her tenderly all over her face and neck. 

    Hank pulled my hair back hard and tears streamed down my face. I couldn’t speak or scream. I had no voice. Both pains ran together and settled in my stomach.

    “See, baby-girl. I’m the only one who loves you. Next time’ll be gentle. This is your punishment for runnin’ away.” Hank growled in my ear as he rammed even harder.

    It hurt so bad. Watching Kenny get my soft, sweet Jaxon while Hank used me. I pounded on the glass, but they couldn’t hear me. I could hear everything as clearly as if I were standing right next to them. Hank kept going as hard as he could and I felt him finish inside me as Jaxon was asking Kenny to marry him.

    “Aren’t you glad you came back, baby-girl. Daddy’s gonna take care of you from now on. You can live in the guest house so your mama doesn’t get mad. I threw away your birth control. Now, you can start havin’ my babies. Remy needs some brothers and sisters closer to his own age.” He kissed my neck.

    I’d lost Jaxon. Hank said I came back. I must have decided this. Of course my daddy would take care of me. I needed to be punished for being childish and running away. Now, I could help raise Remy and I wouldn’t have to be without my adorable brother.

    “Thank you for lettin’ me come home. I’m sorry I was a bad girl, daddy. I’ll be good from now on. Please, don’t punish me anymore.” I wept.

***

    “Juniper. It’s Tammy. You’re okay. Wake up. I’m right here. I’ll protect you. He can’t hurt you anymore. Juniper. Wake up, honey. C’mon.” Tammy was repeating as I opened my eyes.

    “I brought Teddy!” Amber said from the door.

    I felt my brother climb in my bed behind me. I turned to him and clasped him to me tight. He rubbed my back and shushed me. It wasn’t enough. I still felt the pain in my stomach. It hurt so bad. I sobbed uncontrollably. I pushed Jaxon away, now he’d really leave me. He had other options and I was being difficult.

    “Teddy, you have to take her to the hospital.” Tammy was saying.

    “Why? She’s just havin’ a hard time.” He responded.

    “Look at her stomach.”

    I felt him pull away and I let him. No one loved me. I understood. The cool air stung at my stomach as my pajama top was pulled away.

    “f**k. GARY! Get the truck!” Teddy yelled. “It’s gonna be okay, Juni-bug. Tammy, get me somethin’ for the blood.”

    I could barely breathe and I felt like I was dying. I wanted to die. It had been so long since I felt like I just wanted to stop existing. 

    This was my punishment and I deserved it. The room darkened. Finally, I could stop ruining everything.